₦airaland Forum

meobizy:
To me boarding house is a big waste of both the child and parents' time and is chosen by incompetent parents who can't properly take care of their wards.
I went to boarding house and will never pick it for my children. I came out worse from the ordeal.
The best option is to send the child to a day-school where you can monitor their growth and development. If later in the future the child desires the boarding treatment then allow them. A child should enter boarding school only when he/she is physically and mentally capable of taking care of themselves first. If they didn't learn it beforehand then it is your fault.
In my case I quickly found peers who never studied or saw the point of it. I was bullied but never reported because the house masters were even bigger bullies. I pulled away emotionally from my parents because all-man-for-himself. If I attended a day school things would have turned positively different.

On the contrary, i would send my children both male and female to boarding schools not because i am not capable of taking care of them but because i want them to independent.

The formative years of the child and throughout primary school is enough to instil the necessary discipline and right upbringing for the child. Having the child still go to a day school because you want to monitor them is not trusting them to be able to take care of themselves and it shows that you didn't bring them up right to be able to take care of themselves.

I went to a boarding school and it made me independent and able to make decisions for myself and defend myself without always looking for mummy and daddy. All my 5 siblings also went to boarding schools although one had to be withdrawn because they noticed she was not doing well in it.

Parents choice of schools determines what they intend to achieve or instil in their children.

xtervaganza:
since when did being more cautious and careful equate to being better?



This is simple English na

Men take more risks and endanger their lives. Most ghastly accidents recorded had men driving. The ratio of men is much higher than the women.

correctyourself:
Not true; the number of men who drive are far higher than women, how many women drive 700km at a stretch in a day?
How many women travel 200km at night, I am sure its zero percent; Let for example 10 women drive 700km in one week you would b afraid to travel from the result you would hear.

Ask ten women to cook at the same time watch their favourite movies and see how many would forget their had food is on fire, lol.



Because women drive to work/market within 25km does not make them better driver than men.

Let's talk about to and fro work rather than travelling. Women tend to be more careful drivers and have less incidence of accidents than men.

Women are more cautious and careful when driving...

HazzanTazzan:
Very good composition...

As I said, I will sit my wife down and ask her what happened, if from her story, she didn't do anything extreme, I will sit my mum down, talk to her and caution her...

It should be treated as a case of domestic violence. Whatever the wife did should have been reported to the husband or her MIL should have cautioned rather than slapped her.

No one should be slapping anyone.

Wilfredpat22:
What stops the woman from paying for the guy on the first date and create a Good impression.

Honestly we ladies are useless

Make it personal...You are useless.

HazzanTazzan:
The question didn't say "if she crossed her boudaries"...
Crossing her boundaries that was said by airforce1 means that the mother wouldn't do something to warrant a disrespect from the wife which will lead to the slap...

Now listen... Whether my mum is gentle or not, my wife must have disrespected her to deserve a slap and a man isn't supposed to question his mum for that action...

I'd simply apologize to my mum without asking any questions and when I'm alone with my wife, I will ask her what happened, talk to her, correct her, calm her and make her apologize to my mum even if she doesn't feel she has done a thing to deserve the slap...

I will apologize for being slapped? That is wrong of you. You should be able to caution your mum also. Now your mum will feel free to slap your wife and even get an apology for doing it.

You also need to consider your wife's feelings. The fact that your mum is elderly does not make her above respecting others and apologizing if she is wrong.

Be careful not to breed resentment in your wife. It may take a while but she will explode one day.

jaxxy:
I believe if she can’t slap her own Mum back then she can’t dare slap ur mum back. It will be an abomination.

Wives shud see mother Inlaws as ur mums. That can’t be so hard for y’all.

The MILs should treat them as their daughters too and i don't mean like one least loved or an adopted daughter.

Airforce1:
I've got the best mom in the whole world .

She's soft hearted and caring to a fault .

Like I said in my previous comment , she no dey pass her boundary .

If any woman all in the name of love we shared disrespect my mom , I will punish her after which she will apologise .

Your mum will.probably slap your grandma (her MIL) back if she slaps her.

Even if i do not subscribe to your mum being slapped in return, she should not go around slapping people. They are not her kids and she needs to respect that.

If she feels like slapping someone, she can look for one of her children to slap. Some elderly people do wrong and expect it to be overlooked because of their age. Everyone should face the consequences of their actions...the "agbalagbas" ought to act wiser.

tunize:
Atleast u are woman..majority of women have dis kind of crazy character what she did was bad, like i said ppl differs and ppl handle situations differently ranging from anger management or mood control per sey..that is not a criteria to jst jump and conclude that she lacks training. Or u too still support first impression matters?.

