₦airaland Forum

Mine wasn't too long ago. They called me and made me an offer. The first time they called, the job wasn't remote and I wasn't interested in changing jobs then. Six months later, they called again (a different position). This time, the country was already on lockdown, so I started off working from home just like everyone else. Then I realized I liked it (as going to the office would require me changing cities), so I told them I'd like to keep it that way regardless of the status of the pandemic.

You guys arguing with the OP must have a lot of time to waste. Lol.

Always about women.

DashDolls:
Check the Edited. And kindly work more on your research skills sir. It will do you a whole lot of good.

Lmao... please, stop wasting people's time.

This explains the dynamics between some girls and thier more ambitious or advanced boyfriends. Lol.

Dtruthspeaker:
Sweet, Fair and Reasonable Analysis especially the highlighted which directly answers the Ops question.

They are not really in query as to if they believe in Prayer/God but the question was "do they ever pray in the face of adversity"

And by your answer, you show that a Prayer or 2 leaks out of their lips even if involuntarily!

Well... yes, you could actually say that. But is it really a prayer if it's not from the heart? What difference does it really make? It's just like any other exclamation to such persons with no religious significance, one they grew up using. I honestly don't think there's any point to be scored here. It's just like asking an ex Muslim why he still has the black dot on his forehead if he doesn't believe in Allah anymore. These things don't just disappear regardless of your current religion. Again, I said "most people... " and not all.

@gmail.com?

Lol... I wouldn't even forward this to my enemy. No offense intended but given the situation of things over there, invitations from anonymous and unverifiable email accounts are red flags. Especially when it says "oxfordprovidencephoenix@gmail.com" and the Oxford Global Resource we know is in Providence, Rhode Island, USA.

I believe most people who grew up in religious environments have the tendency to say or, at least, muter what could be akin to words of prayer in times of distress. However, this isn’t necessarily because they believe in any suprem being but primarily cause human beings are creatures of habit and the way you express shock remains fairly the same regardless of your new found belief. Some people might keep repeating "God, please, no" whenever they are in distress or scream "Jesu!" when in shock, and that wouldn't mean they acknowledge the existence of God (they barely even think of what they're saying). It's just how they've grown to express fear or shock. Such utterances don't make the person less atheistic, and it’s definitely not something religious people should hold on to as a sign of supremacy. It's simply human nature, and religion is supposed to be a thing of the heart.

Kill all your women! After all, you're stronger and they are useless!

Your mother's maiden name isn't always a security question. Sometimes, it's for a more unique identity. The likelihood of someone having your first name, middle name, surname and mother's maiden name is almost zero.

Kandeed:
Lol see campaign tactics....well over to the gullible Nigerians

It a very good way to campaign if that is what it is. Voting for someone whose handiwork you can see isn't gullibility. I don't know what else you want to influence your vote if not such.

You guys and your sensationalism though. He said many things and only used that statement to emphasize how the parents of the kidnapped kids must be feeling.

Qwertyuiop1:
La Buena whatever is a big scam, every one should know already but how did you arrive at this flawed statistical bullshit?

^{Do you know that if one person starts a network marketing in a binary system and each person signed up brings 2 people every month, in 36 months, there should be over 68 billion people in the network. What is the population of the world?}


If one person starts a network marketing and the person brings 2 people every month, how on hell would it fetch you 68 billion people in 3 years?

@bolded: You lack decorum; quick to call someone's work bullshit and yet, here you are making a fool of yourself.

Samirana360:
U chop ur lesson fee for mathematics

The funny thing is that he wasn't even polite with his response. Calling the guy's calculation bullshit, yet he doesn't have a clue.

No sense was made.

Always use condom. Don't infect people's children with STDs.

bercarray:
If not for the way things are been done, we've been made to believe that fathers pay every single bill in the house, getting married with 60k isn't bad, provided my wife will be working too, and also we'll be working towards increasing our income too along the line, because along the line responsibilities will come; kids, school fees and all. But as it is now that it's the men that will take care of everything, even if madam dey work, they will keep their money saying father should provide, don't even try to settle with that amount. But if it's both parties that are contributing I see nothing wrong in that.

You are right. But that works smoothly if men will also participate in running the home (chores, cooking, etc.). Insisting women should do all these simply suggests you're willing to take care of the financial part.

ShadowCracker:
cc: woundedlamb can you now see that not only Nigerian men are capable of perpetrating disgusting inhumane acts.
Violence is not synonymous to a particular gender.

It's not. That's a point we all need to always remember especially when we are tempted to type "fear women".

