nanauju:
Some of us didn’t have that privilege of receiving allowances from our parents but then we taught ourselves how to save from the little we earned

Keep it up Nne, your children will be privileged. I didn’t grow up on trust fund but I will set one up for my kids.

Richy4:
I didn't know there was an "alert" in the 90s'.... was it Nigerian banking system or abroad... just thinking allowed

Lol the same reason why ‘alert’ is in quotes. Cash alert lol.

Don’t leave your parent house till you are ready to marry boys or girls, except you are been chased out or your parents are problematic.

Never buy anything you can get for free.

eezeribe:

Why didn't your mum help your other siblings in saving their monthly stipends.... Or was she partial in her relationship with her other kids?

I was the only one who spent same night the money came, and I was the only one who spent on what she considered frivolity. If I had bought a wrist watch or a toy, she wouldn’t have gotten that upset.

[quote author=bukatyne post=97616047][/quote]

Buka why you emphasize the Dad na? My dad really didn’t care about how we spent the money. The topic is really about how I cultivated the habit of saving and it’s all thanks to my mom and the suya experience.

NoLotty7:
Never been that lucky child at childhood.

You can make your children that ‘lucky child’ by the decisions you make now.

baralatie:

it is like you don't know how these women gbensh?
coook,nanny for where,how.if you know wetin cook and nanny dey do inside that house you will invite kgb to come and shoot people
bia regina go even arrange am so tey she go announce retirement.
regina is talking about premium gbenshing, you are talking about premium man.

Wo!
make God help us from falling into temptation o and deliver us from evil.

Samson for bible no be premium man nau,so why delilah trade his d.i.c.k for her money

Lol there are girls that will cheat even if you lock them in a basement, they will find a way. This ones are easy to identify and cut off Asap.

Now, there are good women who fall into temptations byvirtue of situations they find themselves. Some of them married as virgins, raised up right, even antisocial. These situations can differ, one of them being been constantly seeing and communicating with a particular person all the time.

You think Regina will risk losing Ned for premium gbenshing? You think before she said ‘I do’she didn’t weigh her options? She will risk driving a Lamborghini to go Bleep a dreadlock wearing guy she met on Twitter.

The only naija women who cheat on their rich spouse with someone lesser in means are women who have their own money. Again see why Nigerian men do not like their wives working?

mariahAngel:



If we had to collect all the money our mothers "borrowed" from us, we'd all be richer than Dangote.

surprisingly my mom always came through. She may not know the exact amount you have with her, she may give you less or more but she always have the money whenever you are ready.

Havesomesense:
were you in a relationship with a girl ?
and how did you cope ?

These days having a girlfriend is like having a hole in your pockets

I haven’t dated a girl that I took as responsibility. Asides gifts for special occasions, eat out once a while etc. I don’t even spend on myself talkless of girlfriend.

dawnomike:
Very good one... Saving and Investing

I saved so much as a kid... But mum would always borrow my money and never return it

You are correct. I focused on savings because it is when you have the money without things to spend on that you would think of investments.

Lol your mumcy la gangster. Before I left the country I moved all my funds to my mums account and I never bothered asking about it anymore. They deserve it anyway.

baralatie:

if regina isgbenshing will ned know?
he will not!
like you pointed that a man leaves his wife alone in the house for close to 8 hrs everyday leaves room for enough (30 minutes of gbenshing without the man knowing)

The problem will be there are cooks, nannies oin the house who would see Regina gbenshing, plus nosy neighbours. If Regina was going out to gbensh, she would at least communicate with the guy very often making it easier to get caught.

If she was nacking someone at work, they see themselves everyday no need for extra communication when she’s home, her co-workers also would not care about her family like neighbours would because chances are they don’t know her husband.

Lastly the chances of Regina seeing a premium man like Ned is reduced if she sits at home, at work she gets a wealthy client or her MD who is also in the financial bracket of Ned but better looking and charismatic has more potential in making her cheat than boys she sees on social media.

When I was growing up in the 90’s, my dad decided he would put his kids on a monthly allowance. This was in 1999, my allowance was 500 naira.

The first time we got the ‘alert’ was a Saturday evening, I quickly took out #50 for flexing, I headed to the aboki at the juncture to buy suya.

