₦airaland Forum

Why are you replying that slowpoke? People like him like suffering and smiling. They are so used to oppression that they don't even know their rights! His likes are programmed to accept mediocrity. Nigerians aren't worth it bro.

OndoFirstBorn:
Why? For speaking for you and your unborn children? For being a voice to the voiceless?

Politicians are not the problem of Nigeria, Lazy youths like you are the main problemm

You have a very low IQ. Do you think that these people (politicians) give a damn about you?? They all see you lots as losers! This man (Your President) has been preaching the gospel of "growing the naira" when he doesn't practice what he preaches. All Nigerian politicians are the same! Use your head! This isn't an achievement! These people have left the educational sector to rot while they send their kids to the best schools abroad! You lots, on the other hand, will have to deal with strikes, dilapidated infrastructure and unemployment while their kids will take jobs that are rightfully yours! Continue to shout Ipop, Afonja or Arewa while they and their offsprings enjoy the best this life has to offer. Idiots.

voltron14:
This one go pain some people.

Fine. You are not interested in a career driven woman but do not complain if all she does is spend your money, ask you to foot all her bills, cannot engage you in a conversation (after all, you don't want a "highly educated" woman), watches telemundo/zee world and does not contribute anything financially to the house. We don't want to hear that your wife is a lazy parasite who sits at home all day watching T.V. Don't complain that all she does is to take and take from you.

Designerdollars:
Only financially handicapped men want all what you stated up there from a woman.
I for one would never marry a lady who is career driven.I'm financially free(at least by world standards) and I want a woman to build a home with. Not some 'clever' feminist who will be busy building another man's business.

This is why I say that Nairaland men are the most confused set of people on the face of the planet. You complain about pretty girls being dumb and having nothing to offer except sex now I'm seeing a quote rejecting the notion of having a highly educated woman as a wife. What do you lots want? You complain about poor girls being financial parasites while rich girls are arrogant and disrespectful. So I ask again...what do you lots want?

Designerdollars:
Big boobs, big ass, intact virginity, fine face,
good cooking/domestic skills and most importantly, she must be submissive!

Post edit:she should be slightly educated too. I find extremely educated female's unattractive, repulsive and intimidating
I don't want to be competing with woman wey i marry put for house

Sowore did not think things through. Nigerians are not worth fighting for. They will abandon you in your hour of need and call you all manner of names. All over the world, there are anti-government protests from Chile to Hong Kong. In Nigeria, people will mock you for fighting for their well being. They prefer suffering and smiling. They will say "Oh well, God will save us". God helps those who help themselves you muppets. Continue your suffering and smiling. You deserve your leaders.

When I say that Nigerians are stuck in the 19th Century, people think I am joking. Just look at how the OP's main issue with the couple's seperation is no one to cook, clean and satisfy the man's sexual needs. There's something called a washing machine. The man can wash his cloths with it. You buy your favorite Nigeria cuisine from many joints if the man is too lazy to cook himself. As for fulfilling his sexual needs, well, he can easily hire an olosho or get a new wife. Life is not complicated. If Nigerian men learnt how to cater for themselves without any woman's assistance the women will be forced to respect them as they will realize that they do not have a monopoly of domestic chores which they can easily use against the men.

I'm not surprised that foreigners can come to Nairaland and mock Nigerians on their own forum. When you are divided by religion, tribe and politics this is what happens. Igbos and Yorubas call each other unprintable names and fail to realize that foreigners are viewing this thread. When you have a President who decides to visit South Africa despite all that happened, this is what happens. Charity starts at home. If Nigeria had it's house in order this rubbish wouldn't happen. Chest beating online wouldn't solve anything.

Burna Boy is my favorite Naija artist over the past few years but he goofed on this one. He should have been a man of his word and rejected the offer to perform in SA. Now, he can't take back that humiliation.

I don't blame her. I blame the useless men in this country that don't know their worth. Men in this country have no sense of worth. Believe that the only way to attract a woman is to waste money on her. The money this idiot wasted on this bimbo could have helped a lot of poor people in need. The so-called "sugar daddy" most likely has family members that are struggling but would not give them one kobo under the guise that he is broke.

