₦airaland Forum

Samantha123:
When your parents punish you for something they think it's wrong, do they care whether you progress or retrogress

From what the op said, you can see that they still treat her like a little kid and not an adult.

I guess they took her to the village so that she could stop seeing the man who was providing for her since she said he stays close to their family house.

Is even more better because those local champions in the village will love a fresh babe like her

Then she will be put in a family way

That will not clear to her family that they spoilt her future

But I am still doubting the story because once a girl have gone through the university and out of the she starts speaking out for herself

Rach310:
it might be a fabricated story but it happens in our society where parents won't give their Adult children some space.

I know parents can be over protective if their children
But not to the detrimental of their children and them as parents

VictorUSA:
I'm experiencing love now but my fear is the bitter heartbreak that follows a break up. What drastic step should i take to mitigate the pain when the break up actually happen?

From the look of things, you are already wishing yourself a heart brake

So wait till it happens

Samantha123:
She was sent to the village as a punishment for seeing a man who was providing for her since her parents weren't giving her any pocket money.

Ok to do what exactly to progress or retrogress

VictorUSA:
Are you advising him to take her back?

He already advised himself and he has already taken her back

So read it properly again

VictorUSA:
This is my first time being in love. I'm truly in love with my gf and she love me too. My problem now is how do I stop this love or at least reduce because I know break up and heartbreak is inevitable.

You have to experience love

And you have to experience break up

It will give you the needed knowledge and experience on how to love and not to love

Sneakytoucher:
Good question... Didnt she make friends in the uni too?

I think it's a fabricated story

How can a graduate be sent back to the village

To do what, a research or what

blackpink22:
I'm 23 a girl and a graduate , spent most of my life in a boarding school , then straight to a private uni for college , I'm done with school now, I have no skill ,no job , very few friends that live far away from me and nothing else
my parents still won't let me go out or make friends but everyday I'm hearing marriage , marriage , marriage
I'm depressed , I wish they would just die and leave me alone
to think both of them eloped together against their parents wish and are now forming saints because they older is really annoying

no they do not provide for my needs, pads , toiletries , clothes ,my hair and money , every girl child needs money but my parents don't know that , if I tell them , they'll give me money to buy tissue which is unhygienic, I got lucky and found a man that covers those things for me and more but they were against that too , took my phone away and sent me back to our dry village , I live in their house and if there's food I eat but most times I lose my appetite coz I'm not happy , I wish they would disappear , one or both of them

I'm tired and I don't want to runaway , i just need advice on what to do

For how long will you be subjected to this kind of depression

That man that have been there for you, why not look for him

How could you be transported to the village after graduation

Didn't you go for youth service

Demmy03:
As an educated woman who has a fiance,introduction done, waiting for marriage date to be choose.got an opportunity to travel abroad or continue here with the marriage and let the opportunity slip away..came from a poor family...the introduction has been done before the opportunity showcase.what should be done...advice pls

Abroad or no abroad
If you love him, you will go abroad and make better plans to fasten the marriage ceremony and make plans for his relocation

If you have a good job here and he too have a good job here, conclude your marriage plans and both of you can leave, the same opportunity of traveling can suit both of you

If you don't love him and you believe you will get a good man better than him and you don't care,
Seat him down and tell him your relocation plans and you don't have any hope of coming back soon

That you will advise him to move on with his life and get another woman

If at the end you get a better catch, good luck

If you get a bad catch and you regret it, deal with it

efelicity:
Nairalanders, my wife divorced me some few days ago and i was totally down, altho she was with the man for those few days, but she's back begging me to take her back. The man already had two women in his house and he doesn't give her the attention she needs so she still packed out and come begging me and i accepted her back so that she can take care of our kids.

Well you have tried and I think she has gotten some experience and lessons after trying another man

At this point now, give her responsibilities, i mean family responsibilities so that she will seat tight and face her home, then stop looking outside

Dainy1:
To me, I already recommended divorce. What is your own opinion in this matter?

My younger sister opened up on some ugly situation in her marriage and to me it's not acceptable.

Ever since she got married, she provides everything for herself. Including, in pregnancy through delivery, feeding and paying bills. Her son is 5yrs old now. She's responsible for school fees and everything. The husband has been given excuses up and down without providing and supporting. He has a job but he's being manipulative.

He get her pregnant and begin to sweet talk her and wouldn't provide nor support. He wants children, but he wouldn't pay any bills.

Right now, he's pressurizing her for another child or he'll get more children outside their marriage. She's afriad of more responsibilities of having another baby with her husband because she has no job and her business is struggling.

