₦airaland Forum

Actually, you are worse than the OP and I as you, like many myopic Nigerians, acquire wealth to oppress your fellow countrymen in the name of being a "big boy". You wonder why slay queens, yahoo boys and ritualist are on the rise? It's because they have your mentality.

Many talented people have left the country because the country does not value their skills and input. You lots prefer those who have your level of reasoning: 'Who grammar epp?", "This is Nigeria not the west!", "Once you are in Rome behave like the Romans". Why would a sane enlightened person want to work in such an environment?

The problem with you people is that you refuse to accept that you lots cannot evolve due to tribalism, religious intolerance and illiteracy. As long as you have Northern almajiris ruling you, you cannot evolve. As long as you have high school dropouts at the top of many organizations you cannot evolve.

You talk about people in the west developing their countries. Of course they did but they had many like minds who were willing to come together and change the system. Nigeria is too divided on tribal and religious lines for that to ever happen.

So you see, people would stay and fight if there was a country worth fighting for.

As for Putin's comment, he's referring to you lots who make money at all cost at the betterment of yourselves as opposed to the benefit of society. Where you not the one that said that once you have money you can travel to the US and UK anytime you want. What about traveling to Calabar, Jos,Sokoto or even Abeokuta? Of course not. The people who you want to become don't even believe in your country. Hell, your President doesn't have confidence in your health sector hence his monthly visits to the UK. Your tax money at work eh??

Oh, and finally, the whole "keep being a second-class citizen abroad" is stale. You are also a second class citizen in your own country if you have to be rich in order to have quality and decent life. If you have to live in a private estate with security, use escort to move around town, run your gen 24/7 in order to have light and wear expensive cloths in order for people to respect you then you are a second-class citizen in your own country without money.

marvinsync:
now first of all I never said the op couldn't go abroad
second ,(again) I never said Nigeria was amazing
third u say I'm not thinking about the future
but did u wonder how Canada and the developed countries became developed? it's because people developed it infact a lot of America's major developments came from foreigners ,ie people left their land and developed somewhere else

u keep mentioning king do u think being a king is all about living large? being a king is having power to control things, to shape society . Have u watched "the men who built America" those people where kings , not just because they were rich but because they shaped society as u know it

Nigeria is the way it is because it has the wrong kings , tinubu and all the rest .

encouraging brain drain and running away is not a smart thing to do as u guys are part of the problem , ur just as bad as those who voted for Buhari and those that didn't vote . Ever heard the saying "don't ask what ur country can do for u instead ask what u can do for ur country"

haven't u heard of what Vladimir Putin said about Africa how an African who spend on foreign things all their life but then when they die choose to be buried in Africa like Africa is a graveyard

so when ur listing Nigeria's problems along with bad electricity, roads , leaders etc make sure to include U and the OP


now I'm not saying don't go abroad , no go and do business and bring it to Nigeria , don't run away , invest in Nigeria ,play ur role as a citizen of Nigeria , running away is a cowards move and not the answer


but hey u don't have to agree with all I've said I'll choose to become a king and shape society and u can choose to run away and be a second
third class citizen immigrant the rest of ur life

Mate, I come from the upper middle class. I know a lot of children of rich politicians who are still based abroad after their studies. Do you think they care about living like Kings in a society that doesn't work?

The ones that came back were those who could not secure a decent job/ didn't have papers. A lot of them could not get jobs that would match their lifestyle. I know people whose parents have provided them with properties in lekki, V.I., Ikoyi and they aren't interested in relocating back to the country due to economic and political uncertainty.

Do you know that a lot of people who are migrating to Canada are from the upper class? People working with multinationals and earning in dollars. A lot of people migrating out of the country are skilled middle and upper-middle class professionals who do not see a future in this country for their families.