Now in 1999 suya price started at #10 for a sizeable portion, I bought x 5 of a sizeable portion. I went home anticipating how I would devour my suya before going to bed.

On getting home my mum asked ‘what did you buy’? I pulled the suya out of the plastic bag and she looked at me like I murdered two people. She would take me back to the aboki to question him on why he would sell #50 suya to a kid. Of course sliced suya could not be returned so we took it back home. She seized the suya, gave me the hottest abaras I ever received. I slept after crying.

The next morning she gave me the talk. Our conversation went this;

Mum: how much is your allowance?

Me: #500

Mum:How much did you spend last night?

Me: #50.

Mum: If you spend #50 every night how long will your allowance last?

Me: Ten days

Mum: If your dad spent his salary in ten days where will your allowance, pocket money and school fees come from?

Me: dumbfounded

She gave me back my now cold suya. Collected the remaining of my allowance, handed 100 naira to me for the rest of the month.

The next allowance, I took out #100 and handed #400 over to her and that would continue till I finished primary school. At my graduation my mum bought a BMX bicycle and a white trainers from my savings. I became the first child in my family to own an asset paid for from pocket.

When I got into secondary school, saving was already an habit. I remember my siblings coming to collect money for fuel and food from me, ‘we need fuel borrow us 1k daddy will refund you when he comes’. Some times my dad would owe me to the tune of 10,000 naira then refund me in lump sum.

When I finished serving, I had over #700,000 in my bank account all from savings. No income asides NYSC & PPA allawee.

Currently, I have saved about 90% of my salary since 2015, then using the lump sum for something good. When I bought my house in 2018 I had 46% in down payment, as against the customary 5%. I have never bought a car with bank financing. All these because I don’t spend on the things I don’t need.

That advice made a huge impact in my life.

Cultivate the habit of saving this new year. The flexing, the expensive vacations, hair cuts, fancy designers you pass on today will make a difference in your life in the long run.

Happy New year my peoples.

baralatie:

Wether you want to call it office romance or compound romance or church romance or mosque romance infidelity is infedility ad it can come in various forms and shades.
The thing is when these relationships result into childbirth that is been fathered unknown till a dna is carried or sickness.
I know of Aman who is father to 4 children in another married couples home.there is another one in anambra where the husband committed suicide because his wife 4 kids who are in university are not his or odartey lamprey whose 4 kids are not his.
Once a woman gets pregnant from another man to her husband (problem).
So saying a wife should not work because of Bleep will not hold .
Rather the man should pray that the wife should be shielded from the dip of the day.

All cases of the woman bringing a outsourced child into a marriage has the following
The husband in the house is not fertile as of yet
The husband is in a battle for the wife
The wife has problem with choice
The relationship comes with opposition

And so on and so forth

Lol I didn’t say a woman should not work. I said most Nigerian men do not like their wives working. Have you seen any wealthy man with a working wife? You think the likes of Ned Nwoko will let Regina go the 9 - 5 route?

A non working wife will not eliminate the chances of cheating, it however reduces it by far. The idea of seeing someone you like for 8 hours everyday increases the chances of getting entangled.

baralatie:

That is not even solving the problem.it is making the problem act fast

Lol it’s not going to solve the problem but it’s part of the problem. Office relationships are very discreet, it’s harder catching someone involved in an office affair.

The office couple spends more time with themselves than they do with their partners at home.

There are lot of women who would not risk cheating in their neighbourhood or churches because of the rumours.

It is also easier to meet people in position of power/attractive people at work than it is on your street or elsewhere.

This is why most Nigerian men don’t like their wives working. It is almost impossible for a woman to resist a man with power and influence, especially when it comes with charisma, charm and money.

It is also not about knowing your partner, this woman could have married as a virgin, be an active church member etc before marriage, you think you can’t do certain things until you are tested with those situations.

The importance of a DNA test cannot be overemphasized, if he did the test for the first child the second wouldn’t have happened.

You go through mild heartbreak when you catch a cheating partner and show her the door than when a cheating partner does the break up.

Lol.

Lol the girls in the group were talking about black men, not Nigerian men. There are Jamaican men, Sudanese men etc that may leak ass, Naija men are in demand abroad.

Now back to your topic - I will highlight the differences in been with a white woman and a typical African woman, both pro and cons.

