₦airaland Forum

don89:
That is always the problem with single mothers, they always go back to their baby daddies for sex, because they have shared blood and the blood is running inside them ,making them attracted to their baby daddy.

Didn't anyone tell you that the vagina is a self cleansing organ? After sex, if there is no egg available, the semen dies and is flushed out by the uterus after a maximum of 6 days. Which blood are you sharing?
Ohhhh, now I see why a lot of guys are dispensing their semen all over the place, they thought those women will come back for sex!

Rawtruth1:
BEWARE of divorced women and single mothers. Ask questions why the legs that went there ran away. They are deep ditches waiting to swallow the gullible

Beware of baby daddies and divorced men, Nigerian women can endure bad marriages, why did their women run away?

streetsoldier1:
It's a wrong reasoning to conclude on what you know nothing about. I did no one favour and never acted like god. Can't you just keep shut if you have nothing to say

Did you end your marriage based on facts and evidence or on suspicion?
What did she do with her ex?
You gave us so little information to go on
From your post even a child can deduce that you judge your wife because she is a single mother.

victorian:
The reasons are not baseless o.

Yes alot of ladies will pray to be in her shoes but not every lady would want to be in her shoes.
For example : all through last year, suitors were coming but they all. Wanted me to close down my company and be a full time house wife.

Why? They were scared men will keep wooing me even after marriage and it's best to lock me up and not work. Just eat, fucvk, drink and breed babies.

Sighs
I was virtually crying to one old man who's my friend at my office building. I told him why are men like this?

Why should I close up what makes me happy, give me joy and keeps my brain working. And Just stay at home and be watching telemundo day in day out! But why are men this selfish!
Why must I shut down this part of my life, just because I want to marry!

It's not fair! I rather remain single ,keep running my company, meet people everyday than marry and just seat at home and keep getting fatter everyday with kids running around. Why cant I have both!

Guess what the old man said?

What kind of a devil would ask you to shut down your ticket to future peace and financial freedom for whatever reason
Please keep forging ahead, a good man will come soon. Just keep weeding out the trash.
What did the old man say?

Luckyzil:
We have been approved. And the cells are stem cell, which is mother of all cells. It will only produce the cell required by the body for its healing or cure.

Has stem cell therapy been approved in Nigeria. What about provisions for complications because if those cells are natural, they must have been gotten from a person and how are you sure that the donor cells will be compatible with recipient's body. Is it safe to use stem cells without Doctors supervision?

Are the cells natural or synthetic?
How are you sure the cells will be compatible with the recipient.
Are you already approved by NAFDAC or you are under verification process?

dipson4u08:
please i need the name of the school i want to get rapped, iv never been raped...

but without drugs if my pweek no stand dem go forca am?

How can you identify as female when you are male!!!!!

I read through your second post about your marriage, and I understand that your wife has built up resentment for you in her heart. It was hard for you but you need to count your blessings as you reminisce about the course your life has taken. From previous occurences you need to understand that you are not alone, this has happened to people and they have gotten through it. You need to try and contact your kids through someone from your family, they are your kids as well as your wife's. Since you are still legally married to your wife, you can still pursue legal means of maintaining contact with your kids at least.
I'm glad your wife has been able to achieve her desires, as well as you too. Hold on to what you have and don't stop trying to reach out to your kids, why don't you talk to a lawyer as soon as possible so you can arrest the situation. I believe you don't have to lose your kids just because your wife resents you.
As much as you don't really feel like it: Congratulations on becoming a Doctor, at least I aspire to that.

kunleajaye:
Here I am on the verge of graduating with a hard-earned doctorate degree. I will be defending my dissertation at the beginning of the semester in about 3 weeks, and barring any unforeseen circumstances, I will become a DSc holder. My department has offered me a position as an assistant professor, which will become official once I graduate. I have already been lecturing two courses this past year as an Adjunct Faculty. From May this year, I will henceforth be known as Dr. Adekunle Ajayi, or to put it in other terms, Adekunle Ajayi(D.Sc).

