₦airaland Forum

Don't ask her out.

Don't ask an employee out unless you want it to be serious and if the employee is not wholly dependent on that job, i.e: they could easily get a similar or better job.

Ishitinyourlife:
I live in the west, I'm single and in my late thirties, I work independently I have a store/cybercafe/gamehouse where I sell electronics like home sound system, games, pads, phone accessories, mobile phones etc and I also have a cyber cafe and a game house in the same building.

I have about 6 workers that run the place with me cos I can't be everywhere at all time and the shop is a little big. Among my workers is a very beautiful 22 year old undergraduate that works for me when she gets off school and during holidays. I like all my workers and I treat them right but I'm not really a guy that gets personal with people so they know I have boundaries, but this girl is exceptional. She takes her work diligently makes even more sales than me in the shop most of the time cos she is good with people.

This girl is very attractive and she dresses nice too. She doesn't wear revealing clothes. She's modest, all calm. I used to buy food from restaurants to eat in the shop before because I don't really like cooking but she told me I don't need to do that, she can make my food and bring it over to the shop for me. Like she will bring me food in the morning before school and afternoon and she refused to collect a dime from me.

People are starting to feel a certain vibe among us cos she smiles whenever she looks at me and even my workers do call her oga's wife jokingly.

In truth I like the girl but I don't know if asking her out might cause a problem to my business.

Advise me please.

Thank you very much for this post. I thought I was running mad reading what that guy wrote.

I live in Montreal and frankly, the Nigerians here are a lot more diverse and open than in Ottawa and Toronto, especially if they don't go to Nigerian churches.

My advice to Nigerians who emigrate is to deliberately include non Nigerians in their social circles.

whizqueen:
My friend sent me this thread last night but I had too much to say so here we go.

I (A Nigerian girl living in Canada) will be responding to the OP's points and some other comments I found on the thread.


Are Nigerian Ladies in Canada lonely? Ofcourse we are! Are Nigerian girls in NIGERIA lonely? Hell yeah!!! Are Nigerian girls in other countries lonely? Absolutely!!!!! Being lonely is not a factor of location or person. It's about not finding the right friends/partner you vibe with.


Why did we immigrate? Bros are you kidding me? Canadian govt is paying me $2000 monthly and other benefits for losing income due to covid-19 Is that happening in Naija right now? All the money donated by philanthropist in Nigeria would soon disappear into the thin air without our govt giving explanation of any sort. Ofcourse, it's not bed of roses abroad neither were we expecting a man wrapped in a gift bag but please don't let your sentiments cloud your reasoning as to why people make immigration decisions abeg.


I personally feel attacked I recently posted a video on my YouTube Channel about finding love & online dating in Canada. It's asif this hope saw my video and wanted to attack me


What makes you think we would be interested in you to begin with? Don't pride yourself too much plis dear


If you like let the OP influence your decision and stop you from chasing your immigration dreams, last last it's up to you to decide what you want for your future.


Whilst I would agree with growing together with your partner and building with them. I think it's just shallow minded of anyone in this age and time to ask for women to chase marriage first before career. Marriage is not the ultimate not everyone sees marriage as an achievement. These days, if you crave for sex so much, you can pay someone to do it or get yourself a Love Machine, if you want a child, you can literally just buy a sperm and save yourself lots of stress. Most of us are yet to keep an open mind to these things, however if you want something badly there;s always a way to get it.


Most Nigerian men hate to see it happen, there are laws that protect women here and they would prefer dying single than to see women as their equals. A good number of them are control freaks and would rather their woman be at their beck and call for everything as opposed to having their marriage work as a partnership. Nigerian married man knowing the laws of the land will still go ahead and cheat on his wife with a girl living in the same condo with his wife. Una no even dey fear or respect una madam. If atall you really want to cheat, you cannot travel to Nigeria and secretly mess with girls that fancy IJGB crew or allen avenue. As expected, some women do exploit the situation but if you find yourself a god-fearing person and you do the right thing, no divorce laws or child custody issue would stop y'all from flourishing.


