₦airaland Forum

I hope many people here are enlightened by the above post. Rich kids always know themselves. No one cares about the source of their parents wealth. Both of them were educated in the UK and would most likely have a lot of friends in common. They can afford to do trivial things due to strong financial backing. Don't stress yourselves over them.

This is what happens when couples do not discuss sexual compatibility before marriage or talk about sexual education. Many end up with issues such as this. Another problem is that Nigerians refuse to learn the art of pre-intimacy before sex due to religious and cultural inclinations. Not everything is about thrusting. Sex is meant to be enjoyed and not just some formality that is essential in marriage.

Bros, just admit that you despise anyone with igbo blood. Your racism is so obvious that it cannot be hidden. You probably hate Dora Akunyill, Kanu Nwankwo, Okocha, Soludo, Adiche and Achebe despite their achievements simply because of their tribe.

0m0nnakoda:
She failed so there was no need to reappoint her.

In our history no finance minister has had more revenue at their disposal as she did between 2011 and 2015.
What did she do with it?
Much of it was stolen
She failed to save and the moment oil price dropped she was found out.

She started to borrow to pay salaries immediately that happened

Her very first budget in 2012 saw the subsidy scandal.in which subsidy tripled overnight

She released stolen funds to Olisa Metuh, Fayose ,Dasuki


The truth is that under her there was UNPRECEDENTED LOOTING of our commonwealth and an embarrassing failure to DIVERSIFY from oil

Very good. I hope that he takes more loans to pay for the "expenses and maintenance" of the other "Honourables" in the House. Nigerians deserve their leaders. All you idiots do on this forum is talk about tribe, religion and party while these bastards mortgage your future. Even if Nigeria splits today, it will still be the same thing. A leopard does not change it's strips. None of these "politicians"give a damn about you. They use tribe and religion to manipulate you lots because that's all you know. Myopic people.

I can't stop laughing (what can a man do). Terrorists are rewarded with free scholarship abroad while many brilliant students across the country struggle to get scholarships and jobs once they graduate. The families of soldiers killed fighting these "reformed terrorists" get nothing while these lots are rewarded for killing people. Yet, Nigerians refuse to accept that their country is a zoo and cesspit.

I don't blame these "Honourables", I blame the gutless zombies who are too scared to fight for their rights. They know that you lots cannot do a damn thing because you don't know your rights. Been saying it for a while, Nigerians aren't worth fighting for. Anyone fighting for Nigeria is on his/her own. We don't value human life in this part of the world.

I hope you know that Joshua is a multi-millionaire in pounds? If he can be consistent for a decade, I see no reason why he shouldn't be as rich as Otedola himself. Also, cuppy is below him at this stage. He's a global celebrity who can date any celebrity he wants. Cuppy is only big in Nigeria due to her father's wealth and the way Nigerians lick the ass of rich kids.

englishmart:
Tyson fury will teach you to focus. Keep Shagamuing and flirting with a billionaire's daughter.

These men don't know. Nothing worst than a young chick that is not initially exposed. Once they get exposed (and they will) all hell will break loose. Too many pedophiles in this country.

truthsayer009:
LMAOOO Pedophiles walking around every where. That 17/18 year old from the village is the worst, those ones end up becoming a bone stuck in their neck.

Bro! I was shocked that he got so many likes! He justified it by asserting that men desire "young, beautiful and fertile" women over "ugly, old and intelligent: women. It's so messed up that you have men in their late 20/early 30s in this forum bragging about having a 16/17 year old girlfriend.Some brag about marrying a 17/18 year old from the village as "she's homely and submissive". There are a lot of mentally unstable people in this country.

truthsayer009:
He will die poor, because the dumb chick will continue buying jewelries instead of investing or starting a business when they get married.
Wo! nobody go tell am.

That's how we see am o. I do not take the comments on this forum seriously as most of the commenters are ill informed and suffer from poverty of the mind. A lot of people in this country are looking for who to control. People do not see relationships as partnerships in this country. They see it as "what can I get from you" type of relationships.

