₦airaland Forum

Klass99:
A very useless first son who provided no value whatsoever. Why should such a person inherit or lay claim to any properties, solely on the basis of being a first son?

We have some very messed up traditions that cause more harm than good, which need to be thrown away. Is it not men who created these traditions? Can the same men not undo them, if they really wish to?

Unlike you I mean every offence when I say (not to you specifically) that the useless first son should have stayed gone and never returned or reappeared to claim property.

What is wrong with some children sef? Are your hands broken or is your brain malfunctioning to a point where you cannot build or acquire properties of your own, without looking to grab what your parents had?

Well, the grandparents had the option to write their will if they didn't want tradition to prevail. But they didn't.

The first son may have suffered a lot of setback in SA but could not come back then. Hoping to make it one day. Like many in Lagos for years but still squatting or details.

Fiscus105:
And who told you that you can do registry wedding in ur daddy compound? So far you have money to do it.

If u give registry people good money they will come and validate ur wedding in ur daddy compound. Again we must learn how to obey simple rule.
Do engagement in daddy compound and proceed to registry/church/mosque for validation not yet reduce us as african

Nope. This is the problem, Always talk of money. I mean our traditional palaces as custodians of our culture (marriage/bride price are part of it)
Should be enough to witness it. So long they have synchronised with modern realities of govt. Simple.

boborosky:
Africans will do their wedding according to the African tradition and still do it the white man's way - total madness. Even the church certificate is not useful anywhere except it comes from the court, so why all the stress?

If we are wise, we would marry the African way and if need be, we ask a priest or pastor for marital prayer or blessings. Nothing more.

Parental blessings/prayers supersede any other.

This is where our leaders have failed woefully. Ideally, the local Oba/Igwe/Emir/duke's palace recognised by the Local Govt and Chieftaincy Affairs Ministry of bride's paternal homestead/place of marriage should play a big role. A palace official approved by the ministry ought to witness traditional marriages and issue a recognised/valid Customary Marriage Certificate. This can then be forwarded to govt marriage registry.

So that one can decades later obtain a copy from marriage registry, say by the kids or grandkids in the future.

We don't seem to be truly proud of our African heritage or take it to the next level. Eating oha or Ewedu soup, or wearing agbada or Ishiagwu is not how to be African. Anyone can eat any food or wear any clothes but not promote that culture.

But by looking at a core part of our culture and make it modern to endure into the future. Traditional marriage/bride price is part of it.

When both families have agreed that marriage has taken place, marriage is done.

That means when Bride Price is paid and accepted. O pari.

All our marriages before colonialism were done that way. Does it mean all our ancestors back then were not validly married?

Nonywendy:
I have been dating this my girl friend since 2017.

Then this last one that broke the camel's back, I noticed she traveled to the state where she did her youth service for something and all this while I thought she was staying with her sister, not knowing she was staying with the first guy she dated while serving whch she apologised. She stayed with her for three good weeks. How I realized was, I called her line one early morning arnd 3am and a guy picked the call asking me who I am. At first, I froze cos I haven't been in that kind of situation, I calmed down and explained everything to the guy, and the guy also told me she has been with her for the past three weeks and that's the girl friend too. I was shocked. I have broken up with her finally cos I don't think forgiving a cheating partner is worth it.
The first time she cheated, 90% of my friends advised me to dump her ass and move on but I had to forgive on the basis of nobody is perfect, but this third time is a no no.
Now she has been begging and asking for forgiveness that she has really learnt her lessons. At this point I'm just so mad that I don't want to forgive her.
Now the big problem is that I'm always seeing her in my dream, I have not really moved on cos it's not easy for me. I have loved her for solid 6 yrs plus.
Note: all the family members from my side and her side are fully aware of our relationship and have approved but they are not aware that I have broken up. If you are my shoes will you forgive her for this very last time or will her cheating continues?
Your advise and suggestions will be well appreciated. Thank you

Dude, first go and do a comprehensive sexual health test.
Then move on.