White men dont find us attractive? Laughs is Swahili
On the contrary most men of other races have FETISH for Nigerian girls and Black girls in general. Maybe not long term in all cases tho but they reaaaaaaally fancy us and admire our enthusiasm towards life. Whilst most Nigerian girls would likely not wanna go for the likes of 'Ryan', 'Billy' and co it's not cos we don't find them attractive. Firstly, Naija guys are smart, intelligent and goal oriented. You see the average ones already have plans for their future and working towards it unlike the counterparts who are comfortable with just a high school degree. If a Naija guy is even into technical jobs he would try to be the best at it and work towards starting his own company in the near future. Secondly, coping with someone with a different culture, lifestyle, food, etc is honestly stressful. I was talking with one Persian guy and he said before we can kiss or hold hands, we have to be temporarily married. The other chinese guy is only about 5ft tall, I'm just wondering what he would look like in that department

In Nigeria, when you visit a guy at home, some would expect you to know that's express ticket to get laid with them. But here if you visit a guy at home, you can be almost certain that if you guys have sex it's cos you wanted it, no guy will try to lure or manipulate you to straff them or tell you when you came to my house what were you thinking. They know it's important to ask for your opinion or even avoid the whole situation altogether.

Something the OP failed to address is that the Loneliness spans across both men and women living in Diaspora. Even the white people find it hard getting a partner for themselves much less an immigrant that would probably take some time to fully settle in. The system is built to have everyone mind their business, that togetherness or family-spirit is missing.

All the naija guys and ladies in Toronto have finish dating themselves. It's such a small city, everyone knows eachother thru another person only a matter of time before you find out that; the guy toasting you is ex with your colleagues' friend. Or the guy you matched with on the dating app went on a date with your housemate the day before. Some would be married and they would be on the dating apps lying to other women.

Some of us don't even mind going back home to bring men here, but 'em guys just they find paper. Only few genuinely love and care for you. I kuku know people here already do that as business tho, some ladies/guys now charge up to $30,000 to marry people from home to help them get residency here.

There are tons of Nigerians in Canada groups on WhatsApp and Telegram some are just for singles and you find people of age 35, 40, etc filled with both women and MEN. Some guys eventually resort to going back home to marry the less exposed girls, but guess what happens once they reach YYZ airport? Oh well your guess is as good as mine. Their eyes go open finish.

A good number of Naija guys are single and desperately finding love as well as ladies. Truth is, we all crave for love. And that's not a bad thing to want. Finding a good match or significant other is a honestly a game of chance. Home and Abroad, White or Black race finding a partner is truly difficult and if you got lucky finding that one special person, you better love and cherish them truly.

I rest my case; I am in the comment section waiting for someone to jump on my mention and before you do so just remember: Opinions are like as5holes and everyone is entitled to one. So this is my opinion, I have free time today

Link to Original thread https://www.nairaland.com/5782313/chai-nigerian-girls-canada-lonely

These conspiracy theories are dangerous.

Cirilla:
All this devastation could have been contained if china was honest and forth-coming with the world. .....

They have to be held responsible.
If not , they'll continue their ways. ....

Man Up , chinese dictator !
They must pay dearly. This has been costly to the WORLD. This was released from the military lab next to market. It was released to attack a certain age group. It's a designed virus. Make them pay. There is no words to describe what this country did, or should I say it’s regime! I see it as the biggest Terrorist act ever against Humanity! And the world needs to come together on it and make this scrupulous country pay! Who acts like it did nothing wrong and keeps doing what it did before! Make them pay for their gambit to become the 'one and only sun' as they recently put it, while sowing death and misery around the world. The bottom line is economic warfare whether deliberate or by allowing the 'accidental release' to spread globally for months while lying and denying They are a dangerous country feel sorry for the common people that have to live there you have a dictator in Russia you have a crazy leader in North Korea what you have in China is a leader who does not care about the people I am trying to figure out is this going to go on till we Blow each other Up Boy this is a strange World we live in.
Meanwhile the Messiah have found a cure

Our numbers water low because we aren't testing people.

We also have a culture of not knowing the cause of death. 'Sudden deaths' or 'strange illnesses' are routinely blamed on villagers, witches, the devil, our mothers in law, etc.

nsiba:
Ugo Egbujo
Let's stay strong.

We are holding up well.

And this is why.

It's been 6 weeks since the Italian came with COVID.

6 weeks after Italy got their first case they had suffered 10,000 deaths.

We have just 7 dead.

In 6 weeks, Feb 26 - March -April, America went from about 50 cases to almost 500,000 cases.

We are just at 305.

Let me bring it into clearer focus.