I support courtesy...responding to greeting and being polite.

A person without courtesy is like a tyre without air.

stuffs4me:
I'm speechless.

She should be disgraced thoroughly and made to face the law.

tunize:
Truth is everyone approaches situations differently, and some times first impression really does not matter am not a fan of that phrase. Cos sometimes individuals can jst be in a very bad shape of mind."like i said ppl handle tinz differently. U're wrong, and she'z also wrong....nothing stops u from atleast greeting her and introducing urself too. And nothing also stops her from reciprocating ur greetings.(sometimes some persons dont even interact with unknown numbers, while some other person dont even care....seems u were out there trying to teach her manners not to talk.

I think it is also bad upbringing when people act up for others because they are in a mood.

My husband and I visited a friend and her family on Sunday and her son who is about 5yrs old didn't greet us or talk to us all the while we were there. He was carrying a long face around and crumbling.

Even when my husband and I talked to him, he didn't respond. His mother said that he was in a bad mood. If he were my relative or my son, i would have cleared his doubt but i just behaved myself.

That is how he will grow up and be aggressive and rude towards people because he is not in the mood. The girl in question lacks courtesy. If she didn't, she would have responded to the greeting first before anything especially as she knew someone was going to chat her.

Kelvin30286063:
All those baby bump were photoshopped too!?
I think this Kemi is sick.
Why will Linda go through the stress of photoshopping herself to a bed when she can easily rent a bed in the hospital?
Moreover, why will she fake all this in the first place?
Kemi's journalism certificate needs to be investigated.

Though this woman may be wrong. But I wasn't aware that there is an injection that women take to look pregnant while they adopt a child until i discovered that someone i know adopted her child. I even saw her when she was pregnant . I was in shock when i heard.

Enough of Linda and her baby. She is not the first to give birth and she isn't even married.

Shameless woman. A 15 year old boy!!! May God help us.

OldBeer:
I love hearing this type of stories.

I hope the daughter in law continues to give her hot hot.

Both mother and wife are alike...but hot and domineering. Now she spends more time in her other son's house and that one married an extremely opposite tribe

Gerrard59:
To worsen it all, OP uses one example to prove that ALL Nigerian girls are rude.

It tells you the quality of education obtained.

It is really disappointing and sad. From the responses of a lot of ladies here, it shows they are rude and would do the same thing.

That kind of aggressive response has become a norm for them that it has become a standard and not seen as rude anymore.

I would still respond to the greeting first and hear him out first.

aragon4realz:
I met this girl 4years back and one thing led to another and we started a relationship, things have been pretty well and we love each other very much, we have our ups and down but we makeup for it. I love her so much I could do anything for her and she loves me too in her own special kind of way.

The problem now is that am planning on proposing to her in a couple of weeks, I even stylishly measured her ring size and I have been visiting some jewelry stores to pick the perfect ring for her and also planning some surprise engagement party/get together for her but the thing is that she hates my church (catholic).

She is Anglican by birth but she attends one of the pentecostal churches which I don't want to mention,
we have been talking about this church of a thing for the past 3 months now and she has sworn never to get married in the Catholic Church and I can't leave my church because of this.

I even stopped talking or texting her for some couple of days now but today she texted me saying that "I should do this one thing for her by leaving my church" and even said it to my face that I should not propose to her when the time comes cos she will say no because of this.

Am just confused, what shall I do? I need help

Aside everything else, the wedding is supposed to be in the lady's church.

Why do a lot of Catholic men insist on wedding in their own church.

For this same reason, a friend if mine is yet to do her white wedding. They did traditional and now they have two kids but the guy was stubbornly insisting on his Catholic church but the girl's family refused.

BecaciaBarbie:
Nawa for you op oooo! Look at the way you aggravated the situation Shu! Who are you? Simple question.... "oh my name is this and that, got your digit from your friend....etc" but instead you created a drama out of nothing! You have any idea, what she was going through at that moment? Besides what Yeye greeting were you expecting? Lol you funny sha.....
You caused this op, you should apologize! You were very rude!

How was he rude? By greeting her or saying she should at least answer his greeting even with the sad emoticon?

Let us forget that we are ladies and be objective. Does she know what the person chatting her was going through also? If it now turned out that the person was meant to offer her a lifetime opportunity, she will now look like a fool and start apologizing like "sorry i was on my period"... " i was having a bad day"...

