₦airaland Forum

Paul8000:
Good evening ladies and gents...

My name is Paul, I am married to my beautiful wife Vivian by name for the past 16 years . We have 5 wonderful children together Jemima 15, Isaac 12, Elizabeth 9, Samuel 6 and Tabitha 3. We are based in Liberia. We both are working and earning well by God grace. I have few issues with my wife that brought me here to get some advice.

Anytime my wife and I had some misunderstanding, she does involve the children. The oldest 3 she tells them everything including how I cheated on her, she also feed them with lies that I am a bad man and I want to kills her. She tells them so many things to make them hate me. They will disrespect and keeping malice with me to the extend of if I send them for errands, she will stop them and tell them not to go. No matter how much I shouted at them to go, they will not obey me because their mother has the final say. For example my wife and I are having some misunderstandings for over 3 weeks now, we are not talking or sleeping in the same room. I have tried to makes things works for us but she refused.

The children are also keeping malice with me. I sent Elizabeth to go and get some water for me, she obeyed and went to the kitchen, few moments later she came back empty handed staring at me in shock. I asked her what about the water she said her mother said I should go in the kitchen to get the water myself . At that moment I just couldn’t take it anymore I exploded in anger I went to the kitchen we had a heated arguments she pour water on me I really wanted to hit her so hard but I control my anger and walked away.

I left the house for 3 days to cool down. because I was so angry with her I just wanted to be alone. I then went home after 3 days,my 3 oldest children acted like they hadn’t seen me they were busy with their phone/ tablets and it was only my 2 youngest that were missing me they both hugged me like never before me. My youngest daughter refuse to leave my room she even slept in my room. I could see how much she misses me. My wife on her side acted like nothing too her normal behaviour as usual . For the sake of my 2 youngest children I sat her down and talked with her. How we should makes things better for the sake of our children especially the younger ones.

I have apologized to her on my knees all to no avail. I am tired of my wife turning my children against me they have becoming out of control ... I can’t correct them it pains me a lot to see my own children disrespecting me. I don’t want them to grow up and hate me all their life I want to have my family back. A happy home how we used to be before but my wife don’t want to cooperate with me I thought this lock-down will bring us together so we could sorted out our differences and fix our marriage to become better but all to no avail.

I am writing this sitting inside my car in the compound because I can’t even go inside the house because I have nobody to talk to my 2 youngest children that keeps me busy are asleep. I am so lonely all alone please how can I put an end to all this I am fed up ...

Anyone who has ever experienced something like this can you please advice me on how did you overcome this. I hope I was brief enough...

Hmmmm,
What an error

Pls be calm, at this stage you may go out of your way but be calm

We can't hear from your wife to know exactly what is happening and how it got to this stage

But don't give up and don't fight her

You must have been behaving naughty, especially this issue of cheating and it would have been on and on and you don't want to put a final stop to it

You guys must have been having so many pilled up of unresolved issues, so every fresh issue is automatically connected to the previous one which hasn't be solved

You need to seat her down at midnight, when the brain and mind is at rest and have a heart to heart discussion with her

Ask her that you want to know how you guys got to this stage of insult with disrespect and disregard both from her and the children

She will say nothing is wrong but keep asking her

Next day continue again and she will open up

If all these while, you have treated her bad or neglected her in one way or the other or you just have been reporting her to your family, promise her that it will stop

If you have been treating her like a no body or leaving her to struggle alone at home with those kids and you go about having the fun of your life, promise her that it will end that night

You see as it is now, she has polluted the mind of your children and trust children, they will always follow their mum and even support her because they are closer to mothers and they wouldn't want to see mum cry or sad and if they see her in that situation, they will ask her and she will open up, from there, they will see you as a wicked father and start painting that picture

If you are able to get her back let her seat the children down and tell them that you have apologised to her and promised to be a good husband, you too you will promise your children that you will love their mother and love them because they are the only treasure you have

If you allow pride to ride you on this matter, my guy, you will remain in that situation and as the children are growing the situation gets worse

If you have not been providing but drinking away your money, staying out till late or going out to have fun, pls stop it

The best way for a man to win the heart of his children is to love his wife and the children will love you him even more

Once there is peace at home

Whatever you dropped outside, bring it home or forget about it

Discuss with your wife all the time

Be open to her and don't dare manipulate her, an average woman can detect when a man is manipulating her and they don't like it

When you are coming home, get snacks for the children or get for their mum, if its convenient for you, though not all the time

Ask of her anytime you get home from the children

Make her your friend, your companion and your everything

Even if you say you are pulling out to go and start another life, my dear not at this age and stage, you will not find it easy

Pls play the fool and let peace reign in your home

She may not be as bad as you think, but you have not taken time to study and understand her

You have to start doing so

Women by default have a way of attracting sympathy from their children

Once you love your wife, you have full control of your wife and children

Good luck

Xisnin:
The bold is a lie.

