₦airaland Forum

Hathor5:
I never felt sick, just a mild nausea. Eating something would make it go away each and every time which doesn't help with weight control. There is always something.

You are lucky

Hathor5:
The first trimester was really hard for you. Glad it was over after the first trimester. A friend of mine had these symptoms all the way till delivery.

A whole 9months of torture. Meanwhile, some ladies don't even have these sickens even in the first trimester.

This is just a one sided writeup with myopic points.

What happened to having a househelp? Most homes have helps, so the woman doesn't have to do everything on their own.

Many divorced women also get remarried if they want to. It's just that some actually decide to focus solely on their kids. They are more concerned about the kids than the fathers are. The father can even abandon the children with her and remarry but the woman will go out of her way to see that they are fine.

Divorce sometimes is necessary and may be the best thing for a woman for her peace of mind and freedom from a bad man. That, enough is bliss. What if she did everything to save the marriage but the man wasn't helping matters and decided to leave? She should force herself on him, so that she doesn't suffer all these your listed points?

My close family relative is separated from her ex. She works and she has a nanny, plus family is always available to help. Divorced mums figure things out to make sure things still flow.

Last week, my husband had to go stand in as a father for father's day in school for his friend's daughter. She's a working divorced mum without much family (only child and only her mum alive) but friends and loved ones rally around her to help out.

Maybe before you write something like this, you should actually study divorced mums around and not just what you feel happens, just to make the man seem.like the "victor" in divorce, thereby making the woman seem like the disadvantaged one.

JaneYave:
The sweetest annoying part is having to urinate when the sleep is sweetest, twice or more in cold weather's. Most times you hardly can sleep back immidiately.

Men! That part is so tiring. And once you urinate, you can already feel the bladder filling up again.

First three months was tough. Was hospitalized thrice. Constantly going to the hospital. Had to move in with my eldest sister. The vomiting was intense. It made me dehydrated and I had to be constantly admitted to be given drips.

At a point, I threw up everything till I started throwing up my saliva. I was so weak and I lost so much weight. No appetite. Couldn't drink water because it irritated me. Always hot internally. AC and fan were very important to me. I was always having saliva in my mouth.

But after I cross the first trimester, I was fine. No swollen feet, no big nose, I slept well, ate well, no saliva, better appetite. My tummy doesn't get so big, just compact and cute .

Very true.

stunnert:
Lemme puff this weed right here before I comment.

Chai so this potential filled, wealthy, energetic, prosperous, successful and good looking man has gone to his early grave because of ten minutes enjoyment. Nna ehn this is too bad

See I do tell my friends who're into this extra marital affairs game that if you gon play it you gonna have to play it smart because most of these runz girls can be bloody and greedy once they know you're very loaded with cash and have a fat back acct.

The rules are simple:
Never let these girls know your financial status
Never lodge in the same hotel twice consecutively
Never leave your opened drinks with these girls
Get your condom by yourself
Pay them in raw cash
Never spend the night with them, discharge them immediately you're done and satisfied
Watch out for any friends that come to visit them while y'all together
Detach yourself from anyone of them you suspect that she's into drugs.

Guys if you're gonna play the game, stay safe, stay sharp and be smart about it

Why stress yourself playing if you have to consciously tick these boxes? If you slip on one, what happens?

sapphiere:
Not always true. Chimamanda is a feminist. Is she bitter? I don't think so.

There's always a balance that people like Chimamanda might apply. You can't be married and carrying feminism on your head and in your home. Marriage comes with selflessness, compromise, etc.

The single feminist(maybe not all) in Nigeria think being a feminist is about being rude to men or challenging them wherever they go. Feminists that have remained married especially to Nigerian men need a balance. Or they can marry white men who don't place emphasis on respect and honour.

Besides, your example, Chimamanda can claim feminism in public, do you know how she is in her home? Does she fight to be the head? Or is she submissive when it applies?

sapphiere:
It beats my imagination when I see some women reject the movement. Like they are so comfortable being opressed. SHM

Why are Nigerian men so so insecure? Once the hear the word "feminism" their blood get hot.

Not being a feminist doesn't mean you accept oppression. A normal and confident woman will know how to get by without being oppressed by anyone, whether man or woman.

When I hear "feminist", especially in Nigeria, all that comes to mind is ladies with bitterness, hurt and animosity towards men and I don't want to be part of such clique. Not all of us will associate with feminism.

AutoChick4U:
The guy goes out to hustle and comes back to cook? D person at home will now sit and eat? Why nnaaaaaw. . I believe in division of labor and na all this respect yeye sentiments thats drawing us back.

Anyone who sits at home waiting for d provider to come back and cook is simply wicked

The "senior brother" does not apply when he's collecting money, it only applies when it's time to help around the house.

SoupEmbassy:
In Africa, food is the fastest way to a mans heart. He can get sex anywhere, but good food will keep him coming back.