Hurray for me, right? I should be happy after all these years of hard work and sleepless nights and sacrifices, right? I should be glad that all my challenges are finally coming to an end, and I can henceforth be able to live comfortably, abi? So why do I feel so empty? Why do I feel so…unfulfilled? Why do I feel so…meh about it all? It is a big deal for someone to get a very advanced degree, especially at the doctorate level. It shows you are an expert in your field. So why do I feel so different?

I’ll tell you why. A couple of years ago I posted these two stories about issues I was going through in my marriage (I don’t feel attracted to my wife anymore - https://www.nairaland.com/3415462/dont-feel-attracted-wife-anymore and My Marriage has finally Ended -https://www.nairaland.com/4270193/marriage-finally-ended). I feel I let things drag on for too long, and though I’ve ended up achieving what I set out to achieve, it has come at very painful costs to me - my marriage and family.

In the last topic I made, I mentioned my wife moved back to Nigeria with my kids. It’s now two years they’ve been gone, and from what I’ve heard so far, she has really grown her business. I give her kudos for all that, cos I knew she was very enterprising. I once told her anything she touches turns to pure gold, and I’m happy to say that today she owns a very large catering business in Lagos. She caters for weddings, birthday celebrations, organization parties, you name it. She has grown so big that sometimes she gets contracts as far as Abuja. She also has a very big restaurant there in Lagos.

She has really been doing very well since she left here. She put our kids in very good schools. I sometimes feel guilty that I probably was holding her back from fulfilling her potential by bringing her here in the first place, but the plan all those years ago when we first came was never for us to settle down in the US. We planned on getting our degrees, work for a few years, and move back home. But as we all know, life has its own way of doing things.

Unfortunately for me, I thought once she settled down, she would come to her senses about our marriage. I know circumstances put us in the situation we found ourselves in, and since she had nothing else to do after gaining her masters degree, she decided to leave. I know she made the decision without consulting me first. I took so many people’s advice when she first left to let her be, but now, I wish I had listened to my heart and been more insistent. I didn’t get to talk to her and the kids for almost six months after she left, even though I knew she was staying with her sister all the while. No one gave me her phone number, and even my parents didn’t have it (she totally refused to let them have her number). The time I finally got to talk to her was when she went to visit my mum in Ibadan. I think she convinced her to talk to me. I spoke to my kids after a long time, and they kept asking when I was coming home to be with them. My daughter told me mummy told her I decided to leave them there in Nigeria. I was dumbfounded. Even one of the twins was very angry that their classmates always had their daddy come pick them up in school, and when would I leave Us and come pick him up from school. I felt bad, but I didn’t want to turn them against their mum by saying she was the one that decided to leave with them.

When it was their birthday and I spoke to the twins, Kenny told me that “Uncle” threw a very large birthday party for them, and that they invited all their friends from school. His brother told me this “uncle” bought them so many gifts. I asked them who this uncle was, and they said it was mummy’s friend. They were so excited by what he had done for them. The kids said he sometimes spent the night in the house(they had by then moved into their own place). I asked them where this uncle slept, and they said with their mummy in her room.

I spoke to my wife about this, demanding to know who this so-called uncle was that was lying in the same bed with her. She denied knowing what I was talking about at first, but when I told her how I got to hear, she changed tone, saying it was none of my business, and I have no right questioning who she can or cannot bring into her life. Sometimes later, when I spoke to my daughter, she told me their mum flogged the boys seriously one day for telling me things that they should not be telling me. I felt betrayed. Afterwards, I couldn’t even get to talk to my kids, and my wife told me to never call them again.

Here is the shocker though, and what is really hurting me the most – I never wanted to do this doctoral degree in the first place. After my masters, I went back to Nigeria. I hunted for a job, and when I was not forthcoming with any, decided to come back to the US. My dad pushed for me to go back for my doctoral program. I didn’t want to, but when I couldn’t find the job, I relented. I was already married for about eight months then, and though she was reluctant in coming, I convinced my wife to come along.

