₦airaland Forum

maasoap:
Personally, I believe you're lying. Who would defend men committing this kind of atrocity? Sometimes, blaming the victims (which I don't do) might make it look like one is defending the perpetrators but it is not the same.


I guess the guy posting rubbish on Facebook didn't know the facts, he just assumed. Going by his post, he said he read that the bf is a yahoo boy. No man would blame a woman trying to build something with her struggling partner.


You're a men hater, you didn't have to hide under the misguided posts from one uninformed boy. Come out plainly and let's know you for what you are, there are many like you here and they don't hide under anything like you're doing here

Refusing to call out the culprits and instead calling out women when men commit crime is implicitly defending them. Only a shallow minded person wouldn't see that.

Yes, it's one misinformed guy on Facebook. And you don't want me to use his utterances to judge men. That's both noble and adorable. The only problem is that blaming women when they're murdered or hurt by men while shying away from holding men accountable did not start with this singular individual. It's a common occurrence on this platform. And I made it very clear in the first sentence of the comment you quoted that I was referring to a specific group of men characterized by the comments I listed up there. I said that so that no one would assume I was basing my comment on the submission of that Facebook user alone or that I was attacking the entire male gender, but here we are anyway. Isn't funny that guys on here blame or advicewomen based on what happened to this singular girl in question, but I can't address men based on the comment of this singular Facebook user? Why don't you tell them it's one misguided girl that doesn't represent women?

As for your last paragraph, it made me laugh out loud because it only goes to show what I was saying. For you guys, it's all about herds. To you, if I'm calling out men, then I must be a woman. You can't even imagine the possibility of a men holding other men accountable. Well, sorry to disappoint you, but I'm a man. I really don't care what you call me. However, if you ignored all the comments disparaging women to drag me for saying we should begin to hold each other accountable instead of always blaming the victims, then you are a woman hater yourself; a pathetic one.

stormborn28:
If girls avoid yahoo boys we won't be arguing

There lies the problem. You don't see the need to call out the men of nowadays that will do anything for money because of gender affiliation. That is the problem with y'all. It's more about protecting your herd (gender, religion, tribe, etc) than addressing the real issue. This is exactly why the county is where it is today. In every situation, you think of what women could've done differently to avoid being victims but you never hold the real culprits accountable. And you think that's intelligence? That's foolishness to say the least cause the problem will never go away.

You think this girl knew her boyfriend was a ritualist and stayed? You think ritualists go about with placards indicating they're killers? You think innocent girls can't fall victims? Keep burying your heads in the sand to avoid addressing the elephant in the room. Your sisters, cousins, aunties, etc. are no longer safe with thier fellow human beings. The men that are supposed to protect them are killing them. And you think the most manly thing to do to join a bunch of teenagers online to call out women. Shame.

excanny:
Keep wallowing in your foolishness. Agbado brain.


Abokifx no longer display black market price as CBN section.

5000 naira to dollar will hit you like a electric shock. Na me send you make you go vote living dead as president.

Why couldn't you just check instead of coming here to rain insults on someone? It amazes me that people like you can read and write, and yet you're so crude like cave men. Seriously, will it take anything away from you guys to relate with one another in a sane and civilized manner? Nawa o

It's true, guys. It has crashed to 795.

stormborn28:
Ladies, try and understand the message instead of attacking the messenger.
Every yahoo boy is a potential ritualist.

Thank you the advice. Let the messenger also send a message to his fellow men. Tell them that every yahoo boy will end up in jail. This idea of always sending messages to ladies when a man commits a crime is ridiculous. It's always ladies, ladies, ladies. How about the real culprits? Can't men receive messages too? Talk to men, tell them to stop these things. Don't shy away from that conversation.

Lol... why not talk about himself. Why bring in Wizkid as an ammunition?

They are all over Nairaland.

When a girl kills, daughters of Eve are devlish.
When a girl cheats, women can never be faithful.
When a man kills, the woman got herself into that.
When a man cheats, his woman might have gotten fatter or pushed him with her nagging.

