₦airaland Forum

Blessedmercy8:
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This is just one reason I dislike you Yorubas. Seriously, you people don't have sense. I would have just ignored you completely like I've been doing but I just want to let you know that you're referring to your mother who didn't train you well.

I'm done with you.

And the infamous bazaar queen waves an ethnic slur, pathetically tars all Yoruba people with the same brush. Shame! I support Tam, this post is unnecessary and self-seeking.

This is surely a threat from Mr. Obi. Who, then, controls the oil reserves in the Niger Delta?

This kind wife eh. She has already informed you about her willingness to sleep with another man, and your now apparent inability to get her pregnant. I don't think any amount of talk will talk her out of this decision.

It would be very difficult to dodge these family expenses, especially due to the nature of your siblings and mother. However, you need to devise a means that would allow you to, at least, save a penny for the rainy. It's not proper to be working and earning money without keeping some for an unforeseeable occurrences.

It's not always in black and white, neither is it cast in a stone. It depends on who is more broadminded, thoughtfulness, and knowledgeable. These virtues have nothing to do with gender but with the character composition of individuals.

Yes na, we have shell company mention. What of other big ogàs that are seemingly untouchable.

And someone believes Nigeria will be developed one day. Please remind their duties for earn such immorally fat pay: oh, they made "sacrifices" for the nation, really?

The same way our president led from the front in the fight against Boko Haram.

A super controversial god of men. Nevertheless, the attack and the needless lost of precious lives were barbaric, unwarranted, and highly despicable.

Who is going to restructure this feeding bottle federalism?

This loutish mindset is not fit to hold a government position. Thank God she didn't include the ethnic group of her interlocutor as it's her wont.

Ta! It's a women's thing; to untrammel act without restrain and moderation. It has nothing to do with an ethnic group.

What do we think? After you just wrote "sex with a married woman is a no, no to you." Continue!

Stargurl20:
You rendered me speechless.
Me wondering if this is how my own younger bro will be thinking of beating me up in few years time. Olagbara o

If you no maintain, you go surely collect. Now, this is a joke. Marriage is very important, don't mind the drooling hypocrisy of most Nigerians who sheepishly think they can copy the western world.

As if you would do differently if you happen to own a house. You seem to have forgotten you have regaled this graveyard with an unplesant tale of shameful reneging from business agreement you freely entered into, let alone a tenant-landlord issue. Learn to approach a case by its merit, not by emotion.

No, you don't love her. You only love the streams of financial goodies she bestows on you. The age gap is unjustufably massive; the fact that you are inexperience in the business of dating compounds your problem. Plus, she is a baby mammy, who, perhaps, is just pretending to get you first before she unleashes her real character. Heed to your parents' advice, because it won't be long before the blinkers of financial inducement are finally removed from your face.

There is a truism which says cheaters never change; they only become clever to conceal their escapes. Your wife has apparently validated this truism, which has thrown you off balance. It is either your wife turns a new leaf and becomes a faithful partner, or you man up and let her know the consequences of her action. The talk about not wanting your kids growing in an unbroken home does not cover the degree of harm your wife's infidelity has caused you.

Bring him over or not, I think you still need him, that's the reason for the recollection in the first place. Or is the alleged boredom Nigerian ladies suffer in Canada the reason for bringing him over? Ruminate deeply on it.

Anyone accusing you of being selfish is patently deluded and does not understand how gender interpersonal relationship works. Just stick to what you know is best for you. However, the inability to cut off completely from this lady, portrays a whiff of indecisiveness in you. Since she isn't to up your standard, why let her visit you at will?

Exquisitely:
I have been dating this guy for over 2 years. When we started dating, he had no job and I always encouraged him to get something doing no matter how small because he was always relying on his parents then.

He got jobs but quit working without telling me, I got to find out later. Due to these issues, he couldn't afford to pay for his apartment, so he had to relocate to his parents house.

He got a job in the same area as his parents house and he only looked for it because I told him I wasn't comfortable with him not working, as someone in his late 20s. As a lady, I try to make sure I work, plan my life and look for opportunities with prospects, but he doesn't do these things. He is comfortable with the way things are going for him.

He's been working for some months now but there is nothing to show for it, he is not even trying to get a high paying job, start a business, learn a skill or leave his comfort zone.
Mind you, I don't ask him for anything since he is not even doing well for himself yet.

This guy is proposing marraige, but I don't want to accept because he doesn't have a vision, neither does he have concrete plans or prospect. I'm afraid getting married to him would mean I'll be carrying all the burden while married, since he is even comfortable with the way things are for him now. I'm tired of having this discussion with him.

Please I need suggestions on what you'd likely do if you find yourself in my situation.

Going by what you have narrated, I don't think it's necessary to be around such a mentally lazy man, who doesn't think ahead and see his position as the man of the house. I think you need to quit now, because if you end up with him, you are going to regret it. This is not a ill-wish, but a proposition you are aware of now.

I don't know why you want to create a problem where none exists. That you were able to communicate with this person without noticing any deficiencies as a result of limited education, show how exposed and cultured she is. If she don't have first leaving certificate, so what? She enroll for WAEC GCE and get the certificate for you, if you are able to convince her.