You shouldn't be surprised at what that girl said. Many of these chicks suffer from low self-esteem. That's why they run away from guys who are foreign educated and sophisticated. Same thing with the "alpha males" in this forum who see educated women as "feminists" and "poor wifey material". A popular "red pillar" here actually said that he will rather wife a hot chick that is dumb than marry a smart chick than is ugly as he isn't interested in her intellect.

truthsayer009:
BRO, this is actually a thing. For both sexes, they want someone who has a skill in those areas but not more than them, they feel undermined. Imagine a girl telling me she cannot date a Man who cooks like she cooks, Will he now be competing with me? I was shook.

Same thing as all these Nairaland Alpha males say a their wives must not be Richer than them, enemy of progress Men dem.

Every one wants someone who is good at something but not better than them. Na God go help us.

I'm not surprised at this topic. People are intimidated by others who are as smart/smarter than they are. Insecure people (whether male/female) like those who are not as "smart" as they are so that they can manipulate/control them at will. Female smarty pants are intimidated by men who can hold a conversation on their own, cook for themselves, can do their own house chores and exposed. They feel that the man will not appreciate them. The same way men are very intimidated by smart women as they are seen as a threat to their ego and would not be "submissive".

Only people who have high standards and are confident in their own skin that are not intimidated by smart people.

It all depends really. It depends on various factors: age, tribe/race, social background (sounds narrow minded but this is the reality on ground), maturity, mindset and location. In the west, the system is structured in such a way that you don't need much to get married. There are loans, social care benefits and housing benefits for those who are financially disadvantaged.

In Nigeria, the situation is completely different. You cannot ignore the importance of finance in terms of marriage. In this country, you have to provide everything for yourself such as water, electricity, insurance, health care etc. Women these days are entitled and ungrateful. If you cannot financially take care of the home, you will receive all manner of insults from your spouse. I don't believe in materialistic marriages but Nigeria is a very materialistic society.

As a man you have to provide for the family while your spouse barely contributes to the family income. Can you guys handle that? Only marry when you feel that you have met the right person and you are ready to proceed. Otherwise, stay in your lane.

Not surprised at the idiotic comments here. Nigerians don't even have emphathy for their compatriots being killed in their own country. It's not surprised then that most of these lot do not have care what happens to Nigerians abroad. Talking about "greener pastures" when countries like the U.S., UK, Japan, Switzerland and Canada have evacuated their citizens and taken them home. Are those guys looking for "greener pastures" in China considering how advanced their home countries are? This is why Nigerian politicians do not give a damn about the masses. Why should they? Politicians come from the masses.

These two are a joke. You have Tonto, a serial social climber, who believed that she was marrying into old money only to find out that Churchill was not all that and then you have Churchill who is only Obj's step-son and was living a fake life. I don't blame Churchill for filing this suit against her as she was defaming his character. Mother of his child or not, he has the right to legally defend himself from her venomous tongue. That's the smart thing to do. He knows that fighting her physically or verbally would only bring him down to her level and would work in her favor. Tonto will struggle to get a any man to marry her again due to her nasty character and poverty of the mind.

I agree with you that a person's character should be the most important thing but Nigeria or should I say Nigerians are oblivious to that notion. We are extremely materialistic. As I have said in my previous posts, the so called culture of "a man must provide and take care of his woman" has destroyed any notion of romance and true love in this country. Women see men who cannot take care of them as being useless while men brag about their ability to "cater for their women". It has led to the entitlement complex you see with our women. Nigerian men mock their fellow men who cannot spend money like them. This is why fraud and prostitution are at an all time high in this country.

jaxxy:
U are correct and I don’t not under estimate the power of money don’t get me wrong. Im neither saying u shudnt get money especially by the right and proper means bt i don’t think or believe people shud be judged or access by their financial status bt for their true character and quality. Yes many peoples characters hide when they are low financially and become totally smtnelse when then possess excess wealth mosttimes to the negative.

Those who oppress their wives Only Prey on the weak that doesn’t imply they are strong and that is a wrong show of strength.

My point is people who take money issues into relationships spoil these relationships because it’s no more about the right values bt money.