Since her husband is a liability, let her Concentrate on the one she has at the moment till she finds her bearing

If it happens that he want to go and pregnant another woman outside, let him go

After all she has nothing to loose
The man is just milking her while saving money for another woman

Dont be surprise that marriage is not even stable and may hit the rock

Solofresh2:
There is this lady friend of mine. We have been friends before she even got married and she is aware of my single status. I have decided to remain single until am ready for marriage.

So she told me how her husband has been maltreating her and she told me her husband is cheating on her. She told me she has always admired me but don't know how to tell me.

Though I noticed this but decided to overlook it. She said she wants a tight relationship with me and I should keep it secret, telling me she finds me attractive. I was just surprised because I never expected her to say all this.

However, I told her to resolve the issue with her husband and talk things out with him but she seems to have lost much interest in her husband who she has two beautiful girls with already.

Sex is not a problem for me as I know where to get it, but having sex with a married woman is a no no for me.

What do you guys think over this issue?

What I can understand here is that she is stranded and needs a man to give her attention and affection which she doesn't get from her husband

manoflove22:
Sequel to this thread https://www.nairaland.com/7148350/could-indicate-hiv-symptoms, that I created some month ago about my recurrent HIV symptoms

Since up to 4 months now that i have Bleep some brothels hoe raw, condom burst

Since then i have been having oral thrush, random joint pain, back pain and I have been talking antifungal and some pain killer.

I Google hiv symptoms and the site even confirmed my illness as one and i already believed I'm hiv. I started google how to live with the virus, how i have destroyed my life, how I'm gona be hiding drug from my people.

Fella this is up to 4 months now and thankful to God I tried this alure test stripe and the result came negative. I have done several time still negative and now i have gave myself peace of mind.

And since 4 months now i never had any penetrative sex whatsoever.

Although i still battle with mild oral so I'm going to check for diabetes cos i consume sugar alot which flourish growth of the candida.

Don't bother to tell me to wait till 6month cos hiv is not a hide and seek virus.

Now i have hang my fornication boot and wait and keep myself till i marry than to live on taking arv drug till the rest of fuccckin life

It just a rare second chance!


Come rejoice with me

You have gotten an experience that have taught you a lesson to calm down and hold yourself

Terminator0x0:
I got my girlfriend pregnant I accepted the responsibility I am not financially buoyant I am not doing anything for now my parents have assisted us with the little they could it wasn't sufficient because my girlfriend was sick after delivering my parents have tried until all the money was finished my dad said he have to contact her father to tell him about her daughter health problem because if anything happens without her father knowledge he can arrest us my dad contacted him he sent his brothers to pick her alone without the baby it is 3 weeks ago my parents are pleading with her father to please come collect the baby she is crying a lot she refuse to drink my boy milk and she is getting sick they said they will assit her with whatever they can but he refused we have tried everything to calm the baby and it is not working we are scared to loose her we don't know what to do again I know he hate me so much but he cant punish the innocent baby for my mistakes the man is here please beg him for me to have mercy on the innocent baby who needs her mother

Honestly, you and your family should look after that child

Your mum have been a mother before and she should look after that child

We have motherless children, they survived on feeding with infant formulars so your child should be able to survive

Your girl father have taken his daughter and left your daughter for you because he can't also look after his sick daughter and look after an infant without having enough money

At this point let every one take care of his daughter

The man hates you and he doesn't want anything to do with you at least for now

Your dad did well to inform the man about the situation and he has done well to take his daughter and leave your own daughter for you

His reason is that, by the time you finish nursing that child, you will think twice before sleeping with another girl to get her pregnant

But if you really need her, then go and hustle and do her marriage properly and let's see if he will still reject you

IntelChief:
My elder sister is around 32 years and still not serious with marriage. Her only focus is on making money and she had been very successful in that aspect. She has a well paying job and is not only comfortable but also supports me financially sometimes.

But I just can't imagine why she is not disturbed about the fact that she is still single at her age. A lot of guys I know had been approaching her but she never accepts even a relationship offer from them, talk more of marriage. (And am very sure that she is not a lesbian or any of that).

As a church guy, I have seen a lot of women stock in this not being married thing and jumping from one church to the other seeking for husbands. Some of them, out of desperation, fall victims in the hands of fake pastors and sharp guys. I really don't want my sister to go through such.

Initially, I wasn't disturbed, but right now, this issue is burning not only me but also my aging mother. My mother had even stylishly urged my sister to go get married on several occasions. But she won't.

What really got me mad was when I was discussing with my sister some days back about her future plans. She told me stuffs like planning on travelling abroad for greener pastures, bla bla bla, but made no mention of marriage.

Honestly guys, I am tired. And as a man in the family, I am thinking of changing it for my sister. Am planning on threatening her that if she doesn't take the issue of marriage serious, I will go physical with her and teach her some lessons. But the issue is that she is my elder sister and I have some respect for her. And my action might end up affecting the bond in the family.

