5minsmadness's Posts

Nairaland Forum › 5minsmadness's Profile › 5minsmadness's Posts

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 ... 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 (of 187 pages)

Family › Re: Could This Be Love Or Child Abuse? by 5minsmadness: 6:21pm On Dec 13, 2014

You must be very stupid to ask this question!
Not everybody is dirtyminded angry

Family › Re: OMG! Proud Mum-to-be Shows Off Her Pregnancy Stretch Marks by 5minsmadness: 6:19pm On Dec 13, 2014

[size=5pt]It looks very sexy to me oh [/size] embarassed

Family › Re: . by 5minsmadness: 5:05pm On Dec 13, 2014

stylesco:
Goodmorning All

I'm not in the habit of sharing my problems online but I just want to be sure I'm doing the right thing.

I crave your indulgences.

I know they say no one is perfect, that's why I'm asking the married folks in here if maybe I'm asking for too much.

My boyfriend is the best person to be with when he's not angry.
He's very caring,loving and generous.

But when he's angry, he finds it very difficult to control it.
He talks to me with so much disrespect.

Most times he apologise afterwards.

Recently he did same again and I said I've had enough why say terrible things to me just because you are angry.

And he thinks being angry justifies it and I should deal with it or walk if I want to.
That that's who he is and he won't apologise for it neither will he change.

Honestly I don't know if I'll be doing the right thing if I leave.

I'm I asking for too much from him?

Yes you are making a mistake!

It should be "Am I making a mistake?" Not "I'm I making a mistake?" Gerrit?

You are also making a mistake by bringing this problem online. Half of the people giving advice aren't even married!

People say nasty things when they are angry!The idea is to hurt that person as much as possible at that point in time. It is a stoopid thing to do because words once spoken can never be taken back!

However some folks are very forgiving. If you can accommodate this kind of person and understand he didn't really mean to hurt you, then go ahead with the relationship. But if you can't handle it...! Heh! If you cant handle it then run oooo!!! Before the person becomes your permanent mate!

The question on everybody's mind here is...Does he hit you?? If he does...sista...RUNNNNN like Usman bolt or is it Hussein bolt? Run fast oh before you and the dentist become good friends!(unless you don't mind violence in your relationship...some women are kinkkky that way...its a free wold

)

Ayyaf tuk ma owhn!

Family › Re: Woman Asked To Have Sex With Dead Husband by 5minsmadness: 4:38pm On Dec 13, 2014

People will believe anything.

1 Like

Family › Re: View Point: Feminism Threatens Marriage And Family Values. by 5minsmadness: 4:34pm On Dec 13, 2014

cdz:
The problem with feminism is feminists. They come across as bitter, reactionary, intolerant and rude - sometimes. Ask them what feminism is and they tell you it's a crusade for the equality of the sexes. But then what is equality? Before I am misunderstood let me say this: men and women are equal. Men are not more human than women. And fundamental human rights are men and women rights. But again, what is equality?

Feminists tell you that equality means treating men and women the same. And I say that is injustice. Men and women are equal but certainly different - and difference here is not a bad thing or a superiority contest for no man can be a woman and no woman can be a man. So let each be proud of what they are.

Equality as defined by feminists is unjust and no one (not even men among themselves or women among themselves for that matter) is equal in that sense. For example, if you have kids and they are all boys, will you for the sake of equality serve each of them exactly the same portion of food? It is not rational to do that because obviously their needs vary where quantity of food is concerned. Some naturally require more food than others and it is only fair that each person is served according to his need. Because the kids are different, they must be treated differently. So it is also with men and women.

It is rational to reserve physically demanding tasks for men not because they are better than women but simply because they are naturally wired to cope with such tasks. Why? I don't have the answer. Perhaps nature is to blame. In the same vein women are more naturally suited for certain roles. For instance, I am personally more at peace with a female nurse than a male nurse - their touch is unparalleled.

Being a woman has its challenges but don't be fooled into thinking that being a man is a joy ride either. A woman who is fed up with being a woman has the option of becoming a feminist at least. What option does a man who is fed up with being a man have?

