₦airaland Forum

Apb0012016:
She should just leave the guy

Wish i had such lady sha

Ginaz:
He yells at her , talk rudely , he basically feels like a king and she’s a slave .

Jeablue:
use a condom for a wife I legally married? I respect you alot but I don't expect this from you

Jeablue:
both you see not a single item even flask I never buy for the baby

Augla1:
I just need advice, not on any particular thing but on Life generally.


Thanks as we keep 'em coming!!!

Jeablue:
As most Pregnant women experience a variety of emotions and life changes. Also most first-time dads have their own feelings and concerns to deal with, too.

I feel shocked, panicked, overwhelmed, scared. Emotional and happy � too but,
I feel like am just not ready

Am I alone?

Will this will require a major adjustment?

This is a great blessing to me but am scared especially I don't have any saving or functional work yet.

How do you feel being a dad during your time?

How where you able to buy the most necessary and important things for the baby?

How did you take care of your child naming ceremony?

How much did you spent?

And how do you feel being a father?

QuinModah:
Good morning,

My cousins is planning to get a wife from the village because he believes village girls are immaculate and unpromiscious. I dont know. Some of my cousins are beginning to rationalize with him.


Thank you in advance for your input

truthsayer009:
You see the problem?

People don't want to put in any effort but want everything to come to them.

I have a female friend who is hell bent on marrying a white guy too. I keep asking her, what steps have you taken? Are you applying for scholarships to relocate? No. Are you applying for PRs? No. Are you applying for jobs abroad? No.

She is just waiting for a white guy to pick her up from Oriental hotel, 4Point hotel and relocate her.

See ehn, they all just want baby girl lifestyle. Zero input.

Ctorch:
https://twitter.com/imosocials/status/1391672716093177861?s=19[/quote]He should marry her corpse before burial and she will bear his name in the obituary

We must have sense bye force

sammymax:
So I discovered that my landlord bypassed his meter because our light git spoilt and I was trying to fix it. This is the same man that you cannot owe light bill. I had a disagreement with him so he already gave me quit notice. So now that I know that all the money I have ever paid him has been pocketed I want to report him but my friend said it's not necessary that I am already leaving the house. I'm I totally wrong

UyaiIncomparabl:
To where, exactly?

family6644:
I need serious advise from experienced nairalanders, please forgive my lengthy message because it requires detailed explanations.

I lost my wife exactly 3 months ago, 4 years of relationship and 13 years of marriage with her before she passed on, she left behind 3kids, 13yr old girl 7yr and 3yr old boys. I understand marriages are full of their challenges but we have been through the journey and we came out victorious having a loving and happy home, a union other partners appreciates.

My late wife was so organized and we trainned my kids to be independent while she travels on local business trips. So I just needed to continue our family habit of buying and stocking everything at home while they manage themselves with the help of an older maid who has been part of the family for many years, in short, we are faring quite well as I continue to mourn my wife and carry on with life.

Here is the problem, from a lot of condolence messages coming in on my Facebook, I had the chance to reply some of them 2weeks ago, I met this single mother of two who invited my kids to her daughter's birthday party, i was reluctant but she said it is time to start taking the kids out since they are yet to resume school, exactly what they needed at that point was the usual outing which has been missing for a while since their mother's sickness and after her demise, approx 6months in total. She said it's not a loud party that she needed only my kids for the small sitting room party.

I decided, went to the party with the kids, it was fun for the kids, I have not seen them happy like that in a long while, it made me happy too, they fell in love with the two sisters and their mother all like a miracle, my little 3year old boy started calling her mommy, others follow and it all seem like a family reunion. We left late at night with her girls asking that they meet again the next day which was a Sunday. To cut it short, my kids and hers agreed to meet the next day except for me. To be honest, the lady is a nice and lovely person to be with, she's a realtor who can work from home, she's real and beautiful, she has been a single mother for 4yrs after her husband travelled out and abandoned them to marry another woman, that's according to her.

She called me that her kids could not allow her rest, they said if we can't come, she should bring them to our house, I mildly rejected but i was persuaded by my daughter and my first son to have them around, I could see that they have bonded quite well, I want my kids to be happy too, that's what I have always wanted for them so I agreed and gave them our address. To cut the story short, I find it impossible to separate the two families that has come together to become one, when they were leaving back to their house my kids pleaded with me to allow them go with mommy to her house, I understand that is real because she's lovely with kids. I had the confidence to trust my kids with someone for the first time in my life. They didn't want to come back, I had to go and pick them up the next day, all of them made sure they came back home with me, we started living together as a family and everyone was enjoying it.

