₦airaland Forum

Diligentnigga:
Good morning Nairalanders, I will make this as short as possible and please don't mind my punctuation as I am typing this in a rush

I am a graduate, though unemployed but doing one or two menial jobs to keep mind and soul together

I have this girlfriend I have been dating for almost two years now. We both love each other but the issue at hand is she's a stubborn, anger driven person that insults my parents. In fact hit me sometimes and says all manner of words at me.

Of recent, I found out she's pregnant this February. Now the issue is she's a finalist in the University as she will be serving this year October, but we had plans of not doing abortion but she's so ashamed of everything and just irrational and saying all manners like what people will say this and that, and I have told her I will stay by her through everything. I informed my mum and my immediate siblings about the pregnancy, they were angry but they were like it's fine sha since she's loved in the family

Now the issue is
1 She's very stubborn
2 she insults my parents at every small argument
3 she's anger driven, yes am anger driven to an extent also but I have never used my anger to do stupid things like hitting her before compare to many times she has Slapped, locked my shirt and punched me.
4 we had an issue last night and it was in public and she was just shouting at me, passers by and onlookers were just amused that why would a lady be like this that she now had to take a big stone and throw at me, though I dodged the stone all because i was gearing her to let's leave the public scene and go home
5 A baby is on the line cos she's pregnant and even if you will advise me to leave the relationship as it's toxic, what about the unborn child.
6 I am currently unemployed and in fact am still at home not yet balanced up well enough, but she has used nags to kill me, saying all manners at me

All insults are welcomed. Please I am in die need of advise thank you.

Show her love and she will change for good.

SweetCunt97:
uncle toks, you wanna apply?

Lol! She is a sweet looking lady but I'm not applying.

ChildOfDoom:
I am 29 years old. from Edo state. I admit that I am a bet9ja virtual (gamble) addict. if you are reading this and you know some one who plays the same virtual, don't bother wasting your saliva to advise them. they will surely go back to the act. it is a dangerous world of no return.

despite advice from friends and family, I still can't stop betting (bet9ja). we only change a little but once a little money gets to our hand, we go back to the act.

my life is being threatened as a result of this addiction. like I have mentioned in previous threads, I dare not step into Benin because I gambled with the phone of a 'strong man'. currently where i stay is top secret. lots of people are looking for me. I sold the Samsung a guy put in my custody and used it on betting. even someone's enrolment money for WAEC I was meant to pay on the person's behalf, was used by me.

there are other instances too numerous to mention. it's only a matter of time before I am caught and dealt with. I know some in my predicament have either been lynched or put in jail

This is my point ...Nobody CAN OVERCOME addictions by their own efforts. You need to cry to GOD and he will help you through the holy spirit.

ChildOfDoom:
A popular Nigerian pidgin adage goes: "Pikin wey go get head, na from small dem dey know".

it's been 7 years of waywardness. no sign of me changing my obnoxious lifestyle. I'm even getting worse. it has gotten to a stage that my life and health is being threatened.......

Go on your knees and cry to GOD. If you are yet to know Christ just read these words out and you will be saved.

"LORD Jesus I come to you this moment and I accept that I am a sinner in dare need of salvation. I accept you this minute as my Lord and saviour and I ask for the help of the holy spirit to help me overcome all addictions in my life. Thank you Jesus for saving me"

With these words you will be liberated and even if you still find yourself struggling with those addictions, don't give up but keep calling on the help of the holy spirit and you will be surprised that you will so much hate the addictions.

You can't do it by your power..no one can except by the help of the holy spirit.

All the best.

Jeweltz:
Maybe you've been closing your eyes and missing shots

I think I am not just the flirty type of guy and my priorities were so parallel to finding romance.

Jeweltz:
the bolded is true. I don't know why I allowed and still allowing myself to be manipulated by him. Anytime he came around with stupid sob stories, I foundry myself believing even when I know he's a chronic manipulator. I don't understand why things have to be that way. The Truth is he's got a lot of girls he's exploiting on the constant

What is your zodiac? You sound like a cancerian or Scorpio lady.

Jeweltz:
28 last year

Oh I See, I guess you are in the realistic age gap for purposeful relationship.

Jeweltz:
No. The guy is now acting good and he's actually a good person just that he was going through a lot. I'm trying to reason with him.

Also, I've been trying to pull this post down off nairaland but I've not been able.

Thanks

You have been quoted so no need pulling it down except maybe you contact the mods to help you do that.

The story sounds so unbelievable cos in naija it is very difficult to see a lady that will be so magnanimous with money.

By the way what is your age bracket?

20 to 25
26 to 30
Above 30..

Just curious.

Jeweltz:
You have a point. Good morning
How are you

I'm good. Thanks.

Sometimes i wonder how I manage to stay clear of nairaland beautiful babes despite my years on this forum.

