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Bukatyne's Posts

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Family › Re: Marital Problem by bukatyne(f): 12:30pm On May 24, 2020
yettymuse:
this is all white lies!..what do you except from a lonely man that craves the warmth of a woman!. Men do not love you, stop thinking that they do! They tolerate you, they lust you, and they would tell any lies just to get a piece of you!

but why do women spill so much??! These men don’t need all the informations y’all put out! I’m more worried that a man you’re yet to marry already knows so much about you... this is already a big disadvantage! You’ve lost the game before playing it! So, FLEE!

A man with his own children will NEVER tow the route of IVF with you...what is he looking for? Pray tell! All na sakamanje!

I hope you’re financially independent sha, to be able to absorb any shock thereafter. I wish you all the best in your decisions....
You believe a man cannot love a woman?

Interesting.
Family › Re: My Friend Threatens To Divorce Wife Over This Issue by bukatyne(f): 10:56pm On May 23, 2020
Funny thread.

The solution to men's misbehaviors is not behaving like them: it would mean all the complaints stems from lack of opportunity and not a moral ground.

It also means that women are no different from the men they are complaining against; they do not just have the opportunity.

Instead, retain your good attitude and insist that whoever you tangle with behaves appropriately.
Family › Re: Her Lack Of Ambition Is Killing My Happiness. by bukatyne(f): 10:39pm On May 23, 2020
funmisticqueen2:
so, who does the housework?

Cos if she does all the housework, then she is being productive.
Some husbands don't want a wife sitting at home under the guise of 'doing chores'.

I know someone who got two helps so that his wife would not sit at home.

And no, he doesn't need her money.

He can't just stand a wife staying at home all day.
Family › Re: Why Do Women Lose Interest In Their Husbands After Few Years In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 10:06pm On May 23, 2020
Amopeekun:
In total support, my sister. E tire me
All will be well. smiley
Family › Re: Why Do Women Lose Interest In Their Husbands After Few Years In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 10:05pm On May 23, 2020
yvelchstores:
it's well. your posts encourages,for sure...I just wish it was very easy as it sounds. sometimes you give give give give and it's never enough. Over to you Jesus,na where I dey right about now #handsup
It is about been deliberate which starts from the mind.

I understand that sometimes, even one's best is not enough.

God will give you the wisdom required to resolve the issues the best way.

All will be well sis.

*Hugs*
Family › Re: Her Lack Of Ambition Is Killing My Happiness. by bukatyne(f): 10:02pm On May 23, 2020
@deji85:

Your wife reminds me of a theory: some people put up characteristics they think a prospective spouse would like and dump it after the goal: marriage.

Your wife said she saved money for the business; at no point did you mention that she brought out her funds for the first business.

Also, people who really wants to transition from paid employment into business take baby steps while working and quit when they have a sense of stability.

Also, your wife stopped working without your consent.

Have a tete a tete with her and let her tell you want she wants to do and let her put her money where her mouth is.

What that means is that if she is so intent on any venture, she should invest first in it.

For instance, she wants to sew, let her save up and register herself or train herself after which you can invest in the venture.

As per money: you manange the resources of the home. This is a big responsibility and means you are in charge financially and have to lead your home financial to a very good place especially as your wife is not financially responsible.

Every spending, weigh it: is it necessary? Can we afford it? Does it tie into our financial goals? Etc.

You also need to be investing short term and long term.

I wish you goodluck.
Family › Re: Why Do Women Lose Interest In Their Husbands After Few Years In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 9:43pm On May 23, 2020
vikkimimi:
Most men stop being nice, loving and stop trying to please)make the lady happy because in their mind they've "caught the fish, what's the use of throwing worms into the water to lure them"
Without realising that after marriage the love should tripled and the value placed on the lady shouldn't drop.

Same goes to the ladies, you feel too relaxed, shop making up, don't bother getting your toiletries and stop looking good, because you feel you've gotten the man of your dreams so no need looking good...
SO WRONG
Very true.

Like they say 'why campaign after election?'.
Family › Re: Why Do Women Lose Interest In Their Husbands After Few Years In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 9:41pm On May 23, 2020
yvelchstores:
nicely said HOWEVER ma'am the game changes when the man is a manipulating selfish self righteous,never wrong, misogynist who NEVER plays fair in his crooked games and you start to ask yourself,come o, things have to change around here. when you start to loose your mind and mental health becomes a real life issue, one has to pull back and keep her head on top of water to stay alive.
I am actually talking to both parties.

This was my response to someone on the other thread for men.

I just copied and pasted here.

Hahahahahahaha @ crooked games.

It is well.

Marriages crumbling left, right and center.

