₦airaland Forum

DenreleDave:
Frozen... I use to think you are a young lady oooo

Haaaaaa, your children are in the university...

Haaaaa frozen....... Abeg if u Don offend u b4, no vex ooo.... My sincere apologies ooo

My dear, i understand 🤣🤣

If you read my lines here on nairaland
I say things the way it is expected to be

Though I hardly get insulted

But my aim is to let people know that

If you can deceive people
You can't deceive yourself

The moment you tell yourself the truth and do the right thing you will be stable in life

Nothing will bring you down

DenreleDave:
Many endure bcox of their kids... They don't have the power to cater for them, so they stay with their abusive partner and endure as long as their kids are "fine"

I understand this very well

Skyview01:
Thank you for saving your mom's life. She must have been proud having a strong daughter like you.

Honestly she was, with my dad
My dad keep telling me that he wished I was a man
😂 😂 😂

rightopdeep:
Oh ! My God ,You did all these for your Mother ..You Inspire me ,This is Very Touchy

Sometimes I look at this World ,It's all Vanities, I still know some of my Old Friends that doesn't even have a Land no matter how small not to talk having a Building .

Some still stays in a Rented Apartment till date .I remember one that was Sent Parking out of his Rented Apartment asked me to help him Move his Things ,I helped ,He finally moved back to the Village .

This Same Mother Did a lots for me when I was living in a face to face House ,My School Etc ..Your Story Encouraged me ,I was Just confused on what to do but right now ,My heart Becomes strong To sell it.

I have made up mind ,I can't Live in two Houses .

Whatever Would be must be .

At least I must Satisfy My Conscience.

SHE HAS BEEN ON SOME FIRST AID, ANTI PAINS,ANTI INFLAMMATORY DRUGS .DONE SOME MEDICAL TEST .

SO I'M PRAYING ,HOPING FOR A BUYER .

THOUGH SOME HAVE SHOWN INTEREST BUT YET TO PAY .

I EVEN PUT UP THE ADVERTS ON HERE .

The Link
https://www.nairaland.com/7806453/house-sale-owner-4-mlocation


TOLD SOME REAL ESTATE AGENTS OFFLINE AS WELL



THANK YOU SO MUCH

God will make it simple for you

Once you have made up your mind you will do it

Good luck to you

DenreleDave:
Haaaa.. You do well oooo.

30 years extra

Yes honestly and she lived with me and carried my children for me and my children never knew what it means to be on day care all through

I didn't even have a house help as she does everything for me

Especially looking after those children in their infant age and preschool age

Till they entered boarding house ans now in the university

If I don't spend that money then to save her life
I will still spend it on her burial if she had died then

But it all ended with praise to God 🙏

rightopdeep:
.

@sekundosekundo,Let me put it straight to you sir. I won't ever Live to Regrets it , Even if She is Older than 65 , Experience Narrated up there By this Member Frozen70 Indeed Puts More Energy and Optimism in me .

I have Vacant Land as well which I'm hopeful to still build another second one Later if Almighty God Wish .

I came up on here for Advise ,I have Gotten Different ones and I Appreciate Everyone Including the Member that Insulted me ,I thank you as well.

Thank You all.

We Learn Everyday ...It's My Most Trying Times Anyway .

Everyone Going through Trying times May The Creator See All through.

Amen 🙏

rightopdeep:
. Thank you so much for this .

Let me use myself as a case study here

In the year 1996, my mum was terribly sick and we took her to hospital after some days she was not responding again, just mopping at us in the hospital and couldn't talk

I closed from work and I came there met my dad watching my my mum helplessly

I asked him what happen he said her condition is not responding and is getting worst

I said Dad, let's take her to Eko hospital he said that hospital is expensive I said let's get there first

When we got to Eko hospital for she was admitted there, those days anything Eko hospital can not treat then forget it

So we were asked to deposit 30k, so my dad became worried about the amount I said Dad what is it again and it was around 10pm

He said they requested for 30k I said let me sign an undertaking

He said where will the money come from, I said I have 31k in my account that by tomorrow I will go and close the account

So I went to the consultant that hour and told him to commence work on my mom that tomorrow morning I will bring the money

The whole Doctors on duty that night was shocked at me, a small girl like me I was just 22yrs then, so they ask me where can I get that amount in the morning, I said I have 31k in my account that I will close the account in the morning