Forget yeye dreams.

Celepope:
This is a good development.[b] My only concern is the name. A good name for this vehicle company goes a long way in global marketing. [/b]

Let the product be good, name won't matter.
Toyota, Yamaha, Mitsubishi, Daewoo and co didn't sound posh starting out but quality took care of it.

ebijimi7:
Good morning landers, its a beautiful thursday morning here in lagos,
Ok so straight down to the business without much hassle.

she is from kwale I think a town In delta state and I am from ondo so we have been together for couple of years now.

We had a heart to heart conversation she told me about her past and I also told her about mine.

Though I've dated some substantial amount of ladies sha, I don't want to mention before una call me (Ashewo or brostitute ,

more of like she fell into the hand of bad guys.

What kept ringing in my head and making me scared was the fact she made out with some of them and I still get angry knowing that fact sometimes she would be crying that I'm using her past against her just because she was inlove and it didn't work out within she and any of her ex .

I love her but her past kept dragging me back and making me scared of taking the next step.

Not to mention all of what she has done for me but when I lost my mum she stood by me all through the difficult times she prays for me she was with me at the hospital for days until my mum passed out.

Looking at these are qualities I get confused the more because I dint know if I'm making the right decision by letting her go she rarely ask for anything

Please your candid advice I'd needed

Ok, kick her out. Then marry the one that will tell you she has had only 2 boyfriends BUT in fact has had 35 bfs and 13 abortions.

Her womb fit nor dey intact sef.

You never know ladies.

gentposh:
Pls married men in the house help him out here...

My friend just called men to as me . I am yet to reply him

OP, nor come vex us for this place o. Some people never see indomie chop, una dey mention pot of soup.

Dude on a serious note, types of soup and pot size differ. Only the Mrs can answer that question na.

harsysky:

Where person wan start to dey look this abomination of a dad. Mallet on his balls isn't enough.

But before that, we need to do DNA test if the daughter (the raped one) is really his daughter.

If it's his, mallet is too lenient. He should be sat inside conc sulphuric acid to dissolve his blokos.

Lagos to Paris.

Ticket was about 4,500 Naira. That was huge money back then.

xin5:
Please is that how it's been done? I bought a land early 2018 and now I feel like selling out. The families who sold it to me said they are entitled for their own percentage from the money the buyer is offering. Please I need to know if that's how it's done. I only went to inform them I would be handling the piece of land to a new owner and thought kola nut and palm wine would be it, since they also sold to several people there and also have some available I thought I should let them know for future reference... instead they are asking how much I am selling and wants to know every details of it.

Meanwhile the deeds that's about to be prepared would be in my name and that of the buyer, what consigns the family?

I had to tell them that's not possible it's my own land I bought from them I am selling, he went further and said it's either they buy it back from with same amount I bought 2018 or I give them their percentage from the appreciating amount or I develop and let matter rest.

Please help

You did noble by informing them but most 9ja people have no nobility in them or value it. So you must know when to show your agbero side to survive.
Just find a lawyer to prepare the documents, sell the land and go jeje. Then warn the new owner that the old owners are yeye omonile people, that he should not fall for their antics. Otherwise they will soon sell that land to another person and result in years of court litigation.

You can even say you "dash" it to a relative. They have no business knowing how much you want to sell it.

NaijaRealtor:
1. Right from when she was about three years old, she would always pray for me to make it so she can come stay with me.

2. Been married for like 7 years and we have 3 kids. My wife was on my neck to bring my niece to come stay with us so she can assist with helping to look after the kids once they all return from school.

3. Because I know how many ladies treat children that aren't theirs, I refused to bring my niece over. So after much pressure from my wife, I approached my sister and her husband and pleaded to allow me train her as she'd always prayed.

4. Weeks after her arrival, my wife started complaining about her attitude and stuff. I refused to yield to my wife's suggestions that I take my niece back. It almost caused quarrel between us.

I felt it was too early to judge her. She's just 12 years old.

