₦airaland Forum

Dupalmer:
You see why everyone is different. Some people are humbled by peace talks why some take advantage of peace approach.
soem people get mad at violent outbursts and nagging while some get disciplined by it. Couples should know whichever works for their spouse.

Do you know if peace talks was not working for the man before so she decided to change her approach?
What if op is the type that is very stubborn and both peace talks and violent approach dont work until you do something drastic like leaving the house for him?

SALTandFIRE:
Please who has that picture of CaptainMitch and a minor with gap tooth in bed...
200 naira transfer to anyone who has it

Happy Christmas

What was he doing with the minor?
Were they in suspicious positions?

Dupalmer:
.
A virtuous woman could have called her husband to a peaceful dialoge rather than rant with angry words. Believe me a peaceful 5mins counsel could have been mightier than 2hours nagging.
It's not everyman that stands nagging.

When you remember how nice your woman is even when you offend her you'd make it a point of caution not to imagine offending her. Making her happy will be your top priority but when she wants prove rebellious my dear forget it.
If she Wan go let her go.

This is fallacious

People have a tendency to take advantage of those they perceive to be weaker than them. I have seen sadistic people who started behaving worse when their victims approached them with humility, these sadists started respecting themselves only after they got served a good dose of their own medicine.
Some people don't respect people pleasers, they will try to take advantage of them more.

Op is not telling the full story
I want to hear the wife's side of the story too
Maybe op did more than slap, maybe he added a few blows or few derogatory words but unfortunately the wife is not here to tell her side of everything.
Maybe their marriage has been rocky for years now or maybe he has hit her before, who knows?

In any case, contact her with written and signed agreement the you will never assault her and if you do you will be arrested, that should be in the contract.

I am sure that one will be enough to convince her of your remorse

Bye

blank:
I'm just wondering. How will the expensive gifts you want to buy for him make up for the parental neglect you suffered from him? He had a disagreement with your mom and decided to take it out on the kids by not providing for them? Sounds like a douchebag. But what do I know?

@bold,
Na real wa

Leave them to continue blaming their mothers for everything
Ungrateful souls

Graxie:
This is why I hate single motherhood, I can never raise up kids by myself alone except due to widowhood. God will not even allow me to be one. Every single mother should read this thread and wake up, you will raise this kids alone and they will go in search of their father. Some will even claim you manipulated them. Wake up and seek for child support from sperm donor, even if it means going public. Don't waste your life for nothing. Better still, go and drop those kids for your sperm donor family. Be wise.

This is exactly what I was thinking while going through this thread,
See how I felt cold while reading the justification these people gave for their fathers behaviour, they cannot control their urge to blame women for everything.
They agree that the father maltreated mom but are now twisting it by saying their mother manipulated them into being on her side, she nagged, she did so and so
Can you imagine the ungratefulness to the only parent who was there for you through thick and thin?
Go back to your dad if you want but dont be unfortunate by bad mouthing your mother for your dads bad behaviour, even if she did the nagging and emotional whatever you people are claiming THAT DOES NOT JUSTIFY your dad abandoning you. He could have gotten family to mediate, he could have separated from her but continued to show interest and concern for you.

But here you ungrateful brats are, after your mother raised you you want to still blame her for your dad abandoning you.


I really pity single moms raising boys, if they know what is good for them they will try as much as possible to get support from their sperm donor because men will always support each other over women no matter the rubbish the other party does.

I am very sure Op's dad is rich because he mentioned the man building houses everywhere. Maybe he wants to have a taste of his dads wealth that's what is really fueling this reconciliation and bad mouthing his mother.

ibkayee:
SCREAMING

If guys had the same 'opportunity' to 'who.re' themselves out for money the way they're always steady yapping about the way women do they'd hop, skip and jump at the chance.

'oLoSh0' indeed lol

They are just jealous, that's their problem. They wish they can do it like women

Boringdraw1:
"A key that opens many locks is a good key, a lock that opens for any key is a bad lock."

A pencil that goes into different sharpeners eventually becomes a worthless pencil

The truth is, many nairaland guys are already making enquiries about how true this story is. Googling frantically and opening different sites to confirm and praying its real.

But they have no problem calling women hoes and olosho and sluts.

If na man dey do am nothing dey, but if na woman then she is all the rotten names you can think of. Foolish hypocrites

But seriously so many men are heartless beasts sha o, how can you be living life day to day knowing there Is a child out there that belongs to you and that you are neglecting? But you continue to still neglect that child?

How do you animals even sleep at night?

Some people lack manners and common sense

This thread could have been a great Avenue for people to learn from others life experience and make decisions for themselves
Somebody even said he learnt that teenage girls need attention and hands on parenting which is a positive lesson to pick from this type of thread

But alas the epidemic of women bashing in nairaland has ruined a good thread again. Even without monetary benefits a thread like this is valuable and those sharing stories should be welcomed and treated decently, and encouraged to hang in there for their kids, never neglect then for any relationship and so on, because they are survivors and it isn't easy for anyone to come forward and tell a story with such a sensitive topic.