You dont force people to marry rather you encourage them to marry

So, you can seat with her on a good day and tell her that you are waiting for a day you will walk her down the alter and that day will be one of your happiest day on earth

I think this is a polite way of letting her know that you want her to get married

Lastly, you have to be careful so that you don't create problems with you and her in the future, no body will support you for being confrontational because it's her business

Wizywiz:
well sometimes they allow life teach them without learning from those it has taught...goodafternoon godmother, hope your weekend is going on fine?

Its going fine
Happ weekend

Life it's self is a teacher

Wizywiz:
life no supposed hard..abeg make tey tey asset like u help dey give orientation to this younger ones ..many of Dem na liabilities Dem be...ok check out now wey be say things tight for ur guy and area rough... imagine even d ones wey be ordinary friends don vamoose ooo ... tomorrow now Dem go wan pitch der tenth ooo...try dey reason Dem oooo..life no supposed be like dat...no money no friends.....mama Mia...as my new godmother asay tuale for you... odogwu nwanyi

Thanks once again for your statement

You see those girls in that category, don't blame them much because they are fair Weather friends

They believe that they can only rip they don't care about labouring with any guy

So if at the end they are now left out, they will now calm down and have sense

By then they have gotten a bitter experience

Fisiryorh:
Bless you...

Thanks dear

Wizywiz:
am fine and good too... thank you..have a lovely evening and weekend

God bless you

Wizywiz:
mama Mia you be tey tey asset...what we have these days na new liabilities ...

Lol
Hahaha

You funny no be small

Wizywiz:
with time he will get over such feelings ... madam frozen70 good evening to you....hope you are good and family?

Ohh dear
Good evening
We are doing fine
Hope you are good and taking care of yourself

Thanks for checking on me

Fisiryorh:
Good day folks.

I'm not here to dis mother's(especially mine) but them too get wahala (especially mine)..

Over the years, I have had issues where I sit down and discuss with my mom about it.the main problem is that this woman CANNOT just keep her mouth shut..she cannot in anyway keep a secret which is terrible as a mother.

I resorted to telling her only the nessecities and even with abeg abeg, the woman would still leak it..to make matters worst, she can discuss secrets with anybody including a house maid(I'm telling you,it's that bad)..

I have screamed, shouted, quarlled, qouted pages of the Holy Books to her about guarding secrets but all I get is "YOUNG MAN, SHUT UP.. I'M YOUR MOTHER AND I KNOW IT ALL"... she's too hard headed (Yes,her ITK too much...imagine her claiming omniscience as a mere mortal that she is)..I have done this for over 15years with no change from her and I am tirrrrrreeddddd....

I wish to take drastic actions like cutting her off(not completely but eating with her with a verrryy long spoon)..for example, telling her about my marriage (if I do get married Sha oo) 24hrs to the event..if she like make she come, if she like make she no come.I DON TIRE...

Please oh, my country people. Make Una drop me some advice (matured and sensible advice/s coz this issue Don activate my dragon mode and any mistalk sé, u go collect)....I'm quarter to lossing it all towards my mother...

Thanking ya'll...

Cc: lalasticlala

You know what

Just respect yourself by avoiding any confrontational issues with your mother

If you are leaving with her and seeing all those nonsense, then pack out honorably

If you tell her secrets and she leaks them, then she doesn't need to know about it

Tell her things only when you know that you have concluded that plan and doesn't need her input both words and finance

Dont even let her notice your withdrawal from her

Dainy1:
What is your take on this?
As a woman, would you use your money to funish the house if your husband would not do it? Maybe because he barely live in that house or because his salaries is small and he wouldn't want to make sacrifices? you're married and he basically wouldn't do that? For your comfortability and that of your children, would you use your money to buy chairs, fridge, TV and many other items in the house ?

For married men, would you let her?

What would you advise?

Well for me, there is no big deal about that, so far we are married and have children

I will furnish our house and put those things I think is needed

The only place I will have problems with him is if he spends for another woman outside

Championxxx:
I am dating a 34 years old single mother of two girls , she is a business woman and I am a bar tender. She support me financially I don't lack anything and I truly love her for real not because of what she is giving me but I love her for who she is. She is the first woman I have ever slept with in my entire life and I want to spend the rest of my life with her but my parents are against the relationship because of the age difference even my siblings doesn't want to hear anything about her they say i should quittherelationship. But I love her so much she asked me to move in with her and I don't want to disobey my parents. I am torn between the woman I love and my family what should I do or whom should I choose, I know that it is not a competition family should alway come first but I think my happiness also matter. By the way the relationship is 9 months. Please admin do not push my post to the front page because I don't want immature advice I need mature advice?