It became an automatic affair with her, I was worried about it been too early, I had to involve few of my friends to seek opinions, some were happy that i could get a good mother for my kids this soon, others asked me to stop the family union and give it a little time to study her character. I suggested some space but she felt very bad, she thinks I am sending them away. I had to allow them stay while I use the opportunity to observe the new found love and family.

12days after, I realize that in a bid to reorganize me and help me to move ahead in life, she totally disregards anything that concerns my late wife whom I still hold dear to my heart, same as my daughter and my adopted daughter, I don't like to address her as a maid. We loved and cherished my late wife, everything she introduced seems to be strange to the norms of the family. If I try to raise my concerns for her to adjust, she will simply tell me that the dead is dead and I should just forget everything about her including whatever she stood for as a mother and wife.

If I try to talk some senses into her to make her understand that brooding over the dead is different from honouring and respecting the deseased, she gets really angry claiming I am comparing her with a dead person. Whatever she discovers as our way of doing things in the family she disregards it and replaces it with her own way without minding how we feel as a family or how easy or difficult it is for us to adjust.

It looks like we are the only ones tolerating and accommodating them here, I have tried with no avail to stop her from insulting the memory of my late wife. I discussed with each and everyone at home, they all wish I could perform a miracle to have them leave because no one can tolerate the mother and kids anymore, I am equally fed up myself and willing to take a break.

I have a friend who is aware of my problems with her, he told me that I am the problem here, he said it will be hard for any woman to fit into our family way of doing things and it will be difficult for us to cope with a different way of life introduced by another woman.

I hope I can get one or two advices that could help. I am quite confused

Hmfathom:
How can my parent especially mum feels like she can make my marriage decision for me..

I was once with a lady which she goes against at the end I left that lady,now for about 5 years have been with my lady and ready to get married to her but my mum still feel she can make decision for me..

She giving me attitude and always want to find fault in her.If I say this or that she will end up saying she had giving me something diabolic to eat to go against her say!!!

I am sure if it was dangote daughter I was going to get married to..I am sure they wouldn't have problems with that. Why are some parents like this.

I am just tired of her questioning my decision, for over 8 years..have been living on my own and sustaining my self without any body's help

Sometimes, the way she talks to dad I don't like it and she feels I would be gentle like him..

She is very stubborn, if you feel you don't want to call her to instill your decision..she won't also call..at last I will still be the one to call because I feel it's naturally ideal to check on your parent..

Have sat her down to talk to her sometimes and after sometimes she changes..I detest this kind of attitude,she doesn't know she has bad attitude if you talk she will insult your life from the beginning of your existence!

Please,mature minds..how can I go about this ...how can I say my yes is my yes..how can I make them understand the fact that it's my life and I will take full responsibility of my decision...
How can I also correct her bad attitide??why is it hard for people to understand that nobody is perfect..

I don't have anybody to talk to,that was why I created new account.
Please help contribute

Whizzdom:
On Sunday, last two weeks my mom got a bank alert notification, someone sent her 3 million naira, she wasn't expecting money from anyone.

She was shocked, she called I and my younger sister. We couldn't believe it, so we waited for three days to see if the bank will reverse the money, they didn't, so I and my sister took our mom's ATM card to withdraw and test if the money was genuine.

We bought three phones from it. That's when we believed it was real. Then I transferred #50,000 to my bank and transferred #50k into my mom's other account which we used for foodstuffs.

On the fifth day the bank froze the remaining balance of the huge money sent. But no bank official or staff called my mom. That week passed, on the 3rd day of the second week, one lady called my mom by phone in the afternoon, she said her name is Sarah from so so bank.

My mom is not literate so they spoken in pidgin, she told my mom that she knows that my mom received a #3mil last two weeks and she has spent out of it. That the money was government money. Sarah told my mom to go to any nearest ........bank and write a mandate letter authorizing the bank to unfreeze the remaining #2mil in her acct and the bank will give us the beneficiary account which she will send the money back to. And we should return the money we spent out of it immediately.