You have no idea what hunger means. I hope it remains that way.
It isn't the BS theory you stated above where you can even give to your neighbors.

If your neighbors are truly hungry, you will be avoiding them like plague for your own safety.
You will even hide your car to avoid being marked.

Your last two paragraphs are misleading

You don't seems to care for your neighbours

Amotolongbo:
https://www.pmnewsnigeria.com/2020/04/20/kano-to-evacuate-almajiri-children/amp/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=twitter&utm_campaign=Feed:%20pmnewsnigeria/zOPU%20(P.M.%20NEWS%20Nigeria)&__twitter_impression=true

Very stupid set of human beings

Giving birth like rats and no plan for the parents to provide for them

No plans for the children

Am average Loagisians can't stay one okaigor 24hrs

Not possible

How do you want them to cope ❓

Xisnin:
You are not blind.
Those car owners are not hungry.

Says who ❓

Every one is hungry, if you have enough and your brothers or neighbours are not having at all

Won't you be affected, then you start getting food to them

pyyxxaro:
All these Lagos people too stubborn

It's not as if they are stubborn

If they are not pursuing one thing
One thing will be pursuing them

That's the way they live in Lagos

Something must bring you out

Lordave:
You’re quite a stüpid person.

And you, the most foolish being

Amotolongbo:
He stopped to urinate into the girls pussy.

It is possible that the man and the girl have been doing it before now.
The way it was, theman didn’t rape her. Both the man and minor should be punished.

What offence did the minor commit ❓

Lordave:
Stop typing nonsense here. No community was cut off. That’s East street, the street is right in the heart of Aba, a very busy road that leads to Park Road, Azikiwe Road and Ngwa Road.

Traffic was redirected through St George’s street which also connects the above mentioned roads. So how were some communities cut off?

Your comment was as nonsense as you are , was the road not connected to another road or places.

Anuofia

xreal:
So quick?


He must be an action governor.

Kudos!

Not really

If it rains the entire road will collapse

Besides some community has been cut off

Doing it immediately remains the best time to save cost and more damages

Thanks be to God, am glad that even at their old age, they finally have a male and a female children to call their own

The family is complete now

Though they are aged, they will surely get people to look after the children at home till they get to a year

Infants can disturb both day and night and makes you to get tired after attending to them

Happiness has crown their pains

Ihatefeminist:
nah wah oo
Old mama like this dey born when 29 year old chicks don dey enter menopause for my area

You have to be matured when you talk both online and off line

You have female relations starting from
Your mum
Your aunties
Your sisters
Your girl friend

Respect yourself because you came out of a woman and will pass through a woman all your life

Godjone:
pls ooo no offence. were they still having sex at that age?

God is wonderful

Is there any age that adults can't have sex

Anyway Google IVF and get more details

Left for me, any of them caught robbing at that dead hour

Shut their left leg and right hand, dismembered them from their body, as in let it be cut off, then release them to go

Simplyleo:
Ogochukwu Anioke, Abakaliki



https://thenationonlineng.net/navy-invades-ebonyi-community-exhume-remains-of-missing-officer/

What has this small young man done to them

When the military strike now on them, we will be blaming them

soanl:
Good day, nairalanders. I'm a final year student of a federal university and I want to officially do name change.

Which is better between changing it before or after graduation and won't affect me?