On February 28 2020, we had one case. America had 60 confirmed cases.

Today we have 305 but America has about 500,000.

Okay let's use Untited kingdom that is about a third our population.

On February 8, Uk had 16 cases . We had one.

Today Uk has 70,000. We have 305.

We have no reason to panic.

God is on our side but we must not let him down.

Here is why we must not relax.

On February 27 We had one confirmed case and UAE had just 13. Both countries held up well. By March 31 UAE had 611 and we had about 131.

Today UAE of about 10 million people now has 3,360 but We have 305.

Let's be careful.

On March 6, 2020 Spain had just about 365 confirmed cases. Today they have 158,000 with about 15,800 dead.

We are doing well. But we have to keep our eyes on the ball.

Stay safe . God bless you.

Happy Easter

Nigerians care the least about Nigerian lives.

A scary reality.

MelesZenawi:
Thirdly, If truly the index case is nowhere disappeared. Security should shoot him at sight anywhere he is seen. I hate people exhibiting wicked attitudes. Are you running to spread it to people instead of moving in to be handled effectively and save other lives.

That life is much better with less stress.

I will definitely reduce stress going forward.

Start working or/and doing enough business to be independent.

That's your only hope.

If your mom loves in the same city and if you're not working due to the shutdown, you and your fiance could move to your mom's house.

Since she has decided to take over your own house.

Francis609:
I will be brief with the narrative . Am 33 years old engaged to be married. I live with my fiancé in a single room ( she started living with me since February due to some issues she had with her senior sister she stayed with). We both are working , we are not financially ok just managing. My mum doesn’t like my fiancé for no reason , her reasons are , 1. my fiancé is dark skinned and ugly , she said I am a man but i looks more beautiful than my fiancé , she is worrying about her giving birth to ugly kids lol , mum preferred me marrying a fair woman like her , 2. She is not from the same tribes as her , she wants me to marry a girl from her village because she doesn’t want me to end up a divorcee like her ( my mum and dad are not from the same village , they had so many issues in the marriage that led to their separations). My mum thinks marrying her will not be a very good ideas. As for me I told my mum , I love my fiancé , she is the most beautiful woman in my eyes , she is the one I want to spend the rest of my life with . My mum not happy and still disapprove of our relationships. She was not aware that my fiancé is staying with me , it was when my younger sister cane collecting money for her school fees , she met with my fiancé and has seen some of her stuffs in the room , she went back to telling my mum. She called me shouting at me , I’m stubborn like my dad , I don’t want to listen to what she is telling me about not marrying her, she will kill me , she has said a lot , no need for me to write everything on her . Then like a week later she has came to my place with my nephew only 1 year 6 months that she want to spend time with me because she misses me , according to her she was supposed to stay for a week but with this lockdown , things did not go according to plans , it will be 3 weeks on Wednesday , the space is not even big , I have been spending the day with them and when is evening I’m squatting with friends , while I leave my mum and fiancé in the house and she had been giving my fiancé lots of problems that today she has told me , she cannot stand my mum anymore and she want to leave and go and squat with her friends , I have been begging her to stay but she refused. I really feel sorry for my fiancé , I know how manipulative and controlling my mum can be , she is the type of person that can frustrate you till you commit suicide , I don’t even want to talk about what I went through living with her , I pity my fiancé , I don’t want her to go and stay with friends , she has nobody else apart from me. My mum has 5 children and a house , I just want her to go back to her house but I don’t know how to tell her without hurting her feelings. I need help, I can’t take it anymore

If adultery is a red line for you, don't cross it!!

I don't think you can successfully keep your husband away from his child. You guys could adopt the child together and sort of pay his mother off.

If your husband keeps a relationship with the baby mama, no matter how platonic, things could get very messy very quickly.

Mavis3:
Dear Nairalanders,
I had to open this new account Because I have friends here and family members.

Please kindly advice me on this. As I am so bitter and unhappy right now.

I have been married for close to mine years without a child. I have had two miscarriages and couldn't take in again and we tried IVF once which failed.

My husband has been patient and supportive and have been wadding off any form of interference and other than that we had a beautiful marriage and close friends even think we are a perfect couple.
My pain started some months back when our pastor called me for an urgent meeting. On reaching there I met my husband and pastor told me my husband has a confession to make.
My husband told me he had an affair with a lady for a year which he ended because he was feeling guilty. But the lady had a child for him from the relationship which he just got to know recently when she called to tell him. And baby mama has threatened bringing the child to the house if he doesn't meet her demands.

