₦airaland Forum

Nazgul:
The rule of the thumb when drinking with your so called friends are as follows...

1. Always finish your drink before going to urinate.

2. Never drink from a glass whenever you're drinking with more than one person, always request for straw.

3. After coming back from the toilet, and you want another drink, request for another straw as well. Don't use the same straw you left behind.

4. Never discuss your success with friends over a drink. It's most likely going to stir up their envy.

5. Don't join them in eating anything you didn't personally order for, be it meat, ponmo, gizzard, chicken, pepper soup...etc.

If you follow these rules, you'll live long.

All your rules don't hold a candle to these:

1. If you must drink, buy your drinks and have them in front of your TV at home.

2. Better than the last one.... DON'T EVEN DRINK!

Before you argue, remember, ALCOHOL ITSELF, IS A POISON!

ManirBK:
https://dailytrust.com/fg-opens-workshops-for-nigerians-to-convert-vehicles-to-autogas/

Until we learn that gas is actually being subsidised and the real price is like ₦1k per kg.

Then they will open shop to convert vehicles to burn vegetable soup.

Rayban25:
i dont know why youre lamenting. far as i am concerned what youre going through is good for you.

what are you doing with such amount of children? you didnt think of economy? you didnt do family planning because you prioritized sexual pleasure and being a sharpshooter instead of living within your means. na you sabi.

The matter, ehn......5 kids?

I earn much more than 40k.... I mean, a lot more, yet I'm complaining, with only 2 kids.

In his shoes, I'll just keep quiet, because I won't even know what to even talk about again.

Ọmọ!

JohnBullMySon:
Lol. You think he's the one who did it himself?

Most likely he told his police escort to handle them. That's how many big men behave in Nigeria.

Instead make guy man pray make e no get problem with big man for Naija, e dey beat chest over notin.

If 8 MOPOL descend on his ass, can he do anything?

Pessin wey den go kill troway or pass as a kidnapper, end of story.

geesilver:
Maybe she trys to intimidate the opponent with a better boobs

The joy of winning sometimes makes you do something crazy, just like this.

Maybe she's tryna tell the world she ain't a tran......

HanisahZuwy:
Today, I went to a government/general hospital to see a doctor. When I got there, I got card and waited for my turn to see the doctor. Then it was finally my turn and I went in, told the doctor the symptoms I'm experiencing, and then he referred me to the lab for a culture test.

When I got to the lab, I went to the cashier to make payments for the test and thereafter waited for my turn. When it was finally my turn, some documentations were made, instrument for the culture collection was given to me and I was referred to a woman who would handle the culture test.

When I got to her(the woman), she pointed to an enclosure, that I should enter there, UnCloth, lie on the raised bed and open my legs. So, I went in, then came out immediately to ask her if I can collect it myself. She said no, that I won't do it well, that I would just get the surface and won't go deep. So, I agreed. I went in, undressed, got on the bed and open my legs. So, she came and collected the specimen. This was somehow painful because she had to go very deep. After collecting the specimen, she then went to put it in the instrument that was given to me earlier, then came back immediately and said 'keep it up' with a thumbs up sign from her.

Since then, I've been wondering what she meant by that. Does anyone here have a clue what that could mean?

She's seen a lot of girls' lady-bits, and she can tell you're a good girl.

You know they can tell what's been happening down there by examination, right?

That's just it.

Ikpeyi:
https://dailytrust.com/n620-per-litre-this-isnt-what-we-voted-for-kano-resident-laments/

We know what you voted for, you religiously biased doofus!

You voted for muslim-muslim ticket!

All you assholes who voted because they thought it was "jihad", hope you're enjoying the show?

These are just opening credits, fa!

De real show neva start!

Suffering makes us band together in Nigeria.

Ijelenwanyioma:
I am legally married to this man and we have 3 sons together. Recently he purchased some land which he actually told me about but when I checked the documents of all the land I only saw Mr(his name in full) and not Mr & Mrs (his name and surname) or Mr (his name ) and Mrs (My name ). This really gave me great concern and when I asked him, he told me it doesn't really count because the properties also belong to my children. Later he started accusing me that I am nursing ulterior motive in my heart and maybe I want to take over the properties which is blantly lies. I just want to feel ownership of the land too

Please am I overreacting on this issue truly or my husband is planning something behind me ( maybe remarrying)

Hmmmm......if you bought the land together now, I would say there's a problem.

You said HE bought the land. And you want your name in the documents. Because it's land, ba? Do you ask for same when he buys a phone? What of when he buys a pair of shoes?

Anyway, since he's decided not to include your name, you should calm down and buy your own, if you can.

The attitude in most marriages is the wife telling the husband "what's mine is mine, what's yours is ours". Women need to stop this.

The man should have the right to will whatever he wants to whomever he likes, in his will.

This is why wills exist. People own their stuff and give it to whomever they damned well wish after they die

Just be a good wife and stop this act of yours. It makes men paranoid.

Japa007:
I always have this nauseating feeling anytime someone mentions 'lagos'. , A very terrible slum, you can lose ur life at any minute..

I pity any sane human being thinking of basing in lagos

I agree with you.