And these people know how to treat others outside.
Career › Re: Nigerians Raised $68k On Twitter For A 20year Old Aramide To Study In Harvard by bukatyne(f): 9:15pm On May 23, 2020
Jamezafolabi40:
Aramide Akintimehin, a young first class graduate of Covenant University, who gained admission into Harvard University but had to seek for support to raise her tuition in Harvard totalling to $85k including $19k Scholarship given by the school it was a testimony when the trend to donate started going viral and took the number 1 spot on the twitter trend list...

Aramide who is a young aspiring teacher, took it upon herself to go the low income communities to take children whose parent has no capacity to send to school on classes, even to the extent of empowering the parent as well. Felt the need to do more by taking course on Education in Harvard, the search for 34million naira began.

God so wonderful that even in this pandemic people still gave to such a course.

Luckily for the 20year old she was able to raise $68k with the help of people's donation on social media and offline as well.
Beautiful.

Learnt about her on Adeola's 'Keeping it real' program.
Family › Re: Why Do Women Lose Interest In Their Husbands After Few Years In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 9:01pm On May 23, 2020
I will lift what I just wrote in the other thread directed to men in response to someone:

Honestly, there is a war against marriages.

How spouses would be more tender to bosses, subordinates, friends, random people, neighbors, colleagues, classmates than themselves is worrisome.

When it comes to their spouse, 'I won't take it, I can't do it, I can't compromise a little, it is my way or no way'...

'I, I, I, I' and yet will place on their CV as 'team players; ability to negotiate; ability to work under pressure' bla bla.

Practice these skills at home.
Family › Re: Why Do Men Lose Interest In Their Wives After Few Years In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 8:58pm On May 23, 2020
squad03:
Absent communication wrecks a lot of marriages.
Husband thinks wife should know what he'll like to eat
Wife thinks husband should know what she wants for her birthday......una mouth na for decoration?

Husband is shouting 'respect'
Wife is shouting 'love'...no one is listening to the other.

No spontaneity!That date night keeps getting postponed till there's enough money in the bank,we all know that date will pend for 7 years if you wait for 'the right amount of hammer to nack ya account'...whenever you promise a woman an outing,even if you can't meet up with what you had initially planned,just take your woman on a stroll to buy boli and epa 3 streets away...

Call and check on their spouse,MBA but they'll be writing 'dear' after every sentence with a random person.


We put 1&1 together and we decide not to waste our talent, save your 'interest' for when you have hypertension,diabetes or an enlarged prostate and a gulley in your funds and you require devoted attention ,then we will check how far you've come on 'balanced diet'.

The grass is greener on the other side because it's constantly watered.
@Bold:

Honestly, there is a war against marriages.

How spouses would be more tender to bosses, subordinates, friends, random people, neighbors, colleagues, classmates than themselves is worrisome.

When it comes to their spouse, 'I won't take it, I can't do it, I can't compromise a little, it is my way or no way'...

'I, I, I, I' and yet will place on their CV as 'team players; ability to negotiate; ability to work under pressure' bla bla.

Practice these skills at home.
Family › Re: Why Do Nigerian Women Endure Abuses In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 8:43pm On May 23, 2020
MMotimo:
Looking good, I saw what you did a few pages back wink You dodged "the garbage truck."

Dyt
I salute your courage. That emotional /mental strength to leave is in short supply for women all over the world, rich or poor, who are victims of abuse
smiley cheesy

Thanks a lot.
Music/Radio › Re: What Music Are You Listening To Right Now? by bukatyne(f): 8:41pm On May 23, 2020
Dyt:
Thanks
smiley
Family › Re: Why Do Nigerian Women Endure Abuses In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 8:33pm On May 23, 2020
Family › Re: How Do You Call Relate With Your Wife's Elder Sister. by bukatyne(f): 8:18pm On May 23, 2020
Rogosa:
Do u need explanation on that? Babe. You can only understand if you are from the Yoruba tribe
Give unto Caesar want belongs to Caesar.
Literature › Re: 'The Palmwine Drinkard' By Amos Tutuola & How It Relates To Social Media Slaying by bukatyne(f): 8:16pm On May 23, 2020
TripleOh7:
You are very correct. Was trying to remember the song attached to that story.
smiley
1 Like
Literature › Re: 'The Palmwine Drinkard' By Amos Tutuola & How It Relates To Social Media Slaying by bukatyne(f): 8:15pm On May 23, 2020
Ishilove:
This is news to me! Are you serious?
Yeah cheesy
Music/Radio › Re: What Music Are You Listening To Right Now? by bukatyne(f): 8:11pm On May 23, 2020
Dyt:
Bukatyne

Turn your lights down low

How do y'all get the link?
undecided undecided undecided undecided

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VitKvID-uvY

Just copy and paste from YouTube
Family › Re: Is marriage worth it?I urgently need your advise. by bukatyne(f): 3:06pm On May 23, 2020
Honesty001:
ok I will beg him, because I have never begged him.We have been married for 3 years.
First step

Show deep remorse and appreciate him for his provision, faithfulness and child care abilities.