HitGuy:
Not so fast, girls who put guys who is desperate into friendzone & milk them dry buying all mannerless sort of expensive things, don't give nice guys a chance & still won't let them go either, my point is, there is no need of him marrying the girl, the guy should ride on with the money, if the role is flipped, the girl will not never refund the guy, so i don't see no wrong with the guy walking away with the money & dump her ass.

You are wicked.

Wow... I don't really think the reasons you gave for believing that thread has to do with you are strong enough. The child is a boy; well, it's got to be either a girl or a boy. He was born four years ago; so were many others. But then again, that part wouldn't be difficult to verify. The person that created the thread can easily tell by asking you a few questions. And if you happen to be the father of the child, I'd say it's a good thing you get to share your own side of the story.

I commented on that thread and I liked the idea that the man was considering taking in the boy legally (having a legal father is important) but I also told him he might not be able to do that without your consent. I'm not sure how it works but I'd surprised if the adoption papers can be completed without your signature. But bear in mind that if you don't want the man to adopt the boy legally (i.e. if you block the process by exercising your right), you must be sending in money for his upkeep (at that point, it wouldn't be a son you don't know). I doubt you would have any legal grounds to take the kid away from her mum.

Good luck!

Buzx:
Great! I just wanted to make sure you had no gender bias or prejudice. I'm actually sick of the way males, boys, and men are treated in our society today.

Situations are usually turned against us when a female is involved. If the reverse is the case, the females are pitied, and you'll hear things like, "Leave her, she's a lady.", just like how people were screaming, "She's a woman" in the video. You see people in the comment calling for the guy's head, and saying," He deserves to be shot." "He should be beaten."

The question is, will they say the same if it was a lady? Why do we feel assaulting a man is fine, but not a woman. Shouldn't both be wrong?

Both genders should be treated equally. What's good for the goose is good for the gander. Cheers!

Hhmm... I am man and having lived 'all my life' in another man's country where I am the minority, I clearly understand the need for equality or equity as the case may be. But do you really mean what you just said? Do Nigerians really want that? Do Nigerians really want gender equality or is it that when we talk about situations where women get pity (mostly physical abuse), we say women and men should be treated equally. But when it comes to other social issues, we remember a man and woman can never be equal? I do not come to Nigeria often but judging from what I read on here, I believe women even have more reasons to seek gender equality in Africa.

Permit me to share with you: if she's rich and single, she's ashawo. If she's hit at home, she doesn't bring peace of mind or talks too much. If the husband cheats, she should understand men are naturally polygamous. If she's raped, it's cause of her dressing. If she sacks anyone at work, women are naturally wicked. If her boyfriend leaves her, the guy is "my G" for using them girls. If she's a leader, she must have slept her way through. If she's a celebrity, she's a prostitute. If she has issues with another lady, women are thier own problem. If she does nothing, Nigerian girls are useless, all of them. It's as if we are the saints who never do wrong and even when we do, we reconfigure the women to live with it. It baffles me how Nigerians criticise ladies for sleeping around while hailing men for doing the same thing. Who do they think the men are sleeping with? Dogs?

So you see, while agree with you that women should be held accountable when they abuse people physically, I also believe that equality should be extended to other aspects especially those aspects that require cultivating positive mindset.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

SmartyPants:
I have never said he was morally right. But who are we to judge morals? I might not react the way he did, but I may not rush to condemn him either.

Was she right to hold on to him? Was he wrong to react violently? Is one wrong more wrong or less so? Even if such standards exist, can we arrive at a conclusion from the video alone?

Anyway, i suppose we can agree to disagree.

Point is, not all reactions are justified by the actions that led to them and this guy's reaction is one of those. Even the law isn't that mechanical. I wouldn't be surprised if the guy is expelled.

notok:
There is nothing wrong about his action , laws don't care about your feelings.

You know little about the legal system. Don't make the mistake of believing you could just anything cause you're on your right, the law isn't that mechanical. Not all reactions are justified by the actions that led to them.

Buzx:
Quick question: Would your stance be the same if it was male lecturer holding a female student and she was hitting his hands to break free?

Like I told the other guy, actions lead to reactions but not all reactions are justified by those actions. Lecturers have no business getting physical with students and if the lady were the one who resorted to that, she wouldn't be right. But then even that wouldn't justify her students hitting her especially if she wasn't hitting him. That guy was extremely violent and it sadens me that you guys aren't seeing that.