Jeweltz:
Good afternoon my fellow women,

This is going to be a long Post

Kindly be reminded that I don't need insultive commentaries as I'm already hurt by the narratives I'm about to share . I only need an advise. Google search lead me to this website few hours ago.

I have been into many relationship in the past with guys that their behaviour and way of life are nothing to write home about. The last straw that had the camel's back was the one that made me gave up on men to focus solely on my career. I was disvirgined at the age of 22 by a guy who I gave 100% love to.

It happened;

Sometimes around last year, a friend of mine was having her birthday. She was a colleague from work. I work in an audit firm in Lagos, VI( identity witheld). I didn't plan to spend the night there, but as it happened to be on a Saturday, I didn't have any objection when she asked me to spend the night in her place.

About 7pm in the evening, we decided to go out and chill which will be funded by her boyfriend. It was there I met this guy, which was a friend of the said boyfriend. Talks run into talks, he seemed like a perfect match for me and I was already getting used to him. I liked him.

Few days after,he asked me out which I found nice and cool.

Later, I got to know he has no job and has been into some side hustling all the while. I had no problem with this.

Months later , he started requesting money from me which he claimed went into settling some debts. There was a time I collected salary, said he needed 130k, it was so hard but I had to give him. All that I wanted is his happiness as he claimed he needed money for some hustles.

To cut the story short;

He told me his Love for Virgin girl and how he can Never marry a girl that's not a virgin. I asked him what if I'm not a virgin, he responded in the negative and I started getting nervous about us. I knew I'm not a virgin but ..........

He has been pestering me for sex, which I understand it's not a big deal. But the conversation we had about virginity has been making me scared of losing him. What if he dump after sex Just because I'm not a virgin. My mistake was that I had lied that I am Virgin. Didn't know why I had to .

I have resist all his attempts to have sex with me. Few days ago, I saw his chat with a girl which he's been going out. He had sex with her. I confronted him and he denied. This has make him to be ignoring me. He's not picking my calls, barely reply my text and if he ever, it's only one word and boring. But anytime he needs money from me, he call me.

Last week, he told me he needed money but I refused him. He started cursing me on the phone and vow to call it quit with me. he's still yet to respond to all my pleas.

Ladies in the house, what have I done wrong??

You made this story up I guess...

Jeweltz:
I'm sorry but I can't pump ass. For what? . I'm okay like that, so if he don't like it, he should just swerve

Can you now see the point? To me your backside is very ok and somewhat above my preferred type of ass yet another guy sees it as not big enough.

Outward beauty is very relative so just pray your man prefers you the way you are.

Jeweltz:
Sexy? Not as sexier as me tho

Sexy is relative and what one man sees as sexy can be a turn off for another man but it is a good thing to appreciate yourself.

makydebbie:
The man must have a big prick to handle that ass tho.

You are so so spoilt.

Any average schlong can do the work if her ass is the soft type.

Btw I don't know what guys see in big backside cos it is a turn off for me.

rosalieene:
female first borns actually

Yeah! Very strange. And the males take after their mothers.

But why do female kids usually look like their dads.

Who pays $1500 for arranged marriage?

rottennaija:
That's misplaced priority. First of all, how will they test the efficacy of their discoveries? And how will they know it works unless the have an infected patients or the sample of the virus to test it with? How will they get the virus sample to test? You will end of having people who work for their selfish interest thereby working against the interests of the general public.

This is an unworkable solution.

Why not call for the assembly of the best scientist and biochemist in Nigeria, give them a good lap, feed them, provide 24 hrs electricity with the best electronic gadgets and laboratory equipments and have them work together towards having a solution to the virus?

Common, who advises these people self? They need better advisers.

You will be shocked to know there are many in Nigeria already infected.

See as his running mate kill his destiny

The legend has gone home.

In about 80years from Now, hardly will anyone reading this post of mine will still be alive.

Let's live to please GOD.

Now they have coined a new word for them..BANDITS.

Odiegwu

Amakavula:
I noticed this a lot, like Nigerian men are petrified of pretty women.

Been on dates were the guy stammers for hours.... another one where the guy's hands keep shaking like wtf..

I noticed guys are afraid to approach me; like you see them gathering and planning who would come talk to me, but none ever grew enough courage.

Took my friend's sister to an audition once ( cos I drive) and all the dudes where just saying hi like over 10× and smiling sheepishly without one with enough courage to talk. Even the one that tried struggled.

Is this a self esteem issue?

Well I don't know your definition of "a beautiful lady" but beauty is relative and whilst you may think you Are beautiful, you may not even be considered as one by some men.

If that your dp is you then by my reckoning, you are below average no pun intended.

I can say you are pretty but being called beautiful has to do with not just the face but curves and character must be balanced...maybe when you grow olderwith more conspicuous curves you will match up.