Pros of a white woman over an African woman;

Independence - The average white woman is able and willing to provide for herself and in some cases her man too without grumbling, that’s a taboo for an African woman.

Commitment: you can meet a white lady, talk a few hours and start having seex, continue your relationship for years without her wanting more than what you have. The average African woman wants you to meet her family after 2 weeks relationship.

Hypergamy: The average white woman who is a 9 can settle with a guy who’s a 5 and love him to death, you see this model looking dressed to kill beauty holding the hands of a pot belly, slippers wearing chubby cheeks geek strolling in the mall. The African woman would never lol. A 9 wants to date a 29.

Loyalty: An average white girl in a relationship does not exchange her number with any new guy, you approach her for a conversation she tells you immediately ‘ I have a bf’. She cuts off her male friends when she starts dating. The African woman continues to keep her friends and make new ones. To her they are just friends, but we all know 80% of your male friends wants to hit, 18% of the rest would not say no if you offer it to them.


Cons of dating a white chick;

The white chick isn’t as clean as the African chick. The average African chick takes good care of herself, the white chick is very casual, they also have a peculiar white girl smell, not really foul odour but just white smell.

It’s more interesting dating someone you share a lot with from upbringing to experiences. There are some inner jokes you have to explain to a white girl and vice versa. The Nigeria girl with get it immediately.

P.S I have only dated African girls, 1 Nigerian, 1 Cameroonian, 1 Ghanaian and a brief entanglement with a senagalese. All the white girls I have been with were fwb, flings, casual relationships etc.

Most realistic way to me is working on your mind. Listen to people like Napoleon Hill and Earl Nightingale on YouTube everyday, practice what they teach you everyday. Once your mind is renewed and you have the abundance attitude, the physical will manifest on its own accord.

P.S: I started listening to those guy this year and it has made a huge difference in my life.

Like other people advised, check the express entry route. It's not necessary to learn french, with your education and work experience you are very likely to qualify.

When you get to Canada make sure you go to school, even if its an eight month diploma, having Canadian education helps you land a better job faster.

You can also look at coming to study and then bringing your family after settling. Coming with your family may make you desperate to take on menial jobs to survive, better to come alone, do a two years Msc or MBA or PhD, get a three year post graduate work permit, big organizations are always recruiting from top institutions.

If you absolutely have to come with your family, you will need more than your 8m savings, you need a bigger house, daycare for the kids etc.

OP, the only reason you don’t hear much about men complaining about their father in-laws is because men are logical. It’s not because our fathers treated our mothers badly.

Personally, the only way I will think my wife puts her dad before me is if she sleeps with her dad, and I’m sure it’s the same for most guys.

There’s really no logical way a man can put his mom above his wife, it’s you women who engage in unnecessary comparison.

There are many women who are bread winners of their extended families, they work, pay their brothers fee, take care of their parents but leave the responsibilities of provision for their immediate family to their husbands, and the husbands are proud of them.

A man buys his mom a car and it’s a problem, he buys your mum a car and he’s a good husband. I’m not putting the blame on just wives, some mothers can be trouble too. All I’m saying is it’s a woman’s thing to be jealous over trivial things, most men don’t have such problems.

I’m a man and I do not choose to fall in love. It just happens. Sometimes I see someone, I just want a good time, basically sex, then we get talking, feelings starts developing, you think of them often, you want to see them or talk to them all the time, there’s an emotion beneath void of any logic, you stay up longer than your sleep hours to talk to them even when you know you have to wake up early the next day.

Just as we do not decide to think, feel pain, feel anger, disappointment etc these are automatic response to stimuli, so is love. You can consciously decide not to fall in love, but you can’t conciously decide to fall in love, then the love will be fake.

Now this is only for eros love or romantic love.

There is nothing wrong with women proposing to men. However, will a woman be able to take the shame of her boyfriend saying NO? Most women once they get to age 23 and have a serious relationship are ready to get married, Men know the timing of a woman’s readiness.

On the other hand how will a woman know a guy is ready to settle? It’s far more difficult to estimate a guy’s ready time. So most proposals will end in a NO.

Women already ‘propose’ to men by asking us the ‘when are we getting married’ question, ‘I’m not getting younger’ statement or constantly bugging us to go see their parents etc. Adding going down on one kneel to this makes them come off as desperate.