Money is very important but if you have to be in the upper/upper middle class in order to survive in this country then you are living in a failed state.

marvinsync:
lol have u read the best selling book rich dad poor dad ? the poor dad says "money isn't everything"
the rich dad says "money is power!!"

no one is arguing that Nigeria isn't a bad place I'm just debunking ur statement that money isn't everything , money would give u access to so many things , I'm simply saying have money and u can live like a king anywhere, look at the way all these people are so desperate to leave the country pike their survival depends on it , do u think children of all these politicians think like this ?


that's why we fight for money and dont insult us for doing so

Nope, you are just a typical Nigerian that suffers from poverty of the mind. To you, everything is about being king of the jungle where nothing works.
That is why foreigners laugh at you people. No light, no water, no road, no decent healthcare, no infrastructure but you are willing to live like a King in an oversized ghetto. Let me tell you something: if you have to be a millionaire/billionaire in order to have a decent quality of life in Nigeria then you are living in a failed society/banana republic.

What is the percentage of rich people in this country? Not more than 5-10%. Where does that leave the rest of the population?

As I said, you think like someone from a third world country. It's all about me, me, me. Not about the future. Everything can go to hell as long as i have money.

marvinsync:
nonsense , ur thinking like a poor man

money is power , every problem u listed above can be solved with money , be it power or roads electricity or whatever

if the road bad then leave in a good area if it's traffic then be ur own boss so u can go to work anytime u feel like and avoid traffic


u haven't seen the lifestyle of some people in Nigeria , billionaires and multimillionaires are living in Nigeria , anytime they wanna go abroad they go and come back ,infact location doesn't matter to them , unlike the op that's asking where to go and people are advising against London and USA , Bosses like these can enter anywhere they want

so listen it is about money it's always about money

I blame the OP for bringing his problems to a faceless forum such as this where any tom, dick and harry can just talk rubbish.

Most of these ignorant people advising the OP to invest his money in this country are ignoramuses who think that everything is about making money.

What is the point to be making money and live in a lawless jungle where life is cheap?

What is the point to be making money in a country where development is stagnant?

In this day and age people are still bragging about using generators while the world is moving to solar power?

What is the point of making money where you are stuck in traffic for half the day just to get home from work?

Everyday you are dealing with drivers who aren't mentally stable and endanger their fellow road users.

The "posh estates" such as Lekki and many GRAs are nothing but overpriced ghettos which lack basic drainage systems, water and electricity.

The "I must make it" syndrome is the reason why Nigeria will never evolve as most Nigerians accept mediocrity and do not understand what a functional society looks like.

gloria34:
Even those ones are broke. They are d ones being controlled by their parents especially mothers and they must obey cause if they Dont, d money stops flowing. That is a broke boy

You say that but your likes still end up trying to date and marry them. You know this to be true. If the likes of Otedola's son or any of Adenuga's sons woo you will you say no? Reality check.

I am not defending Osas behavior but it's so funny that Nigerian guys are alway talking about "team foreign girls" while insulting and pulling down their home based girls. Well, there you have it. Akata is not going to tolerate your rubbish or "endure" for the sake of marriage. Gbenro knew what he was getting himself into when he married Osas for papers instead of getting to know her character. Nigerian men and women deserve each other.

Not surprised. These two were incompatible from the get go. See how people are insulting Nigerians born and bred abroad as being "uncultured" while the so-called "homely" girls in Naija are no better. He married her for papers while she married him for sex and children. They should carry their cross. When things were alright, people on this same forum were praising her for marrying him for love when she could have gotten other men. Now they are blaming him for marrying her.

ValCon888:
What about racism?

What about the tribalism you see everyday on Nairaland and Nigeria? We Nigerians hate each other more than the whites do but we refuse to tell ourselves the truth.

oblaak:
I still don't understand why people go for these concerts. What do you guys enjoy there? Please those who've been there before should tell me the fun derived in such events. Thanks

You people are just miserable killjoys who think that life evolves round studying, going to work, church/mosque and marriage. Many people go to concerts to unwind and see their favorite Artist perform. There's nothing "Western" or myopic about it. It happens everywhere in the world. Life is too short to live a solitary life. No wonder you lots are so rigid in thinking.

That family suffers from extreme poverty of the mind. Who does that in this day and age? Many of the posters here who agree to this manner of "testing"a potential spouse need to have their heads examined. Can the mother-in-law try that nonsense if the girl was Dj Cuppy, Dangote's daughter or some privileged rich girl?

