₦airaland Forum

Just hope and pray that thats all there is to the relationship - roommates.

Cause its kinda hard sharing a room with a guy and not feeling for him, afterall you see him all the time.
Personally, its not what i would advice.

But maybe she had her reasons for doing that.

@adeboo
the way i see it, she was the one always running to him (even when he never called). the kind of girl whose friends just know she has a boyfriend, but no idea of what he looks like.
[quote][/quote]Rite, i really understand now.

I remember when i was like that - oh boy do i remember

IBB Fan:
in 2007, are there still men that splash cash, gifts, trips et al and don't get a piece of that booty?

If its a good piece of booty and worth the hassle then why not if they have the cash to spare.

As long as you are still only dating.
You both havent entered into any sort of agreement yet asper relationship wise.

And as long as you dont sleep with all of them.

Am so sorry oleofhearts (thiefofhearts).

Well if he introduces you as his cousin then u should do the same and see how he reacts

Thanks alot people. I know that i definately cant change a man.

I really appreciate the advice. Am beginning to come back to ma senses now.

I say Pele for the simple fact that he is still actively participating in the game.
He still can play ball even though he is an oldie now.

Thats so true Creamish - thanks a great deal.

Thanks for bringing me back to my senses.

Maybe you should train to become a mid wife or train to work in a creche.

But at that age its way too young to have a baby - you miss out on so much.
Maybe you should get one of those dolls that are like real life babies and they cry and do things real babies do.
Then after a while see if its what you really want but personally, have a support system e.g emotionally (family) and financially.

thanks uchetobi.

i understand what you saying i have thought of the same thing maself.
I actually have a child maself and am usually one that wouldnt date a man that has numerous baby mamas but you guys know how you just come along and change evrything - especially when he is what you have been looking for.

Damn why cant life be so straight forward.

A relationship is a two person deal.

If he isnt willing to pull his weight and has given up on it - then i would probably be put off.

It totally depends also on how long the relationship has been for.
And if he is someone i see as a keeper then i dont know how far i would go.

Totally depends on the length of the relationship as i said earlier.

A relationship is a two person deal.

If he isnt willing to pull his weight and has given up on it - then i would probably be put off.

It totally depends also on how long the relationship has been for.
And if he is someone i see as a keeper then i dont know how far i would go.

Totally depends on the length of the relationship as i said earlier.

Dvampire:
it all depends on the mess he is in (would help in the assessment if you'd give us a little detail of what it is). because some mess take long term to correct while others take long term.

Well he has two kids from two different mothers. One nearly ten and the other just two.
According to him, he said the youngest one wasnt really 'planned'.

I really like him and at thispoint in ma life, am not really ready for anything long term either but i just wanna know if he is taking me for a ride or if he is someone i could truly invest my time and effort in

I remember doing that when i was younger, and when ever i did that it just meant i didnt like the guy and wanted to get rid of him.

That could be the case.

@ Creamish and dremoney - i am just voicing ma opinion as in what could be the problem why guys dont wanna date pretty ladies.

Its what i have seen and witnessed before.

Now guys please help me out.

Met a nice guy, ideal and definately my idea of my dream boat.
The thing is that he says he isnt ready for anything long term yet cause his private life is in a mess and i know for a fact that his private life is in a mess and he likes me (he told me that) and i like him too.

His reasons for trying to sort out his private life is most definately valid.

But the thing i wanna know is - is he likely to change or is he leadingme on.

P.S. I think he is genuine but maybe my judgements are blared.

Well in order to live at peace in the home.
They are better off attending the same church.

Thats just one of the things to consider when you wanna settle down with someone - it should have been dealt with before it got to this stage.

lilian777:
It could be that you are ;

a, usually surrounded by the same kind of people since you were 14 till date.ie places you find yourself at

b, Sending the wrong signals unknowingly ie like 'come -get-me' kind of message, What kind of clothes do you wear?

c, The kind of choices you make as regards to relationship

d, Too friendly with the ones you shouldnt be too friendly with

e, saying yes when you mean no( As regards to your present realtionship) You shouldnt be dating people you don't like

f, what is your major reason for being friends with a guy anyway?If a guy feels you are taking advantage of him,he may want to get even by sexually harrasing you or otherwise. The Ego thingy, don't you think?

g,Or, it could be that you are just DAMN too SEXY for them guys. you know ,like 'too hot to handle' and 'too cool for comfort.'

Am with ma girl on this one.
You really need to check yourself and if you feel that you have honestly been faultless and blameless in this whole situation, then you need to deal with the situation spiritually.
You may not know it but you may have a seductive spirit aura around ya

ThiefOfHearts:
Not sure why you would want to stay around someone who is obviously ashamed to out right call you his "girlfriend"

You deserve better than that you know. Let him and his dumb friends do whatever they wish. let him go. He obviously didnt care for you much in the first place.

I am so with my guy on this one.
If he aint proud to say he is with ya then you should be too proud to be with him.

But really i have been to events like these and the excitment of the moment just takes over you.

Really, i dont know who to blame. Was there supposed to be an age limit there?
If no, then how was he supposed to know that she was under age.

If you volunteer to go on stage and dance then expect whatever they throw at you.

I still wanna see the video to make a better judgement.

I didnt see the video - where did it go?

Another thing is when women think just cause a man is a 'born again' that doesnt mean he is a good husband material.

Like its been said, why do men feel they have to fool women into believing they are something they arent.

I totally agree with what the poster said that - when a man starts calling you a pet name after a few days thne he is a phony.

Sometimes the so called 'pretty ones' are so full of themselves that they chase guys away.
They fill they are too good looking for certain type of guys and hence end up single and rotting away on the shelves.

But men like low key , low maintenance ladies and the not so pretty ones are like that.

Alot of people have spoken very intelligently on this issue.
And i liketo think that we have lots ofmature minded peopleon this topicin particular.

First of all in finding a rite partner, you have to decide why you wanna get married or what your expectations of a relationship are.

Like its being mentioned earlier, you really need to be whole, complete in yourself before you look for a life partner otherwise your judgements will be blurred.

Definately we need to pray for our Abba Father to guide our thoughts but our Father can only go by whatever we have in our minds thats why its very essentila to be grounded yourself before looking for a mate.

Dont just say the Holy Spirit will do it, God isnt a magician and we have our own parts to plan and we need to shine our eyes.

And dont be fooled by any brother or sister in a church that tells you stuff - shine your eye, and dont be fooled.

Well traditonally its supposed to be the guy.

Personally, i would probably do the calling after a day (am not really traditional like that) not hearing from the guy- especially if its one i really like and i see as being a potential.

But after that first call, then its up to him to call me after that and in order for me not to be temptedto call him again, i get rid of the number.

I call him dad - when i want something
Father - when we are arguing

Its a difficult situation cause nobody wants to be rejected.

So for starters, ask someone that knows him if he is single or dating someone.
Then if the coast is clear, just speak to the guy on a friendship level (start fom there).

Then see where it goes from there.

Like Seun said, as little as possible.

Its really tempting and we kinda get caught up in being young that we forget that we have a future ahead of us and unfortunately the things we do in our young life kinda has a way of catching up with us.

Nope i dont think you did anything wrong.
I feel you should stop trying to contact you cause its clear to see that he doesnt wanna keep talking with ya.

So i say move on and find another thing to focus your mind on.

A bowl of Special K cereal with a tall glass of Orange juice and a banana.