I see a prima facie charge of sexism, of singling out one gender and pretending it's responsible for everything that ails marriage in Nigeria. If Nigerian men are getting "low" interest in marriage (which is actually wild and not supported by any empirical evidence), it's not because of the attitude of women per se. The number one influence of low marriage ratio in Nigeria is the imposition of western culture that validates promiscuity on the both side, and with BABYMAMA as the apotheosis.

Number two, the harsh Nigerian economy, the spike in unemployment, and the constant devaluation of the naira have conspired to make marriage almost impossible for men desirous of getting married. I know a lot peeps who are ready to get married today but don't simply possess the means. In fact, these men have women ready to marry them if and when they have the financial wherewithal.

Yes, there is an explosion of female prostitution partly as a direct consequence of decades of economic strangulation, but the Bible has always emphasized on the virtue of a man finding a woman, which at every age and time, means that man has to do due diligence and find a woman to marry.

Although it's a cringe-worthy, something the online pretentious herd will wail about and condemn, it's, however, entirely within your right to either consider it or strongly lambaste your wife for making such suggestion. A lot of things happen in the family circle, so make your decision about this proposal or provide them with another option.

It's difficult, very difficult, given the depths of what you narrated, to believe that nothing intimate happened, or is happening between you and the woman. Abeg forget and forgive my aproco!
It has been repeatedly stated that some humans are not deserving of any form of assistance. Now, see the wahala this woman sleepwalked you into. But brother, you knew what she was doing, but you didn't envisage her indiscretion would adversely affect you. Take heart. We learn and become better from unpleasant challenges, especially one we have the power to extricate ourselves.

There is no serious and actual incident that could justify your suspicion of cheating, other than the fact that your wife likes to flash her body whenever she is certain to get a spectator. At least, she has flashed her body to two male neighbours, in two different locations, which validates her liking to express her body. You just have to continue talking to her, if possible, involve people she respects for she suffers a psychology disorder.

Just tell them: I'm not going to help you guys anymore. Simple.

I don't see any difference between you and your business partner. One tells lies about his products, the other wants to renege on her words. The problem, though, is that you seem to attribute a moral quality you apparently don't possess.

garriAndsugar:
You can just simply ask him and leave us alone. That's if it isn't another unending tales you manufacture regularly

Please allow her enjoy the attention-- although it's usually fleeting. She needs it more than she needs air.

An after one saga. Guys beware. The young manis trying. It's easy to attempt to these kind of women.

Afodot0022:
Top of the day to you all wherever you are reading this my story. I am just in an emotional situation now that i need a breather and what to do to ease me of this emotional pains am going through.
I got married 5 years ago and have 2 daughters to that. For almost 5 years of marriage, i have not had any reason to suspect my wife of cheating cause she has always prove to be a loyal and trustworthy person to me not until recently that i started noticing some things popping up. Our marriage has not been that rosy and perfect as we do have alots of arguments which i have tried my best to make her happy in my capabilities. I fund the house finances and barely get any tangible financial support from her but that doesn't really bother me so far am still capable of meeting those bills.
It happened when i noticed that my wife started using password on her phone and she react negatively whenever i want to access her phone. Though she doesn't pick up my phone cos its also has password but i can never deny my wife access to my phone whenever she wants to make use of it. Anytime i want to access her phone, she says she cant allow me cos i dont allow her aswell which is not true. I only password my phone cos of security purpose. The last time i used her phone, i noticed she deleted a particular chat with a guy. It was the guy replying chat that made me knew she deleted the conversation and the way the guy was addressing her made me so uncomfortable. He was using my love and all sort of romantic words to my wife, i saw it and confronted her about it that i dont like it but she said he is just a friend that she knew way back before she got married. I noticed the guy just left the country to an arab country and my wife told me that its strictly business of exporting food stuff to him thats between then.
Fortunately, i picked up her phone last night and what i saw was so devastating, i noticed she was still chatting with the guy and also exchanging love words together. My wife told the guy that she loves him and also miss him so much. This was just a little out of their conversation. I was so mad and screenshot those chat and send to my self for evidence cos she can deny anything deniable. I sent those shots to out church pastor, her dad, her mom and also all her siblings to know what their daughter was doing under my roof. Her dad has been apologizing that i should forgive her but seriously am so hurt emotionally right now and just felt like leaving the marriage cos to trust her henceforth will be difficult.
Pls what advice can you give i do and also did i over reacted by sending those screenshot out to her family and pastor. I need to know cos am confused. Pls pardon my english and typo errors.

Sending the picture to third parties was unnecessary at this piont, however, the prospect of your wife turning a new leaf is very unlikely. Cheaters don't change; they become smater until they are exposed.

Pikin966:
Her Twitter account should be banned for such hateful post

Why can't she have respect for the dead

For telling the truth? That is why you are a black man that needs perpetual paternal guidance. That woman's hand is filled with blood.

Where is the hate-filled post? Oh, is telling the truth now a display of hatred? We know that most Africans don't know who their enemies are, but when someone courageous enough points out who our enemy is, we should at least be grateful to that person.