Pls leave everything until after graduation or you must have collected your certificate and done with your NYSC

If you do it now, you will look for your result until your get frustrated and must be forced to repeat anyone you can't find

They drank to stupor and lost an innocent life

They are going dowm for it, at least their job is gone

We should just be careful and control our anger

senatordave1:
Wike has surrendered to almighty buhari

Buhari is his perceived enemy and he doesn't take order's from him

He said so, so many times

Probably, the influencial people in the state intervened

They should obey his state law simple

tyson99:
No need for trial they should be dismissed ASAP

That's not enough to dismiss them, they have families

Worst case, a demotion in rank or suspension form promotion interviews for a year or two

Thane:
My question tho, what do u do for a living pls

Lol,
Why do you ask

EggSauce:
So my babe offended me by ignoring my calls which she's fond of doing... So I decided to cease communication with her just for 6days.... Now she's saying within that 6days of not communicating a certain guy has come to see her parents and they have approved him... I don't want to believe that because we're on a lockdown... Within that 6days sef she blocked me on all social networks and just unblocked me now.... I think she's trying to play a game on me... So house what do you guys think please.... Pls ignore my typos...thank you

If you are not yet ready, let her follow the guy that came for her

If she comes back to you to say thst it didn't work, continue from where you stopped

He is a a casanova, they have sweet mouths and plays their games perfectly

Acmepreneur:
I used to call him fiancée before but bow, I have realized he's a boyfriend.we've been together for more than 4years.
I'm so tired of him right now, I love him and he loves me according to him.
My boyfriend was supposed to be my only friend because he's the only person I trusted the most in the entire universe. He prefers to chat and gist with his friends, not me.
The only thing he likes us to do is sweet talking, if I give him the chance, we would spend the next 5years discussing rubbish. E.g''how are you my baby, have you eaten etc.

He never discuss marriage, I'm always the one to bring up the topic, and he's bored a minute into it. Sometimes he says we are still young and sometimes he says not to pressure him.
Sometimes he would say I'm not ready
I never said we should do it now but all I'm saying is we should at least know where we are going and have some plans, or even discuss how our marital life would be.

He's good at saying sorry at every slight complain without allowing me to finish my sentence, that annoys me so much, because its a hypocritical sorry, and he would be angry if I say its hypocritical and tell me so many people want someone that would be apologetic and if I know his mind deep down.

I'm someone that derives joy in planning for future, but my boyfriend doesn't at all. No single plan about us except in his head, sometimes when I challenge him, he could say he planned this and that.
If I tell him today, I'm going to Canada, he doesn't mind, tomorrow Australia. He could say he's planning to go to Spain. I believe he should at least let us plan together where we both would be together, but he just doesn't care.
There's no US in his plans, only him,and in my plans too, I intentionally tell him those things I'd he would even say, what about us, but he doesn't at all.

Our relationship is filled with quarrels because of this behaviour of his, very lackadaisical about us, but yet, he only want to discuss sweet things, and if I don't give in, he will start to be angry. How can I be happy when our life is not progressing and he's not helping matter, sometimes he would call me a sadist, and that I don't like peace between us.

He doesn't care if I grow or not either, he just want to see me grown, he tells me that I'm broke and my mates are doing Better than myself. I like to tell him to do this and that to better his life, but he has turned me to a disturber and I should face my own Godforsaken life with my useless Msc.

Yesterday, I told him to stop calling or chatting me if he doesn't want me to curse him because he doesn't make me happy. Its better we don't speak because we won't fight, but if he calls and we speak, he would expect me to be replying his sweet words in a happy mood which is not possible, he could then gets angry and cut the call. That is when I would burst out and reminded of his lackadaisical behaviour in the relationship. If we don't talk, I won't remember him and thus won't be so hurt.

He's working and gives me money and thus he's good to me, he doesn't give me any problem oher than those listed above, he's a gentle person, and doesn't get angry, if he gets angry, he's easily calm. He doesn't cheat or with any bad behaviour

You are already prepared

How prepared do you think this guy is?

This particular guy loves you but he is not yet ready for marriage

You can't bear it any longer

Just walk away if you wish, without coursing him pls

He isn't ready for marriage or proposal that will take him forever to start

Is not as people are happy about his death, noo ❗ ❗

The issue is that he is connected to the the same person they hate so much

Then it brought transfer of aggression

May his soul rest peacefully

klbakare:
Am tired of staying at home

Pls try more, we are almost getting to the point of freedom

zexy2030:
when men are hard it depends on their class, they don't fvck any persons with holes but someone of their specie but for women going for a dick instead of considering the person is degrading and body shaming meanwhile she can be victimised for going that low for her satisfaction, though some classless men visit whor.e centers for sex but not all men wants sex from any type of woman once they are h.orny.