So what’s the point of my whole epistle? I’m not here to wallow in self-pity or beg for people’s empathy. I just want people to know that sometimes, family is more important than what you stand to achieve. You can have multiple degrees, many houses, wealth, accolades, titles and such, but of what importance is it all if you don’t have the most important people in your life to share them with? Here I am, about to finish, but with a sad and empty feeling. I feel so sad I won’t see the huge smiles on the faces of my family as I walk down the stage to be conferred the title “Doctor of Science” to me. I feel so sad the sacrifices I made over the past almost ten years of my life, dedicating everything to achieving this so-called dream, has cost me those dearest to me.

AdaoraNK:
I share with you, lets focus on career and business. We can not be dependent on them else....you already know

Every human born into this world, male or female, has a purpose to fulfill. Trust me, its not to be a second fiddle for another human's purpose. Let all women awaken to their individual purposes and go about bringing it to pass. Even if you don't have it figured out yet, your first step is important. God who created all women cannot be happy seeing all the talents and gifts He deposited in women go to waste because of misinformation and misrepresentation of His word.

CAPSLOCKED:
BROS YOUR MARRIED FRIEND IS THE FOOL HERE. HE HAS A WIFE AND MAYBE KIDS YET HE'S RUNNING AROUND TOWN CHASING SMALL GIRLS.
PUT THE BLAME ON THE MAN FOR NOT BEING A RESPONSIBLE HUSBAND. NOT THE GIRLS, WHOSE DM'S (AND VAGINAS) HE SLEEPS AND WAKES DAILY.
WHO KNOWS, MAYBE HE EVEN TELLS THEM HE'S A BACHELOR.

GOD SAVE US FROM MEN OF THESE DAYS.



SHE USE ROPE TIE THE MAN NECK LIKE GOAT?

IS THE MAN NOT THE CHASER AND SPENDER?

A MARRIED MAN SHOULD LEAVE OTHER WOMEN ALONE AND CONCENTRATE ON HIS FAMILY.

Let me guess, you're female!!!!!!
Else, why would you ask God to save you from men of these days?

Nedublinkz1:
The faithful men have no money
And the rich one's are exploring

Gbam

Nigerian women, make your own money oooo

The more money you have, the less of a god your husbands become to you

Start valuing yourselves ooooo
Make money oooo

Starboytwo:
thanks for your input, I reason that side too, at least we dey wash yoruba film, we dey see as things dey go....

But I strongly doubt things would go messy.. my siblings are all decent folks, I'd like to presume... I'm not gonna say No to any money but same time I'm not gonna sell my home cuz I'm strapped for cash...

Your statement about decent siblings got me cracking. Nigerians have a default reaction to inherited properties. Ownership and control. Only the weaklings and the down trodden look away because they can't fight.
I have yet to see smart parents who put their house in order before death. (I mean those whose properties are up for inheritance presently.

You didn't copyright those pictures!

Blackmiserable:
I don't have to prove anything to you. Once a cheat, always a cheat? You don't believe that a chronic smoker of 20 years can give up smoking? And not just smoking but any addictions.

Of course you don't have to prove anything to me.
Cheating, as the addiction you have made it to look like, can not be easily broken, a little percentage of addicted people get clean, a lot of them go back to their vices after a while.
That said, during the period when the individual was addicted, what would have spoiled would have spoiled: liver, kidneys, skin issues etc
Same for cheating partners: relationships, trust, children's emotions and well being, STIs, HIV, disrupted finances, divorce etc
These are all avoidable maladies.
So, cheating partners are not worth the pain and loss.

Even in death, people still dey die because of this man. Na real wa.

Really attractive

Haaaaaaaaaa
Awon temi leleyi oooooo
Nice work
Abeg reduce price for me when I'm ready o

Graxie:
He needs a virgin. Go ahead bro but don't open thread and claim she is now rebellious because her skin is shining and other men are talking to her. Remember she will grow.