Money has its place bt it cannot and shud not be the most valuable thing in a relationship.

Bros, that notion only works in the ideal world. You forget that you live in a third world country where the gap between the rich and poor is bigger than the Atlantic ocean. As such, it is very hard not to be socially conscious. You are living in a country where people use money to intimidate and oppress their fellow countrymen. Rich men use their wealth to oppress their spouses all the time. It's just that it's more painful when rich girls do it to us because our egos cannot deal handle it.

jaxxy:
I hate all this money, money talk, I don’t look at people for what they have bt who they are inside. I’ve seen people with nothing bcom Smtn and those with Smtn bcom nothing.

Marry sm1 u have same ideology with. Period

Marriage in this part of the world is a complicated issue. We tend to mix religious doctrines and african culture into how a marriage is supposed to be and the result ends up causing so much problems for the parties involved. Nigerian men tend to use the religious doctrine of "a wife must submit to her husband" while forgetting that a man must respect and adore his wife as well. Women use the doctrine of "a man must leave his father and mother to join his wife and become one" to have control over the man. The African culture of "when you marry someone, you marry their family" does not help matters.

The key issue is having a balance. It is very important to have a balance between your wife and family. Another problem is social class. Rich people have extended family issues but it is not amongst themselves. Most family surrounding food and lack of space in the house is due to poverty. People from affluent/hard working families do not have these kind of issues. In fact, the worst thing that can happen to anyone (especially a woman) is to marry a someone from a very poor background. They are very parasitic in nature. Always want to take. Most guys from poor backgrounds rely on the "headship" aspect to reinforce their "authority" in the home. They cannot compete with their wife's family and as such, can only rely on the "alpha male" aspect to maintain their dignity. Women from poor homes are just as bad.

Balance is a key issue. Women in general are selfish and very competitive by nature. You just have to be smart when dealing with them if you want to have a long life.

Bros, I understand rich girls more than you. I grew up with some of them. Most of them are entitled that is a fact. A lot of them are rude. Like I said, the above scenario is a case of new money trying to marry old money. The guy thought that he had arrived by marrying into money only to find out that there are levels. I am in no support of the girl's behavior but the guy ought to have seen the signs from the way she relates to her parents.

While I agree that marriage should not be about materialistic things, what did you think was going to happen when you get involved with those caliber of people? These lots are snobbish by nature. Only their fellow rich kids understand them. That is why you see Politicians linking up their kids with their colleagues kids. The problem with you lots is that you don't know what you want. When you see the wedding of the elites, you complain that they are being discriminatory by not marrying outside their class. Now, they decide to marry outside their circle and you are complaining that they are too proud and rude? Choose a battle.

Do you honestly think that a girl who is used to being flown 1st class will agree to fly economy with you because of love? I know a few guys who are dominated by their rich father-in-laws because they were blinded by the glitzy lifestyle. Have you ever wondered why you would rarely read news of rich girls being victims of domestic violence? It's because if the man tries to exert his authority, he will be arrested or beaten up by thugs courtesy of "daddy dearest". Think about that. The above story is a lesson to guys who dump the girls that struggled with them in order to "marry up".

rawfact:
You have no idea of how uncultured and arrogant some ladies from a very rich family can be - as in, overly spoilt brat, who reasons only in currency, with no head to "su", let alone "submit" to the husband. The worst is that their dad don't see the need to do anything about it before giving them out in marriage. After all, there is enough money to cover up whatever lapses. As a matter of fact, their dad is their real husband, except in the area of sexual intimacy.

See, not every man is a gold-digger o. What is the essence of getting the business connections and additional money that the wife will use to nag your head off? Reminding you that her family did not only foot the wedding but also made you financially strong, hence you ought to do their bidding (technically, their slave). Even threaten you in places where you exert your authority as a husband. Where, every major decision in the family would be subjected to her family's conclusion and preference. And there is little or nothing you can say or do about it because her family is rich - heavily connected and could deal with you ruthlessly, the very same way they lifted you out of poverty.