Some millennial men seems to be a bit ok with the millennial wifey kind of fast food, but most men still love awesome swallow especially when they are at home.

A bowl of pounded yam, fufu or eba with a nicely prepared bowl of vegetable base soup can woke that side of him that seem to be gone due to everyday stress.

There are a lot of vegetable soup out there, but so far, Edikaikong Soup seem to be the real vegetable soup. By Edikaikong Soup, I mean the vegetable soup made by the Ibibios or Efiks people of South South region in Nigeria.

The soup involves a lots of preparation and honestly, requires one to be a very good mood to get the consistency right.
It's delicious, nutritious, and full of essential vitamins only when eating fresh.

So here's my hands down recipe from my grandma on how to make a tasty Edikaikong soup.

I kg 5 bunch of Pumpkin leave (Ugwu), 500 g water leaves, 2 handful Ntong (scent leaves or Effirin, I kg Assorted Meat, Ponmo, 200 ml (2 cups) Palm oil, I medium onions, I Cup of periwinkles, Head I Large stockfish, 2 Medium Sized Smoked Fish, 6 fresh Yellow pepper (pounded), I Cup pounded Crayfish, 1/2 Cup Dried Shrimps (slightly pounded), 1 tbs black Pepper, 2 stock cubes, Salt.

Steps
Before cooking, I like to pick, wash properly and allow to drain then slice all the vegetables. Ugwu, water leaves and scent leaves. Put each in separate bowls.

Wash you Meats, seasons accordingly and cook till almost tender, then add the washed Stock fish head and cook... Make sure the meat stock is almost Dried...we don't need water in the soup, cause the water leaves and palm will generate stock for the soup.

Before the stock Dried out completely, add water leaves, pour in the palm oil, add Periwinkles, pounded fresh pepper and stir properly. cook for 3-5 mins. (Ensure you don't over cook the water leaves)

Add in Ugwu, scent leaves, pounded shrimps, smoked fish, black pepper, stock cubes and stir the content of the pot very well..Cover the pot and leave to cook for 5mins

Lastly, according to my Grandma's recipe, you add the pounded Crayfish and taste for salt, give it a stir and that's it.(pls be mindful of the salt and stock cubes, cause vegetable soup can easily become salty)

Remove from fire and enjoy with Fufu, Pounded Yam, Semo, Samvita or even Eba.

If you are too busy to prepare a bowl, you can order for edikaikong soup online and Soup Embassy will deliver it to your home in Lagos or Abuja

Scent leaves... hmmmm

mbahdi:
bukatyne.God bless u.its painful seeing someone who should av b of help to u looking at u to die.
Those saying were u not cooking before he came.if u were cooking before he came.is it same amount u spend wen he avnt come u still spend now.if u are alone u will have it in mind u are alone.if u av a partner u sud also feel d impact.

The funny fact is that if he went to stay with a friend instead, he would've be cooking and tidying up and trying to be a good guest. But because he's staying with his younger one,he has to cross his legs and form boss, and people see nothing wrong with that.

Happy birthday. May your wife's soul continue to rest in peace.

This story is hard to believe. Why would they just kill someone like that? Are there guys there waiting to kill people that easily because of baby food for his child.

I feel you. Water has always been my best drink. Even when I go for parties, I choose water over carbonated drinks. Water quenches my thirst more than any other drink.

Romanoff:
I remember when someone on facebook said there's probably a pedophile in every family but we'd never know until someone is caught.

People bashed her from here to Timbuktu claiming "na your family get pedophile, speak for your family alone, God forbid" etc.

Nobody wishes to have wicked people like that in their family but the sad reality is that every pedophile, the ones caught and yet to be caught belongs to a family.

Protect your children by every means possible o. It's not easy but do the best you can.

It is well.

It might be true. We just discovered one in my family, though extended. He was molesting a 16yr old family friend that was staying with them. When she told me, I had to alert her mum to come pick her before the touching graduates to sex.

Till now thw wife of the "molester" is unaware and even the guy himself doesn't know that we know. The girl was just taken out of that environment.

These VIO officials are very wicked and heartless. I wish him a speedy recovery sha.

cococandy:
Every single time. The problem always comes down to their unreasonable illogical egos not rooted in reason or common sense.

If there’s food in the house why should anyone beg him to cook it to help out the brother who’s out there hustling to keep them fed, housed and paying for his education? I just can’t

Since he's the older brother, he can't stoop low to cook. Instead his brother must come back as the younger one to come and cook and serve him.

Humility is really far from some people. You can see a lot of them on this forum faulting the op for expecting assistance from his brother.

Please send him away. Such people are ungrateful and unreasonable. They will never see wrong in what they do or apologize. Send him back to his family and let them help him. I don't know why you are carrying his matter on your head. You have patience sha.

teresafaith:
Asi
It means beauty

French meaning - Beautiful
Hebrew/Spanish - Devoted to God
American/Hungarian - Intelligent
Latin - Beautiful, loving, lovable, graceful.