I understand ur point, I knew how many times i ran away from some pastor's wife, the most scary thing is that they flirt with me in the presence of their husbands, I will be the one closing my eyes.

When I was in school, an aged women in her 50s and one in her late 30s were after me for sex but realized I can't they are not my class. I would masturbate than sleep with their type, they are not my class of women, I can't enjoy such women.

A woman can fvck any dick but a man most times consider the face, the environment before the fvck otherwise its all rituals. Men don't fvck anyhow.

In that case, you assume women are going after you both old and new

Is alright

Women never do you some thing

Keep on, you can only tell a blind man that there is no oil in the soup but not that there is no salt in the soup

You still have a long way to go

emmaodet:
Sure, this is a better reply.
Happy sunday

Same from here and stay safe this period

zexy2030:
its like u don't understand that women with time depreciates in value then become envious that their men are after other girls. so then she will use money to attract men of her fantasy otherwise she will have aboki, truckpushers as her only option for sex

Men also depreciates, that's why they use viagra to strengthen up

Aboki and truck pushers are men, so what's the difference

When a woman is Hot the important thing is that it has to be a dick so the dick bearers can even be a shoe maker

When a man is hard on all he needs is a pussy, that's why you see the stupid ones raping children all in the effort for him to get sexual satisfaction

At a certain time in a man's life his erection becomes a challenge, so are men not affected?

That you are a youth now means you are yet to meet the elderly men to ask them at what stage do you start experiencing erectile dysfunction

Have you seen where they are advertising aphrodisiacs for women,
no it's always for men that you see such adverts

Why is it so, because they know that it does happen

And when a man can't get life down there, he becomes so worried

Women will always be women even at menopause all you need is the same fore play to turn her on and on the more

It's that same fore play that men have been using on them from adult hood to elderly age

CsRockefeller:
How old are you?

I really want to know if I could excuse you from your comment because you just spoke like a 16 year old.

Emotionally and psychologically, you are not fit to be in a relationship.

That's your thinking and we can't be reasoning the same way because my brain is with me and your brain is with you

cococandy:
Quickest way to lose her license.

You don’t discuss people’s health history without their permission.

It’s truly a difficult situation for her.

So if she does that to her neighbour he will be stupid to quote her, that the nurse told him

Is he a slowpoke

zexy2030:
it's not just about having children, she will have lots to loose not having a man. Her type needs a soft n gentle man to marry but she should provide for the gentle man while she cheats off.

You don't understand the point

She said she doesn't believe in having one man

Her point was clear enough

There is nothing to regret for not having a man

She wants to have men and that's a crazy life

So best for her is to have as much as she wants instead of being married and still keep men

Then having kids is necessary especially at old age

This same statement above is applicable for both men and women

No one is talking about regrets here, we have women without husband

Circumstances may put one in thst shoe

That it works for you doesn't men it will for the next person

Mind you a ma will always go after a woman, so there is no way a woman will lack a man

As it is in women so it is in men

When you see yourself in some certain cycles, what out the men no matter their age will still go after women with out husband and they still get the same sex satisfaction every other person gets

It's a game of no regret

emmaodet:
And when has losing a woman to another man been unfortunate?
Abi na even best thing to happen to a man.
A cheating wife runs away from her hubby to an Ex or side bobo and you call the hubby unfortunate?
Instead of him to go to church for Thanksgiving.
So you actually think feeding, housing, clothing etc a woman in marriage is to the man advantage? That the woman is doing the man a favour for doing that? I think you overestimate you women's value in marriage.
Let the side bobo carry the liability for 2 months now weda him eye no go clear and gets tired of an Unproductive Liability that has all the time in the world to look for what to do to support the home rather using such precious time to hook up and chat with a side bobo.
I blame guys a lot. If we say make men no marry now so that the Unfortunate woman will be on the street now running up and down on how to survive and pay her bills, they will say we are crazy.
If the job of the man is to make sure another man doesn't get my woman, then pls tell what is the work of the woman too?
A consumer? Financial drainage? Liability? Sex object? Unproductive, unrepentant serial cheating liability?
Spits*

You are over reacting

Every man knows the value he places on his woman, like wise every woman knows the value she places in her man

So it depends on the value

Understand it from that angle

No man or woman is doing favour for marrying the person they get married to

It is the synergy that matters

Love and value.

It is found in both sexes