The culture of "the man has to provide while the woman is just a helpmate" has destroyed many relationships between the sexes in this country. A lot of women feel that having a rich boyfriend is a right. They don't see the need to work hard as one maga can pay all their bills. All these old "egbons" who couldn't get women in their youth are now stealing girls from young men. As a result of this, young men end up becoming yahoo boys or drug dealers in order to compete with the "egbons". The girls end up becoming materialistic and prostitutes as they have no respect for young hustling guys. They want a "ready made" product. God help the next generation in this country. We are screwed.

Bros, I'm not talking about coming to Nigeria to find a wife. I'm already based in Naija. What I am talking about is those of us who have spent a long time abroad, moved back and now based in Nigeria. Hence, why I said Repatriates. If we were still based abroad, this issue would come up. Who willingly jumps into the unknown?

Hi, I have been talking a lot of guys who spent substantial amount of their lives (at least a decade) abroad and relocated to Nigeria. The feedback I have receive in regard to dating Nigerian girls is bad. If you are a Nigerian guy who has spent most of his formative years abroad ( the West in particular), the dating scene will be a bit difficult for you for so many reasons:

1. Differences in Mindset: If you grew up/lived in the big cities abroad such as New York, London, Paris, Toronto or even Cape Town that is around the corner, you tend to have a cosmopolitan view of life. What this means is that you are used to interacting with women from different nationalities around the world. This gives you what they call "a variety of flavors" to choose from. In Nigeria, your options are limited.Yes, there are a lot of foreigners in Lagos but they constitute a small minority and keep to themselves. With Nigerian girls, regardless of tribe, you encounter people with the same mentality irrespective of their class.

2. Your views on dating and Finance are different: Most guys who lived in the Diaspora for the bulk of their lives are used to splitting the bill 50-50. I am not saying all but a lot are used to that concept of dating. In Nigeria, the scenario is VERY different. As a man in this country, you are "responsible" for paying for everything. You are not seen as a "man" unless you "show" that you are "financially capable". Even Nigerian women who lived abroad also exhibit that mentality due to the environment they are in. If you refuse to accept this arrangement, they (Nigerian women) will tag you as "broke" and "stingy". They will tell you that you don't love them. In this country, showing a woman that you love her means you have to spend some dinerios.

3. Dealing with her extended family: In Nigeria (like most African societies) when you marry someone, you also marry the person's family. Now there's nothing wrong with that. We are all Nigerians here. The issue if the girl's family comes with a lot of baggage. Maybe she is the breadwinner and her family members see you as their gateway to prosperity. Or you have overzealous in-laws who want to interfere with your family life. That becomes a problem. If you are used to dating women from other cultures that do not have this extended family brouhaha, then it might be quite irritating.

4. Packaging: Image is everything in Nigeria. No one wants to be seen as poor. Everyone wants to be seen as "posh". If you are a simple chap who is not interested in status or keeping up with the Jones you will be irritated. Most girls in this country look down on guys who do not have a car and also take public transport. There are many returnees who like to dress simple so as not to attract unnecessary attention. A lot of Nigerian women have the mindset that if you are not looking slick (whether in suit or native) then you are still struggling. Abroad, you could interact with a chick in most public settings such as the train, bus, on the street, shops, restaurant without problems. Whereas, in Nigeria, the mentality of the environment does not enable such.

5. Conversation: The last but not the least is the issue of conversation.Even guys who have spent their whole lives in Naija complain about this. The conversation game of girls in this country is bad. Many of them send short texts such as "okay". Most of them could not chat to save their lives. Majority of them cannot make the effort to chat to you. They expect you to do all the work. That mindset is the reason why so many of them struggle to get a man abroad because no one has time for that crap when there are other options. Make some bloody effort.

I am not trying to castigate our girls but most it's only guys who have lived in Naija for the majority of their lives that can handle their materialistic tendacies. Nigerian female repatriates have a much better luck in the dating market than the men because everything is catered to them.

Confirmedzombie:
This old cargo is a broke ugly olosho. No wonder at such age she is still single.
Husband snatcher

You are sick and you don't realize it. Every successful woman is an olosho? What does her marital status have to do with the topic? You lots believe that life begins and ends with marriage. That "Olosho" can buy your whole lineage 20 times over.