For many of you guys, the manly thing to do in every situation is to blame women and argue in favor of your gender. A fellow man killed a human being, but you all prefer to call out women instead. You focus on the victim and list everything they could've done better. You tell us how women of nowadays are this and that, all while shying away from holding your fellow men accountable. Aren't y'all ashamed of this cowardice? You don't have the courage to speak the truth cause you are so eager to belong. You're afraid of how other men would see you if you call them out for what men of nowadays have become. So when you read news like this, what comes to your mind is how to blame women. Don't you see how embarrassing this is for you? You say women are killed for going after rich men. This one went with a struggling young man and got killed, and your reaction is to still blame women. When will you start telling one another the truth? Why would you treat men like some brainless objects that can never be blamed for anything? Cowards!

I will call it a temporary downtime instead of a mental health problem. Uprooting yourself from your society or social circle to a land across the ocean is already depressing. You experience a wide range of emotions at the same time; excitement, disappointment, anxiety, loneliness etc. In addition, the culture out here is based on the idea of "mind your business" and this makes it a bit hard to make new friends. Everyone is from somewhere and we're all being careful not to overstep our boundaries seeing that we all have different cultural backgrounds. And you have the legendary winter blue. A seasonal depression that comes as a result of always staying indoors during the cold days of winter. Luckily, we have the facilities to support people like this.

But guess what, it gets better. Yes, the first couple of years are hard but it gets better. You get your entry job, you make that one friend who was also looking for friends and you introduce the new people you meet to each other, you get a better job or a better position at work, you get your own place, you explore the city with your new friends, you make mistakes, you learn, you build memories and you get attached to the city. Before you know it, you can't imagine living elsewhere.

So I say, hang in there and give it your best shot. Talk with people back home and try as much as possible to step out of your comfort zone. Talk to people and be open minded. But if at the end you can't take it, please go back to the world you know. Your health comes first.

Luckysbab:
A matter of life and death. So what? Who put him in the situation? You want Nairalanders to take responsibility for his foolishness?

Nobody asked you to take responsibility. Do you guys just type anything for the sake of argument? Where did you read that you should take responsibility? I that just advised him, did I take responsibility? He said his friend contracted an STD and asked for some advice regarding the next steps. It's either you give him that or you don't. How does blaming him or calling him out for his sexuality or dirty fingers add any value at this point? You called him foolish, but what could be more than opening one's mouth to say things that don't add any value to the matter at hand?

It is preventable, but it has happened already People have sex, condoms break, etc. All these are happening around us. He's not the first and won't be the last. Even the best of us could get the disease. It only takes one thrust. It could be a cheating partner, a broken condom, sex after alcohol or just being carried away for a very brief moment. You are not better than anyone. Look within, there are many things that have happened in your life that could've been prevented if you had done one or the other, but they happened any way and you didn't keep beating yourself up about them. You instead found a way to move on. And that's what the OP is here for, a way forward.

I think about it sometimes. Anytime you meet a Nigerian out here, the conversation is always about how the leaders are bad. It's always the leaders. And while I completely agree with that, I feel blaming the leaders has provided us with a channel to push the blame away from ourselves. Asides from the fact that the leaders are not the ones that force us to commit crimes abroad, the truth is that people troop out en mass to vote for these so-called terrible leaders in every election. For some, it's due to religious affiliation or tribal affiliation, and for others, it's for the little change they're paid after voting. Some don't even vote at all. And then we dare to complain about bad leaders. Sad.

Nairaland people will never cease to amaze me. You read a story like this, and all you're interested in is the guy's sexuality, the cleanliness of his fingers, etc. When have people become this shallow? This is a matter of life and death, people!

OP, please tell your friend the truth in the calmest way possible. Tell him the result of an oral HIV test can only be confirmed with a blood work and offer to accompany him to the hospital. Let him know HIV is not as dangerous as it used to be about 10/15 years ago. People living with HIV hardly develop aids these days. In fact, the HIV drugs have now been compacted into a single tablet to be taken just once a day and that's all. At a point, his viral load will be undetectable. This means he'll no longer be able to transmit it to others. He can still birth a child and live as long as hiv negative people. All these are possible if and only if he gets his status on time and starts his treatment immediately. Hopefully, he has an insurance to help with the cost of the drugs.

