₦airaland Forum

All na wash.

Sexually decent people practice it, they hardly broadcast it.

Ladies love this kind of threads though.

Why? Because they always do when you tell them what they want to hear.

The girl is damaged, traumatised and not mentally ok. Her high intelligence could eventually help her cope.

Get her expert psychological medical (as psychiatry is called these days) care. General psychiatric exam is not good enough, as you know.

If possible check her into a boarding school. That way, you can educate her and she can have a good shot at a better life.

Well done for not kicking her out. She clearly needs your help even more now.

You will have to find a good opportunity to tell your hubby. You took her in with his support. Keeping such a secret from him is not good. He will be appalled for sure, but he will understand that the girl has problems.

But when did children become acceptable as a collateral?

The shopkeeper did not fear being accused of child abduction??

martineverest:
victor Moses Is a Benin man

Nor mind them.

If he was accused of witchcraft, they would have said he's from Edo; even if Togolese.

Silkmoth33:
Which kind joke be Dis one?

Lol. Look at the surrounding of the house. Which part of Benin has such rugged hills?

Benin is largely flat.

If they said Akoko Edo side that has hills, I might say maybe.

When a woman cheats, her man's life is in danger.

Men can casually cheat, no emotion involved. Just a mechanical process.

But MOST women get emotionally attached. The guy they cheat with can brainwash her to kill you. Or her lover can even organise killing you.
Both can then take your properties or just to remove you as an obstacle.

Also women cheating in marriage could mean your kids are not biologically yours. Like 30% of all kids by the way.

pyyxxaro:
Auchi people in Edo state answer that name a lot

Common name in Edo Central & Edo North.

[quote author=dare2differ post=44405197]I am not saying I am an authority

I believe that the possibility that she will return is higher

[b]Why are we over-flogging a non-issue?[/[/b]quote]

Because it's important to OP.

At 22, no need to hurry into marriage. Marriage is about compromise and agreement. If both cannot agree, then better she moves on and finish her studies.

OP is 28 and he wants a family life straight away, is that too much to ask for a married man?

She obviously feels time is on her side. Family life can wait. OP probably thinks otherwise.

dare2differ:
If they got married, she would come back

I meet married and newly weds almost every time, so what are you talking about?


I don't think she is indecisive. I think she doesn't want to lose him. She is trying to balance both!
besides this should serve a lesson to guys that go for young girls

For every one you see that has returned, I have also seen many who did not return. And that over a period of 25 years.

Those I have seen that returned, the vast majority were in their mid-20s or above. Usually with kids back in 9ja.

So don't sound as if you are an authority in this area.

Taryur3:
All this men...after bleeping 25..26...27...28...years old lady times without number.they wI'll now decide to go for fresh young ones...for marriage.God is watching all if you.22 is not ready for marriage bro...go and look for 25 or 26 even 27. Or your age mate.they are ready for u nownow.

What is fresh in 21 years old these days?

Some begin doing it at 14. Is 6 or 7 years on the "odometer" fresh?

It's not about fresh or not, it's about chemistry/compatibility.

dare2differ:
He doesn't want her to leave after marriage

I don't understand him.

Are you married? Have you lived away from your wife for a year or two before?

Do you know how many people go abroad to study and then decide to get work experience first AND eventually decide not to come back at all?

After some years in the West, this kind of indecisive girl will change her mind again.

She would probably start dictating to the guy: come abroad or forget the marriage.

if they would already have a child before she goes, it would be a different thing.

Move on dude. Let her sort her education out first.

TheSociopath:
One of the main reasons why i regret studying Mathematics in the university. Nigerians undervalue us. Meanwhile, a mathematician can study Engineering at masters level

And computer science, management, etc. Well respected degree in the West.

xclusiveguy4:
other countries most especially USA will not render help to you without having "something" in return.

I just hope this guy deliver

Let them keep dreaming. Neither will the Arabs or anyone for that matter.

Even China that appears to be doing so is only wetting ground for World domination and exportation of its large work force to unsuspecting countries.

Nigeria has no official airlines, yet it has opened its airports to Qatar airways. Even Arik that is private , only God knows how that one is doing.

I would prefer opening our airports to Kenyan or Ethiopian or Ghana airways, since we nor get shame.

Misterdhee1:
That would be one of the best Security moves ever in the Country

If Nigeria was better organised, considering insecurity issues, anyone residing in another state or city/town for over 3 months should register his/her domicile with the council in charge of the area. Anyone with criminal record should register if staying for over two weeks.

A state or city should be aware that they have an ex-convict in town.

We should know exactly who is who and where people are.

CARLOSZ:
[size=18pt]When did a Rolls Royce Ghost become a Phantom?

Amaghihe everywhere[/size]

This is Ghost. Ghost is like hundred years old in existence. Phantom barely 15 years old.

Although, a ghost and a phantom mean same thing.

In French, ghost/spirit is actually called "fantôme". But spirit in a positive sense is preferably called "esprit". E.g. Holy Ghost = Saint Esprit or Saint-Esprit.Many words came through French (during about 300 years the French Normans ruled England from 1066AD) from Latin into English.