When we got to my mom's bank, we went to customer agent area, instead of writing the mandate letter, we told the agent everything that happened leaving nothing untouched. the agent said we should give him the number of the staff that called us, when he called the Sarah with his phone, Sarah gave him another name, instead of introducing herself as Sarah, she said her name is Evelyn. She now told the agent to hold my mom down till she (Evelyn) gets to that bank to arrest my mom or whatever.

The agent said on what basis would he hold my mom down. The agent checked the description when the money was sent and he couldn't understand the description. He was saying how could this be government money. He told my mom to try and return the money spent and he told us to go.

The description on the transfer when it came in on Sunday was: "National Procurement of Scanners" #3million.

Is this truly a government money?

Nairalanders what are your opinions? Because my mom is scared, Sarah or Evelyn bullied her on the phone with jail time.

I don't know what to do.

Misternas89:
During my postgraduates program in one of these federal uni, I’ve got this particular female friend who’s all over me asking me questions, advices and suggestions as if I studied Guidance and counseling. I woke up to received her message again, this time around it’s something I can’t just give my verdicts and my brain is “full” already. I would be glad to receive some suggestions on what to do from you guys here. As I always says I’ve got my intelligent guys and ladies on Nairaland, now the text goes thus;
@
“My husband wants to quit his high paying IT job and start his laundry business. My parents are totally against it. I am finding it difficult to choose either of them. What should I do?“
Cc Lalasticlala kindly help move this to the ministry boss.
Mynd and boss Lalasticlala abeg move this to the ministry let’s learn together

nnadychuks:
Good morning nairalanders.
Over the past week I’ve not been myself, neither has my mum.
The complain started about two weeks ago, after she returned from my uncle's burial, she complained of intense fever. This fever I’m talking about I’m not sure it’s the normal one you see everyday. I mean her body was shaking like a generator, but we were able to subdue the symptoms by recommending malaria-typhoid medications alongside “orphesic” as she’s an ulcer patient.
Fast forward to last Saturday, the condition I saw my mum, I mean I was even scared. She’s always strong, or at least she could manage herself. This time the symptoms became worse. The fever doubled and she complained also of pains in the lower part of her stomach, not neglecting the pounding headaches. We rushed her to a hospital and she was put on bed rest.
The fever lasted for 2+ days. even after medications, It seemed like nothing was getting better.
They’ve managed to subdue the fever as of today but she barely eats anything. We’ve forced her and she only managed to drink tea and chew some biscuit. We’ve prepared hot pap now but no appetite still.
People are suggesting we take her out of the hospital and take her to one prominent man of God, but I believe typhoid doesn’t respond to medications well. It takes time and I believe there’s a right medication.
Pls good people, help us to take my mother out of this her constant pain

Lovecars501:
No vex,but i don't know how to handle it,that's why i brought it on nairaland

Ogamysamo:
why is it that;
when a child acted bravely, wisely, brilliantly or something else but positively, the father always take the glory to himself while the mother only have the remnant. but when he or she acted cowardly, foolishly, stupidly or anything close to negative, the father always transfer the shame and reproach to the mother by refering to them as..... [e.g, you see your son, daughter or children?] as if she pick them from the street like wasted containers and dump them in his house without his approval or against his wish?

Icon2007:
Pls house kindly suggest possible solution to this problem my wife put to bed in late January 2021 and since then she was fine and the baby was fine untill these last three weeks late april till now she was having high blood pressure. We have done all the necessary test and they are all fine apart from cholesterol level which is at 216 against the normal 200.

Pls advise medically or otherwise.

Thanks

Nihilist000:
I’m not in a relationship with either of them but thanks for the advice.

donvoice:
I have seen many things under the sun but this is quiet disheartened.

What actually does women want

tayeloveme4rel:
am single but i notice this among my company of friends

BaddieFreak:
Why do men come back after a breakup instead of moving on?

You still want her, why leave at first?