We meet people everyday in different ways and we should be open minded and not sit like a tiger waiting to pounce on someone that has not offended us.

Respond to greetings and give a listening ear first.

pcguru1:
She's not rude, the guy even sounds some how , you can't tell or expect the recipient to always respond well. Life is stressful the last thing I need is a random stranger giving me stress on WhatsApp.

That's why they are concluding that we are all rude. You cannot expect someone to start walking on egg shells without knowing the person has a problem.

Should we even carry our issues and problems on our head so much so that we lash out at random strangers not knowing how the person can impact our lives.

I don't see any fault in the guy. He greeted and she attacked like an angry tiger. He even joked about her not answering his greeting with an emoji and she still acted like an angry person.

I am a lady and i have my issues but if someone chats me or calls me, i put my issues aside and am always polite. It is called phone etiquette and even shows that someone is well brought up. If the person now shows that he is not ok, then i can react but not before i hear him out.

Statutory rape.

Please she is a minor.

"Kkk"... i hate this so much in chats. It kills the flow

SexExplorer:
I must be candid with you. Even though she was rude, I think both of you are not emotionally intelligent. Let me focus on your part. When you are chatting with someone for the first time, I think you should be very flexible and try to see things from the other person's perspective. Do you know whether many guys have been sending her unsolicited messages with the aim of having sex with her? Do you even know what she's currently passing through or her state of mind?

Besides, that's not the proper way to correct someone for the first time. Rather than acting bossy, you could have introduced yourself politely and let her realize her folly. This is not about who is right or wrong, but about who is more matured. Don't sweat it bro. We are all humans. Chat her up again and apologize for acting bossy. Doing that would make her feel guilt and respect you more.

It is wrong for her to be rude because of something she is going through or for some other person's action.

"Good afternoon" should have been responded in like manner before interrogation. It is a greeting and she should have responded before attacking him. It is common courtesy but not everyone is courteous obviously.

She was obviously rude and her family members do not see her fault in it because they are birds of a feather.

But it is wrong for you to generalize because i am sure you have chatted with "Nigerian ladies" who were not rude.

Pipedreams:
Hehe EMS. Where u in diamond bank before? I worked there before my current place. I wan die for there. Stressful bank

Lol...you were in diamond bank too!! Nice. Really stressful to work.

Treasuredlove:
This is an over flogged topic

You are right. It is.

Both should discuss how they should run their home. Communication is key.

Mothers just try to manipulate things and it sometimes works against them.

My very close friend had same issue. His mum refused his girlfriend because of her town even if they were the same tribe.

He finally married from a town his mum okayed and now she and the son's wife don't see eye to eye. She cannot even stay at her son's place when she comes to Lagos. At least her son did her bidding.

I think it is just best for parents to allow their adult kids make their decisions especially on life partners.

Indeed!! Your MIL will drink your breastmilk of all things to drink.

Disgraceful. What was he thinking?

Pipedreams:
Its monday morning and am motionless. God when will you make me financially free? My work depresses me no rest even on saturday. Banks should take it easy on front office staff abeg. What i hear daily is Target this and that, fee this, profit that. My female boss always shouting and threatening daily cos of mad pressure from above. Chai its a new week God gimme strength.

I feel you...plus those countless storms on Saturday...MPR, EMS. The targets are enough to reduce one's lifespan because of thinking.

I am glad to be free from the shackles of banking.The "armed robber" salary isn't worth the mental and general stress especially when you are in the branch.

stuffs4me:
This story is real and should be condensed. I agree with you on that. But when someone writes a fake story like the other thread and uses it to paint others in bad light should be condemed and not supported.

What people like you don't realise is that it's not a crime to be a man. That you have had a terrible experience with one man does not mean all men are bad.. Being a misandrist or harbouring any kind of hatred for men is not good for your mental health. There are billions of men on the planet and only you have to hate all of them. Don't you think that amount of hatred is a little too much for one heart.

I'm yet to see your comments on the thread where a woman stabbed her husband and fled. You and your kind have avoided that thread like a contagious desease.
I'll be posting the link for you.


https://www.nairaland.com/4736985/policewoman-flees-after-stabbing-husband

You put me into a lump of "people". I have never hated men or thought they are bad or trash as some people put it. So i don't know what you are talking about. I wouldn't be married if i did.

And it is not all "men violence against women" thread i comment on. And i have commented on threads condemning women's violence. I just don't know how to search it out.