Her Attitudes:

A. She would fold and keep pants stained with my 1 year old poop in the laundry basket until it starts bringing out maggots, then we would search the whole house for the source of the foul smell until we find it and throw away affected clothes, disinfect the house and all.

B. She, yesterday wiped my 6 years old son with iron buckle on the belt and his head nearly burst open. He complained of severe headache and we are still treating him.

C. Final straw was, while we were in the office today, my 6 years old started to throw up. He was sick. This girl just laid on the couch and instructed a 6 years old to go fetch the broom, mopping stick and packer to clean the mess.

My son was very weak, but he went to fetch these items and cleaning the vomit. Because he was very sick, he kept on throwing up and cleaning at the same time. All these while, this girl laid there relaxing until my wife came home and washed my son up and cleaned the floor.

When I came back this evening and learnt about the stuff, I quietly asked her why she'd behaved like that and she said it was nothing.

I really don't know whether to let her stay while I try to coach her or take her back to her parents.

I seriously need advice.

Sorry for the long epistle.

OP, how can I unread what you you wrote there?

So you and your dear Mrs, in the year of our Lord 2023, left your 3 precious little children in the care of a girl of 12 fresh from the village?
Sweet Jesus!

Haba! My brother, if you cannot get a properly trained professional childminder to look after those kids, then you have no business raising those kids o. You have not.

In societies that truly work your jail time go long like Lagos traffic jam. After the children have been taken into care by govt, of course.

Abeg do the right thing.

iammolise:
India and Arab, how many difference dey between them, they're brothers, Some Indians believe the Arabs were Indians who deserted from the empire centuries ago. One delusional Indian I know once assumed that all religion birthed from Hindu, that Hindu is the first ever religion.

Which religion doesn't say that?
Any self-respecting Oluwo or Dibia will tell you Ifa or Amadioha is the first religion. Na normal.
Our people from the Middle East will claim same, Egyptians certainly from Isis/Horus time too.

clinician2x:
Make sure your children get good education. It is too late for you but don't fail your children.

Like say dem even get better shape nyansh, e nor go too pain me.

That flat wall nyansh na insult upon injury to the dead and the living. Haba!

TAO11:
You Binis just lie to yourselves as a coping mechanism. 😂

p

-

The OP na comedian.
Adultery by mistake?

TsbAfrica:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sABwIfssp-M

Hello, my name is CAKE, and I am glad to share my workflow for character creation with you, It has been a while since I posted anything but there has been great progress since then which I will he sharing with you please enjoy. And if you like what you watch please subscribe and like so you get informed whenever we post. Thank you and God bless.

Nice

phemmyfour:
Limca n gold spot were my favourite.

Loved that India limca advert

The Zing thing.......Goldspot!
I loved Schweppes.

But Canada Dry was our local soft drink by Okada Air owner back then. Sir Chief Dr Gabriel Igbinedion.

YNWA!

Switinthemiddle:
Happy sunday y'all, so i have this issue bothering me that i need advice on.

So me and this my guy have known for some years now and i know him as someone who has a flaw for anything under skirts.

It didnt bother me all these while cause i am nt one to judge until recently when i found out from my girlfriend that he was codedly wooing my junior sister and they just started dating.

Now the problem is i dnt knw if i should warn my sister about him and try and put a stop to the relationship or just try and give him and her a chance.

Please advice

You "friend" na idiot. Your sister should be like a sister to him.

He should certainly never date her behind your back. Unless to marry.

Your sister may think you are aware and you gave him the all clear.

Unless you are also like him. Who will he hit on next? Your girlfriend?

addmole:
Why are you laughing. This is not funny. I need help. What do I do?

Look, a great deal of our women have no idea about good sex or the importance of it. Due to nil sex education. Result is lousy sex.
Very annoying.

From the background story, your wife clearly has some unresolved traumatic experience growing up. Very common.
Depression may be there too.

Quite funny how the female in-laws intervened. It appears the women in her family have no idea about importance sex as a marital obligation. But they will be the first to scream to high heavens when you cheat.