Now to answer your question, any female that raised her hands to hit her lecturer just for the mere fact that he held her clothe deserve to be expelled. You can refuse to move, you can hold his hands and try to pull them off, you can scream at him to leave you. But if you start hitting him, that wouldn't be an equitable reaction and you'd amazed at how easy it is to move from the right side to the wrong side. Don't believe you could just anything cause you're on your right, the law isn't that mechanical.

SmartyPants:
Not sure what you watched either. he was clearly hitting at her hands in order to break free. He is at least entitled to proportionate self-defence in law, if not in morality.

What we saw there is a boy doing his best to get free of a woman who is dragging him. We don't know who assaulted the other first, but it is very likely, given the belligerent nature of that woman, that she did.

Further, I am at a total loss as to how you arrived at the conclusion that:

1. She was holding in him in the manner of one saying "you must kill me today"

2. That she is old enough to be his mother

The video does not show the start of the confrontation, nor can we see the faces of the people involved to tell their ages. So you have added in these parts in order to complete your theory, which is directed by the headline you read, and the shouting of the people in the background. Wh btw, merely said, "she's a woman".

Against his backdrop, if you claim that she held onto him in the stubborn manner of one who says"you must kill me today", then you at least agree that she was the one holding on to him.

Now if she is holding on to him because he attacked her, she is entitled to her defense. But if he is resisting her for holding on to him, then he is entitled to his defence. So can you eliably inform us of who initiated the contact? No you cannot. Therefore you have little basis for forming the conclusion that you have.

Yes, she was clearly holding onto him but violently attacking someone who is merely holding on to your shirt is hardly admissible as self defense. Self defense against what? A hold? Would he hit his mother like that if she held on to him? Would you be saying all these if the lady was your mum? Ok, let's not even play the victim, would you be proud of that guy if he was your son?

Sir, even a killer could get away with murder provided you know which part of the law to quote but then we all know what is morally right. There might be actions that led to certain reactions but these reactions aren't always justified by those actions. Assuming he held onto the lady's hands and struggled to pull them off his shirt, we wouldn't be here discussing this cause that would have been an equitable reaction but he was hitting her. And you called that "doing his best to get free"? That's a very cold thing to say and only someone who's desperate to vindicate the man would describe what we just watched as that. You can stick with the law but this, right here, isn't morally right. And I'd be shocked if you don't see that.

As for your question, I said she was holding him in such a manner cause that's what I saw. She wasn't hitting him, was she? And if you had read my response a bit more carefully, you'd see where I wrote "a woman who appears old enough to be his mother". The key word being "appears" which indicates I don't know if she is or not. I never assumed her age nor added anything to the story other than what I saw. I do not know what happened before the lady held on to him (though it's unlikely that would be her first move) but judging from the part I saw in that video, that man was extremely violent and I'm almost certain those close to him would be disappointed.

Plead:
@woundedlamb @Ishilove

Read this and also watch the videos properly, cuz it seems y'all females on this forum attach unnecessary sentiments when commenting.

I'm not a female and if you can't logically present your argument without resorting to gender dichotomy, then you're clearly the sentimental one here. There's no place on earth where what the guy did is justifiable. He was very violent.

SmartyPants:
Yes I knew this would play on people's minds. In fact, the mods have phrases this headline in order to trigger the memory of that incident and draw a parallel, thereby causing you to sub consciously link the two events.

Yet, one would watch that video from beginning to end and all you will see there is a young man who is being assaulted by a woman who refuses to let him go.

He does not once strike her body but merely attempts to break free. Now to test your earlier position, if the genders were reversed who would you blame in this situation?

No sure we watched the same video. The guy was hitting her. She held on to him just the way weaker people in Africa would while saying "you must kill me today". Nevertheless, that's not enough reason to hit your lecturer who appears old enough to be your mother. You think he was just try to free himself and people were shouting "she's a woman o"? Dude, he was hitting that lady.

I'm surprised to see people justifying this.

Ah! Did y'all see the way he was hitting that woman?? Where are these people raised?! After someone would say "I'll send my kids to Nigeria so they'll turn out fine". The only things kids learn in Nigeria is to tolerate violence and possibly become violent themselves. I hope the guy was expeled and imprisoned.

omazus:
Is he still a student?

I guess we all know the answer to this question. Lol.

festacman:
Pastor T.B Joshua sent a clear condolence message to G.O Enoch Adeboye on the death of his son. But the reporter managed to add "However, Adeboye has publicly said in the past he would not worship in Joshua’s church". That's unnecessary mischief there.

Did Adeboye really say that?