₦airaland Forum

I'm a christian because I was raised that way and that was all I knew growing up.

Train up a child in the way they should grow, ****************************

It's really easy for those people who haven't experienced Cultism in it's true form as it occurs in our Nigerian universities to come out here and start giving advices based on the ideas they have in their heads.

First of all, let me sound this, CULTISM IS BAD O!! PLEASE DO NOT JOIN!!

Now that said, Lets first of all understand that these cultist also have certain rules by which they abide. One of which is that a Cultist will not kill a jew except need be. It's not like there hasn't been instances where jews were caught by a stray bullet or something of that sort, but all I'm sayin is these cultists dont have time to waste on Jews.

I know a guy who joined after being embarassed by some little dude in a public area on campus with chicks watching.
I know of guys who joined just because their room mate is a member.
I know a guy who joined to get revenge on some cat who he had beef with.
I know guys who joined of their own accord.

The story goes on, of course in some cases you would be approached, roughened up a little or even much, bullied out of your property in some cases, told to lay off certain chicks, joints, e.t.c. but the fact remains that you will not be killed for not joining.

Many people live their entire university lives on campus and never become members even without having to compromise their way of life.

I remember in my freshmen year, I had a similar problem, but not like I was asked to join, mine was different. But the truth is I found a way to settle the problem.

I've lost 2 cousins and some friends to the "game" and if you knew one of them, you would have sworn with your life that he was not a member. It's even funnier when you attend funerals for hommies who were lost to the system, and you here their parents ranting and cursing at the people who killed their innocent son.


My advice to the poster s simply stay away from them.

Like someone else stated earlier, Strong men dont have time for core Jews. This is a fact and I know it.

This guy is either lying or is being obtained by some dude acting on his own, otherwise the orientation in your school is different. And I say he is lying.

No cultist will kill or molest a Jew intentionally period.

@ Poster

Either grow up or go hide and cry like a girl.

What does CU being 3hours away from lagos have to do with anything??

O.k maybe he exxagerated a little, port-harcourt to lagos is a 6-hour journey but I've never mede it in that time before, but does that make the rest of his points a lie??

@ 4Him,

I really think you are a danger to both yourself and to society, but you couldnt have presented a better argument to buttress your point.

You have to understand that Nigerian christians live under such fear of their pastors that many of us dont think straight no more.

How do you reason with people who know the truth but would rather settle for a lie.

It's no lie that our churches of today are now big and rich enough to even start trading on the stock market.
It's no lie either that our pastors of today could be equated to God, but yet even to perform ordinary miracles is a problem.
Or isnt it true that about 70% of the entire congregation of these big churches cannot afford to patronize the many business outfits owned by most of these churches.
Is it also a lie that these pastors are now so rich that they can afford jet planes meanwhile some members of their congregations come to church hungry.
Is it a suprise that non of these super churches own any orphanages, missionary schools or hospitals, or even a soft loan scheme. but they indirectly own banks.
Dosent it intrigue you that an annoited man of God would come out on National T.V and say that Gawd said I would become the next president and yet he lost the election.
Isnt it amazng that our pastors ride around in some of the finest automobiles ever crafted by the hands of man, in convoys that would make any person green with envy, with enough bodyguards to withstand a small army, and just to make sure we know who is riding in front of us they finish it off with custom made license plates. I wonder how people are able to get close enough to touch the hem of there garments.
Dosent it worry you that even inside the house Gawd today, there is a very big line between the privelages enjoyed by the rich and that enjoyed by the poor. Isnt it a shame that only the rich get to meet the Pastor, and the poor meet their cell leaders.





WHY is it difficult for any of you pro-cursing campaigners to answer the most simple question asked by 4Him which is WHAT WOULD OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST DO?

FILMZ , REVEIW

1. 300 , Full of shit
2. Apocalypto , Watchable
3. Goodluck Chuck , Alright
4. Titanic , Depressing
5. Gladiators , Buy it, watch it, keep it.
6. Resident evil 3 , Was the part 3 really necessary.
7. I am Legend , Resident evil wanna be.
8. Hairspray , I have my reservations. I still think "grease 1" is better.
9. Sound of music , All time classic
10. Knocked up , I still cant understand why I laughed althrough this movie cos it wasnt the least bit funny.

@ topic

Yes, they are called whores, hustlers and moochers.

@ 4him,

You couldnt have said it better.