I am still wondering if you have enough experience to stand this relationship with her, when she starts women drama

Is good to be inlove and be loved but don't loose your self

I think you can still be dating her while you plan for another relationship

You are still a young man considering your age and you just have to take caution

Meanwhile, don't propose to her yet so that she will not say that you already did promise her

Also be careful about her getting pregnant carelessly because she won't abort it

Think twice

fineboynl:
I noticed since I start using water from the well. I started getting darker. I use the well water to bath and cook due to the costly water here now. I still buy water on my tank but in other to save it longer I use water from the well. Could it be the reason I'm getting darker?

If yes. I need to know if it's the one from bathing alone or also from the one from cooking. I'm suspecting the one from cooking.

I think you are being exposed to sun

yomcity:
Am a young man in my late 30s and ve done anything a man should to better his life outside rituals,but things not working out as planned that atimes I feel like ve been forsaken by Almighty God, although am not worried cause I ve a strong believed that all will b well. reasons why my BP is rising now is my inlaw who passed way around June this year and we all agreed for final burial by October but the funniest things is I lost my job same June and ever since ve been struggling with menial jobs Jst to put food on my tables with wife and two kids, now the days are drawing nearer and I Dnt ve anything to.contribute even my clothes ve not.paid for it and wat could b more shameful than this, sincerely my last options now is suicide cause Yoruba will say Iku ya ju esin lo, all friends are complaning ve played bet to the extent that I lost a 148k yesterday.......I said God what ve I really done wrong, that am going through this serious challenges I need to say it's beyond me and Dnt knw where else to turn to..........Pls matured and intellectual advice only, pen down for now.

If you continue like this, you may go down before burial of your inlaw

You have to be calm

Wether you contribute or not to she must be buried

If you have nothing to pit down, discuss with your wife

If you have a good relationship with your wife, she can look for financial help to dress you guys and you bring few of your direct family especially your parents to attend

What if it's your own biological that is to be buried that means that you will dig ground and enter before her burial

What if you develop BP because of the financial stress you are going through

Who will get drugs for you

Look the worst case, let them laugh at you

When you have enough money you can sponsor her anniversary

Just talk to your inlaw especially that one that will reason with you

Niece:
An unidentified man has been caught stealing a drink “Champari” in one of the supermarkets along Aka Etinan Road in Uyo, the capital of Akwa Ibom State.

After he was caught and beaten, he was stripped. Upon interrogation, the man disclosed that he stole the drink to celebrate his birthday.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CjsQxiiooBb/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

I don't think he is stable because am still wondering how come

Killbillz:
I love ur mind too much... U don't think like the average girl and on any topic u drop comments that always blow my mind.. I like u

Waooo
Thanks very much for your compliments
I appreciate you

blaquebelle:
I hope you know that having a say doesn't mean he can't suddenly change when he makes it. It has happened so many times In reality

Till then

balmingilead:
Please I need advice. I and my husband had some issues and he asked me to leave. I left because my mum said we will settle the matter in her place that I should come. Some I packed my things and left with my children. When I got to mum place she called my husband but he refused to come. So I stayed with her for 3weeks and later went to my cousin place to stay. I pleade with my husband to take me and the children back but he refused.

Now when I left it wasn't up to 2weeks before he brought a lady to the house. The lady was staying with him.

After 4months with the help of God, his friends and some relatives he we settled the issues. And he brought us back to the house. But the problem now is he is insisting on marrying the girl. They are both serious on getting married. He even told me he brought me back because of my children that he is not my husband any more. That am only in his house because of the children.
I don't know what to do. We have been together since 2016. And I love
Him so much. He had treating to leave the house.
Now he complained of not having money, my 2 children have not resume school this term because of money. We don't have food in the house. But he is insisting on marrying that girl. The little money he have he will share with her. Am not happy because financially he is down and am ready to manage with him but he refused to leave this Hausa lady. He said he doesn't want to marry me any more. That am in his house because of the children. Please I need help. The lady in question live very close to our house.
Please advise me on what to do. I don't want my home to scatter
The lady said she must marry him.

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The only thing that you can do is to respect him and be loyal to him

Dont challenge his authority just be humble

For the main time, stop telling him not to marry her
Submit your request into prayers to God

Pray both day and night

Is only God that can change his mind

Am sure by now you have learnt a bitter and big Lesson

Stephen2324:
As a young lady, would you rather build with a man or marry an already made man?

Discuss and give your reasons.

Men are free to query you but do not insult any lady for her own opinion.

I will gladly build with a man from scratch to finish

My reason is for me to make impact into his life, my family and have a say in my marriage

That's all