₦airaland Forum

Lostchild:
GIST.

I have a residential neighbor. He is in his 40's while I am in my 30's. He lives upstairs, while I live downstairs. He is a banker, divorced with his first, now ex wife with two children and became single again for a long time. From our conversation, his first marriage failed due to immaturity from both side. It became very difficult for him to re-marry because he wanted a decent woman that will help and build his life.

He had a lot of conversation with me about his life, although I never told him about myself. I just gave him few advice and prayed for him not to mak another mistake.

Someone recommend for him a young girl which he seem to like. Paid her dowry - traditional marriage in a hurry and brought her home as married couple.

She is like a fresh young fish.

When this young woman came, he was so curious about me which I seem to understand. One day I told her not to worry if I don't give her attention or always converse with her the way she want. I don't speak much in person unless it is very important, just to put her at ease.

THE PROBLEM

The problem right now, my neighbor is having serious headache. I mean extreme headache because the girl he married is still behaving like a child.

He just realize that he has made another huge bombshell. When he first brought her home after the dowry, I myself was secretly concern because the girl was just too small for him. I mean too young to be his daughter age mate.

Yesterday he was shouting and willing to lay hand on her or send her back home. He married her without courtship for the very wrong reasons below.

●He married her because she is young and innocent.
●He married her because he needed someone that will be under his total influence and control.
● He married her because of total submission from a woman.
●He married her because she has orange breast. We men like breast too much . We love to suck breast and she has nice standing fan boobs.

Right now he is seeing the opposite and not the character he thought he paid for. Instead of character and personality, he lusted after youthfulness and hot breast.

I tried to communicate with the babe, letting her know she need to be smart and acknowlege herself as now a married young woman. She is no longer in her parents house, but her own house.

Her response to me shows that, she is just a typical village girl who was talk into marriage by her parents. She blame her father.

My only secret worry right is that, her hubby should not lay hands on her, by hitting her. I don't like when a man beats a woman.

She is very young and small like that of 17 years old.

MEN will always go for looks and not character

guobe:
Nice intelligent perspective. Quite educative.

Munzy14:
Yea..Nature made a man a provider..

Provision is the responsibility.

And if you look at it in that sense, true true na favour. Favour obtained from the lord of which not all married men will.

NigerianAngelo:
I mean, you see many videos of parents taking care of their own kids. It's not like they have some kid our adult to help them out. Most times that's the case and it's true. And they live ok. Just a few may have day time nannies. But Nigerians can't do without somebody's daughter.

LINSAR:
Did Funke Akindele not throw her husband out of her house?

A man is dominant and a woman is submissive (biblically).Once a woman has more money,she stops being submissive.('unbiblical').

RealGandalf:
This issue of made ladies or ladies with higher income not being able to manage their homes is prevalent almost everywhere.
Not even in Nigeria alone.

1. Case study 1:

My cousin: she is well to do (so to say) about 1.4 million NGN monthly.

At some point, she said she was not built for marriage. Citing having to rush home to cook for husband, answerable to him and all.

Finally, at 33 or so, she got married.

They husband was on 600k/per month.

She wasn't cooking at least for the guy. She was against hiring of maid. She practically was doing nothing.

Only to bath herself, go for spar and all.

She was all about ordering food from vendors.

They will cook and supply different pot of soups and all and she will dump them in freezers.

Husband will always have to defrost and microwave before he eats.

She will shout at the guy and wasn't submissive in any way.

Husband got tired and sued for divorce and that was it.

She's just living life as she pleases now.

2. Case study 2:

My Aunt: She earns almost 4 million per month. Well paid and other allowances.

She's all about shouting at people and all.

Always trying to be the alpha.

Always travelling to countries of choice for vacation.

Had series of divorces.

Last one, husband in the abroad got tired.

Got involved with a cool headed oyibo lady.

They are living happily.

She's living alone at 58 and always complaining about everything.

3. Case study 3.

My Boss' wife:

Lady's got her own money. Cool business.

But she's got very terrible character.

Very foul.

Shouts and talk down on every of her domestic staff.

Shouts and talk down on Boss himself.