You too much jare, abeg help me tell them o! These winners people have been using these poor, hungry _robbers I mean sinners for cursing target practice.

All those winners chapel people are now behaving like loosers simply b'cos someppl beat "papa" at his own game using a cruder method.

Why the curses on these people?? As far as I'm concerned the only people hurt are those who actually died or sustained bullet wounds trying to guard "Papa's" _investment, ^Loot sorry "papa's" money, The insurance companies of these banks and the central bank of Nigeria. "Papa's" money is backed up by Insurance, courtesy of the bank so why are you cursing them??

It is not as if they robbed a church, they only robbed "banks" located inside the massive expanse of land, which houses the many conglomerates of the Winners Chapel Group, which is owned by "Papa".

In fact all of you who cursed or even thought of cussing these robbers should go down on your knees and start praying for them. Also pray to God to forgive you of the sin of wickedness.

Vengance is mine sayeth the lord.

@ Topic

Hellz NO!!

@ Poster

Dude I cant say I feel your pain cos I alwayz have protection on hand. You'l never catch a true playa slippin.

But I have a pal who has a Kid out of wedlock and DAMN!!! The boi is really in deep sh*t. It really is hell.
The guy is a part of his childs life but that shit is really tearing him apart both financially, emotionally and otherwise.
And it's worse if shit like this happens outside 9ja. Esp. here in europe and the states, these girls are brutal, if you slack on that child support, your ass is going to jail.

All I can advice you is to always place that kid as numero uno on your priority list. And never ever give the kid the impression that he/she is a burden or a mistake.
Ask for the mum, I really dont know what to say bout them. Women will alwayz be major bitches especially when you knock them up and then leave them hanging.

Dude hang in their, and learn from this, ALWAYZ have a rubber around cos you never know when you are gonna need it.

I have said it myself times without numbers, the churches of today have all departed from the original mission that christ gave them.

Todays churches are all conglomerates. Industries in their own rights. I mean they even have enough money to apply for presidential elections, and even fund the campaign.

Count how many crusades are held yearly in this country, Count how many Big men of god we have in this country, Count how many cars these men of gods are riding in, Check out the sizes of their individual empires and tell me that these people are truly born again or obeying the commandments of God.

The bible said in the last days, Many shall arise, they shall even do miracles in my name.

I still stand by my first post, He who is not a thief, let him cast the first curse.

Instead of us mourning the death of innocent civillians who died, we are here talking about the morality of what those robbers did.

All these pastors who are hammering from their congregation every sunday have not been cursed yet it is these hungry robbers who just nicked a little bit from their billions that we want to crusify.

Abeg, make una free this matter jare!!

In a case like this, who is the plaintiff and who is the defendant.

Almost forgot, WHATS UP WITH THESE CONVENANTERS CALLING OYEDEPO PAPA??

Na ehn born una??

I know you will all come with the spritual father thing but You are students and not disciples.

That out of the way, I still think those robbers really don HAMMER. 

But yall dont need to worry, I'm sure _papa I mean Oyedepo has got Insurance, he'll get his monies back.

And all those ppl who are sayin _papa , Oyedepo should curse those robbers, This is what I have to ask you;


HE WHO IS WITHOUT SIN SHOULD CAST THE FIRST STONE OR CURSE.

^{monday, tuesday, wenesday, thursday, friday, saturday, sunday,************ Church dey hustle, and the following week, gbo gbo aye,} _{Yahoooze, the music.}


Once again May the souls of the dead rest in peace.

_{Warning; I do not in anyway condone, encourage, advocate or support armed robbery or any crime be it financial or violent. I also advice all those involved in such nefarious activities to desist and turn a new leaf. I also advise people with information about criminals in their neighbourhood or families or thier crimes to report them to the  nearest police staton. Remember the police is your friend.}

OBOY, Those armed robbers don HAMMER. Imagine those guyz for their cribs now. Na moet and crystal dem go dey drink. Dem go come dey play Yahooze.

The money wey dem thief reach moni to read one state budget? Just imagine if dem pull the hit on a monday morning wen all the sunday offering moni still dey inside the vaults. Kai, dem go just resign from thief work.

Make convenant no worry if dem wan recover the money kiakia, make dem just hold one week crusade, one week retreat, 3-day power packed miracle extravaganza, I swear say dem go just recover.

But those thief dem get mind sha!! To go thief God money ontop that still kpai 3 people, this one takes much more than guts. Dis wan show say these robbers no dey fear God. Dis kind wan na ehn dey bring Nemesis join person family tree. Na wa O!