Nihilist000:
Here’s my story,There’s this girl I’ve known since high school,I had a crush on her back then but she didn’t give a sh*t about me, this was like 7 years ago. After high school we started talking more and more and she eventually grew to like me and develop an even bigger crush on me. At this point I wasn’t into her so much anymore but I kept up with the whole thing. I’d ghost her and come back and ghost her again and repeat the circle but she still maintained this crush on me for years up till now. Through out these years,I never took advantage of her attraction to me, I never touched her and even practically avoided seeing her physically because I didn’t want to hurt her or break her heart. Last year December, we had this little fight because she nagged me so much and I lost it and told her somethings which she took the wrong way and stopped talking to me. I apologized and after forming for me for days(which irritated me) she forgave me and we moved on. Last month I eventually traveled abroad to get a medical degree, she increased her calls and texts and I didn’t mind because I just felt she was scared I’d ghost her. Now a week ago, she called me on video call and kept her camera shut off as usual because she’s shy,I told her we couldn’t continue making video calls like this without me seeing her face and then I offered to add somebody else to our video call to make it more interesting, she thought I was kidding but I added up this other girl who she knew I was friends with. I gisted a bit with the new friend and eventually ended the video call when I noticed the first girl was mute and wasn’t saying anything. Immediately after, I received a text from her saying she’s really tired and would be going to bed now. It’s been a week+ now since then and we’ve not texted each other. I personally don’t want to text her because I don’t want her making the whole thing a big deal and making me apologize when I did nothing wrong. Note: I am not in a relationship with this girl, never have been, only flirted occasionally when I was bored.

What should I do guys? Did I do anything wrong and if so, should I apologize?

Mrskillz1:
I am from a family of three. I have two brothers. One older and the other younger than me so I'm the only girl in my family.

I grew up seeing my Mom mad.
By my teen age, I got admission into Nnamdi Azikiwe University alongside my elder brother who was to study Engineering. By the time I was in my finals, my brother was getting ready for IT. One day, his roommate sent for me, he said they couldn't sleep the night before because my brother was talking to himself. Before we knew what was happening, my brother was getting violent and so we took him home and he never got back to finish school.
I proceeded with my education and finished. Went for NYSC. While serving the nation, My Mom died. When I got home, she'd been buried.
But my brother was still mad.

I later got job, took my brother to a Psychiatric hospital and the doctor after examining him said he is Schizophrenic. He was asked to stay in the hospital.
I paid. He then stayed there for one month. When I came to visit him, he pleaded with me to take him home that he didn't like it there.

So I took him home. Every month, I buy drugs for him and he gets injected. He usually puts up a fight but with the help of my younger brother, neighbors and a certain nurse, he receives the injection, forcefully and against his will.
Often times, he pleads with me not to inject him, the very time I obliged him, he scattered things, didn't allow the neighborhood sleep, talked throughout some nights and wouldn't eat sometimes. He looked really sick then but with the injection, one will hardly know he's not normal.
I told him that I won't let him miss his injection ever again.

Now, on Monday, my younger brother woke up and was unusually quiet. He normally wakes up and begins to play music with his phone or he will turn to football channel and watch until I leave for work. But I didn't go to work on Monday and I noticed he was quiet, then I asked him why he's quiet. He didn't respond. After some hours, I asked my Dad if he feels he's okay, My Dad said that he wants to be quiet and that I should let him be.

Then, that night, around 4am, my brother began to talk. He was shouting and some of the things he said were not coherent. He talked out of point. I and my Dad, with my elder brother surrounded him and I couldn't help crying when my Dad was cautioning him to keep quiet and he refused.
Neighbours thought it was my elder brother's voice they'd heard that night but by the time they heard in the morning that it was my younger brother, they visited my Dad in the evening. By then, my brother was still talking and even burnt his clothes yesterday.
My Dad got a few guys to chain him because he was violent yesterday when I left the house.
I know the problem is spiritual. I have prayed, fasted for my elder brother and now this!
I'm so unhappy.

Can someone suggest a place I can take my two brothers to so they can be cured, please.

22brains:
A friend of mine is seriously facing depression as a result of how old he's grown.

He disclosed his intentions to me that he wants to commit suicide because of the stigma of not able to do what his mates does that include age limit in the society.

With the love he has for the Nigeria military, he has applied to become a soldier severally but got disqualified on the basis of age. He applied for so many others with the same result.

His age mates who doesn't know much about his situation call him daddy, papa, old man which further worsen his state of mind.

He got fed up when his bank management denied him access to his account with the BVN he presented to make some accounting correction. They said his age on the BVN difer from his looks. They accused him of age falsification.

He was born on 1st of September 1996 but he actually look 30yrs older than his real age.

The question is, what could be the cause of him growing old everyday and how do I make him see positive reasons not to kill himself?