She's nearly impossible.

Oga decided to find peace and solace in the arm of a younger lady to whom he will flee whenever his wife start
to unleash dragon fire.

Truth is, it takes the grace of God to find a peaceful rich woman who will be a "WIFE" to her husband.

There are good ones out there, but very rare to come by.

guobe:
I have a very close relation that refused his wife from working because he felt if she starts working and earning well she may nolonger regard him. Is it true that when women start having mon they nolonger regard their husband.

FriendsAndFans:
Come o. There was a friend of mine that did the most seemingly impossible thing in 2019. He got married while we were both earning 15000.
Now in 2022 when i think of him, he seem like a magician. How did he do ? What template did he use ?
And yeah the wife was a Final year NCE student

how did he do it

Holluwatarhyor:
I've noticed most children while growing up are always more closer to their maternal cousins than their parternal cousins.

In my own case,I know my parternal cousins, but we don't talk,it's as bad as that.

Is there anything one can do so it won't affect the next generation.

And guys always talking about how you like cousins from your mom's side better than your dad's side.Have you ever wondered if your cousins from mom's side who you like so much also like their cousins from their mom's side and actually don't like you as you are also a parternal cousin to them?!

JovialJune:
Men are weak and very emotional beings, ladies have no problem with who their boyfriend/husband's had sex with, but if reverse is the case, you'd see men hyperventilating, yapping spittle everywhere, wailing non stop as if they've been betrayed and their lives have been cut short,


Oga Op what exactly do you want to know, that your wife had an affair and had sex with your friend? Oya yes she had sex with him, sheybi that's what your mind is telling you abi? Yes it happened, so what do you want to do about it? divorce her right? Do that now, you'd finally have peace of mind abi....

All these immature adults getting married these days sef

Verysmart101:
So how can u call the police on ur husband and still be answering his Mrs? Really!!!! No woman will ever try that shit with me and still leave in d same house with me never.Once I answer the police the marriage is over from there.

satandeterrible:
Your last paragraph classified you as a stupid idiot.

God2man2again:
There is no denying the fact that Husband is the head of the house and he controls the wife, however, the fact still remain that the wife is in charge of the kitchen, although the husband can help, babies come to the world through the wife. The husband or the man child came to the world by the woman, so the woman is in charge.
Also, the woman breastfeeds the baby, the wife nurture these babies till they become adult.
So, who controls the world?

The wife.
The woman.

Or
The husband
The man.

Discuss?

nymphomaniac:
Does the lack of catalytic converter affect fuel consumption though?

smestudio:
Hi all,

I hear alot of discussion around the topic of Car Fuel Consumption. Since we mosly drive tokuboh, it means most engine wont follow the car manufactures spec.

So to help us know if our Tokunboh Car Engine is fuel efficient or not, I would like to develop a template so anyone can use to gauge the Car fuel consumption

Kindly comment on this thread with your Car Make, Model, Year and your average fuel consumption e.g Toyota Camry 2006 N3,000 fuel for 200KM. Or Toyota Camry 2006 N3,000 Fuel Ketu to VI go come for 3 days.

With enough data will be able to combine the Data and develop a template so we would know if our Cars dey actually chop fuel or it's in our head.

FalseProphet1:
There's this mild drama currently going on in the family. My uncle died late last year (at an old age). The problem here is that they some delay in child birth, (7 years after their wedding to be prescise) so during this long wait, he and the wife decided to adopt a male child.

7 years after his adoption, children started popping in. They had a set of twins (males) and then 2 boys and a girl making it 5 biological children.

This my uncle was a wealthy man, so he had properties in the town of their state of origin and in the village.

Upon his death last year, the eldest son (the one who was adopted) sealed off the property in their village and claimed ownership of the 3 rental buildings in the town. This angered my uncle's brothers who were of the opinion that he's not family and therefore has no right to do such when the man's biological kids are very much around.

So they (the uncles) had a meeting with the biological sons of their late brother to get rid of what they termed an outcast in their midst.

They later invited the adopted young man to the village and used the community youths to beat him up and threatened to kill him if he doesn't stay away from their family properties. That he should look for his own biological parents and inherit whatever they left for him.