I once heard a man lament that if the challenge he was facing was what it meant to be the head of a family, he wishes to declare the headship of his family vacant and any woman was welcome to apply.

How can you possibly know what it's like to be a man except you are one? Remember, the grass is greener on the other side - until you cross over. A woman's life is hard; a man's life isn't any easier. If you don't agree, please show me where in this world men may have an easy life just because they are men and I'll send more than a few male friends there to find peace.

Beautiful post.
So on point.

2 Likes

Literature › Re: How To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse-shorts By 5mmadness by 5minsmadness(op): 2:27pm On Dec 13, 2014

haydot95:
that's more like it

Ejọ́, Emabinuụ́ cry

Literature › Re: How To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse-shorts By 5mmadness by 5minsmadness(op): 2:06pm On Dec 13, 2014

Pickabeau
Victoriousvic
MrsBreezy
Kachisbarbie
Khalessi
CopyNG
Giannakopoulos
Odward
Timothy3113
Stormybucci
Ciela
Ksslib
Missmossy
Miss.terious
Joywendy
Missyhorlah
Jossi994

@all am very sorry for my.long abscence
work tie me down no be small. I know I deserve to be hung by my toes and flogged cry

Abeg make Una no vex. I'll be updating daily now till the story is over.
Tanchu saas and maaas

5 Likes

Literature › Re: Nairaland Poetry Club Chatroom. by 5minsmadness: 2:00pm On Dec 13, 2014

Greetings, disciples of this great art.
I would love to participate in your craft
For beyond the world of letters and pen
Lies an elite, a group, a special den
They spin their words to and fro
And mightily conquer every soul
For nothing is as pure in scribble art
Like a poet, an artist in love with his art.

Even if sometimes I dey craze grin

Na dis kain thing dey make me faze cool

I don tell Una, make I no bring out the badness angry

You sure say Una go fit hol 5minsmadness? undecided

Na joke I dey joke abeg no vex shocked

All Na poetry and relieving of stress! cheesy

2 Likes

Literature › Re: Compilation Of Short Horror Stories by 5minsmadness: 1:45pm On Dec 13, 2014

Interesting story. Pls space your paragraphs.

Literature › Re: How To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse-shorts By 5mmadness by 5minsmadness(op): 1:40pm On Dec 13, 2014

Literature › Re: How To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse-shorts By 5mmadness by 5minsmadness(op): 11:36pm On Dec 12, 2014

“Who the Bleep are you guys?” the Zombie asked.

Silas was so shocked. If his mouth could drop any further it would have hit his kneecaps.

“You can TALK?”

“Of course I can talk, what about you, can you think? I doubt it.” The Zombie said.

Dr Burke came out brandishing a handgun. “Drop it…Holy shit!”

“Finally, someone I can communicate with.” The Zombie said and smiled. “Hello Burke.”

“Stephan? Is that you?” Burke said, lowering his gun.

“In the flesh.”Dr Stephan nodded. “Although my flesh seems to be falling apart these days. I see you have acquired some deadweight. Should I dispose of them?” and he aimed the shotgun.

“No! No, don’t do that. They are…colleagues.” Dr Burke said.

“Definitely not smart colleagues,” Dr Stephan said, “This one let me sneak up on him and disarm him. What’s your name, son?”

Caleb looked embarrassed, “Caleb. I’m Nigerian.”

“And I’m from Puerto Rico but that doesn’t make me immune to being zombified does it?” Stephan smirked.

“Does anyone here find it remotely insane that a Zombie is having a conversation with us?! Anyone?” Silas finally screamed. He had been trying to make sense of it all; here was a shuffling, half decaying bloody zombie in their front speaking and no one had mentioned it yet.

“I am not a zombie! Just some of my experiments gone a bit wrong.” Stephan said.

“This is Dr. Stephan, part of our research team. We were working on an antidote for the zombie vaccine when the apocalypse hit.” Dr Burke said.

Dr Stephan lowered the gun and extended his hand to Caleb. “Pleased to meet you. And I’m not really from Pueto Rico.”

“I’m not touching you.” Caleb said. “It’s against the rules.”