So they came down to my mum, took her blood and urine, the urine was passed through a catithar and the color was black

So through out that night I said to myself
Is better I close this account and save my mother, so that if any thing happens I will know that I did my best with all I have

So as early as 6am I left Eko hospital to bank and closed my account then with Universal Trust Bank

Brought the whole money from that account and paid to the hospital

Meanwhile my mum was in semi comma and was just looking no sleep, no food, just looking at the ceiling

She couldnt stool for 1wk and when they started working on her she started responding gradually and she made a sign that she wants to poo

We got to her room toilet she couldn't poo

I collected hand gloves, insert my finger into her anus and was breaking out the hard poo till the stone poo came out gradually and we got to the soft one which was the last poo

Immediately after that she started asking for food and started responding well

You see I did all these sacrifices to save her life to live for us all
After that she stayed 30yrs and died last two years

I didn't regret the sacrifice I made and I never lacked a penny in my life till date

Whatever good we do comes with a greater reward especially on our parents

I also thank God for Eko hospital, though we were given a bill of 300k after her stay for one month and was discharged, we were given opportunity to pay a certain amount every month till we cleared the whole bill

DenreleDave:
You think it is so easy?

So which one is easy

For a married woman to walk out of abusive marriage alive with her children

Or for a married woman's corpse to be carried out of that house and her children becoming motherless with a loveless father

BelittlePaul:
FELLOW NAIRALANDERS,Abeg i need una help oooo, my girlfiriend went for a scan this week and it was revealed that she is pregnant
Na boredom sef cause make we do the thing oo and i don't even have a job now, please i need una help make God provide job before she born as ABORTION IS NOT EVEN IN MY AGENDA AT ALLLLL,
Abeg nothing is too small to support from my good heart
PalmPay
9113038350
Adiela Messiah
Thank you

Your girlfriend just took in and you are already sending account details

So when she starts antenatals and eventually deliver what will you do then

That means you will be going about with POS machine

You better dust your shoes and hit the road to find something doing

Worst case see d her to your mum to look after her if you can't cope

We all must sense bye force

Obainoman6:
God knows from a very young age i am a no nonsense man.
Bible says spoil the rod and spoil the child or woman.
Women are like kids when you discipline them they will calm down, but before they will want to drag power with you.
in every gathering there is a leader and where 2 different sexes are gathered the one with two testicles leads - it's automatic!

IF AS A MAN U LET YOUR WOMAN RIDE U OR TALK BACK AT U WHEN YOU TALK DEN YOU HAVE FAILED GOD BECAUSE HE HAS MADE U A LEADER!

Right from when i was in primary school i don't hesitate to discipline any girl that misbehaves and put them in their place, secondary school same, university too, last 2 months a girl i was toasting was using me to play ball - but her body tell am, I show am say khaki no be leda .
You see when you discipline a woman they will respect you because you have levels and honor - unlike simps.


So as a guy i want you to look any women straight in the eyes and don't blink until they look away - if they misbehave don't hesitate to teach them a lesson and PUT THEM IN THEIR PLACE.

Dey play

You are having complex issues with your self as a man

Is like you don't have anything serious in life than to be planning on how to deal with a woman

As you are talking like parrot, if a woman decides to deal with you

You will never recover from it

Change your perception and mind set

Even the olden days men who were warriors and tougher never reasoned the way you are reasoning

I and my Fiance have known each other for three years now...so we decided to talk about us i asked him deep questions about himself that was when he told me that he once got a lady pregnant and she refused to abort the child so decide to have the baby. He said the child is with his mom in his village but promise it wont affect us or our marriage if we finally settle down and that i will be the one to decide if the child should stay with us or not. I asked him why he hid the secret from me since and he said he was scared of losing me and felt this is the right time to tell me... i felt bad and also had the feeling he is keeping other secret from me he assured me that he has no other secret.

I have never in my life imagine getting married to someone who already have a child, a Divorcee or a Second wife though i know this case is different but i have always wanted to start afresh with my man. I know we all make mistakes at one point in our lives......

Nairalanders please advise me thanks.

I decided to post this topic on this section because i am very sure of getting matured response.