So many foolish people on this site I swear.

To all those who shared stories,
Iyatola
Blazing12345
Mumnatasha11
Desan
Steveofu
Purpletee
Hamachi
Others,
Sorry if I forgot to add you,

May God give you strength to carry on and raise your kids, bless you with money and emotional stability and goodhealth, give your kids a very bright future to bring smiles to your faces in old age and as a reward for your hard work.
Amen

uboma:
Wow!

The op has deactivated her handle.

Too bad,



@Op accept my sympathies, may God restore peace and love in your marriage amen.

Mindfulness:
Learn to please yourself and not others. People don't respect people pleasers because people pleasers don't respect themselves.

That's one thing Nigerian women need to learn, instead of swallowing all sorts of nonsense in the name of submission.

Submission even to a useless man that contributes nothing to the home.

cococandy:
So people can just decide to physically abuse others because they are going through stuff?

Nairaland men lack common sense

Look at how they are justifying a man beating his wife because he is going through hard times
If a woman is the one hitting her husband and slapping him whenever she is angry you will see them foaming in the mouth and calling her insultive names and asking why can't she solve her problems instead of frustrating her husband.

cococandy:
That’s why sometimes you don’t just read pass.
You call that BS out and move on.

People who don’t know Nigerian women would be pleasantly surprised when they actually meet one after only reading about them here on NL where we are only good for nothing .

It's good to call out BS just that people like mrbrown whatever dont like admitting they are wrong even when it's clear as daylight. If you get power for am them no wahala, continue talking to him.

This thread is filled with extreme introverts and socially inept guys.

Imagine getting angry because one time like that woman no gree give you sex, as if she is your sex slave you bought from one sex slave market. Or deleting her number because she doesn't relate with you the way your narcissistic self expected her to relate.

I pity for una, carry this your mentality into marriage and see how badly your marital life suffers. That's if you people can even sustain a long term relationship that leads to marriage.

Anytime your wife annoys you just delete her number or ghost her, it's the way to go for alpha males, dont ever change, you hear?

This is a good thread Op, thanks for speaking against the negative labeling some women unfairly face in their daily lives.


If men don't like the topic they can start their own topic and speak against negative labels men get.

@liberalchic, fiery, fountainofyouth, cococandy,
Mr brown Jay doesn't live in Nigeria, he's basing his posts on the misogynistic posts nairaland small boys write about women bringing nothing to the table.
Make una no mind am

Mindfulness:
Don't challenge them to do it if you don't want to have an accident. Ask them to set up a piece of furniture and the shelf will fall on your head. Then they will brag how they can paint the walls ... dude, I did that in my student years already in my first apartment.

House, cars and money when some nursing mothers can't even rely on their husbands to cover the hospital bills or simple medication. Abeg! Which country are we talking about? No money, no skills, no intellect but discussing how a woman's only purpose in life is to serve them. They won't lift a finger around the house but then ask you to contribute financially. The audacity!

Seriously, I don't understand why Nigerian women dream of marriage to these men. Brain washing at its best leading to self-destructive behavior.

@bold, na that one naim worse pass.

They just want to go out and come back anytime they like but women must cut off their own heads to please them.

Many of them don't do jack financially, they spend money on sidechicks and abandon their children but their wives provide money and keep silent out of shame and because she wants to bear Mrs.

1. Plan money down to do DNA test after she puts to bed.

2. My own opinion is that your contraceptive didn't work, the bleeding she experienced is likely implantation bleeding which takes place few days after unprotected sex and marks the implantation of the egg in the womans uterus, that bleeding usually marks the official start of a pregnancy. You need to realise that not all contraceptives work and in fact if you fail to take contraceptive pills within a certain time frame, they will not work. Postinor 2, for example will not be effective 72 hours after sex. I dunno about other pills.

3. The doctor that told you she was bleeding because she was pregnant is a real definition of quack doctor. He didn't do any type of test but just looked at her face and concluded that she was bleeding because pregnancy. No be everybody wey dey answer doctor get sense oo. Some contraceptive pills actually cause bleeding like someone said before.


4. She is 4 weeks pregnant, not 6 weeks. Ultrasound results always add 2 weeks to age of pregnancy, it's always plus 2 weeks, not minus 2 weeks. To be 100% sure go for DNA test before concluding that she cheated on you and abandoning the baby.

Shashar:
A word is enough for the wise

Keep your advice to yourself

Shashar:
Pls allow your pussy to rest,ashawo no be work...#Look for a job

You sef dey stay for house at night instead of going for armed robbery every night. Armed robber no be work.

#dont get lynched after you get caught robbing.

Harlequeen:
I am not under 25 sister, and your christian dogma won't sit with me. If i do become 35 and remain unmarried, i have decided that i will live life, adopt a child and get a boytoy. I have tasted what it is like to settle for a random guy(to be egging on a full grown man on what to do like his mother). Will never go through that again.
But thanks for your opinion but i will be avoiding Shiloh like the plague.