He begged me for forgiveness and so did our pastor. I was heartbroken but I forgave him and took him back.
Early this morning, he told me he wants my permission to become involved in the child's life and be a father to the child.
We own a joint account and our finances is usually.planned as we talk about what we use money for. He wants us to include the upkeep of his child in our budget for each month .

I feel batrayed,angry and bitter.
I told him i will give him an answer when I am done thinking about it.
But I am not happy and I also feel cheated.

How do I handle this please?
Married folks in the house please I need your advice on this.

Pls mod, front page.

Of course.

Church friends. Business friends. Office friends. Advice friends, etc.

As long as the relationship is based on something tangible, of course.

Imogenn:
I’m wondering if a married man can keep a close female friend, who is single with nothing attached. They were friends before the man got married. They talk and gist, advice themselves, but they are strictly friends. Is this possible?

If this is back calculation, congratulations.

If she told you she was pregnant 2 weeks after you first had sex, she was already pregnant.

samwash:
My wife took in 2weeks after I paid her pride price, according to my calculations.The thing shock me self Cox I was not expecting it. To God be all the glory we have 3 children nw.

Hey, did it work? Sort of in a similar situation.

Stay safe!

tinukegal:
Still waiting for responses

If you are US/Canada based please.

If you are in Nigeria ~ please no messaging. Thanks

It's because of thinking like this that I thought funding a Nigerian life partner would be though fort me.

However, there are plenty Nigerian women who believe in equality and equity. They are few but they're there.

PrimadonnaO:
Now, I know this is going to be controversial, but I really don't care for crowd cheering. For the sake of clarity, and so everyone is able to weigh their options carefully, I'd like to state a few things.

Marrying a woman who earns is really great, it would make life a lot easier. But there are so many things you must consider.

1. Most men marry in their early to mid-30s. Are you marrying a girl who's your age mate? If she's between 22 to 27, then she's probably just leaving school or rounding off with NYSC. Excuse me, Sir, did you did you get financially stable right after school? If not, please marry your mate who's in her 30s. Oh, wait a minute, y'all call them evening newspapers!

2. Do you realise that life is in stages, and these phases come at different times for different people? So she's not earning today, is that how things will be forever?

3. You must realise that you should marry a woman who can live within your means... who can be content with what you're able to provide. Anything other than that will simply frustrate you. Why do you think you commonly find men marrying below their status?

4. No matter how much you wish things were different, women are not naturally wired to be providers. From the beginning of time, it was Adam who was cursed to till the ground for his daily bread, not Eve. That one was cursed with tortuous childbearing. So if you make a woman do the things that you're supposed to do, you'll create anarchy in your home. She'll most likely be disgruntled and it will start manifesting in her actions.
If you're tired of being or don't know how to be a man, just come as a woman in your next life.

In a house she's paying rent for you want to start keeping late nights, or having shady movements, or having her tether to the needs of all your village people who troop in by the hour. Hahahahaa. She'll throw you out!

5. Some of you men talking about the women in your offices, did they tell you they split bills 50/50 with their husbands? I have lots of female colleagues, and women talk. You guys know nothing!

6. Even if she's gainfully employed or running a thriving business, I think the mindset that she must split bills with you is a problematic one. Yes, it is natural that when she earns, she would help around with bills in the home. But don't bank on it... don't make your plans around your wife's income. A man's primary responsibility is to provide for his home, anything else is support, assistance, and you know what those words mean, yeah? If the rent or kids school fees get due before you're able to pay it, no hassles l'll pay it ASAP, but I'll be expecting a refund!
My area of support without expecting reimbursement are;
If you bring 100k for monthly upkeep, and the foodstuff or things I want to do around the house require more than that, I'll make up the balance without stress.
If the gas runs out before you get to refill, I'll top up.
I'll fuel my car myself, buy all my weaves, and maintain my wardrobe myself.
I can give my children whatever treat I feel like, make them look good, without asking you.
If the utility bill comes when you're not home, I pay up.
I buy you random gifts, and throw surprise birthday parties for you.
If you need a loan, I give to you, and you pay back with interest!
Should you fall on hard times, and your income isn't coming in, I'll naturally step up and take care of everything until you get back on your feet.