Please don't get me wrong, this does not apply to all rich families. There are rich families that have allowed the word of God or their good culture to adequately regulate them from the "excesses of wealth", and they turn out awesome. So I think any man venturing such marriage should create lots of time with the lady and her family to really get to know them deeply. With this, he can foresee the blessings or troubles they would bring to him if he conclude to marry her. But I think the best is to marry a lady within your jurisdiction (grade) in respect to finance, age, and other important aspects. Marriage should not be a misery, by trying to use it to get more money.

If this story is true, (too many fake stories on Nairaland) then it's the case of a guy from a poor background who made some money and a rich ajebutter. Many guys who suddenly make some money feel that they can marry a rich chick and bring her to submission. Rich girls do not understand what it means to live modestly. The guy ought to have seen this coming from their early stages of courtship.

You cannot separate a rich girl from her family or circle. A wise man would have established a rapport with the in-laws so that they will have his back in case there is any misunderstanding with the wife. The advantage of marrying into a rich family is that they will not be a financial burden on you. They could also help you to expand your business or career through their connections. This is how several old moneyed families such as Russell & Bromley were established. Unfortunately, Nigerian men are too short sighted to understand this and allow their ego to control their decisions.

So, all the daily news we get of people committing suicide in Lagos, Ogun, Owerri, Ibadan, Abuja etc. Please, tell me which country are these reports coming from? The level of ignorance in this forum is astonishing. I am dumbfounded by the comment here.

Eagleboney:
Money : she get am
fame : she get am
beautiful looks: she get am
whats her reason for committing suicide now,this type of suicide report dey tire me,That why I salute Nigerians, upon all the hardships suicide is rare here, unlike peaceful and rich countries like Japan and co who have more suicide rate than Nigeria,
RIP to the dead though

Bro, it's quite sad about the mindset of women in this country. Women here have already assessed your worth just by looking at you! It's crazy.

truthsayer009:
Differences in Mindset: There are still ethnic differences in mindset which is enough pill to swallow already, an average Yoruba lady doesn't necessarily think like an average Igbo lady.

Your views on dating and Finance are different: Guy, just forget this one, you are paying 100%. Usually Men here take pride in spending for their ladies, It is worth noting that this usually comes with power hungry, control freak & misogynistic Men. In recent times Women in Nigeria are trying to fight the misogynistic part of this type of arrangement & leaving the financial part still intact but It doesn't work.

You will see statements like this, No time for "Broke Misogynist Men in 2020".
They forget that Poor Men have no right to be misogynist, they are already poor, poverty humbles you.

Dealing with her extended family: You have no choice, you are marrying most of the Family than the actual person.

Packaging: Nigeria is a classicist society, people already classify you immediately they meet you. Therefore Women here see it as "What You See Is What You Get". They don't even need to wait to say hello & hear you speak, once you analyze you from Top to Bottom, that's all. That is why those pick up lines you see on the Internet will only work in Nigeria when a lady feels like you are worth responding to.

Conversation: BRO! this one is so funny, Women only put effort in communicating only when they think you are worth it, not because they cannot communicate. All this one liner "Hi" "Fine" "kk" "You too" is because they don't want to speak with you but enjoy the attention you give them at the same time.

That's the whole point lol. Who are you trying to impress? Keeping a low profile is the way to go. You don't need to proof anything to anyone.

EgunMogaji2:
You’re spot on.

I keep a very low profile and take significant effort and sacrifices accomplishing that.

Pictured is my daily driver, I’m looked upon as suffering and not showing like I spent over 3 decades in the USA

This is the dumbest statement that I have ever read online. It can only come from a forum like Nairaland due to the level of ignorance amongst the posters. I have several friends from high school who are married to non-Nigerians. Are you telling me that they are foolish? Hell, a family friend of mine relocated to Nigeria with his Native American wife from the States. Marrying a woman comes down to your mindset and background. A guy who has spent most of his life abroad is more likely to marry a non-nigerian than someone who has lived all his life in Nigeria.