Men in this country are sick. She's a leftover simply because she dated wizkid?? This is a girl with no scandal,does not dress scantily and keeps to herself. Her only crime is that she dated a bad boy which a lot of girls of her age tend to do. Tell me that your mothers and sisters never dated anyone outside your fathers? You then wonder why a lot of women from priviledged backgrounds look down on you.

To that C**t that called Tania a remnant, the women in your family are remnants. So because she's Wizkid's ex, she's a remnant?Many people date and break up. That's the reality of life. It's misorgynists like you that make women in this country act very snobbish towards men.

Poverty of the mind is real. How many people who drive cars actually own the car in this country? It's women from a poor background that behave like this. Women from affluent homes do not act this way.

Arielle:
No. Marry from your socio-economic group. Simple. Same goes for men. I've heard too many sad stories. Marriage is hard enough without the added resentment of one spouse who rightly or wrongly sees ill treatment on account of the other's higher financial standing. Work hard for your own money and success and then marry someone you have that in common with. We Nigerians are too wicked to ourselves. Men and women constantly fighting over everything and hating on each other. How about in-laws who will most probably see you as a gold digging imposter?? You don't need that.
Marry your kind and jointly contribute to the running of the home. Decide on who handles what: school fees, clothing, rent, feeding, holidays and recreation. If you have a project like building or buying a house, open a common account for that purpose and save into it. You can help each other out during the lean months. Worked for my late husband and I. It just takes planning, love and commitment.

I totally concur. People (both male & female) should marry their class. Nigeria is a stressful country as it is. A lot of Nigerians see marriage as a poverty alleviation scheme. Many people keep talking about true love but it rarely exists in this part of the world. There is a lot of poverty in the land and people from very poor backgrounds tend to have a mindset that can drag the other party down. You have to give it to the Northerners, the rich marry strictly within their class. It saves them the stress of dealing with someone from the opposite end of the economic ladder.

OP, the problem you guys are a having is a clash of personalities and to some extent backgrounds. He is an extrovert while you are an introvert. Your fiance isn't immature. He's just used to a certain lifestyle and wants you to be part of his world. Both of you have to decide if there is a middle ground in your relationship, otherwise there will be a lot of conflict if you proceed with the marriage. This is why it is important to be with someone within your circle/level.

I would know if this lady loves her "husband" more than her parents especially her own mother who raised her? This is the problem with women. Very jealous and competitive. They find faults where there's none. Why can't you love both your mother and wife? People need to understand that a mother's love is unconditional. You can't say the same for a wife. Your union to your wife is a written contract that can be severed while a man's bond with his mother is emotional & blood tied.

The fallout of Tiwa's marriage shouldn't be a shock to anyone. People need to understand that Tiwa only got married to Teebillz due to age catching up on her and with the intent of having legitimate children. In this part of the world, unmarried women are looked down upon no matter how successful they are. It's societal pressure that led to this. Nothing else.

OP, I'm sorry but your dignity as a man has already been bought the very moment you allowed your in-laws to pay for your wedding. It was stupid to quit your job for a woman in this recession without any backup plan. 'Love' means nothing in this country if you cannot provide for your family. You made the mistake of marrying someone who's not in your class. Let this be a lesson to men to always cut their cloth according to their size. Marry within your class.

Nairaland is full of ignorant people. I know Tania's family well. Her surname is Teller not Omotayo. Omotayo is her middle name. Her dad's Austrian hence why she looks the way she is but trust nairalanders to say that she is bleaching. You lots are really ignorant & silly.

While i find this post illuminating, it reinforces my stance on marrying your level. The OP ought to have seen some of this characteristic traits from the wife's family. The problem with Nigerian men is that they take the phrase "the Husband is the head of the house" too seriously. If you are that adamant to have a "submissive" wife, then marry someone who won't pose a threat to your "manhood". Men need to understand that as long as you marry a Nigerian you are marrying the person's family. This is not the West where marriage is between the couples only. Leave the rich to marry themselves. Only they understand themselves.