Seek counselling together if she's willing to. If she refuses to seek counselling, then she is not in love with you or never ever did to begin with. At that age 30 or thereabout, many women marry just anyone who proposes. To satisfy societal expectations.

You missed the chance to address it before marriage. Never ignore such signs.

Do you both have kids? If yes, divorce would be detrimental if all else fails.

theInfinity:
I have come to realise that many Nigerian women think that the only way for a person to prove their love is by giving them and they stylishly tag it being "caring".

Even a criminal can spend on you when dating you and deal with you when he finally marries you.

Funny, most men may not be able to give because they are struggling but that doesn't mean they don't care.

Why has friendship with many Nigerian women become transactional.

A sugar daddy can still give a lady but the truth remains that he will go back to his back at home and will never divorce her to marry you.

Please beautiful Nigerian women, let's stop making a relationship a business transaction.

In any clime without social welfare system and there is rampant economic insecurity, relationship is transactional. It's business and everything else is secondary or a bonus.
The bolded will be difficult because women are overwhelmingly economically worse off. It's about survival.

However, women with enough income can lead the way. We have to be realistic.

The problem now is even most well off ladies still feel entitled to a guy's money, irrespective of his pocket strength.

madone:
This is what I try to make men understand on this forum but most of them can't spot it.
Some weeks ago a very successful woman wanted to jump into the lagoon cos of man. That is just one out of many who have gone beyond just thinking suicide to attempting it. This is another successful lady thinking about settling down. My point still remains that being successful will not make a woman forget or kill her need of a man. Am not talking about the perverts who claim feminist online but are craving for a man's touch. My advice is this guys look beyond social media groom yourself, work hard and be ready for the future. 7 women will still say let us bear your name we don't need your money. Please guys don't die now stay alive for the future.

I thought men already knew that?

Most of those online wannabe feminists dey even house, feed and cloth one efulefu guy like that. Even if they have to collect from their "sugar zaddy" to feed him.

Not to talk of a half-decent guy that is the prize.

AllenSpencer:
Their own people failed them!

Too much lies by our foreign brothers has led many astray! Few always say the truth.

But at some point, when you tell them the truth, they will think you don’t wish them well!


Many have sold a good life in Nigeria to buy depression and frustration.

The minute I began hearing "why are you still there if UK is that bad", I stopped advising people. All I did was to make people realistic about expectations.
The next thing is for them to say you are stingy, no matter how much you have tried.

People forgot that you cannot just pack up and leave a place you have lived in for decades, with children.

9ja people nor dey hear word. Let people experience their own. They will be alright las las.

workchopNG:
I don't know if this is the right section for this topic, but then, since it's about relationship/friendship, I decided to post it here.

So, I read a rumour of how a young girl who scored 9 As in her WAEC result was poisoned to death. I can't confirm the authenticity of that story, but it took me to memory lane... Maybe, it was her best friend that poisoned her to death out of jealousy. That led me to create this thread.

Back to the topic. “It is better to be alone, than to be in bad company.” – George Washington.

I had my taste of a very bad friendship which lasted for more than 10 years. We met in school (higher institution). He approached me during my first few weeks in school, and we became friends.

He had some good sides, but the bad sides makes me question the good ones. We study and sit together during exam. We share answers codedly in hall, but I'm now thinking he might have been giving me the wrong answers while I was busy supplying him with the right ones.

All of this guy's effort was to have a better result than mine, and to make over 3.0 CGPA which he eventually succeeded at. There are times I could've gotten an A in some of my courses including a carryover, but this guy blocked it and have me got a C. I don't want to go into details.

Many things happened between us until few years ago when he referred me for a job, I got the job and was made the manager. The same company employed him a month later as a line manager. This is where he couldn't hide his true colour anymore and started being a thorn in my flesh in our work place.

Apparently he was pained that he referred me and I got a higher pay and position than he got. After many years of friendship, it was then I found out how dangerous that guy can be. I had to cut off that friendship few months into the job, and I'm never ready to have anything to do with that guy in my life again.

