₦airaland Forum

uthlaw:
instead of looking elsewhere,Bleep the both of them!

That's nonsense of what essence is it for

Loverboy3333:
So a friend of mine traveled out 3 months ago, he has been worried if his Gf is or will be cheating while he is outside the country,

He gave me her number and ask me to test her if she will agree for me

I am confused now, dont want to be a barrier to their relationship

Pls don't do that for him, it's a selfish way of thinking from him

If he has trust issues, let him deal with it

A woman with ring gets tempted talk less of ringless fingers
Just respect yourself and tell him to use another person

OlayemiAshraf:
Should a man ask for money from his girlfriend or wife

I actually ask for money from my girlfriend with my chest out and I don't feel ashamed... Even when I don't have money for meal , she pay for it without even abusing me ... When she needs money and I have , I don't excitate to give her ... Actually we elevate by helping each other .....

I've been hearing from some women saying that "" a man that ask for money from his girlfriend is a red flag "" nairalanders is that true

Lalasticlala Mynd44 Seun Dominique Cao

Life is give and take

There is nothing wrong in asking of money from your wife or girlfriend, in as much as your are not in a habitual demand

Women gives to a man fir a purpose unlike men that gives without reservations


When a woman is assisting you financially, she is expecting you to respect yourself, once you Bleep up, she will give you full details and date of the money you collected from her

omolola100:
My mother advice me never to look for a rich man who is well do whenever i'm set to get married.
she said i should marry a man that we will both start our life from the foundation, according to my mum, she said it is better to suffer with man to acquire wealth, than to go for a ready made soup.

Looking at the way things are going now, do you think a woman will now stoop so low and marry a poor man that is trying to make ends meet? Although, money is not love, but why would a parent wish her daughter to marry a poor man, i am begining to see my mum as a bad mother who does'nt wish me well.
Is it advisable i follow my mothers advice? I should stay in SURULERE instead of OLORUNSOGO.

Your mother gave you an advice that will make you have respect and personality in your future marriage, but you are too premature to understand that aspect

If you marry a beginner, you will be able to till the soil together with him and when the blessings come, you are already a builder with him

But if you wish it must be a rich man, you never can tell which woman was behind him while he was struggling to become rich and so, you will be a stranger to his wealth and that means, you are can't take charge because he has already made his fortune
Follow your mother advice pls

It's time womem should stop waiting for ready made men, most ready made men hit to their pinnacle through the help of one invisible female and you know such men hardly path with such women even when they are married

MarriageIsScam:
Why a second Marriage is not necessary for a man

If you've been married before and it didn't work out, why do you want to tie yourself up in knots and trouble again ??

If it is sex you need, why don't you patiently look for an Ashi who does regular STD tests and visit her whenever the urge comes but make sure you use protection.

An Ashawo is cheaper financially and emotionally than a wife as she will not give you any stress like a wife will, she will satisfy you on the bed like a wife can't and you are not under any obligation to see her a second time and as such you are free from the troubles and drama that a wife gives a man than WILL shorten a mans life.

Reason and ponder on the above especially men who had been married once before.

DON'T DO IT A SECOND TIME. SEX YOU CAN GET WITHOUT MARRYING A WOMAN THAT WILL FRUSTRATE AND SHORTEN YOUR LIFE.

Who did this to you ⁉️

riverbird:
I have this girl that I have been dating for 4 years now but we never had sex until early this year, one thing I noticed was that's anytime we have sexx I always have things working fine for me and I don't really understand what is really the thing with her, the recent one was early this week after like a day we made out I won all my bets

So your luck is tied to bet, I was thinking that you are talking about luck from place of work like promotion and good report

WailingGraduate:
Imagine what the government is making a graduate with a strong Second Class Upper from a reputable Federal University in Nigeria do.

Due to a no 6-digit paying job (because of widespread Nepotism), I get to rent a one-room apartment where we share a pit toilet and a dilapidated bathroom

Am sure you saw all these before paying rent

Just manage and stay there while making plans for another better apartment

They will all become history one day

KingintheNorth:
Would you rather have your partner confess that they cheated on you or keep it to themselves?

If any one wants to cheat, cheat and keep it secret

Nothing hurts as you, getting to know that your partner cheats

Daniwes:
Met two sisters a while ago in church, for some reason, the older one got my no and has been calling me almost every day. Meanwhile, I ve always wanted the younger one-she is my full spec for a serious relationship, I just did not get a chance to bond and get her contact.

Recently, the older one tried a few more advances which I turned down. I ve planned to clear her straight that I am not interested, but I am not sure how to go about it as of course these are siblings. I really like younger sis, but I feel I am not sure how to proceed with this.

I feel the recent move older sis pulled will sabotage any meaningful relationship I want to have with the younger sis in future

For the fact that the senior gave you a light and you are ignoring it, is enough fear for you not to go for the junior

Woman never do you something before
Just look else where and leave both of them alone

halogate:
Lol..so u noticed as well. The brooding/wailing too much. Very pitiful. Seems it's his first time
I hope he learns

Him never see anything

Men have seen worst than this, same thing is applicable with women

Saddestmann:
Am In So Much Pains Right Now My Heart Is Shattered Beyond Repair, I Just Don't Have Interest In Anything Anymore..

Oh God I Can’t Believe How The Mighty Has Fallen.
I Saw Everything But Still Couldn’t Walk Out With My Sanity Intact Until I Got Broken

I Sit Down Everyday Watching My World Coming Down Helplessly

Oh God What An Hypocrite I Am, I Give People Good Advices But Still Couldn’t Safe Myself

Oh My Heart Is Heavy

I Need Healing.
Someone Please Help Me Am Going Crazy, Oh Lord How Does This Kept Happening To Me

Am Weak And Have No Strength To Do Anything.