Most guys I know who went to boarding school in the UK ending up marrying white women due to the fact that most people in their inner circle are white. The guys who marry all these old white chicks for papers are the freshees who are only abroad to hustle. A Nigerian guy who migrated abroad at an early age (infancy to 16) is more likely to integrate in the environment and marry a non-nigerian.The same way a Nigerian who has spent most of his life in Nigeria and migrates abroad will more likely end up with a Nigerian wife as that is what he is used to.

Everything boils down to mindset. The problem is that the majority of people in this forum only things from a tribal,race and religious perspective.

donbachi:
No sensible nigerian gentleman marries a foreigner....unless him na hustler(papers).

Many of the posters do not understand (not surprised) of the topic. Most rich families in this part of the world exhaust their family fortunes within a generation due to various reasons. The Dantata/Dangote dynasty have been able to sustain their wealth through shrewd decisions. They married within themselves thereby keeping the wealth within the family. They ensured that each member of the family is business savvy and not a liability. They are financially prudent and are neutral when it comes to politics.

If many wealthy families (such as the Abiolas, Ojukwus and inevitably the Ibrus) had followed this rule, their family fortune would not have gone down the drain within a short period.

The fact is that most wealthy families in this part of the world do not last long compared to their European and Asian counterparts due to lack of foresight. They, like most Nigerians, are more interested in the short-term as opposed to the long-term.

Make una dey deceive yourself into believing that owning a car is a license to free sex. If you do not have the charisma to talk to women, you will only end up being used as a taxi man las las. I have seen so many guys with cars being turned to ladies personal drivers simply because of their inability to chat to women.

Also, it's not like that everywhere in the world. The people that say that are those who have not set foot outside the country or live in countries that are very capitalist in nature (USA). Have you been to Holland (especially Utretch) where most people use bicycles or Belgium where public transport is the norm? What about Singapore or Hong Kong where car usage limited due to population density? How about the Caribbean countries where most people trek or Japan where everyone uses the subway?

I am not doubting what the researchers are saying but it is a hasty generalization to assume this is the norm everywhere in the world. Not everyone suffers from poverty of the mind like Nigerians and other Africans.

OP, why are you surprised? The following factors are the reason for this nonsense: poverty, illiteracy, culture and religion. These four factors are the reason why Nigerians tend to have more children than they can cater for. Let's look at them.

Poverty: Most Nigerians (especially the lower class) believe that the more children you have, the more likely you will have a breadwinner among them who will wipe out the family's poverty(yeah right).

Illiteracy: Illiteracy breeds ignorance. When you are not educated, you will not understand the consequences of having more children than you can cater for.

Culture: Society tends to look down on women who can only birth to girls. The desire for a "male heir" is so great many couples keep trying to have a boy until they succeed damning the consequences of such reckless action.

Religion: The belief that "God will provide" has given many Nigerians the license to act irresponsibly when it comes to family planning. Most of them do not believe in family planning due to religious doctrine. They believe that God will solve all their problems with the snap of a finger.

These factors sum up the mindset of the average Nigerian when it comes to marriage and children. Just look at the commentators. They are already justifying such ratchet behavior on grounds of one of the above factors.

Why are all of you lots wailing? You guys keep defending these politicians simply because they are either from your state, tribe, religion or party. They will keep ripping you lots of because they know that there's nothing you idiots can do about it. If you organize a protest, they will either call you "afonja", "ipob" or a "wailer". So continue with your suffering and smiling. You have that "grills" idiot who isn't talking about the heavy borrowing of this Government. He's not talking about the money wasted on "renovating" the National Assembly. Yet, like most of his ilk, he is kissing the ass of this incompetent Government that should be booted out in a sane society.

Keep shouting y'all hear?These lots do not give a damn about any of you and see you lots as useful cannon folder. Nothing more.

My guy, Cuppy's dad's money means nothing to someone like AJ. That mentality only works in a country like Nigeria where rich people are worshipped regardless of their source of wealth. AJ is at the top of the boxing world which means that he can get any international celebrity he wants. Cuppy is too local for him.

lefulefu2:
above im league? dj cuppy dad get money nau

I don't understand Nigerians obsession to get married. I know that it's part of the culture and all but it's getting out of hand. Like it's the only achievement that people have in this country. There are so many issues to be worried about such as declining standard of living, lack of infrastructure, lack of jobs, lack of investment, the complete and utter disregard for the rule of law by the ruling party and the rate of insecurity in the land.