Having said all that, a woman who earns tangibly is actually doing herself a world of good. Personally, I can't for the life of me fathom why anyone would want to be a fulltime housewife. But it's not in my place to criticise. Everyone's got their peculiar preferences. I understand the need to be very much involved in my children's lives.
Actually, I'm still wracking my head on how to get around that when the time comes... build a solid career, raise intelligent and very well-behaved Godly children, look after my home and husband...
So maybe some women simply see holding a job and achieving all these as an impossible task. Some men, too, simply prefer to have fulltime housewives for their unique reasons. Each man to his own.

All the long story summarily is;
1. You want to marry a woman who's earning money... think about her age and prospects.
2. Even if she's earning, providing for the family still remains your chief responsibility. That's what being a man is.
3. Stop condemning people who would rather be, or marry housewives. It's their call. Not yours.

Frankly I don't think it's any of your business. Cousin relationships are not illegal and some places even encourage it.

How old is the cousin?

Brazil has a lot of cases.

What you're saying is dangerous.

CanadaOrBust:
It is a combination of hot weather, high humidity, abundant sunshine and poverty ( so there is not too much AC). There is no poor tropical country with much covid-19! Also there is immunity from fighting tropical diseases (we all know of chloroquine)

Sadly I can believe the story.

Many many people are not having sex.

Ginaz:
This story looks somehow abeg I can’t fit can!!

Which Nigerian man won’t know the right hole to have sex? To the extent it took you 3 months to locate the vagina. Don’t your wife know her own Vagina to direct you to it that she has to keep quiet for 3 months? Didn’t they teach you biology in school?

This story is quack on arrival . What an odd couple if this story is true!!

This kind of fake news is dangerous.


Florida is hot. Louisiana is hot. California is hot. Parts of Spain are hot.

Seun:
Effect Of Temperature On COVID-19: An Unscientific Investigation.

In the early days of the Coronavirus scourge, many Nigerians believed that we wouldn't be affected because of our hot weather. Now that we're testing people, we have seen a sharp increase in the number of confirmed cases, to about 210, which is still quite low for a country with 190 million residents. However many people suspect that the virus has penetrated our society far more deeply than the NCDC statistics suggest. We've noticed that people who travelled to colder countries recently or spend most of their time in air-conditioned spaces, or their direct contacts, are massively over-represented among the confirmed cases. Is this because they are the only ones being tested, or is heat a factor?

Here is the list of the 10 countries that have the highest number of active COVID-19 cases, and their forecasted temperatures for the day:
* USA has 257,790 active cases. The temperature forecast for New York is 8°C - 15°C.
* Italy has 85,388 active cases. The temperature forecast for Rome is 7°C - 25°C.
* Spain has 77,488 active cases. The temperature forecast for Madrid is 6°C - 19°C
* Germany has 65,309 active cases. The temperature forecast for Berlin is 1°C - 12°C
* France has 61,650 active cases. The temperature forecast for Paris is 6°C - 17°C
* UK has 34,428 active cases. The temperature forecast for London is 4°C - 16°C
* Iran has 31,954 active cases. The temperature forecast for Tehran is 8°C - 19°C
* Turkey has 20,012 active cases. The temperature forecast for Istanbul is 8°C - 11°C
* Switzerland has 14,169 active cases. The temperature forecast for Geneva is 3°C - 17°C
* Netherlands has 13,986 active cases. The temperature forecast for Amsterdam is 4°C - 14°C

On average, the top ten countries with Coronavirus have a temperature forecast of 5.5 - 16.5°C. The temperature forecast for Lagos is 26°C - 34°C, and for Abuja, it's 24°C - 36°C. This is a massive, massive difference! The maximum temperature of nine of the countries above is lower than the minimum temperature of Lagos. The maximum temperature of 7 of those countries is lower than the minimum thermostat setting of most Nigerian air-conditioners (18°C).