Dr Stephan paused for a moment then threw his head back and laughed. The laugh shook his whole body and for a moment Silas thought his arms were going to fall off.

“You gave them the rulebook did you?” Dr. Stephan said. “Good for you, Burke. You were always one to follow the rules.” He turned to Silas. “And who is this?”

“Erm, Silas.” Silas replied.

“Where have you been, Stephan?”Dr. Burke asked

“Over in the Zombie room, working on an antidote. I daresay I’m almost there, though I have been having a shortage of test subjects and catching stray zombies was getting to be too risky…”

“So you started experimenting on yourself?” Dr Burke gasped.

“So I started experimenting on myself.” Dr Stephan nodded.

“You can’t stay Stephan. You’ll contaminate us all.” Dr Burke said.

Dr. Stephan snorted. “I’m this close to getting a vaccine that will save all of humanity and you want to throw me out? No sir, I’m staying right here. And besides, the zombie room has been overrun by zombies. I barely escaped with my life.”

“Wait, you keep calling that place the zombie room, where are we then?” Silas asked perplexed.

Dr Burke sighed and turned to him. “I told you this was the Alien invasion room. You thought I was joking, didn’t you?” He turned back to Dr Stephan. “You’ll have to stay here in the outer room then. The rest of us will be inside. But be warned, any funny moves by you and I’ll shoot you in the head myself.”

Dr Stephan grinned. It was a horrible grin with one side of his face drooping as if paralyzed and bloody spittle dripping out of his diseased-looking mouth. “Thanks Burke,” he said. “You always did know how to give reassuring speeches. Now, do you have any raw meat in the freezer? I’m hungry.”

Family › Re: View Point: Feminism Threatens Marriage And Family Values. by 5minsmadness: 8:02pm On Dec 12, 2014

Let me answer you calmly before a more violent person comes along cos I can see from your post you know very little about feminism.

FrancisTony:
What I could deduct from your post, is that any rude, nagging, misbehaved etc woman is a feminist.

That's your deduction. I never said that.
Also rude,nagging, misbehaved etc are all your words and not on my post at all. So tell me what you saw in my post that made you say it is 'beclouded by hate'.

That's because most women can't do without a man. They don't have future.

You just committed blasphemy according to the feminist handbook. You should be hanged by your patriarchal domineering balls and flogged. Most women cant do without a man? Really?

An industrious woman won't bear 'bully' as a husband.
Trust me, your deduction is mainly prevalance in Africa because of our primitive nature.
A white woman wouldn't think twice to divorce him and get her own share.

I have counselled at least three Caucasian couples(not my fault, could have counselled more, blame racism,but that's another story) and I assure you that the story is the same wether in 'primitive' Africa as you say or in the U.S. The woman is usually more patient than the man even when its so easy for her to get a divorce. I will accede though that the African woman is more patient than their white counterparts.

My last statement means that feminism doesn't equate men haters or woman that's not submissive.

Submission is an entirely different thing. A feminist can be submissive too, and last time I checked, dictionary defined it as women who claim gender equality not unsubmission.

Lol.
Naive statement.
True feminists are anything but 'submissive'. The word itself cancels out the very foundation of feminism. Coogar and maybe crackhaus will explain this last part better to you. I've lost interest in those kind of battles.
If your friend is 'submissive' to her dominant husband then she is not a feminist.

4 Likes

Family › Re: View Point: Feminism Threatens Marriage And Family Values. by 5minsmadness: 7:38pm On Dec 12, 2014

bukatyne:
Weldone

You have not gotten to me sha.

Keep it up, you will see happy ones.

I would not be surprised is your feminists are wives who are rude, not helpful to their husbands, believe they are equal and believe husband's money is our money and wife's money is wifey 's money

Irrespective of feminism or not, if a wife is not a good one, she will not enjoy her home.

I still opened a thread on foolis.h wives/woman some days back.

I see nothing to disagree with on your post.
And yes I read that post on foolish wives/women. Very interesting.

Family › Re: View Point: Feminism Threatens Marriage And Family Values. by 5minsmadness: 7:31pm On Dec 12, 2014

FrancisTony:
Lol! Your post is beclouded by hate.