Again, for SSCE/Jambites reading on NL.

EasternActivist:
Misappropriated complaints...
Instead of blaming the minister of petroleum for their woes in tackling the fuel scarcity, you are here putting blames on oil marketers...

Is it the fault of oil marketers that they are owed subsidy revenues...?

Is it the fault of the oil marketers that there is shortage of forex to import fuels...?

Is it the fault of oil marketers that every of them must go to nnpc depot to get scarce fuel with all the hurdles??

No matter any intimidation from the governors which you pray for against the oil marketers it will never solve the problem rather expect more of fuel scarcity when the oil marketers decides to go on strike in your various sw states in reprisal..

You voted for change chains, isn't it?
Rubbish

Governors have no resource to monitor these things.

Aregbe cannot even pay civil servants let alone monitor black marketers. Where will he get the money from?

This is where federalism or regionalism is needed. States have too little power in many aspects of law enforcement.

Nellybii:
Give them one more year without national cake to share and you will see them jumping ship.

Like El Rufai, Kwakwanso, Saraki and most of them jumped from PDP to APC?

No surprise na. They will go to follow share money in APC.

It's national cake. Or you think the skyrocketing Buhari, Tinubu or any of them get your time?

Zieristclair:
Ex-President Bill Clinton has visited during Obj's era.But what is it with U.S presidents visiting when their full tenure is about to end?

That way, they can avoid possible political backlash that the powerful US Congress can cause to a president. If seeking re-election or has many years left in office, he could be said to visit corrupt countries by opposition. Hobnobbing with corrupt leaders.

They leave it till a few months left in office. Politics in the West is about cleverness and public opinion.

We need to be careful because of our sisters, cousins, friends and daughters.

Some people are taking a serious matter here too casually.

Not every girl that feels comfortable in your company wants sex from you.

Some just take you as a friend, brother, buddy, etc.

If she's your girlfriend/lover, that's different. Assuming she consents to intimacy.

Otherwise, assume that no from her means no.


Using force to overpower her for sex is ra.pe.

Even if she doesn't report to the police due to fear of stigma.

We have too many traumatised and bitter women out there who had suffered ra.pe. It could be your future wife.

ogawisdom:
Most married ppl r room mates most of d times, learn to deal with dt it is nt nollywood. Jst give him space b4 he attacks u I dnt think dt shld b an issue. When he needs u he will come around u

Haba! It's not that bad na.

I agree they attend University of Married Life (UML), but roommates is exaggeration.

There were two major warning signs OP ignored in the excitement of wedding preparation.

(1) A man of 40 had to be stampeded by his parents to marry. Haba! He has income but still didn't deem it fit to marry. He probably knew taking responsibility for others isn't his cup of tea. If he lived in an individualistic society like Europe or America, he would probably remain single lifelong. I have seen many people in their 80s and older towards end of life. No kids, never married. Their stories of being contented living on their own are quite interesting. As an African, I kind of pity them. Some die virtually alone. No relative.

(2) He bones his siblings. This is a major personality thing (maybe a flaw even). A man of 40 not able to relate well with ANY of his siblings, yet OP expected him to relate with a total stranger, from a different home & background in the name of marriage. Our relationship skills begin at home.

His charms during courtship was just like using "banana to catch monkey".

eazysally:
The bill have been their since 1984 and he knows kaduna is religiously volatile while is he revisiting an issue that is already enacted when he suppose to be acting on it, he should have let sleeping dogs lie. the initial public outcry on the bill emanated from his state else u and I who reside outside the state including prophet suleman wouldn't have bother. This shows it has an under tune agender targeted at a particular religion.

"Undertone agenda" you mean?

This nor be ITK, just that secondary school kids & jambites are picking up words and terms here.

hurricaneChris:
After England lost worldcup hosting right to Russia in 2018, the then fifa president, Sepp Blatter, allegedly said "English football is run by 1diots"

Ashley Cole re echoed it when he called english FA "bunch of twats"

Am actually feeling this country is run by 1diots. From petroleum to power, finance to information ministries, they all look confused.

Something tells me Buhari installed these guys in these ministries to embarrass them.

Else can anyone tell me why it looks like this confused govt is a one man show?

Look, the man said ministers are noisemakers. What else do you want to hear?
The man is a dictator, he doesn't believe in democracy, rule of law, joint decision taking, etc.

See that Kemi Adeosun. Does she look like someone who can manage the nation's finances especially during these tough times?

Even the ordinarily effective Fashola, does he actually have the power to do things he wants?

Look at Lai Mohammed, he has to scratch his head before he can utter any word these days.

They are all shackled big time.

5starmilitant:
You are one of the reasons, people will continue to hate bubu the more. You're too frustrated.


Lemme also remind you that in that ogogoro era, power never dropped to 0mw.

You reckon Bubu need some ogogoro to jolt him? He's religion won't allow it.