Welcome to Nigeria where a poor person steals N20k worth of shoes and is subjected to inhumane treatment by soldiers. Meanwhile, these same soldiers would fight tooth and nail for politicians who have stolen BILLIONS of Naira. Yes, welcome to Nigeria where being poor is the equivalent of being a second class citizen. This is why corruption will never end as people will rather die than being poor in this country.

I don't usually comment on this sort of threads but I will add my two cents. Women who call men broke either on social media or in real life suffer from poverty of the mind. Women who come from affluent backgrounds do not have the time for that crap. They know the kind of men they are looking for. Chances of them crossing paths with broke guys are slim except destiny permits. People that have something do not need to prove to anyone what they have. Women from poor background detest men from poor backgrounds as they remind them about their own condition.

As for the misorgynist attitudes of Nairaland males towards women, a lot of these guys are frustrated by the state of the economy. They feel financially inadequate and are pouring their frustration towards women. A lot of these guys are in their 20s.Men that are 30 and above do not have time for that crap. They are busy hustling to earn a living.

In short, Nigerian women regardless of class are materialistic. Some are worst than others. Nigerian guys believe that money will solve all their problems. Both sexes deserve each other.

Nairaland is just a reflection of what the average Nigerian is becoming. Nigerians complain about tribalism abroad and always quick to insult any foreigner who insults the country but they are very tribalistic themselves. Yorubas and Igbos in particular would call themselves names that would make the Klu Klux Klan proud. A lot of the men here call women unprintable names. Nigerians talk about religion and morality but they cheat and commit crimes the most. They talk about people in diaspora being second class citizens abroad whereas they are second-class citizens in their own country. You are a second class citizen if you don't have money in this country. A picture of floods in Lagos turned into a tribal war even though that was the reality of life in Lagos.

The problem with this forum is they allow anybody with small data to join. The ages and backgrounds of members of this forum need to be scrutinized. Most of these people have never seen the four corners of an airport but act otherwise.

30k? That can only work if you live in the North where the cost of living is cheap. Try that in the South and poverty will be your middle name. When you calculate transport, rent, food (which is increasing thanks to border blockade), cloths and other expenses no one will tell you to respect yourself not focus on starting a family until you are in a better financial situation. Let's not talk about the cost of raising children in Nigeria of today. All of you talking about spending within your means do not understand the realities of today's Nigeria. Poverty is real. Don't allow the 'go and marry' syndrome cloud your judgment.

Typical Nigerian mentality. The only things Nigerians understand are marriage and children even in a struggling economy such as ours. This is why the poverty rate in this country is sky high. How can marriage lead to success? WTF?? It's like you lots do not understand the level of suffering currently going on in this country. Gentlemen, listen up and listen up good, no woman in this country is willing to suffer with you if she can help it. They all want to be taken care off. The ones that do must have seen potentials in you that others didn't. If it doesn't manifest, they will jump ship. It's just their nature.

This is what happens when people who are not fit to be parents are allowed to procreate. Continue to sing "go and marry" when people clearly do not have the means to start a family. This is the result.

Not surprised about this. A lot of people aren't meant to marry and procreate but society forces them to do so due to the "go and marry" syndrome. I have said it several times that it is better to be single than to deal with this sort of rubbish. N5,000 per month is too small to take care of a baby. The woman herself is not mentally, financially and morally fit to be a mother but ended being one due to societal pressure. There are so many cases like this in the family courts. I hope a lot of young men and women have learnt from this. Don't rush to marriage if you are not mentally, financially, physically and spiritually ready to do so. Better to be single than to be a divorcee.

My friend, keep quiet. You are telling young men to marry in this harsh economy where there are very few jobs? Do you know how expensive it is to raise children in this day and age? Do you know how much baby food, diapers and day care cost? A lot of young people cannot feed themselves and yet you want them to be responsible for others. Are you okay? Are you going to pay for their wedding expenses, rent and find decent schools for their kids? If not, I suggest that you keep quiet and stop promoting poverty in the land. This "go and marry" syndrome is the reason why there are so many failed marriages in this country coupled with a high level of poverty in the land.