What of most relationship that crash when the man is a bully?

Are you saying wicked wife is associated with feminism?

By the way, I have met a Feminist who defined it more than being submissive.

Pls state clearly what in my post is 'beclouded by hate' huh

Strangely enough a relationship will last far longer when the man is a bully than when the woman is overbearing. It does not mean the man should remain a bully and ideally he should be counselled. It simply means women are more patient and forebearing.

No I am not saying a 'wicked' wife is associated with feminism. Stop trying to twist my words with your own warped ideas. I am saying a woman that starts to behave like a man in a relationship rather than the woman she was naturally meant to be ends up making the relationship miserable.

I don't understand your last statement at all.

Family › Re: View Point: Feminism Threatens Marriage And Family Values. by 5minsmadness: 7:13pm On Dec 12, 2014

bukatyne:
Lol! @ your last paragraph

You must done one hell of a survey.

Weldone

Yes I did. A very extensive one. Took me more than two decades to complete. Its called the survey of real life experiences.

In all the marriages I have come across and all the couples I have counselled(yes I counsel couples) I am yet to see a happily married feminist. Men are naturally dominant and once a woman try's to assume a dominant role in a relationship it always crumbles.

4 Likes

Family › Re: View Point: Feminism Threatens Marriage And Family Values. by 5minsmadness: 6:19pm On Dec 12, 2014

OliviaPope:
The OP is confused.

Nobody said Marriage was bad.
Marriage is sexist.
Sexism involves TWO sexes.
When two people of the same sèx decide to get married, equality wouldn't be an issue

This is where you are so wrong.

Before you say anything, I have encountered a lesbian couple(though not in Nigeria). I can tell you right now that one of the females was the dominant partner while the other was submissive(playing the wifely role and allowing the other make most of the choices).

If the dominant female happens to be a wicked and domineering person then the submissive female will still suffer and we'll be right back in square one. The real solution is to teach the dominant partner the right way to handle things.

Feminism is of the devil, don't be deceived by its 'noble intentions' packaging.

6 Likes

Family › Re: View Point: Feminism Threatens Marriage And Family Values. by 5minsmadness: 5:55pm On Dec 12, 2014

yungcyrus:
me for anything biliv in equality, the way sum men are treatin their wives all in d name of marriage n religion is demeaning...

Small time una go say eating CARROT is a sin...

So go to the source of the problem. Teach the men to be real men; responsible, loving, supportive, custodians and protectors of their families.

Making a woman change her nature from kind and caring to selfish, self-centred(this especially) and un-nurturing all in the name of feminism is not the answer.

I am yet to see a happily married feminist.

7 Likes 2 Shares

Family › Re: View Point: Feminism Threatens Marriage And Family Values. by 5minsmadness: 5:13pm On Dec 12, 2014

dre11:
That's one of the end time works
Since marriage is the first institution that GOD did proclaim to man and the oldest.....
So, a way to get man to loose focus is to destroy that institution and make it useless there by making man fall Grace to grass

Without the institution of marriage, children are going to grow up without any form of love or authority. This will lead to a rebellious generation. The women are already rebellious and bringing chaos. The children will follow. And mankind will fall.

3 Likes

Literature › Re: My Flash/short Stories Collection by 5minsmadness: 5:09pm On Dec 12, 2014

Good job, and no grammatical blunders either! That's a huge relief grin

Family › Re: View Point: Feminism Threatens Marriage And Family Values. by 5minsmadness: 1:40pm On Dec 12, 2014

coogar:
you mean feminism is the devil?

Correction.

Feminism is from the devil.

38 Likes

Family › Re: View Point: Feminism Threatens Marriage And Family Values. by 5minsmadness: 1:29pm On Dec 12, 2014

Once again, the devil at work through his associates. Destroy marriage, destroy the family unit, destroy mankind.

8 Likes

Food › Re: Pictures Of 'Delicious' Insects Consumed By Nigerians by 5minsmadness: 1:12pm On Dec 12, 2014

TheRealMrStan:
[img]http://conjamon.files./2013/11/red_palm_weevil_larva.jpg[/img]
Palm Weevil Larva: Consumed largely in Bayelsa and other regions in Southern Nigeria.