Then he sends her back to the village, a la Toby the virgin harvester

Kamani8:
If u have evidence. And there's no concrete explanation as to why it happened and a conviction that it won't happen again.
Infidelity is the only reason that has biblical backing to seperate from one's spouse.
It's dangerous living with a cheating spouse. He can kill u to clear way for the outsider.

To corroborate your post, there is a long list of mistresses who used diabolical means to unseat the wife at home. A cheating partner is a crack in the wall, in fact, the house has become an uncompleted building. Its best to run from them.

Blackmiserable:
Wait first sef, are you married? There's almost always no concrete explanation as to why people cheat except that we have sinful remains that draws us to lust. It's that simple. So it's your own conviction that determines the future of the marriage? Once a cheat, always a cheat. Dead wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong for goodness sake.

Provide examples of repentant cheating husbands Oga, please make sure they have been married for longer than 20 years.

rain21:
why did the man get married to one woman in the first place if he knew he was a public tap? if you don't know what marriage or family means then remain single

I called someone a semen dispenser, he didn't like it

Graxie:
When this guy pregnant you tomorrow, you will open thread to blackmail others into thinking you didn't see it coming. How can you go and live with a total stranger, man that is not your relationship, claiming it's just for three months. Please while you are there, use condom. Don't let him turn you to Toby the virgin harvester.

Chai, Toby has suffered, virgin has suffered ooo
Virgin harvester!!!!

CoolJul:
fear women.

Fear Mr Tobyecole who has rounded up the entire community against an unsuspecting woman over a misunderstanding. I will ensure not to live in an estate if this is a glimpse of what estate dwellers do.

MrBrownJay1:
imagine how beautiful Beyonce is... the grace, the sexiness, the beauty... yet Jay Z still cheated on her.

I have observed that a cheating husband will eventually cheat, whether today, tomorrow, next year or after 20 years. No matter what the wife does to prevent it.
Staying faithful is a determination on the part of each partner, either husband or wife.

Awon fake it till you make it crew

Rapmoney:
Recently, I was having a discussion with a younger colleague who confided in me about some relationship issues he has been having with his girlfriend of 4 years.

They young man was of the opinion that his girlfriend has been cheating on him. According to him, she receives long and suspicious calls from 'male admirers' and this gives him worries that she could fall for any of them anytime soon. He had accosted her several times about this act and it had always ended with the response that they are 'mere admirers' and this has led to numerous quarrels between them. Some even turned physical!!!

First, I tried as much as possible to be very objective and logical. I really did not want to be biased despite the work relationship we share. As a realist, I would always state the truth even if it comes out bitter like the gall of a chicken.

From what he told me, he has been dating the girl for 4 years. I asked him if he had made any concrete plan towards tying the knot with her and his response was a negative one. After 4 years, you still dey calculate, dey estimate and approximate whether na she go be your wife or not. Ogbeni, which level you sef dey operate on? I made him to understand that problems are either caused by commission or omission. In his case, the inability or reluctance (omission) to define the relationship and attach a final destination to it through concrete visible plans is the remote cause of the problems.

Women are like flowers; they blossom today and wither away soonest when they are not plucked. You cannot date a lady for years without any concrete plans of marrying her and still turn around and accuse her of cheating on you. What would you expect her to do? If she pressures you to do the needful, you will still be the one who will quickly see her as someone trying to chain you down with marriage.

We should accept truths, no matter how painful they are. I am not in support of cheating in relationships but you do not have any right as a man, be it customary, legal or religious to demand faithfulness from a lady if you are not formally engaged to her. If the finance to coordinate a family is absent and she understands that, two of you can put heads together to see how to reach a compromise. If she is not in, then leave her and let her find her way. Don't leave her on the fence. Work harder and smarter and create a life for yourself.

Marriage is not for boys and girls. Nor be bobo and cheeseballs business. You might make her miss eligible suitors. You should not be the one to be blamed if things later go south for her.