It's truly mind-blowing how dumb Nigerian men are. No sense of worth. No game. No balls. This is why other African women like us, they believe that we are very generous compared to their men. This same mug will find it difficult to spend money on his own sisters/other female relatives under the pretense of being broke.

truthsayer009:
BRO, the way this Men waste their earnings that they are suppose to Invest & spend with their Real future wives is baffling.

Nigerian men in Nigeria are just magas. That's why most Nigerian women feel like they are bigger than they are. Who spends N75k on a first date? Who does that? Even rich ajebutters aren't that stupid. This is why a lot of these girls see us as mugs/potential mugs. Op, even if you aren't interested in having sex with her stop financially investing in her until the terms of your relationship have been defined. Damn.

Bro, you are wasting your time. Nigeria is too divided along religious and tribal lines for a revolution to ever take place.Even with the deaths of Nigerians in S.A. is seen as a tribal issue. Everybody is about his own interest. Party affiliations has also clouded the judgment of many Nigerians. Many people will die for Politicians that do not give a monkey's about them. Just do your own bit and stay in your lane. Nigerians aren't worth it.

Compatriot60:
THIS IS THE BEST TIME FOR A REVOLUTION IN NIGERIA.
Arise O Compatriot's, Arise to the Call of REVOLUTION.
There is no need to fear again, Power must change hands. Spread this Message.

I am not doubting that humans are polygamous by nature. My issue is the hypocrisy of Nigerians mixing religion with it to justify their ratchet behaviour. You cannot have your cake and eat it at the same time. Islam legally allows polygamy so the women who marry them know what's up. You cannot as a "Christian" talk about how a woman must obey your authority when you cannot lead by example I'm not a saint but I find Nigerians as being some of the biggest hypocrites on the Planet.

quentin06:
get real this does not apply to men only but women also, humans are polygamous in nature.
nothing to do with church.

It's clowns like this that make women label the rest of us as "dogs", "scum" and "beasts". Many idiots here are defending this rubbish as an "African thing". If you hate western culture so much do not get married in Church. Marry under your traditional Gods. Don't come here telling women to "submit" to your authority based on religious doctrine but you yourself are not willing to do the same. This mentality is the reason why you lots end up being jailed for attempted rape in the west. Bunch of hypocrites.

The author is correct. Those arguing otherwise do not know the reality on ground. Gone are the days when a foreign second degree automatically guaranteed you a job. It's all about who you know. A lot of MSC degree holders are at home as they cannot secure a job. A lot of these firms hire children of the elite who are well-connected. Many of them even hire family members and children of their friends hence why it has become important to secure close relationships with the rich kids wherever you are. Government jobs are worse as they are dominated by the Hausa-Fulani. That's not to say that foreign second degrees are worthless. They still put you in front of the queue and companies that look at merit will always give you a chance.

You lots are funny. At the beginning of the marriage everyone was calling it true "love". People were wondering why an American girl would marry Gbenro when there were better "options" out there. Now everyone is talking about celebrities being unable to weather the storm of marriage. From the onset it was obvious that they were incompatible. Didn't Gbenro notice the party girl lifestyle while he was wooing her? He married her for papers while she married him to legally have a child. Simples. Osas knows that he married her for papers hence why she does not respect him.

Why are people surprised by this? Africa as a whole is a Paternalist society. Combine that with religion which in itself is extremely paternalistic then you understand the current misorgynist attitudes towards women in this part of the world. The most dangerous combination is the mixture of culture and religion.

The lady got what she deserved. How can you allow a stranger to spend money on you, feed you, take you out, follow said stranger to his HOTEL ROOM at NIGHT and not expect sex to be part of the deal? If you weren't interested in sleeping with him you should have let him know before following him to his room. To all the women defending this ratchet behavior, there's no where in the world a man will do this without having an ulterior motive.The so-called "gentlemen" will never allow you to stay in their hotel room that same day unless they believe that you are stranded. Only Nigerian women do this sort of fuckery.