These days, the mental breakdown that comes with being diagnosed with HIV kills faster than the virus itself. Unfortunately, Nigeria doesn't have enough facilities to support them mentally, and people are too mean over there. So it falls on his friends and family to reassure him that this isn't the end of the word.

press9jatv:
Wow this is beautiful oooo. I love this ooooo. What a lovely friendship here

They are not friends. They are acquaintances.

French!

tollyboy5:
Ladies can be very funny. Most especially those ones from poor home.

They're all damaged inside and see life as the survival of the fittest. This is the situation in ghettos mostly.

So i told one of my guy that we, that came from average family from same ghetto had to quickly wise up and start playing smart before these daughters of eve use person head .

When these ladies see money or sey your house tvsh they fall in love so quickly , in fact they'll love you more than your mother and sisters.

Since we know the format already play along and enjoy the moment while it last, all of us don dey damaged . After break up those that got pained and wont want to move on start with "Men are Scum" why jumping on another client (man).

But the character of these ladies don't warrant you killing your fellow human being.

A fellow man committed murder, you wrote a long comment on how bad ladies could be. A "son of Adam" killed a whole human being for money ritual and your response is to call out "these daughters of eve"? Do you see how wicked some of you are? You think that one sentence you made at the end automatically levels the ground? Who do you think you're deceiving with that? Seriously, aren't you guys ashamed of this shallow mindedness you exhibit on this forum? Why don't we have deep and independent thinkers on here anymore? All y'all do is say anything that makes you feel "among".

Pray tell, what can these "daughters of eve" possibly do or say that can equate murder? Yet you don't call out your fellow men but would rather focus on calling out women even when they're clearly the victim? You people say ladies get used for rituals cause they follow rich men. Now, this one went for a struggling young man and still got killed by him. For a couple of days it's been similar stories all over the internet. And your response is to call out "these daughters of even"?

You probably think comments like this make you appear more manly, but the truth is, it makes you look weak in the sight of real men. You don't have the courage to hold your fellow men accountable because you're so eager to belong. You'd rather keep calling out women all the time cause that's easy to do. Such toxic masculinity is a symptom of weakness.

Abuja is a very organized city. The roads, the walkways, the buildings, etc., everything is on point.

Reminderz:
loneliness, depression, idleness, and madness is real...

So when men drool over a pretty girl as they do everyday on here, it's fine. But when a girl does same over a handsome man, it's loneliness, depression idleness and madness all at once? Lol... OK.

Obakoolex:
God bless your brain.
Can you teach me french?

Thanks, boss.

I actually stopped teaching French due to time difference.

Footballers make money from football. Even though some of them sign marketing contracts with big organizations, thier major source of income is football, and they make a lot of from it. On the other hand, many other celebrities make more more from marketing deals than whatever form of art they're into. They are like sign boards and thier value depends on how much attention they attract (of what use is a signboard hidden in the bush?). Apart from this, many of them also need to push thier arts themselves.

As we know, whatever one's source of income is, one must take it seriously. This is why I don't call out celebrities for always seeking attention. They're just hustling like everyone else. While a footballer might be more focused on horning thier skills in order to raise thier value, other celebrities are more focused on gaining more followers or doing things that keeps them in the spotlight in order raise thiers. Money is the endgame in both cases.

Let's consider how this might affect the lifestyles or decisions of the individuals. As a footballer, you can marry anyone you like and this will not affect your worth. You can even go to your village and find a man/woman you like or get along with to marry. They keywords are "like" and "compatibility". This doesn't affect your football skills in any way.

Meanwhile, other celebrities are focused on increasing thier social value. To them, it's important to get married to people that will make tongues wag when they step out or people that can sustain the lifestyle they need to be on the spotlight. This pushes many of them to marry for beauty, social status or wealth. They marry extremely stunning women, rich men and other celebrities. Even though it's not necessarily bad to marry these people, the issue arises when love and compatibility take a second place in thier priority list.