No be like say i dey talk say wetin the thief ppl do good o! but I mean somebody has to look at it from their angle, dem try.

May the souls of the dead rest in peace and Father forgive those robbers for they knew not what they were doing.

Speaking of yesterdays match, I am lost for words. One red card, one penalty, and yet. Ghana one man down and look at how the team played.

I still insist that Vogts Wagen should be sacked.

Congrats super eagles, They played their best match so far in the tournament against Ghana in the First half and Frist 10min of the second half.

That match was lost on technicality. The Ghanaian coach was fantastic. Look at what he did, his team goes one man down, he immediately makes some really good changes, and our boys just could not keep up. Draman & kingston was all it took to turn the ghanain team around.

The good thing is that we now know that we do not have a team. Alot of these boys should and would be dropped. New talents have also been found, and some of them still need some fine tuning.

We really need to find strikers. Boys that can shoot and not miss. Taye, Yobo, Danny boi and Nwaneri Played well in defense, Nsofor, Uche and Osaze played well on the wings. the rest should be flogged and relieved of their jerseys.


_{One naija. Dry bones shall rise again, but not this year.}

Ladies & Gentlemen,

I sat in that staduim and watched both matches live and I have come to one conclusion,

THE GLORY OF GOD HAS DEPARTED FROM THE SUPER EAGLES OF NIGERIA

It would not be suprising if we do not qualify for 2010.
Not only should vogts be sacked, Makinwa should be jailed, Olofijana should apologize on National T.V to nigerians for wearing our jersey, Martins should be flogged, Mikel should be hanged, Apam is still young so we can forgive him.

The coach should explain why the likes of Oruma, Obodo, Odiah & Ayila were not invited for this tournament. Its like the team is being sabotaged by some people somewhere.


Its a shame that these clowns were actually allowed to fill in the boots of the like of Amokachi, Oliseh, Finidi, Yekini, and the boys of 94.

I'm sorry to say this but the eagles have fallen, the question is if we would be able to correct our mistakes in time and rise again.

Husband Gets Nasty Divorce Letter




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Dear Husband: I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good.

I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it.

These last two weeks have been h*ll. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw.

Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee.

You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game.

You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or anything.

Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore, what ever the case is, I'm gone.

P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life! Your EX-Wife



Dear Ex-Wife Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.

It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been.

I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging.

Too bad that doesn't work.

I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice.

When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.

I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it.

I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out.

So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica.

But when I got home you were gone.

Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the filling life you always wanted.

My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me.

So take care.

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born Carla. I hope that's not a problem. Signed Rich As h*ll and Free!

How Old Do YOU Look? Really?

Don't Ask Have you been guilty of looking at others your own age and thinking, surely I cannot look that old? You may enjoy this short story. While waiting for my first appointment in the reception room of a new dentist, I noticed his certificate, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered that a tall, handsome guy with the same name had been in my high school class some 48 years ago. Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate. After he had examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended the local high school. "Yes," he replied. "When did you graduate? He answered, "In 1956. Why?" "You were in my class!" I exclaimed. He looked at me closely, and then the son of a gun asked, "What did you teach?"

Father Explains Condoms to Son

A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year old son.

They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, "What are these, Dad? The man matter-of-factly replies, "Those are called condoms, son. Men use them to have safe sex." "Oh I see," replied the boy. "Yes, I've heard of that in health class at school."

He looks over the display and picks up a package of 3 and asks,

"Why are there 3 in this package?" The dad replies, "Those are for high school boys, one for Friday, one for Saturday, and one for Sunday." "Cool" says the boy.

He notices a 6 pack and asks, "Then who are these for?" "Those are for college men," the dad answers, "TWO for Friday, TWO for Saturday, and TWO for Sunday." "WOW!" exclaimed the boy,

"Then who uses THESE?" he asks, picking up a 12 pack. With a sigh and a tear in his eye, the dad replied, "Those are for married men. One for January, one for February, one for March, "

NIGERIA 3 - Ivory Coast 0

Kanu- 26min
Kanu- 62min
Kolo Toure (own goal) - 80min

nice in a really sick way.