The palm weevil larvae is the most delicious!

Harvested fresh from the stalk of the palm tree, it is carried to the kitchen while still alive and then cooked in a dry frying pan.

The heat brings out the larvae's natural oils and it literally frys itself. A seasoning of local spices can be sprinkled in for added flavour although not necessary.

This wonderful delicacy has a chewy slightly oily texture and is eaten by holding the hard head and chewing off the soft body although some die-hards eat the head as well.

Nutritive value: Omega3 fatty acids(good for the heart), vitamins A and C and a good source of protein.

1 Like 1 Share

Food › Re: Pictures Of 'Delicious' Insects Consumed By Nigerians by 5minsmadness: 1:10pm On Dec 12, 2014

NOBODY eats cockroaches in the south!

Literature › Re: How To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse-shorts By 5mmadness by 5minsmadness(op): 11:47pm On Dec 11, 2014

next update tomorrow.

Literature › Re: How To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse-shorts By 5mmadness by 5minsmadness(op): 11:47pm On Dec 11, 2014

Close it back! Close it back!

The thought ran through Silas’ head like a siren. He ran back to the chair and felt frantically for the lever and finally finding it, he pushed with all its strength but it wouldn’t budge.

“Why is it still open?!” Caleb shouted, keeping guard at the door.

“It’s stuck!” Silas replied in alarm, sweating profusely. He pushed as hard as he could but the lever refused to give. He tried pulling but that didn’t work ether.

“I can hear a noise, Silas something is coming round the corner!” Caleb shouted.

“Stop shouting then! You are attracting them gaddemit!” Silas shouted. He stepped back again and examined the lever carefully. There didn’t seem to be any trick to it, it looked like a simple lever. So why wasn’t it going back?

Caleb appeared in the second room. “where’s the shotgun?” he hissed. Silas picked it from where the doctor had dropped it and handed it to
Caleb who rushed back outside.

“Wake the doctor! Ask him how to fix it!” he shouted as he left.

Silas turned to look at the doctor’s sleeping form. Damnit, why did fate seem to always be on his side? He went over to the fridge and brought out a bottle of cold water and returned. He observed the doctor for a second, and then splashed the contents of the bottle on the doctor’s face.

He jumped to his feet, gasping and coughing.

“What happened?”

“The lever behind the sofa got stuck.”Silas said, ignoring the earlier details. “Can you fix it?”

The doctor readjusted his glasses and went to the lever. He grabbed it, pulling it upwards and backwards, then forwards and downwards. It slid back into place and they both heard the door slide shut.

“Whew,” said Silas. “That was close.”

“What the hell happened? Where is Caleb? Wait…did Caleb punch me?”

Silas suddenly became uneasy. Caleb hadn’t replied all this while. He put his finger to his lips and motioned for the doctor to be silent. Dr Burke’s
eyes grew wide and he looked around for his shotgun but it wasn't there. Silas tiptoed to the entrance and peeked into the room.
What he saw made his jaw drop open in amazement.

Standing in front of him was Caleb, his hands high in the air, the shotgun on the ground. Holding a gun to him was a zombie.

2 Likes

Literature › Re: How To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse-shorts By 5mmadness by 5minsmadness(op): 11:42pm On Dec 11, 2014

“Come on Caleb.” Silas said. “It’s time to hit the showers.”

Caleb “oohed” and glanced at his clothes which were covered in zombie spittle and slime. He stood up and followed Silas to the bathroom.

“Leave your contaminated clothes in the bucket labeled “red”. I’ll dispose of them. There are fresh clothes in the wardrobe as you are well aware.” Dr Burke said.

Silas and Caleb did as they were told and Dr Burke wrapped the clothes in a red cellophane bag and went to the first room. Looking carefully through the cameras and making sure the coast was clear, he opened the door and threw the clothes outside. He went back in and then closed the door.

Silas and Caleb were soon out and in new fresh smelling clothes. Dr Burke nodded appreciatively and for a moment there was an awkward silence between them.