The truth is, no matter one's character, statue, beauty, etc, they will, at some point, do things that annoy us. And when that happens, the love or likeness we have for them is what keeps us going, not thier wealth, status or beauty. I believe this is why other celebrities tend to divorce more than footballers. It's just an opinion.

BigDawsNet:
Baba no talk ham again oh... wack ke..

Let me show u dis small one wey dey with me...

Just open the page one by one... you go think say u dey watch movie in 5D 😎😎😎

The new Nigerian passport is actually better looking.

@OP, it's good to see people appreciate something from Nigeria. On a forum like this one, that is a rare occurrence. I have multiple passports myself, and the Nigerian passport is the most beautiful (even though it's also the weakest).

A calls B "baby girl"
C gets offended

Nigerian logic is beyond me.

When we fight in Africa, it's a civil or regional war. When they over there, it's a global war. Nawa o

OP, if the exchange rate difference is your own measure of economy or living cost/standard, then you need to take classes on basic economics.

You guys have the audacity to publicize your pedophilia on here simply because you've come to realize that this is a forum where men are hardly ever criticized for any promiscuity.... disgusting.

So what makes them slay queens?

He probably appreciated the way you came forward and, therefore, decided to forgive you. It's now up to you to forgive yourself.

When the verb "cost" is used to specify the price or worth of something, the past tense/participle is "cost". Example, "this mistake cost me a lot." When it's used to say how much you estimate something to cost you, the past tense/participle is "costed". Example, "the new building was costed at 34 million naira."

kkins25:
Talk like as if that is the only reason. You know deep down what it is.

Lol... I guess you mean crime. I'm not shying away from that reality. What you failed to realize is that my comment already addresses that. There are many risks associated with letting people into your country. Some will commit crime, some will refuse to go, etc. My point is that the general risk is much lower when dealing with a small country with a very small population and even smaller population that can afford to travel. Even if a whole 5% of the entire population of Ghana decides to japa to the UK, they can still bear the consequences, both crime rate and infrastructure wise. On the other hand, even 2% of the Nigerian population alone will overwhelm any country.

So, you're probably right about what you're thinking, but all those possible unwanted outcomes are multiplied by population. So it remains a huge factor.

Probably not. A country isn't made visa free in silence. And you don't accidentally see it when booking a flight. It's usually announced so the public will be aware ahead of time. And there is no such announcement anywhere. It's not on the UK visas immigration service website, it is not VFS Global website, it's not on Ghana immigration service website and no Ghanaian I know has mentioned it in person or online. So before you jump into cursing your own country at every opportunity, take some time to investigate the news.

Even if it's true, it's not a surprise that Ghana would get that privilege first. It's a small country with a population of about 35m ans only a small percentage of that population can afford to travel to Europe. So the risk of allowing them a 30 day stay without visa in a foreign country is little compared to Nigeria that could easily overwhelm the host country due to our population.

sunnysunny:
Check our bed bug dey finish people for yankee
https://play.metalsunny.com/v/mXTWHEv

Your title says Britain/Europe, and the body says yankee. Do you even know what yankee means?

Poor thing. It's probably dehydrated.

garriAndsugar:
What's the need of keeping it as pet. Why not eat it or give it to me to eat?🙂

I don't even know what I find funnier, the soft tone of your wicked request or the warm smile at the end.

You people and this word "agenda". A man will do what appeals to him, and y'all will start screaming agenda. This is not a fashion trend. If it were, you would have a lot of married men putting on thier wives' clothes. This singular individual doesn't make it a trend. And it definitely doesn't make it an agenda. This is a man goofing around with his family. He probably wanted a unique picture that will get him some attention or make him trend, and he ended up with this idea. It's his life, and his wife isn't complaining. So why exactly are you worked up? If you don't like something, do not do it. Why do you get pressed when others do what they like? And you have the guts to ask why they uploaded it. As per your father's internet, abi? Nawa o

Mansion? I don't think 900k will get you more than a semi detached duplex in Atlanta. Even some 3 bedroom townhouses cost more than that.