I guess those in generator queues in filling stations will give an arm and a leg now to get GEJ back.

rheether:
If you a solider in the NA, send me a PM ASAP.

hmmm, fake soldiers loading.........
Can yellow fever police pm you too?

arofemites:
I had experienced what OP is comparing when living in Rotterdam.

Nevertheless, home is home. It is because of dese factors most of u in diaspora don't want to come home. You are yelling for a change in ur father's land and u r away wit nothing to contribute to make a change.

For me, I bliv d weak n hopeless ones who don't have d courage and wat it takes to survive will abandon dere country for a dirty pasture.

Had it been dat dese westerners abandoned dere beloved countries during d hardship of 15th,16th n 17th centuries, where would u have run to now?

Let's make our country great by uniting forces. Even in d absence of good leadership, I'll do my part by feeding this nation with my projects.

May God help us all, amen.

Don't yell for a change in diaspora. Come to contribute your quota.

You mean surviving through corruption, bribery, exam malpractice, ritual killing, political thuggery and what not?

Some people just want a decent living, a place where you get things on merit and through hard work, not tribe or region or state of origin or who your papa is.

Around 40 to 50 billion dollars remitted by diaspora Nigerians yearly help house, educate, give medical care, provide jobs (bricklayers, carpenters, alumaco workers, other artisans,etc) for millions, real estate boost and more. That is an amount about twice Nigeria's annual budget remitted yearly.

Crime, prostitution and more would be worse without it.

arofemites:
I had experienced what OP is comparing when living in Rotterdam.

Nevertheless, home is home. It is because of dese factors most of u in diaspora don't want to come home. You are yelling for a change in ur father's land and u r away wit nothing to contribute to make a change.

For me, I bliv d weak n hopeless ones who don't have d courage and wat it takes to survive will abandon dere country for a dirty pasture.

Had it been dat dese westerners abandoned dere beloved countries during d hardship of 15th,16th n 17th centuries, where would u have run to now?

Let's make our country great by uniting forces. Even in d absence of good leadership, I'll do my part by feeding this nation with my projects.

May God help us all, amen.

Don't yell for a change in diaspora. Come to contribute your quota.

You mean surviving through corruption, bribery, exam malpractice, ritual killing and what not?

Some people just want a decent living, not survival by any means. A place where you get things on merit and through hard work, not tribe or region or state of origin or bribery or who your papa is. Not jungle style hustle but civilised way.

Around $40 to 50 billion dollars remitted by diaspora Nigerians yearly help house, educate, give medical care, provide jobs (bricklayers, carpenters, alumaco workers, carpenters,etc) for millions, real estate boost and more. That is an amount about twice Nigeria's annual budget remitted yearly.

Crime, prostitution and more would be worse without it.

omonnakoda:
Meanings of words change with time. THE PEOPLE ARE MASTERS of words not slaves. In Living Memory, GAY did not mean HOMOSEXUAL. It meant happy

Sure. So going by today's meaning, a name like Marvin Gaye would not exist.

Monimatic:

Chai all these APC zombies have suffered from Ben Bruce punchlines
See finishing

More like they have become punching bags.

From her English, no doubt she's one of the typical zombies with questionable NEPA bill certificates like their boss.

rottennaija:
Visited which country? Did GEJ know what to takes to win a war? Of he did not, did his chief know? Stop displaying your ignorant here. GEJ never prepared to be a president and never knew what to takes to be one.

Lol GMB contested several times before winning. Yet took him 6 months to chose ministers even though most were around him for years. If that's preparation, then zombies really have lost it.

I know Buhari knows how to plan coups, winning wars no. 10 months on. Despite Boko already severely pummelled between Jan and may last year.

By the time your kerosene lamp join your I better pass my neighbour gen to form queue at filling stations your eyes go clear.

rottennaija:
Immediately PMB became president, he traveled to Chad, Benin Republic and later Cameron, wailers shouting that he should tackle boko haram, sit at home.

Now that the result are coming out daily, they suddenly forgot that it was PMB that formed the coalition that is demolishing boko haram.

Now, they are saying he his touring around. I wonder of this wailers will ever learn from history.

Hypocrisy. What did GMB say when GEJ visited those countries? When GEJ pummelled Boko early last year, did APC support our army? Is it two months that APC promised to eradicate Boko?

Jabioro:
He left Nigeria in1978 ,since then he has refused to marry,.Now that his late,the country that he judiously served rejected him,so wetin them want us to do..

Please get things right first. People do get divorced abroad. If divorced 15 years ago and kids gone with wife, they can be brainwashed and never really see dad again. Yes, some women do that.

I know of a man around 80. From a West African country living in Europe for like 55 years. After a couple of failed marriages, he decided to return to Africa in early 1990s. Then war broke out in his country. For the next 14 years or so. By the time war finished, he was ill and depending on regular medical care. He stayed abroad for treatment.

For some that begin life happily with family and friends, some end up lonely. Sometimes not due to conscious decision but fate and circumstances. Read Ecclesiastes 9:11 about race not to the swift.

Women have no sense of humour when it comes to love and cheating or baby outside matter.