This isn't about getting sex as an entitlement. Most men will not do this unless they had an ulterior motive. What happened to bringing your own money? You think Nigerian men are bad? Try guys in the developed world. They won't even spend money on you unless they are sure that they will get laid that same day. That chap was smart.

Thank you! Attraction is attraction regardless of money. If the aforementioned men were broke, no woman would ever look their way. Whereas Flavor will still attract women even when he is in his 50s as long as he maintains himself and remains financially bouyant. The problem with Nigerians is that they are overly materialistic and worship money more than anybody else. These men cannot compete with the likes of Idris Elba and Will Smith who are also well off.

pansophist:
Let me put it this way.

If you table Ned Nwoko with his billions, and Flavour the musician (he is muscular), with billions as well, I'm sure we can all agree that the ladies will go for Flavour. To reach a factual result, you compare two equals.

Do you in good conscience, honestly, believe that if Ned Nwoko, as well as Oshiomole arent rich, those ladies will marry them? Also, if a younger and muscular guy like flavour has similar billions, will the ladies pass him for such old men?

This is the problem with men these days. You should be going to the gym to keep fit and for long-term health reason not to impress a girl that will soon dump you for the next guy when she gets bored of you. The worst mentality is making money for the purpose of impressing women. You should be making money to give yourself a better quality of life not to impress a woman who will also dump you when the money stops flowing. All you lots talking about Oshiomole tend to forget that man is having sleepless nights trying to impress his wife. If he should fade into political obscurity/oblivion, Iara will dump his azz and move back to her country. Look at IK Ogbonna and his now estranged wife. He thought that he was the man and was shocked back to reality when the chick realized that he's not balling as he thought he was.

Lastly, women, regardless of social class, like men who are fit. They like men that have the whole package (looks, height, nice build and money). There's no point just having money if you can't satisfy your woman in bed. Your driver will do your job for you if you aren't up to the task.

My brother, UK guys have such a bad reputation with Nigerian girls it's not even funny. They like American guys because they believe that they spend on their women forgetting that they also operate a 50/50 system there as well The only difference is that America operates a pure capitalist system with a much bigger economy than the UK. The funny thing is that UK guys are popping in that same America! Nigerian women are not used to guys not spending on them! That's why they can't date guys from other African countries. Do you know how many Ghanians, Liberians and other African guys complain to me about how materialist Nigerian women are? Even the girls that I mentioned in my previous post that relocated to Nigeria after a few years abroad were not all based in the UK. Many of them were based in the States! My relation in Canada had to bring over a guy she knew from LASU over to Canada all in the name of getting a husband! The hustle is real my guy!

truthsayer009:
LMAO i actually concur with this. Most Nigerian women in diaspora end up either coming back home to marry a Nigerian because Be as it may. The so-named-bad Nigerian guys always have in mind that they are the providers and they work their ass off to make sure their wives don't suffer much except for taking care of home front which isn't really a paid labor.

A lot of Nigerian women usually have the culture shock of 50/50 dating even while abroad. They cannot cope i swear.

Ask Safia/Safitu who cannot seem to date any guy in the UK successfully, always coming here to make mouth that her Man must be this and that LMAO.

UK guys that are as stingy as goats. Their one Pound would not even touch your hand even on your death beds. You must work for every penny & dating is 50/50.

What lies? A lot of the girls I know from Corona primary, QC,Lagoon School that moved back to Nigeria after their studies eventually got married to Naija guys based in Naija. How many guys were looking their way when they were abroad? The ones who got married abroad are those who were open-minded and don't reason like your typical Nigerian girl. I don't expect you to understand since you have never lived abroad. Diaspora guys know what I am talking about. All those one you see getting married to foreigners are an exception to the norm. They understand the meaning of splitting the bills 50/50. They know how to have a bloody conversation. Unfortunately, they form a small percentage of rational Naija women abroad. They also spent majority of their lives there and hung out with a diverse group of people. Let's not even go there with the ones based in Nigeria. Only 1.5% are worth it and finding them is like looking for a needle in a haystack.

LillyVal:
All the way from the abroad to Nigeria not business, to get married, no black African or Nigeria men there.............. Easy with the lies