Honestly you have nothing to worry about

He wasn't married to his mother so there is nothing like second wife

If you kedeep down that you love this guy, go ahead with the relationship, all you need is an assurance that he will place your children where he places that child in his life

But take note that, anything he is acquiring both of your names will have to be there because of tomorrow

So that don't labour in vain or struggle any property with anyone

As for that child be prepared to carry that child along because of posterity

rightopdeep:
Thanks ...

I just Got Sooo Confused and I need Some Talks of Encouragement,Sometimes In situation like this Sharing Helps.

Your problem is already half way solved because you have property to sell

Sell it to save your mums life and God will bless you more

What if you did that and she survived it and became better, won't you be happier to see her alive and healthy

What if your efforts saved her life, she will be so proud you made such efforts to save her

Wealth is from God

But, if she doesn't make it, at least your conscience will not judge you for neglecting her in pains

So go ahead and do what you plan

Only God will reward you

BrighterThanDay:
Why is it that even when it is so clear from all indications that your daughter is married to an irresponsible man who is toxic. Nigerian parents will still say endure and stay there.

A lot of married young ladies are down with depression and even high BP because of marital stress. But they have to remain there. It's just so sad

I blame them for staying in that abusive and toxic marriages not their parents

She is the one feeling the pains not her parents

So if she has determined to get out of it, she knows where the door is

Jbleenk:
Thanks mate. We’ll appreciated.

Welcome dear

sunnysunny:
Pls I need advice, there is lady is Love so much
. We are dating. I support her financially and spiritually through fasting her praying for her. She always claim she loved me. But I notice she will not allow me taste from any food she cooks herself. she will also reject me when I demand sex. But she is so quick and never reject my money when I give her money. I am thinking of breaking up with her. Pls I need urgent advice

So why are you supporting her spiritually through fasting and prayers

Who send you

oluwasegun462:
I just broke up with my girlfriend and I'm sad 😢.
But then I ask again, why do most young ladies of these age find it so hard to be faithful? I got to know she is cheating through a Whatsapp spy app.

What you are going through is normal

So you can forgive her and continue with the relationship and still deal with the fact that she will still cheat again

If you don't cheats on her, it can be very hurtful

But if you cheats too, then it's a game for you guys

You dont expect girls of that age to remain faithful because they believe it's greener on the other side

And they have little or no experience about life and relationships

So move above that age range or keep trying your luck if that age range is your choice

Why do you think men go for older ladies or ladies of there age range

The older a lady, the more matured and less drama

FreeSpirited:
1. I am a private and practical person who don't follow trend or do things for what people will say....I realize most wedding today are done from pressure to impress, leading many into debt and stress post-wedding day

2. I am an orphan: I don't understand why I should throw a big church wedding party feeding crowd when My Mom or Dad wouldn't be gracing that occasion, only to borrow peoples mother and father to represent them and take the shine?....besides, their absence on such massive occasion of a big wedding might trigger emotions and tears....So why should I put myself under such emotional duress in the name of wedding?

3. How many ladies today are truly worth the wedding party we throw for them: I mean in those days, you have to be a virgin to necessitate or deserve big wedding celebrations even in scriptures, not to talk of our tradition. I don't believe ladies with uncountable body count and multiple Tinder profiles should pressure anyone into big wedding party. What exactly are we celebrating? Many have done more than 5 abortions and still hooked with their toxic 'ex'. May God help men of this generation to focus on priority.
The worst of all is the epidemics of bastard firstborn children forced on a man who emptied his account throwing wedding party for same woman? This can never be me, as I'm pro-DNA test

I often think about these rationale and cant convince myself to throw big party for any woman. Traditional marriage a.k.a Introduction and sealing it up in court is okay for me. Me and few of my friends can hang out to gist, drink and eat in the evening or following day. NB: This isn't about money, just my philosophical bent about wedding ceremony.

Am I the only one who think this way?
And are there women who will understand and accept my point of view even though there's money for big party?