If your inability to tie the knot stems from the fact that you are still young and want to enjoy your life, then you have no business with committed relationships. Get yourself a fvckmate on contract basis to satisfy your sexual urge. E nor dey expensive. If your inability stems from the fact that you are still watching to know whether she is the one or not after couple of years, you are not a serious fellow! Na spectator you be? Let her go. Don't be an obstacle to her marital prospects. You have no authority backed by law or custom to go haywire if you suspect she is cheating on you. My brother, her papa and mama nor know you. Na who bring drinks and kolanut come deh know. Nor be fight.

The socio-economic system witnessed by our parents is far different from what is obtainable today. Things are really not smooth for many young people. Na the one you know you sabi.

This ugly situation has made it difficult for many young ladies to meet eligible suitors. Gone are the days when people date for 7years, 8 years and 10 years. Making your girlfriend commit to only you for couple of years without her seeing any good plan of a future together with you is as bad as evil.

Time waits for nobody. If e no gree you do, ogbeni leave am. Somebody dey for everybody.

Ladies want to settle down, guys want placeholders to use dey take warm body.
Generally speaking.


OP you make sense.

Michellekabod2:
exactly, much emphasis is placed on marriage. Many people in developed countries are OK as partners. Marriage is never on their agenda initially .
There is so much pressure on females to marry,if she is not married early what will you guys call her?evening newspaper. Did Ubunja your mentor not counsel you guys against marrying a girl above 25? Or refer to older ladies as leftovers?
So don't blame ladies that place emphasis in getting the ring above every other thing because its the men that offer "Shiloh threats" or remind them constantly of how their biological clock is ticking.

It is very disheartening for a guy to date a lady for a decade only for you to breakup and after 3 months you want to marry someone else. Ladies dread this like a plague,so they rather date you shortly.
I am speaking from experience. Had a suitor who was out of a long term relationship (8+ years) and when he saw me in less than two months proposed marriage. The lady was so devastated,like she was an AIDS patient,albeit I didn't proceed with him because I didn't want to eat where another woman sowed and some other stuffs about him ..
Tell me,after investing almost a decade of her life to him and no ring do you think she will date subsequent men long?

Many ladies date for marriage and not to experience love.

Women are always wary of where a relationship is headed,and careful not to sow into a man life if she isnt guaranteed the ring,thus your gf that loves you may leave the instant a man she doesn't love ask for her hand in marriage.

I didn't create any principle for anyone,I just gave my advice based on my experience with ladies and how they view things. Most girls of marriageable age tell me they can't date a man for more than a year if he hasn't said anything about marriage,so my post was in reference to the time ladies have given themselves.
It doesn't apply to every lady.

So in a case whereby a lady is interested in marriage and the man insist thinking that direction,instead of cheating or forcing him into marriage or "waiting and hoping",is walking away not the best option?

Sensible post, very sensible.
I have seen ladies date a man for 5 years only for the guy to drop her and marry another lady in less than 6 months, at the same time there was a couple who dated for 9 years and are happily married today. In my observation, it depends on the guy's determination. Like someone said up there, if after a year he is not saying anything about marriage, walking away is the best option.

maynation:
Tanchu I'm married.
Not even after you've searched for my own image too.

HML to you

In short, Heather Childers is coming to Nigeria

tiredoflife:
Yeah like I would love to Bleep ur ass
It's my opinion
Would u let me live and let live
The issue u politically correct people dont understand is that homosexuality is an attack on the core of the society which is the family
Once the family is messed up
The society is

The Nigerian family Setting has been messed up a long time ago, in fact, it wasn't ok to begin with.
What with polygamy, adultery, paternity fraud, age and academic background falsification, and so many other vices.
Bobrisky is just a result of centuries of rot in the family setting in Nigeria.

Brendaniel:
you might be wrong about following a child's feelings...

A child's best interests should be part of the consideration when two parents are splitting up. Its part of the video.

I've watched the video. I'll just say, parents should consider their children's feelings and future when splitting up. He's human like us, also hustling like us, let's stop judging.