“You are going to have to drop the gun sooner or later, Doctor.” Silas said, looking pointedly at the shotgun Dr. Burks still held in his hand.

Dr Burke looked down, “Well, I forgot I was still holding it. Sorry.” And then he put it down. Immediately Caleb rushed him and punched him hard on the face. Dr.Burke promptly fell over and passed out. Caleb turned to look at Silas.

“I agree he had it coming.” Silas said. “However, he is the only one who knows completely how this room works, not to talk of his information on this crazy zombie virus. We have to find a way to work with him.”

Caleb gritted his teeth but said nothing. He calmly picked up the now unconscious doctor and laid him on the sofa in the second room.

“So you think he still knows something about this our small zombie fortress than he is letting on?” Caleb asked.

“Yup.” Silas said looking at Dr Burke thoughtfully. “And the truth is, even though he is a jerk, if I hadn’t broken the rules we wouldn’t have been in that ugly situation.”

“If you hadn’t broken the rules I and my crew would be part of the walking dead by now.” Caleb replied. “Thanks man.”

Silas grunted and leaned back on his chair. He felt sore after the battle they had just had and wanted so much to rest and lie down. He reached behind the sofa under the table and found the lever he thought was for reclining the chair. He pulled it and they both heard an ominous whooshing sound.

“What was that?” Caleb gasped and both men jumped to their feet. They rushed to the first room and froze in shock.

The door was wide open.

1 Like

Literature › Re: How To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse-shorts By 5mmadness by 5minsmadness(op): 11:35pm On Dec 11, 2014

ok am done. I will be updating daily until the story is Finished. Sorry for the long break in transmissions.

Family › Re: Why Do Divorce Laws Discriminate Against Men? by 5minsmadness: 11:03pm On Dec 10, 2014

bukatyne:
Lol!

Poor devil who is smoking weed in Jamaica!

The things some people do amaze the devil himself.

The heart of man is desperately wicked.

laugh all you want, but its the truth.

1 Like

Family › Re: Why Is MARITAL RAPE Considered To Be A CRIME? by 5minsmadness: 9:04pm On Dec 10, 2014

coogar:
i would rather be labelled as an unfaithful husband than be a marital räpist. had hilary clinton claimed to have been raped by bill clinton, he woulda gotten 200 years imprisonment as a president. not even monica lewinsky's semën-stained blouse dented clinton's credibility.

All I'm saying is that its quickly becoming a lose-lose situation for the man. His wife refuses him sex (because its her body blah blah). This of course places the man in a precarious position because he still has the strong urge for sex. He is tempted to go outside and if he gets caught he is blamed for everything. The wife quickly demands a divorce (its the reigning thing now, divorce at the slightest provocation....makes me wonder what love is all about in the end).

It still boils down to the devil's plan. The bible admonishes that the woman should not refuse her body to her man and the man should love his woman. The bible teaches unselfishness.
The laws of the west are quite the opposite. They teach selfishness. Your body is your own. Put yourself first. Put your happiness first. You alone are number one, think of no one else but yourself.
This reasoning is going to be mankind's undoing.

Family › Re: Why Is MARITAL RAPE Considered To Be A CRIME? by 5minsmadness: 8:13pm On Dec 10, 2014

AfricanApple:
rape is a crime against humanity no matter who you are doing it to. the fact that i married to you do not give you the right to force me when I don't want.

your wife refused you sex all the time, go eff someone else, thats tit for tat

And the moment you do that the wife screams infidelity and asks for a divorce; then blames the man for being unfaithful.

Family › Re: Why Is MARITAL RAPE Considered To Be A CRIME? by 5minsmadness: 8:02pm On Dec 10, 2014

Mondisweets:
Marital murder should not be seen as a crime since the wife has rights over her husband's body as he does hers

Like, how can you compare murder to sex? Do you hate sex that much?

Family › Re: 15 Items That Can Save Your Family’s Life by 5minsmadness: 7:51pm On Dec 10, 2014

Nmeri17:
condoms

Ain't this the truth grin

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 ... 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 (of 187 pages)