I think you have to inform your would be wife that wedding or crowded wedding is not for you

Both of you must be in the same page for this to work out

If you are a catholic, they organize a private and simple wedding any day of your choice at the Alter to be attended by just 4/10 people

But make sure you go to Registery with just a family member and a member from your wife family

Always remember my first paragraph as an important topics to discuss before proposal to avoid drama

Notorioustroll:
The girl I promised and wish to spend the rest of my life with has broken my heart. She started complaining few months ago that I wasn't performing like a man; that I am not satisfying her sexually. This lady advised me to get some medication for myself. She even went on research on how to build back a man to perform sexually. She always cooked and made sure I was well fed. But all she did was fruitless. I didn't take frantic step to curb that. I was reckless because my girlfriend was doing everything possible to ensure I perform.
Last week my girlfriend surprised me by saying we should break up, I asked her why and she said she's not enjoying the relationship because I'm not sexually satisfying her and the worst is that I don't make effort to change the situation. She stressed that she doesn't want to cheat on me and that's why she just have to leave and get satisfaction elsewhere. I pleaded but she said staying back in the relationship will only hurt us both because she's tired and really need good sex. I was thinking she was joking but up till today she's not showed up in my house, I called and she told me that I should move on.
Please what am I supposed to take? What medication do I need? Do I need to see the Doctor? Please help me as I'm desperately in need of valuable information. I don't want to loose this lady as she's done much for me.

Mynd44 dominique

Now that you have already lost her to another man

You want to work on your play station 🙄🙄🙄

When she was complaining, you were not taking her serious

Dey play

Virgohills:
Why do men pay for sex. The sensation is equal why will a man pay for it


It's ridiculous just thinking about it

If he is paying a sex worker, then he is paying for service rendered, she is on a business

If he is giving money to his girl friend after a good time

He is appreciating her for honoring his invitation and that's an appreciation not payment

honorik:
my dear friends, please your kind assistance is required i have i lady which i assisted during her school days, although i propose but she decline given me an excuse hat nobody is learned in her family she want to go to school first before married after much argument i concord. i was the one responsible for virtually everything both hand out, feeding, phones, assignment, project,clothing e.t.c
In summary anytime i make an attempt to see her people for a proper marriage right she will start avoiding me and i use to spend on any of her family member which i know and i do send money to her mom interval of 3months highest 5months. there is no member of family which i know that did not benefit from me. i told this lady to exercise patience with me to enable me prepare for the marriage i will only be responsible for her feeding and i will be given her money but occasionally, after two months of doing this she came to me and challenge me that when last did i buy clothes for her and give her money to make her hair, that her problems is not only food and i responded to her to be patience at least i will spend a lot and moreover talking about the ecol ac and the occasions i will single handedly do everything she wasted my time for 7years and what pains me most i avoided good woman that really want me then and the painful aspect of it all i have inform her pastor about the wedding which i give us his blessings and after that she change totally by avoiding me and frustrating my life she even refuse to pick my calls and tell me to my face that she is not interested anymore. I am seriously confuse whether to go and tell the pastor what she said that she is no longer interested and her sister even talk to her she is said until i refund 20k to her which she treated herself during that period which i didn't give her anything before i even promise to give her 10k instantly and send the balance by next week she said if the money is not complete i should forget it and forget her. she refuse to come close to me anymore stop picking my calls i even try to make peace with her but to know avail. so probably she discover that i love her so much that's why she keep doing this. so please i just need a woman that will understand me and make me happy that's just what i need. please ur suggestion is needed so that i will take my final decision

To beat you dey hungry me

Na your type woman dey control

You go get sense bye force

Go and deal with it
Mtcheew

Namdeenero:
You were too forward, even if you can’t do it you should have put it in a more subtle manner

I love the way he heat it straight on the head

You must let people know what you are capable of so that they too can know your ability

The more you manage people or tolerate nonsense all in the way not to hurt people

You hurt yourself the more, yet they will still not be satisfied with you

6ixVille:
I was casually having a convo with my babe, and she brought up this issue of some dude renting a shop for his girl, another dude buying iphone for his girl in their dating/courting stage. I'm not against all these. But I outrightly told her im not forking out 600k for any reason to someone I'm "dating" (even if I have the money), that i can only give what i can feel comfortable parting with, whether I see a future with them or not because of my experience with women and what I've heard in respect of this issue. She said its poor mans mentality. Am i being nostalgic, reckful, overreacting, or just poor?

You did well with your response to her questions and statements

She wanted to know if you are a mugu or a wise man

Now that she has seen that you are a wise man, she will adjust her thinking anytime she wants to discuss with you

If she can cope fine and if she can't cope, she knows what to do

ColdHunter:
You flag a bike and tell bike man your destination. He tells you to board and he zooms off. Theres no mention of price during the journey.