Goodluck smiley
Family › Re: Is marriage worth it?I urgently need your advise. by bukatyne(f): 3:01pm On May 23, 2020
crackland:
Questionable self-worth, unhealthy emotional dependency, lack of confidence, etc..
And good old revenge.

And it is easy for such people to snap because anyone who would marry someone for revenge is not in a balanced place.
Family › Re: Is marriage worth it?I urgently need your advise. by bukatyne(f): 2:59pm On May 23, 2020
Honesty001:
'Respect'means doing everything he wants me to do.I have asked him several times.
Did he give examples? How does he want them done?

The truth is that you CAN'T do everything your husband wants you to do.

You can't even do everything he NEEDS you to do talk more of his wants.

This is where love and understanding would have helped.

What does he want/need you to do? How does he want them done? What constraints do you have?

I think you should beg his forgiveness first. He hasn't forgiven you for insulting him while he was 'toasting you'.
Family › Re: Is marriage worth it?I urgently need your advise. by bukatyne(f): 2:54pm On May 23, 2020
Honesty001:
Na wa o.It is well
Have you tried apologized to your husband for treating him shabbily during courtship?

He keeps mentioning you don't respect him. Ask him what 'respect' means to him.

You also mentioned he wants you to start a business since no Legal firm around? What business do you want to do? What funds would be used to finance it?
Family › Re: Is marriage worth it?I urgently need your advise. by bukatyne(f): 2:51pm On May 23, 2020
crackland:
You're my woman crush today.

In my opinion, the man should never have married her after all that negativity she threw at him. Him sef get im own for body...

For now, they should manage themselves together.
For me, that is a very red flag.

Someone treats you shabbily and you go ahead to marry them?

My next question is why?
Family › Re: Is marriage worth it?I urgently need your advise. by bukatyne(f): 2:45pm On May 23, 2020
UjuJoan2:
Who among us didn't treat a toaster bad? Do you know what it feels like to be in your prime and have so many men after you? It gets into our head, even the best of us.
Some men are so desperate that the only way to get rid of them is to insult them outrughtly.

But this poster made a mistake, you never go back . . Never. It's like a golden rule. You don't insult a man today, and then marry him tomorrow.

So oga knows she married him because she had no other choice, of course his own shakara will start now.

So yes, she made her bed . . . Let her lie on it
@bold: Ibi ti a ti ni 'odaro', a kin so 'ekale'.

Where you have said good night/goodbye, you don't say good evening.


That's what came to mind when I read the story.
Literature › Re: 'The Palmwine Drinkard' By Amos Tutuola & How It Relates To Social Media Slaying by bukatyne(f): 1:56pm On May 23, 2020
@Ishilove,

Nice one.

Can't remember The Palmwine Drunkard.

But 'The Complete Gentleman' is timeless.

According to folklore, the song 'Ori, Ori o! Olajumoke nlo....' is from that story.

Excellent relation to the SM plague.
2 Likes 1 Share
Family › Re: Is Nairaland Anti-women ? by bukatyne(f): 1:46pm On May 23, 2020
Nairaland is anti everything:

Women, men, boy children, girl children, feminists, anti-feminists, Christians, Muslims, Athetists, Igbos, Yorubas, Hausas, APC, PDP etc.

It is not a woman only problem. undecided

It is a reflection of our values in Nigeria.
Family › Re: Marital Problem by bukatyne(f): 3:26pm On May 22, 2020
M
Family › Re: I Cause Pain To A Lot Of People by bukatyne(f): 1:10pm On May 22, 2020
.
Family › Re: Why Do Nigerian Women Endure Abuses In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 7:55am On May 22, 2020
Plead:
Your comparisons makes no sense. Imagine comparing domestic abuse to toxic bosses and work environment.

You obviously beat up your wife that’s why you posted that rubbish.
What is the difference between a toxic work environment and a toxic marriage?
Family › Re: Why Do Nigerian Women Endure Abuses In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 11:37pm On May 21, 2020
Lsofdk:
[color=teal] grin grin grin

Btw, I love the songs you dropped, mind dropping some more wink [/color]
cheesy

Tomorrow
Family › Re: What's Making You Depressed? by bukatyne(f): 11:37pm On May 21, 2020
rockstarB:
I replied
Tomorrow dear. smiley

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