The countries mentioned above are in Africa, Asia or Europe. What about Africa? Here's our top 5:
* South Africa has 1,401 active cases. The temperature forecast for Johannesburg is 9°C - 15°C.
* Algeria has 1,004 active cases. The temperature forecast for Algiers is 9°C - 17°C.
* Egypt has 703 active cases. The temperature forecast for Cairo is 24°C - 34°C.¹
* Tunisia has 472 active cases. The temperature forecast for Tunis is 8°C - 17°C.
* Burkina Faso has 236 active cases. The temperature forecast for Ouagadougou is 28°C - 43°C. ^1
1 The Egypt data is misleading because the their average temperature last month was 11.6°C to 26°C, but Burkina Faso is a legitimate outlier; the country is much hotter than Nigeria.

The above data, in spite of the outlier, is enough to convince me that the Coronavirus likes cold weather and probably spreads faster in cold places, such as air-conditioned cars, offices, and homes. This, apart from the lack of testing, may explain why we are yet to see as many cases of transmission outside the circles of travellers and the rich and powerful in Nigeria as expected. It is consistent with what we know about other respiratory illnesses, and why countries like the US expect the disease to slow down in their summer season (starting from June).

When I see videos of Lagos officials spraying open areas e.g. roads & sidewalks in Lagos, I have to laugh, because I strongly suspect that, if they actually bothered to test for the presence of the virus on those surfaces, they'd find nothing at all because the sun already sterilized them.

Knowing that the virus hates our hot temperature gives me hope. If a cold country like South Korea (0°C -13°C forecast for today) could beat the virus without destroying their economy by imposing a total lockdown, a constantly hot country like Nigeria could do much better if we used the same tactics. We need to start testing people who have had close contact with confirmed cases before they show symptoms. We also need to enforce universal wearing of face-masks and social distancing everywhere, which in itself may even be sufficient to end the virus.

May your days be bright and hot. May your air-conditioners be off and your windows wide open (to get rid of aerosolized droplets). Cheers.

PS: I always make a lot of mistakes when I post long articles, so if you spot any errors, omissions, or false statements, please correct me.

I hope we know that snakes eat rats. I hope there isn't an explosion of rats and Lassa fever in that area as a result of this.

Get a certificate program in:
- Montreal
- Manitoba
- Vancouver
- Alberta

Some colleges tailor their programs around the students to allow them to work. Sometimes they compress their programs into Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays, or only weekends, etc.

Choose a certificate that is in high demand and choose a college/program that offers work experience.

Alkason:
The last time I tried their certificate Programme. The tuition fees I saw was on the high side. Can you mention any cheap college for Engineering?

Girls are disappearing anyhow. I can't blame any lady for being safe.

Don't come and lament here after the wedding and when you know her actual history or if you guys are incompatible.

HenryThegreat1:
. But she practicing no 3 on me which I'm not comfortable with that a woman I'm planning to marry don't want to know where I stay

Nothing spoil.

tehilah92:
Chai men ask for childhood photos before u marry your fellow man o, wtf!

These trans women are not attacking masculinity. Is it not masculine men that they usually get with?

AfroKnight:
Utterly disgusting bro. If only they’d do their thing and leave others but no, they attack masculinity and call it toxic because it is different from their twisted fantasies.

Don't make all this noise and then finish data upon this matter.

Chuknovski:
What a miasma, what an aberration, what level of insanity,

He's not in the country.

He has taken military flight elsewhere.

dre11:
Source: https://www.dailytrust.com.ng/fg-parries-question-on-abba-kyari.html

Something is wrong with her? People watch porn a lot.

It's not uncommon.

frozen70:
I don't think it's a good idea

Something must be wrong with her or something must have not been gotten right

Trying to change her won't do anything.

He should watch with her.

frozen70:
Why not sit her down and find out why she loves watching it

If she doesn't give you a satisfactory answer, tell her you want her to come out if it

Then the two of you will agree on a particular password for her phone so that you keep checking her phone, even if she watches and delete, she will definitely miss one or two

Then find out if she has high libido and if its something you can manage

There are a few ways to interpret this:
- she isn't being satisfied and needs porn to get herself off
- she's trying to learn more (whether to or to not improve your sex life
- she just likes to watch porn habitually

I'd advise against trying to change her. I'll say watch with her. Try her fantasies. She her your full self. Have passionate sex, let yourself go when you're with her

You can be attracted to someone at first sight but love needs a bit more than that.

Liposure:
Do you believe in love at first sight?

You can say the same about any group.

Threats in a relationship are never good. Be careful.

Personally, I don't yet know which marriage is preferable but I won't make threats in that position.

Tell him that he should be able to properly explain his position with facts, not hearsay.