@bold
Many of them are blockheads that dont listen, that's how they get married and retard_ their family's progress with their lazy and stubborn natures.

I know one like that, an old family friend, he' very jobless but will remain inside house 24/7 waiting for his wife to hustle and bring money because he knows she won't let her kids starve. When they married he was doing uber work before his car got stolen and since then the guy packed up and refused to be useful to himself. If the woman tries to convince him to start up something he gets angry and starts frowning face as if she is disturbing him.

Housework he no dey do, money he no dey bring, he doesn't even go job hunting.
Just waiting for woman to feed him everyday.
Na that kain man woman go poison out of frustration people will start saying she is very wicked.

Harlequeen

In threads like this many men will come and tell you to lower your standards and settle for broke subpar guys, infact you will see hundreds of likes on such idiotic posts but when a guy starts a similar thread to this one his fellow men will come in to encourage him and tell him to marry financially independent woman and avoid broke leeches. Somehow it's ok for women to settle for useless guys but men must marry quality women.

My dear find a man you like and will be happy with, go into rich circles, they are there, you sound like you are staying with the wrong crowd, hang out with those who are wealthy and established, up your fashion game, wear neat trendy and classy clothes, shoes and hairdo. You can join a club where rich people are much, find one in your town.
Dont knock down the option of marrying an African American or a Nigerian based abroad who wants a wife, try and find these people too. And widowers too, try them.You sound like you are not so outgoing, sorry if I am wrong.

Ask your friends to connect you if they know any guy with your criteria.

A very extroverted girl will have no problem finding a rich guy to take care of her, I see them everywhere here in my state, even girls that are not so good looking have rich, hard working and established men paying their bills and keeping them in money while in relationshils.

healthserve:
Bruhahahaha S.M and funny e-fights sha. Nice one. I'll clap to this one.

Lol. My belle o

Who is fighting this one? Mtsheew

healthserve:
Yawns. We know your kinds. My words are priceless. I won't waste them on you

But you quoted me to post your words naa........



Oga unfollow me if you no like my posts abeg, I can't be dealing with your emotional heartbroken posts everytime you see me write what you dont like.

For heavens sake what type of question is this thread asking?
Society and religions determine gender roles in marriage. When you have the bible saying women should submit and be home builders while men who can't provide are called infidels what on earth do you think people will subsequently regard as their roles in marriage?
Gender roles are even stricter and more defined in islam where a woman can divorce a man for failing to provide for her and a man can beat his wife for not submitting or pleasing him.

Of course women in such societies will look for men who can provide because they see it as what God ordained while men look for obedient submissive housebuilding women.

I dont know why a lot of men like being willfully ignorant. Buharis economy is hard and you want financial support from women its known but make una sofri dey deceive yourselves.

skales67:
Fine! Now kindly go and die somewhere in agony somewhere please!

You're the one that needs to go off and die.

Stop blaming rape victims.

skales67:
I took a glance through your profile and just looking at the topics you created alone makes me know your problem so you are not even worth it!

Women like you will continue to be pained about the existence of the following phenomena "Men", "Submission in Marriage", "It's a man's world"...etc till you finally expire from High BP or other similar emotional related illnesses!

You already have enough headache being a misandrist so no need to add more pains to your frustrated and shallow "anti-male" life!

Oh...and for the record, you may as well have a sneak peak at my own profile and peruse the very first topic there! By the time you get to the second page, you'll almost take your life out of anger and shock at what I do to your fellow women as a sport!

Look at the moron_ begging for attention on his profile topics. I didn't click it, will never click it. I dont care about whatever the hell is there. That has nothing to do with this topic.

Stop blaming minors for sexual assault, it's the fault of the man, not the girl being raped.

skales67:
Traumatized wetin?
Stop trying to make this one-sided abeg!

Didn't you read the part where the girl was taken away from the vicinity and she eventually sneaked back? Meaning she was enjoying the whole thing!

Both father and daughter are animals and should be tied to a stake and burnt to death!

You are a very big fool

You nairaland men use every opportunity to blame women for your animalistic actions.

Nowhere in the story was it written that she "sneaked back" you bloody liar.

I am just tired of reading men justifying rape and molestation online, what is wrong with you people?

The op said she returned back and not sneaked back, do you know if the father threatened to stop providing for her if she doesn't return? Do you know whether she was forced to return because her real mother is no more and no body else to take care of her?
The woman in op story is her step mother not her real mother. You people disgust me with the way you can never take blame for anything, you just have to find a way to blame women even if in this case the woman is a minor of 16 years.

Stupid disgusting creatures.

olusogo1:
It seems GTbank is not even ready to participate in NTB again, 2 primary market auction without success and account officer daily saying no secondary market, may have to port to another bank.

First bank as well, this is the 2nd time they are returning my money

Lol @ topic,
I saw the original topic that a man started
These boys are jokes.
He never marry he dey find submission. If you check now he is among those that never spend on girlfriend but wants her to submit to him like his wife.
Hypocrites.