Note that even though price wasnt discussed, the destination is a popular one and has a well known price even though not written.

You get to your destination and pay bikeman the "popular" rate but he disagrees and names a higher price.

Whose fault is it in this situation? Bikeman that failed to name his price before taking off or passenger that failed to ask for price before embarking.

Nlfpmod mynd44

They do that with the intentions of getting more money from you base on their assessments on you and your personality

One day I took a bike to my house, it's a personal building, we all knows the cost of getting there from where he picked me

The moment he got to my gate, he refuse to accept the money I gave him and insist that I have to add more

So I told him you are acting this way because you saw the building where am dropping

He kept quiet, I told him for being naughty that I will not add a penny and he should be ready to remain outside the gate with me, as for me am already in my area and I am not in a hurry

I also told him that if he had said, ahhh pls add money to it, that I like your house

That would have given me joy
But for him to think he is smart spoiled everything

At last he took the exact fare and left after wasting his time

Jbleenk:
I am looking at divorcing my wife on the ground of mainly cheating among a lot of other reasons. We are only married for about 9 months.

I saw a compromising chat on her phone where someone was asking her to come spend the night with him. My problem is not the guy asking her to come spend the night with him, my problem is her reply to him.

She was supposed to be in school that day but I went to pick her from school the previous day cause she has an appointment with the doctor.

She told the guy when he asked her to come spend the night that she won’t be able to come because she’s writing exams. Meanwhile she’s actually not writing any exam at that period, and was in my house at that point.

I confronted her but she came up with stories that didn’t add up. I suspected that:

1 she must have been having sexual affairs with this person

2 she probably would have gone if she was in school.

Right now I have separated with her against pleading from her families and thinking of initiating a divorce process.

My question is how do I go about this and not pay alimony as she don’t deserve anything from me.

The story with her is a lot deeper I hope to find time and the presence of mind to write someday. In the meantime, I need to go ahead with the divorce and move on.

In this case, you have no business with Alimony

You guys are married but yet to have children
Besides the marriage is still too young to talk about any nonsense Alimony

The first step is to ask for a refund of the bride price and once that is achieved, then you are fine

But if her family refuse to refund the bride price you have to still go ahead withe divorce

But I just have to let you know that, you rushed into this and now you are rushing out

Next time don't be in a hurry take your time

Understanding women is not something you will just assume that a woman will remain faithful

Take time and know what you want from a woman, if you can then you will get it

Hezzyluv:
Good day NLs, I will like to be brief couple with the fact that I'm not a good writer. Now for those of us here who most times believe any story on NL is fiction or tales, it's not cock-n-bull. But if you insist, den suit yourself or take it with a pinch of salt.

I have this teenage girl Sarah 17 (not her real name) who is so fond of me same as the mother and her siblings. Infact, I got to know these girls 2ru dia mum because she (the mum) do patronize me (I have business center close to their house). Each time her mum is looking for her and didn't see her around the compound, she will call my line and say "Hello Gab, is Faith with u"? When I affirmed to her question, she feels relaxed I.e, her mother believes I will NEVER make funny moves towards her little daughter (tho not advisable to parents). "And me no even fit do so, Because I see her as my daughter. Plus, my integrity and pedigree matters and I have this believe watch words ringing in my head day by day which is, Gab, let your head do the thinking and not your pen!s.

I have not been seeing their father around which made me became curious and had no option den to ask his whereabout from the woman. She told me he left her with the children I didn't even bother to ask further because, I hate to dey pok-norse. Now to ease the burden, she had no option then to leave the children with their Uncle (her elder brother), that the children came back to start staying with her about four months ago since she has gotten her apartment.

"Na where the problem start be this". For the first time this their Uncle saw me, l saw this feeling of extreme hate towards me from him. I greeted him, "good evening sir! he didn't respond. "As gentle man wey I be, I just buy wetin I go to buy and left that place." Since that day, I reduced my way of going that side even when I have business to do around there some times, I shaply get it done and leave afterwards. The following day, Faith came to my shop as usual. I asked her "da Fu!k is wrong with your uncle"? She said they have been talking about Gabriel (me) and there was a day he came around, sounded them working naver to mention my name again that I shouldn't mind him that he just want to protect dem from bad boys bla, bla, bla... and all of that. But deep down, l believe it's more then that but I just let it slide since the mum had already called me to apologise for her brother's behavior towards me.