Now this didn't go down well, cos he used the police to lock up one of the twins and the whole family members are threatening fire and brimstone if the young man isn't released. They took the matter to the community elders who of course supported them by saying the adopted man has no right of forceful claim to any property unless it's given to him willingly by the family members.

As of now they have destroyed his wife's business in one of the buildings, burnt his car and have vowed to even kill him if he doesn't release their son.

That's why I brought it here. Was the adopted son wrong to have claimed ownership of his late father's properties without the official nod of the family members?

Do adopted children have right of inheritance in the family they find themselves?

What's your opinion on this matter.


Modified: I forgot to add that my uncle hasn't been buried because of this matter. His body is still in the mortuary cos there have to be an agreement from the family before burial takes place, and since the family is in chaos, the burial cannot hold for now.

bukatyne:
Nice one amongst many others.

So why are you only talking about monetary resources in your post?

infonet247:
A friend of mine rush into my apartment now crying....
He has been married for 7 years now no child yet but went secretly to the village with his people to marry another wife. Now he is asking me how will he face the first wife and tell him he has another wife!
I no dey put mouth for family matter, i just tell am make we sleep first. Tomorow i go ask nairalanders.
Over to una.

mariahAngel:
One dare not type those as a female on this forum. Males here would have none of it! Ike gwuru.

bukatyne:
Please can you look at value outside money?

As you saying if a woman is willing to give you all her salary in a month and she steals/lies, it is fine by you?

JeffreyJunior:
This is simple logic. If a man chykes a woman, he should first show her a table before asking what she is bringing to it.

Problem with awa burodas is that some of us don't even have a table but we dey ask ladies what they are bringing to it.

Ladies, if any man asks you that kwesion. Ask him to show you the table fess.

fineboynl:
Should a guy friend go back sit While girlfriend/wife to sit at front of a car?

It seems we have lost it in this generation.

I keep on seeing this happening. If it's random friend it's understandable but not a real close friend or a relative. It's not done from where I came from and improper.

The wife/girlfriend can't sit at the front when I visitor like close relative or close friend is in the same car.

It look like this act is causing serious issues in many home and relationship if the girlfriend or wife don't sit at the front when a real friend or relatives are around.

Or is this the normal?

englishmart:
If you were to share 100k between your parents, how much will each get? And why?

Me, I will give mom 70k and 30k to dad. Reason is, Mom needs a little more love for her enormous sacrifices. Woman has starved and done a lot of strenuous jobs to keep us going

Kobojunkie:
You are kidding, right?

Mindlog:
Please do name the visa type and the link to the webpages it is published on because I am getting to know this for first time.

Kobojunkie:
This doesn't say any of what you claim.

Instead at the very top you are told U.S. visa laws does not recognize common-law relationships.

Mindlog:
Countries like the US, Canada, UK etc, you must submit your marriage certificate to prove your marital status. If it was not needed,, the husband in the story would not be talking about going to the registry for another wedding.

Kobojunkie:
Again, the embassy works according to Nigerian law and Nigerian Law explicitly states that only marriages that are registered are considered legal. Only Nigerian marriages that are registered or certified by courts are recognized by the American embassy.

Kobojunkie:
Again, the embassy works according to Nigerian law and Nigerian Law explicitly states that only marriages that are registered are considered legal.

Only Nigerian marriages that are registered or certified by courts are recognized by the American embassy.

Mindlog:
Can you post link(s) to the US embassy webpage that reflects what you posted because what I have seen on their website over the years is presenting the original copy of one's marriage certificate and a photocopy of it, have never seen presenting affidavits statements as an option.

Mindlog:
So based on how they have been living going by the story (which has been recycled severally), will the American embassy consider them married even without their traditional marriage being registered in their local registry?

Kobojunkie:
The American embassy recognizes Nigerian law where immigrants from Nigeria are being processed.

Unless the couple in question are Americans or have had their union previously registered in America, the law that is applied is instead the constitution of their country of origin, and in this scenario, the Nigerian marriage law is what is upheld.