Brunosamel:
this first thing I did was to apologize, told her there's nothing going on between our two but she didn't care at all, she broke up with me via sms... Please is there anything wrong this sms

If you see a text like this on her phone telling another guy what you told comfort, how will you react? Cheating isn’t until you sleep with the other girl. The other girl is clearly talking like you are asking her out and your reply didn’t say otherwise.

To answer your question, everything is wrong with that text. Now you can focus on comfort.

You made a post about finding the redpill constitution on October 4, 1 week later your girlfriend dumped you.

You are hurt but masking your hurt under the thought of let me focus on my life, you forgot to focus on your life till you got dumped? You won’t focus on your life, she will move on and you will also start looking for someone else to show you can move on too, but whatever you find will end again, till you fix your thought.

Your girl found an implicating text on your phone, instead of you to apologize or explain to her you tell her she will regret leaving you, are you Jeff Bezos?

This is just the beginning of series of heartbreak for you. The redpill teaches you how to treat women like trash, they don’t teach you how to deal with the resulting heartbreak.

The earlier you know most of these redpill guys are just good writers the better for you, most do not practice what they tell you. This is why young people should stay off social media, TV or anything that can adversely influence them.

Like the name implies ‘friends with benefits’ are friends who starts fucking, usually it starts with friendship and then you both decide to start nacking.

So start with your female friends, your bestie, start talking raw around them, then start being playful, pretend kisses, rub their hair, arms. If they allow that then proceed to playfully touching legs, thighs, Laps. If they allow that then you can move to ass and boobs.

Key word is to do it playfully, if they reject your moves, apologize, turn it to play and move on, continue being friends though.

Another sure way is to have money, lot of girls will want to date you, but you tell them you aren’t into relationships. Most of them will stick around with the hope that they can win you over. The period when they are trying to win you over you just keep having casual, no commitment sex.

They will walk when they realize there’s no hope for a relationship.

if You beg to have someone, you will beg to keep them.

You are already aware that the relationship isn’t beneficial to you, so just drop it. It’s not time to learn about how not to be a simp.

Dump her and learn your lesson, don’t beg or buy your next girlfriend.

No! Physical attributes can not solely make a successful marriage. Once you have the object of your attraction, the attraction begins to wane. So the once pretty body and face soon becomes regular because you see it everyday.

Relationships are kept by benefits, once a relationship is no longer beneficial then the other thing that can keep it is religion/faith/spirituality.

As long as you are doing for your partner what they can’t do by themselves and they can’t get outside easily, you are 80% guaranteed to keep your relationship.

No one can avoid been cheated on in a relationship/marriage. You are not responsible for the cheaters actions, whether you are rich or poor , fit or obese, man or woman, never let anyone tell you it’s your fault that they cheated.

Why are you trying to control what she posts on her status though? You think she does it to get to you then you make it get to you, so her toxicity is making you toxic. She’s succeeding in turning you into a complainer and nag.

If you know her status gets to you, block her from seeing your status, that way you don’t see hers either. I know posting about such is therapeutic to most girls, they feel better when they do. So basically you are angry that your girlfriend wants to feel better.

At 32 your gf wants marriage ASAP, if you don’t see yourself marrying by mid next year please let her go, you don’t need that kind of pressure in your life. Once a naija girl hits 25 she doesn’t have more than 2 years to spare in a relationship.

Even after all the insults she dished out to him, and this is who people call alpha male?

faithfull18:

Formalised relationship you can't be opting out or in at any slight misunderstanding.

What you call slight misunderstanding is obviously a major issue to the OP. His peace of mind is eroded and the only way he can get it back right now is through separation.

Except you tried semen retention and it didn’t work for you, you can’t say it doesn’t work. There are many ways to make a fortune, a footballer giving you advise on how to make money will be different from what businessman will tell you, which will also be different from what a pastor tells you. It is your prerogative to pick one or non at all, but you can’t say it doesn’t work especially when so many people have said it does.

When someone says things start working out for them after they tried semen retention it doesn’t mean they went from broke to billionaire, it could mean they got a job, they got a raise, a gift, something they have wanted for long showed up in the same week etc.

I have no interest in joining the challenge but I can’t say it doesn’t work when there are a lot of people testifying to it’s effectiveness.