No parent wants their child to suffer. Sure, the in-laws should have given him the heads up. You can look at it two ways: 1. They don't respect him at all or 2. They did it from a position of love as they care about their daughter and grandkids. Marriages between people from different backgrounds only work if there is a lot of compromise between the parties. Niggaz stop biting more than you can chew and stick to what you can handle.

Nigerian men and their egos. This is why poor Nigerian men with fragile egos should not marry rich women. I am against materialism but in a society such as ours, money often calls the shots. Nigerian men should respect themselves and not bite more than they can handle. Whether you like it or not, when you marry someone you marry their family and will also have to deal with their circle of friends. Do not let the doctrine of husband and wife is one to the exclusion of everybody blind you from this reality.

Scenarios like this is the reason why Nigerians should cut their cloth according to their size. Nigerian men should marry women on their level. Men in this part of the world are too proud and take the mantra of "Head of the house" too seriously. I understand that the father-in-law, as courtesy, should have informed him about the gift in advance. However, the man should have known the kind of family he was marrying into. A lot of rich men will go out of their way to spoil their daughters. Married or not. Rich people have a lifestyle that is different from the average joe. Leave them for people of their class and know your level.

People like complicating their problems. Advice your friend to find someone of his level to marry. The girl obviously comes from an upper class family and is used to a certain lifestyle. Such people are not willing to drop their standards for anyone and should be left for the Big boys to handle.The reason why there are so many people get divorced is the differences in lifestyle.

It amazes me how ignorant Nigerians are. Why are you lot shocked that Egypt have some of the best universities in Africa? They have been competing with South Africa in regards to having the best education system in Africa for years. It's not a new phenonemom. They even have some of the best universities in the Arab world. As for those of you comparing the bottom universities in the UK to the best in Africa, that should tell you how big the education system is in the UK. An employer, in most cases, will prefer a university degree from any British, American or Canadian than the top universities in Africa. It is what it is.

Nigerians are second class citizens in their own country (the less priviledged ones), yet they will go about mocking diasporans for being second class citizens in their place of abode. Foreigners know that Nigerians do not value their lives or know their rights so they treat us the same way we treat ourselves.

Too many quack "Professors" in this country. What does Tuface's personal life have to do with his civil right to protest? Prof is showing his ignorance and jealousy. He wishes that he had tuface's success. I will not be surprised that he soliciting for a position within the Government.

Nigerian men are a funny lot. You complain about Nigerian women turning on their husbands in the states due to equal rights. What about the foolish men who brings those women from Nigeria with the intention of dominating them? Do you honestly think that these women's eyes will not be open after having a conversation with the natives? They will even be worse than the women there as they realize that they have more rights there than they ever had in Nigeria!!

I'm not surprised. Nigerians are treated like slaves in their own country but yet they have the audacity to criticize and mock Nigerians in diaspora as second-class citizens in foreign lands. Nigerians treat members of their household (drivers,cook, maid) and employees like dirt and are surprised when foreigners such as the Lebanese and Indians do the same without impunity. Charity starts at home.

I love how delusional Nigerians are. Nigerian Universities are not even among the top ten in Africa yet you expect us to be listed in the top 100 IN THE WORLD. If the University of Cape Town which has been consistently ranked as the best in Africa is not among the top 100 why should Nigerian Universities with poor infrastructure, strikes and all be among the top 100? The top 100 Universities are ranked based on student satisfaction, research, quality of teaching and infrastructure. Go to an open day in an European, North American or say Japanese University and see their prospectus then you will know why we are light years behind in education.

Africans with their conspiracy theories. For your information, these lot come from societies that have a high standard of living. Hardly any rich mogul from a developing country will do that when a high percentage of the population are hovering towards the poverty line and there is no government to support them. 2) Even 1% of their money will set their kids up for at least a two generations. 3) Their kids will have connections most people cannot even dream of. 4) Their kids have minor stakes in the companies they founded. Finally, the reason why africans are not in the list is because we are too selfish and power hungry to care about each other. Hell, how many family businesses are still in tact in africa? I'm out.

Anyone who believes this garbage is a slowpoke.