At least, it is Bela with one L.

Bella means Devoted to God

So what should we do? Is tooth extraction a new thing?

Yesss.

Depends on where you work and the benefits. I know someone who works in a multinational. They change their official cars, staff buses, etc often. And this lady has won about 6 vehicles in her stay in that company. Imagine winning a bid or a coaster bus in good condition for 300k plus and selling it for 6m. She has won a hilux, etc.

And it's not only her. But she's the one I know. And her current salary is about 1m. Sometimes the company gives their staff cars for their service or they put them on auction.

When this kind of questions the op asked are asked, it seems people think of the 70k job or 40 or civil service. People don't know that there are big money jobs. I remember years back, my friend gave me a cheque, his tithe of 250k to pay for him cos he was travelling. I held it in shock.

It's not only people doing business that can be rich. Some salary earners can buy that business. The business people try to make doing business rosy; the best thing to happen to man. Big lie! There are struggles and down times there.

Allow salary earners be.

She should use her full chest to sleep with the man. Why is she running?

I never liked the idea because I don't like see finish. Some even did it right from university. I don't think it's a wise thing to do.

Klass99:
Now, you had me lol . But does wifey relate with him well? I like women (both married & single) who don't take nonsense, because when you take it, once or twice there's a tendency for it to continue.

I know a married woman whose mother in law & sister in law, used to stress and harass her unnecessarily. So much so that, her mother in law pushed her head one day, the way you would use a finger to push a child's head for mischief or stubbornness. She said that was the day she had it and reacted in a manner they didn't expect, since then her in-laws dey arrange themselves around her. They don't try any of the shit they used to dish out prior to that head pushing incident.

Another lady, jacked her sister in law by the neck and pinned her to the wall, squeezing the life out of her it took the intervention of people present for her to let go. Her sister in law, was in the habit of disrespecting her and hubby, because she was the hubby's elder sister and this wife was a younger woman. She would do things that were not right like barge into their bedroom without knocking, talking over wifey and inserting herself into private conversations between man & wife, amongst other things.

I can't recall the incident that broke the carmel's back that day, but sister in law has since stopped all the nonsense she used to do. In my book of life, standing up for yourself and letting people know their mumu don do you, makes a difference in how they treat you .

They relate well. In fact for her last birthday, he planned a surprise party for her.

True, some inlaws need to be reminded that the wife is a human being that deserves respect. And sometimes, the wife needs to take the bull by the horn and defend herself.

For me, I am an unassuming person. I would just keep quiet but you don't know what's on my mind. But sometimes my facial expression gives me away . So they don't know how to act most times...lol. I drink water and mind my business. But they know I am not one to bully.

Everyone should give themselves respect and have peace.

Klass99:
If you see the way I smiled at this story ehn! E sweet my belle die, some mothers need to stop being meddlesome

As in eh! When he had his first child's dedication, the mum went to the church but from church, she only breezed in and out of the house and went to stay in the second son's house. The second son that married from an "opposite" tribe that she kicked against o.

When I got there and asked him about his mum, he just gave me the "you know nau" look. The wife doesn't take nonsense and his mum too. Meanwhile, the guy is a no stress, peace loving type.

I just feel for him because it has been like that for about 10yrs now.

Well, I can't really say I wanted a man like my father because I can't attest of his husbandly qualities. I am the 6th child, so I didn't experience much of that area.

But the qualities I liked about my dad was that he was a devoted family man, hard working and industrious. He took my mum out a lot for dinners, etc and he was quite free minded.

I see a lot of these qualities in my husband though they are two very different people.

bukatyne:


Did they give reasons?

Well, you know many of them would not talk with their partners around, not to talk of in a group. But series of relationship gatherings were organized to address what the issues could be.

SenecaTheYonger:
IT's good but it became toxic and pretentious. Also a lot of fake disturbing news and opinion.

Normalize this, normalize that. Everybody's got a "hot take" on everything.

Well, you are right.

I don't read every thread. And if I don't agree with something, I move on and don't bother about it.

But a lot of news and happenings reach there first, business opportunities, etc. It's one app that I visit the most.

She doesn't love you enough to part with her money even as she's seeing that you are trying hard.

Are sure you want to be with someone who cannot help you when you are financially down even though she has the means to?

iExplore:
If there's one thing feminists have in common, it's the fear of having to defend their belief when being asked to or interviewed. Reason being that:

•They do not know what they want exactly..

•They know the truth, it's right in their conscious, but they choose not to agree with themselves thereby trying to question Instincts and argue facts. And to argue a fact, you will need to provide more reasonable facts, which most in times they can't.

I've never seen a feminist stand her ground and boldly, without mincing words speak in a reasonable and convincing way.

A lot of them hide behind being nasty. Most feminists in Nigeria are synonymous to most redpillers in Nigeria. They usually use nastiness and offensiveness to pass their message across.