Aba is better

Especially that prime piece of real estate after Alaoji as you head towards PH, where refuse has covered one lane of a Federal Highway.

It's madness to expect her not to.

Orderabove:
.
God damn. scamming is now getting too much in the country. may God save us.

First page finally!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oya, send Seun your account details.

shiwex:
Its not a donation, This was built with tax payers money .

I refuse to accept that, because it only makes things worse.

Hmmmmm......

E be like say OP wan hear stories dat touch today.

Well, it's more likely we will hear takes of woe than wonderful stories, anyway.

People wey don dey chop better no go wan show to avoid billing.

Na waa o

dfrost:
It has started

I will believe when I see it.

Up to seven police still.follow one big man come area where we dey, just 2 days ago.

No be former anytin o, just a rich man who is likely a friend to Oga@DTop

CodeTemplar:
What nonsense Pulaaku is this one trying to sell? Under Buhari they borrowed heavily and shared to the hinterlands of the north yet he couldn't lift anyone out of P alone talk less of the their wuruwuru POVERTY they have perfected how to use to attract oil money. So it is only the north where the poor are? Almajiri is a tradition and culture so isn't a sign of poverty. I read somewhere that even Dangote passed through the system.They produce food most so what endemic poverty or hunger is fueling them to afford AK47 and embark on kidnapping sprees of their fellow poor for ransoms of millions of naira.

I see the wisdom in allowing food imports now. If the south embracesa combo of local food production and import,the north will find it harder to sell their banditry inflated foods across borders and have a rethink about this whole staged amnesty push they call insecurity.

I just wonder if "PULAAKU" is in our constitution, or if it's related to "BULABAA".

The degree of arrant nonsense APC has visited on Nigeria cannot be quantified of even imagined.

Naija politicians and nonsense be like 5&6.

See wetin Iyabo donate give school!

Shay she wan make e collapse kill pipu pikin ni?

God1000:
That guy is causing serious havoc and mayhem in Southeast.

He shouldn't be allowed to continue issuing the nonsense sit at home orders

I don't know why anybody will even listen to such person

Of course, he's being used as an agent of oppression in the SE.

That's why he's roaming free.

The same reason the bandits are not only free, they're being conferred with titles!

Remember, Kanu and Igboho were arrested outside Nigeria, but UGM, Bello Turji and co are roaming free in Nigeria.

001Lagos:
Where was gani Adams when Fulani people conquered Ilorin kwara state

Mtchew

But seriously, I think it's about time that Simon ekpa is killed . He's a terrorist and should be taken out .

He wasn't born yet.

Do you understand that?

helinues:
The money is meant for the vulnerable most especially the old people.

Those able youths salivating should better go and look for work cos it won't reach them

And for the "vulnerable", ₦8k will do what, exactly?

Feed them for, like, 3 days?

Then, what?

Zonefree:
Marriage is overrated!

How do you know?

Fryx:
Lol. My tongue's only used to roll foods into my oesophagus.

Will definitely see a dentist. Just want to know what options are available.

Doing a census of guys like you w.r.t the bolded.......

Total number in Nigeria: ZERO.

NgeneUkwenu:

You think IPOB are the current gunmen terrorising the SE?

She sang simple, beautiful songs with clear messages.

She was well accepted back when most youths valued stuff like that.

Nowadays, na Naira Marley and Portable be dem role model.

jaelz:
What I Just Discovered About Women

A woman loses respect for a man or her current boyfriend once she starts getting intimate with someone that is richer and more well to do than him

Hear my story out before you judge me:

So I lost my ex about 2 months back when she became a Personal Assistant to a serving senator, I just noticed that she stopped appreciating the little money and things that I usually gave her and did for her since she started working with the senator.

She was staying at her parents house in Abuja but recently rented a place for herself and furnished it to taste, I was shocked and I asked how a girl that just started a personal assistant job with a senator and a salary of just 120k per month is able to rent a self contained apartments of about 750k per year and even furnished it to taste, she got very angry and said I should be happy for her that if I can't do it atleast she did it herself.

She has also never allowed me to stay in the house 🏠🏡 for once not to talk of coming to visit her

You just dodged a bullet, Bro!

Just do Thanksgiving and move on.

TemplarLandry:
Give it up for Baba Tinubu!
#RenewedHope.

If you bothered to read the shitt he's about to do, you wouldn't rush to support it....... Unless you're a shitt-eater yourself, in which case, it's all right, and you're just doing your normal stuff.

feedthenation:
---One of the best scouting manager for Chelsea---

The best.

mariahAngel:
Are you waiting till she gets pregnant?
That "embarrassment" might be what would save her from ruining her future.

You found out for a reason, so do something about it.
If not, you might regret not doing so on time.

Pregnancy is even better.

If she no go carry disease that can render her barren for life or even kill her.

OYEDIPE:
We paid but our amiable Jagaban administered it.

Dude, na WE pay de money.

naijapikin2:
Hmmm
This tinubu has started on a good footing. It's too early to say o. That's how baba buhari started too.
Let's wait and see. Not the one that he will now go back in 3 years time to borrow borrow and borrow us to slavery

You and I paid that money, not Tinubu.