Why will men want to get married when the current economic climate is not favoring them?

Why will men want to get married when the culture of "the man must provide and cater to his woman" has made them rethink the notion of marriage?

Why will men want to get married when women in this country want their man to do the job of their father and take care of them even though they are supposed to be helpmates?

Why will a man who is either unemployed or a low income earner want to increase the burden on himself in the name of marriage?

Would such a person not think about the welfare of his future kids if he cannot support them?

A lot of marriages have collapsed because of the "go and marry" syndrome. Many of them end up marrying people they have nothing in common with just to satisfy society.

Gentlemen don't do it. Don't give in to pressure as those who attended your wedding will not be there when kasala burst.

That's just silly reasoning. There are a lot of Nigerians married to foreigners whose marriage has stood the test of time: Chief Gabriel Igbinedion, Charly Boy and many others. The most important thing is mutual understanding. The woman probably could not cope with his recent change in behaviour. Problem with this forum is that the commentators only see things from a tribal and religious point of view which is very myopic.

Bedwyr:
Problems of cross cultural marriage.

Marrying a foreigner means that the work you will do for the marriage to work is more than what you would do if the person was from your country...

Yes, they are all black, but the culture is very very different. Jamaican culture is not even the same as Nigerian culture...and even within Nigeria, differences abound.

Gauge you? Please. All they care about is your ability to take care of them. The source of your funds is irrelevant. There's a reason why a lot of them are used for rituals. Men who earn their money honestly, would calculate how much they would invest in you financially, socially, morally and intellectually. They don't have time for time wasters and leaches who don't contribute anything to their life.

How can a grown ass woman be talking about a man spending on her to show that he loves her? Very dumb reasoning.

truthsayer009:
Honestly you hit the nail on the head about "old money". These Otedola's & Co. invest their money wisely, live quietly as possible even though they hoe around with women, It is never in the public eye & not something they are proud of. Always kept it very lowkey.

I usually tell ladies one realistic fact, If a guy has the earning power in the 1M Naira range monthly & he buys you an iPhoneX which is 450k, this means he has spent half of his monthly earnings, now he would still be left with his own personal & family expenses till month end. A smart person won't do that.

An average Lagos girl won't ask you how come you are able to afford all this & try to do more research. Never oh, they'll never ask. Most times when women ask what you do, It's to gauge your financial level & know if you can take care of them, not to actually Inspect your source of living.

Bro, you are so on point. No self-made man who made his money legitimately would see himself as "razz". Such a person would not be caught dead with bimbos like Debota or Toke. Razz niggaz are yahoo boys, drug dealers and crooked politicians. They are the only ones who can waste ludicrous amount of money on these idiots without thinking. This is just the case of old money vs "new money". Old money is old money for a reason.

truthsayer009:
My Broda, as you can see Toke Makinwa is hailing her.

Let's even imagine this, who are razz guys?

1. Is it a person working from 9 - 5 in an Oil Firm that would call himself a razz guy?

2. Even if the man has no education & hustling abroad legitimately, do we think such man would call himself himself razz nigga?

Obviously the hood guys are the ones who are the Yahoo Plus ones that move money from USA to Malaysia to Ghana, then into Nigeria.

Have you noticed Yahoo boys are Razz, they dress Razz even with the most expensive cars.

Na dem

This woman has proven what I've always known. A lot of these women from hungry backgrounds are extremely intimidated by men from privileged backgrounds because they have standards. Guys from rich backgrounds are not freaked by money. They were born into it. They will not lower themselves just to "take care of a woman". Those "razz men" this muppet is talking about are cut from the same cloth as them: poor background, poverty of the mind, insecure, made money from illegal means and always willing to prove something to the world.

Men from well to do backgrounds should go for women of their class and ignore all these hungry riff-rafts. That is the only way that they can be humbled.