It's surprising how the same guy you dine with, drink with, party with, even travel to their hometown and sleep for days, has always been in competition with you without your knowledge. Such a person can kill out of jealousy.

We have to be careful of the kind of people we keep as friends. The funny thing is that I'm not even the best student while in school, why competing with me instead of the best students? Abi first class no dey sweet you Some people are perhaps and furthermore 😂🤣, even notwithstanding. 🤣😂😂

Una good morning o jare

Sorry about your experience. Some friends are more genuine than blood relatives but that's not so common anymore these days.
Sadly, the only place most friends want to see you is below them. Forget all the fake smiles and famzying.

It can be quite painful if you are the type that truly loves co-operation and everyone growing together. Not knowing that codedly, some others are competing fiercely with their shadow while you are minding your business.

But with experience, you can easily spot such people. Just be innocent as a dove but wise like a serpent around them. Otherwise, you will be painted as an ingrate. Be careful.

The guy probably only helped you believing you won't amount to much doing the job. Or there was some other advantage he saw for himself by referring you. If you now take to the job like fish to water or he didn't quite realise your ability previously, envy will grow. He will become the stumbling block and obstacle. To upstage you at every turn. It's a common thing really.

Oh, bad belle and greedy people may appear on the surface to "have more" materially or otherwise than you but they know you have some assets or attributes they will never have. Whether you know it or not.

chaiks:
I am a Nigerian and I support this. Why can't we just be careful and win England? We are too careless as a nation and we need to erase this mindset of "we tried". Why can't we just break the jinx or are we not humans like they? The manner we played England annoyed me. We should have killed that game because England weren't at their best. I am surprised they reach final.

NFF messed up as usual.

Remember the ladies nearly protested over pay and the manager told NFF hoha that they are poo weeks before the tournament.

It's fine margins in these games. A better mental fortification through a good FA can make a difference.

We had the chance to reach final this time like men had the chance in 1994.

Who knows when again?

DarkandHandsome:
Michelle Alozie is so fine mehn!!!

Well, some women still think say na by bleaching dem dey take fine.

Who don fine don fine.

Add that she's a cancer research scientist.

Hope nor be American kpale you dey see for Michelle so.

Vinnie2000:
I Just Laugh @such Pple.😏

A Man works his Head off clock the Clock and suddenly a Relative start Calling and Begging for Money.

When he doesn't Give, they say he is Stingy.😒

You, the Beggar, what have you been doing with ur Time? 😏😕

You know when people can't cheat you anyhow, they call you names.
Britain through prudence, resilience, innovation and living within their means ruled the world. Until US became a World Power after investing heavily to help Britain and Russia defeat Hitler in 1945.

Britain had to let colonies go, albeit reluctantly and focus on recovering from the war.

In 9ja, we want to live large, spray money at parties, have girlfriends all over the place, etc. We want to be brash like Americans without the enabling environment of America and means of Americans. If possible on the sweat of friends/relatives abroad.

UK functions on the foundation of everyone sharing the load, being modest and ready to manage. Even housing in a small Island is modest with 67 million people.

Anyone who has lived in other Western countries before living in UK knows the difference. How 9ja folks used your money to play betja while in other Western countries. They never appreciate what you did for them last week. Only entitlement. They don't care about you or how your family abroad progresses. Only about siphoning your money.

Anyone abroad killing himself with excessive work to please entitled people na mumu. When you kpeme, same people will say they didn't get enough rice at your enemy's burial.

UK is the best place to be to cut the shenanigans of entitled 9ja folks.

Whatever they call UK people, fact is our kids have the chance to attend some of the world's best universities. A bonus for their social mobility. No other country the size of the UK has even half as many top universities. That's worth it.

Ok

Chunedujohnson6:
It takes at least six months which is approximately 25 weeks and nothing less.

See the requirements you need to apply for your UK student visa here.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_8eIPCfi0ZA

ok