Now the koko
She was sent to my shop to come collect money POS, and few minutes latter, the Uncle came visiting. He asked where is Faith? Afraid of him and not wanting to tell him she has went to Gabriel's shop. Because, he will flog her for coming to my place (flog 17years old girl oo..), they now lied to him that she went to aboki's shop to buy something. He went there and didn't see her that was when the Aunt Called me that I should tell Faith to come home immediately that her uncle is around. U need to see how this girl jumped and left my place with the speed of light. (I don't want to go to details of how it ended that day because, if I start narrating what that man did, to her, her siblings and his younger sister, "this place go full with writing"

Now, down to the real koko
After the drama in paragraph above, the following evening, she came to my shop.
I was like Faith, you again
But then I latter noticed this traumatized look on her face on looking at her for the third time, she rest her head on my shoulder and started crying profusely. I allowed her to cry for like one minutes (was meant to understand u allow someone to cry first before asking dem what's up) den I calmed her down and ask what the matter is?
That was how this girl started telling me how her said Uncle (The over protective uncle) had been molestation her sexually.

-How he fingered her (by for)
-How he kissed her (by force)
-How he force her to watch porn (by force)
-How he had tried to rape her
-How He vowed to be the first person that would enter her with his ghola
-How he would be the one to marry her
-How he had threatened to kill anyone who will stop him, kill her and kill himself.

Asked her if she has told her mum, she said how will she start this? That they will never believe her! The annoying thing is that her mum is scared of the brother (extremely) and this man I'm talking about should be around his 50something years old oo.. and not married.

As I'm typing this so, I'm yet to set my eyes on the girl since the day this this happed (Day before yesterday). Her WhatsApp dey off, she no dey even pick my calls.

Do I go 2ru the mother??
Do I go with police??
Do I go with human Right
Dose the woman want it trash out in family way?

Even me, I dey confused.

Pls admin,move this to front page!


Modified, to those who fink her closeness to me would lead to one fin, u go wait... tire

Honestly, you may be taking risk fraternizing with this family

First her mum is comfortable asking you if her daughter is with you and you said yes, so that means you can be with her and she is ok with that

Secondly they have a wicked uncle who sees you as a threat and yet you have not done anything to warrant that but his instinct has told him that you are a potential rival to him
Do you have the strength to struggle with this man over that family, think about it especially on that girl

Third one, the mum is already helpess and can't confront her brother if the girl should complain
My question now is, will you be able to fight for this girl to get justice, if yes are you really sure what that you can do that from start to finish

Lastly, you said that you don't have anything to do or doing with that girl, well the mind is shapper than you think, when that feelings will develop be ready to father a child

Left for me, start withdrawing from them, unless you don't mind what will be the out come and you are ready to face it

Just face your business that's what you came to that area to do

Almiron:
SOURCE

May his soul Rest in Peace

So sad, Rest in Peace

SemperFid:
Lol 😆 🤣 😂

🤣🤣🤣🤣 I know that it's funny

Versitee:
Good evening all.

Please my husband wants to covert some of the rooms in our hose to self con and rent it out.

We have just 1 tank of 3k litres. Bringing in tenants means we have to buy another tank but we don't have enough money for the renovations and the extra tank.

We either renovate, and rent out without connecting water. Tenants will have to fetch using the backyard tap. In that case rent will be 120.

Or we get a loan and buy a tank and connect. Then rent will be 180k.


What do we do?

N/B. my husband wants to collect the rent monthly and not yearly.

I think you should do whatever you want to do now and rent it according to the rent in that area

If you leave it till you get money, materials will keep increasing

Look for money when they rent it pay back the money and hope for subsequent rent payments

Monthly is not advisable as you are not in their pocket to determine how regular their payment will be

theInfinity:
Sincerely, many women especially the married ones go through a lot emotionally. I can communicate this because this is faceless forum and I'm bounded by the virtue of my career to respect my client's privacy.

Yes, they will be sorted out with time

SimeonOTC:
This powerful and encouraging advice isn't met for one person. I will tap from it too♥️♥️♥️

Waooo, God bless you now and always

Thank you