I want to have kids becos;

-3. A childless home is an unfulflied home _{(this rule applys to africa, esp. Nigeria)}
-2. Thats one of the reasons I got married in the first place.
-1. Why I no go want pikins?? I dey mad.
0. Both our parents will be expecting them 1year after our marriage.
1. Its the natural order of life.
2. My mom wants to carry her grandkids before she dies o!
3. Good kids are the pride of any man.
4. I need to know that the wife I purchased is working.
5. I love kids _{(atleast until they are} .
6. I need kids to spend my hard earned money on.
7. I want people i could legally beat, slap and ground in the name of correction.
8. I want to keep the family tree alive.
9. Its a commandment of God. Go into the world, be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth.
10. Cos I need to prove that my decoder (manhood) receives signal.
11. Who will inherit all my wealth??
12. They are the reason why I'm amassing all this wealth.
13. Kids bring joy and blessing to a family.
14. In Africa, Married couples must born pikin. Period.

_{To be continued}

@ 3viso

Be careful o! Take ya time! Na lexus she want no be ice-cream. Why you just come wan pour sand inside my garri?? Abeg find another babe go do romantic with. Na toyin I dey follow now o! I think say you been dey try programme atutupoyo. Nna men, take ya tym.

@ eldee

How about a G-5 jet. She'll become your soul-mate.

@ Toyin
I did consider buying you the lexuses but you know how the Nigerian system works, they are yet to pay civil servants their salaries. So if you'll just settle for a drink today, I promise in the not too distant future, the lexus will follow.

@ Toshmann

You said it like a true born sensible Nigerian. (i.e one of the ones chopping our money in gorvernment)  

@ Almondjoy

The Southern blood in me is saying I should Kidnap you, and ask for a very large ransom, but all you said is the truth.

I have said it time without number, we southerners are one of the dumbest peeps in the country. Oya make una clap for una selves, we don finally win, na yoruba people dey commit all the crimes for area, but who be the past presido wey just commot?? who dey now?? who go enta next?? I fit still bet say the next wan sef no go be   man.

We as a nation have had our minds beclouded with such trivial issues such as tribalism and who commits more crimes Igbos or yorubas and the crooks are having more time to loot the country dry. Instead of uniting we are busy pointing fingers.
O.K I agree, four of my uncles in Canada are drug dealers all from enugu state, another six are in the US dealing crack-cocaine all from Onitsha so?? What does this change??
At least these folks made an effort to better their lives _{(although they went about it the wrong way)} and were caught. Its better to try than to sit idle and die of starvation.

We will all be identified by the colour of our passports and not the tribal marks on our faces??

N.B; At all these igbo bashers, y'all are the reason we are having this arguement in the first place.  The Igbos are very industrous people who have made their marks in the different trades/businesses they are involved in. So I strongly advice that you change your mind set about us. You heard??

Nigeria in all fairness is not a truly united country.

Too many tribes, too many languages, too many beliefs, too many traditions, e.t.c
It was a wrong idea to amalgamate the North and the south. They just dont fit.

But as for the issue of splitting the country, I say no. There is strenght in numbers. We need each other to truly survive as a nation.
The way forward is running true federalism. Take away power from the top. Everyman becomes independent of the the other. But I say we remain togerther as a country.

Now do you also realise that Ghana is a far smaller country than Nigeria?

Do you also realise that the country's income in comparison to its population is quite on the high side?

They dont have the problem of too many ethinicities and languages that we have in Nigeria?

Compare the land mass of both countries??

Even with all the corruption and bad gorvernance that we have suffered as a nation for almost three decades we have still managed to keep our head above water.

Its really sad that we could even contemplate making such comparisons between two totally different Nations.

Nigeria remains the true King of africa. You did not even call South Africa it was Ghana.

Wake up ppl, you live in a great Nation believe it or leave it.

This thread is another piece of trash.

1 british pound = 1.9 ghana new cedis = 1.9 million old cedis.

all they did was divide their old currency by 10000, so what you used to buy for 10,000 cedis is now 1 ghana cedis.

How does this translate into them becoming giants??

Y'all haters keep hating, I'm proudly nigerian anyday in peace or war. We still remain the kings of Africa, re-denomination or not.

sylvex:
* A lady in the public
* A LovePeddler in the bed
* A Chef in the kitchen

word

@ michelin 89

Would you be able to live with yourself knowing you were directly/indirectly responsible for your parents break-up?

From a womans stand point its possible, but a guys angle its difficult.

Even if you manage escape the physical contact, the guy don rape you for ehn mind.

As a traditionalist and an upholder of our customs I say walk away. Go and find a non-Osu to marry.

It's for your own good.