McCoy662:
Good morning Nlanders, I have this very issue bothering me. I have been in a relationship with this girl for about 3 years now. I love her so much, and she loved me until of recent when she told me that she's no longer interested in the relationship. She told me the stern truth that she was seeing someone else.

It's not like I don't take care of her, because I have given her almost everything she requested from me. I bought 90% of her clothes myself as she can't even buy for herself if I give her the money. I pay her bills too.

Just about 2 months ago, the said guy called me and told me that his gf (my gf) said I'm her ex, and they are now together. This guy is not that rich, he's just on average income scale, he's not super handsome and the worst is that, this girl calls and comes to my house for sex anytime she feels like. But that's all, we are not friends like before, we don't go out together, she don't even oblige my requests anytime I ask her for anything. She doesn't even visit on a regular except for sex.

Right now, I'm fed up; I'm tired of being in this love triangle, though I love her so much.
My guys advised me to beat her up and warn her never to come close to my house again, but I just can't. Though I feel used as a sex object, but I just can't say no to this girl's request.

I don't just know, am I being stupid?? Is there a Best way to handle this in a more diplomatic way?? I really love this girl.

You are technically finished.

How can you still love such a lady who is dating another guy yet still sexing you? Are you Ok?

Macsjebs:
Guys, we need to be open minded, do more reading and research...Things have been happening on earth millions of years back.

We were not informed how long it took before GOD created earth but we know it was a total of 6days.

A day in heaven is like 1000years on earth says the bible so let's say GOD CREATED the beasts on the 4th day "of creation" which could be several days(thousands of years earth calender ) after the 3rd day of creation.

Very deep I know.

PregnantlySingu:
2 months. Everything still fresh. Still grieving. Worst we didn't even get a complete body to bury.. Everything burnt to ashes! jesus

Don't abort the baby. GOD WILL compensate you. Trust him

Interesting thread. I go cool down read am from page to page...very busy at the moment.

boladale123:
. Please why is doggy the most dangerous style,I need to know because that's my style??

It exerts too much pressure on your spine and if you are not careful, you could fracture your penis cos in this position, the man exerts a lot of power into his thrusts, which can take a wrong turn if he gets careless.

joey150:
Do you get to pick and choose? Is Christianity not a white man's religion? Since you subscribe to it, it's only common sense that you regard it's teaching which says you have to wed in it. If not, you're just a hypocrite.

If you think the traditional rites are fine, when the same traditional rite asks you to contribute to a sacrifice or bow before a god, do you do it? But hey, it's wedding rites are supreme just because 'you don't have money'.

So it's time for the wedding and suddenly you want to damn the 'white man's religion'. Then when you need
help or 'miracle' you run to the same white man's religion?

This hypocrisy is our number one setback. We aren't just very honest or upright people willing to see through things to the end or completely abide by them.

Look it's okay to not have money or be broke, what's wrong is trying to irrationally justify your decisions based on them.

And where in the bible was church wedding mentioned.

Bro abeg let it pass. G night

joey150:
But you are using white man's type of phone and technology and religion and government and everything.

You black people are perplexing!!

Did you just write this? Comparing technology with tradition. How pathetic.

partnerbizn3:
Oga there are no conclusive studies that licking pussy is safe. It has been linked elsewhere with cancer.

When you lick or eat Titi, caro, Nkechi ...you must get cancer but if you do it with your wife and she is clean you can never get cancer. If e dey give cancer I for don get.

lalasticlala:
Y the delays most times in updating the homepage?

Wow! I just checked this thread I created 6years ago and it gladdens my heart that you commented. Guess you were not a mod at this time. Nice one

Influential101:
You ain't even married yet and you're already bringing your issues to the public.. Kindly go and sort your issues with your wife (to be)..

He is very married. Read again.

He is only complicating issues for himself by opting for a white man's type of wedding when he is not even financially ready.

sylvestersamuel:
Good morning my fellow Nairalanders, I will try to make my story brief and precise.... I have a fiancée whom I am already engaged to. As a matter of fact I have already done all our traditional marriage and rites the only thing left is our white wedding which will be coming up in the next 3 weeks.

Yesterday, my fiancée came to visit me in my house so as to discuss our wedding plans. But before she left, we had a slight misunderstanding and the reason for our misunderstanding was because I allocated 50% of our wedding expenses to her i.e (she would be the one to sew her wedding gown, pay for the catering service amongst others) while I take care of other expenses...

On hearing this, she didn't even utter a word but left with annoyance, since then I have been trying to call her but she hasn't been picking my calls neither have she replied any of my messages....

Please I need your advice, did I do or say anything wrong, because I know how much I spent during our traditional marriage rite and mind you, she earns close to 200k per month.... Insult in form of advice is allowed all I need is just your advice.

Why did you agree to having a white wedding in the first place? Is trad wedding not enough?

Bros solve the problem you created biko