Have Always Believed In Relationship Freedom And Treating My Partners As My Priority...

Oh How The Mighty Has Fallen Truly, O Ma Se O Na Me Somebody Do Like This..

I Gave You The Whole Of Me But You Sh*t In My Face Why Babe..

Am Trying So Hard To Move On But Just Don’t Have My Strength.
I Told You How Others Had Treated Me In The Past And You Promised Me You Won’t Be Like Them.

You Broke Whatever Is Left Of Me Babe Why This Pains Is Too Much.

I Wasn’t A Weak Man( I Tolerated You And Gave You Enough Space To Be Yourself) I Guess You Showed Me Fake Love For So Long And It All Looked Real..

Please People Whoever You Decide To Settle Down Your Life With Please Always Check Their Phones And Always Ask Questions When Something Is Not Right.. At Least You Can Safe Yourself The Heart Ache Am Feeling Right Now Cause No Matter How Long You Ignore Like Nothing Is Going On, It Will Still Come Out To Light Someday And By Then You Might Be Too Deep And Unreturnable(if there’s anything like that)

Oh God I Will Never Forget You After Everything
I Don’t Really Fault You For Tearing Me Apart I Fault Myself, I Made The Biggest Mistakes Of My Life The Days I Took You Back And Forgive You
I Regret The Two Times You Messed Up And I Forgave You And Took You Back Just Because You Told Me You Are A Change Person. And I Remembered Telling You.. When Someone Hurts You The First Time And They Begged You And You Heard They’re Plead, You Are Giving Them The Liberty To Hurt You Again Cause They Know They Will Beg You And You Will Accept. Again And Again And The Circle Goes On.

I Also Remembered I Told You No One Really Changed They Just Do Their Sh*t More Discreetly And Away From Your Eyes..

I Insisted Am Never Taking You Back But Your Mom Called And Started Pleading With Me That She Will See After You Becoming A Better Person And It Will Never Repeat Itself..

I Saw The Handwriting On Sky So Clear For All To See Still I Choosed To Give You Another Chance And See Where I Am Now

I Even Wrote On My Phone Diary That If I Ever Accepts You Back I Will Regret, Guess What It Happening And I Can’t Help Myself. Can’t Sleep Nor Do Anything You Occupied Everywhere In My Heart Can’t Even Breathe..

Oh God How Did I BecomeThis Stupid..
Below Is A Note A Made On April 13 2020, How I Reengaged Against The Note Is Still A Mystery To Me With My Eyes Widely Opened..

You Claimed I Got Trust Issues And I Told People Like You Made Me That Cause Of Some Bad Relationships..

Brothers Truly Women Don’t Deserve Civil And Nice Guys.. They Always Take Them For Granted..



Cc:farano
Cc:lalasticlala
Cc:Seun
Cc:Rocknation

Mr Sadman, your moniker has made things that pertains love to be very complex for you

Heart breaks are like carry overs, you have to prepare for it as it will definitely come so far relationships are concerned

You have to move on, else you poison yourself

You are just experiencing life and its meant to teach you a lesson

Carchoice:
You must be joking. You think you are the first to go through this? Move on jare. There’s no space on front page to accommodate your sadness Mr sadman.

I think he is the one doing himself
Just look at the way he is brooding like shekau of boko haram that miss his target, nonsense, they will still break his heart again and again

Tjra:
LONG STORY ALERT!!!


Good afternoon Nairaland.

God has been so good to my family this year and a particular blessing has been giving us sleepless night.

I work with a big organisation here in Lagos and currently earn about N600k. I used to work in the branch since my entry level days 6 years ago until I was able to runz the head office movement.

Ever since I join the HQ two years, my life has been at ease. No weekend duties, no sickening pressures from customers. I have been able to develop my self, complete the professional courses I abandoned and can rest well on weekends/public holidays.

The worklife balance now isn't only the advantage of working at the HQ. The career progression and rapid promotion crowns it all.

My spouse earns a little above N400k and we manage ourselves well. Our combined income isn't that much but we've been able to achieve a lot due to our mutual cooperation. She commits her resources 100% into our home. Some people see me as a "big man" outside, no knowing I am actually enjoying the reward of marrying a good wife.

My wife recently got a job very lucrative job. Salary is about N1.5M monthly. She was on the process for close to a year. You can imagine our joy when she was eventually given an offer. This job is a huge one for us as a family and will make life more sweet.

My pain now is the job is based at Abuja and that means she has to relocate there with our kids. Abuja is not where I can drive to considering the security situation of Nigeria. Also, it won't be wise to fly down every week (I also have hidden phobia for heights ) because of costs and other attendant risks.

I actually want us to live together as a family most especially because of our kids. Some Kids tend to be spoilt when raised almost alone their mothers. As a father, I want to jointly raise them with their mother and also instill discipline in them appropriately.

The only solution on sight is to ask my company for redeployment to a branch at Abuja. This I fear might return me back to "Egypt". I.e days of stunted growth, no promotions. In summary, I am scared of killing my career by myself.

My wife is okay with us visiting each other every month but I am vehemently against it.

Someone please help

Congratulations for the upgrade of the family

Pls let your wife move to Abuja while you stay in Lagos because working in Lagos gives you all the time you need and weekend freedom

For every upgrade or promotion comes with greater challenges


If you know you can cope with the children, stay with them while she works, makes more money and you guys can develop things that you can do within this period since she commits her salary faithfully

Her new job may not give her the chance to run home affairs but the money will keep coming

She can be visiting you guys once in two weeks and when you are on leave, fix it during school holidays and travel with the children to spend it with her

Life itself comes with risk and challenges
Good Luck

Baawaa:
They suppose to hold service no matter how,i believe he has assistant pastors

All of them are in shock

These birds are very sensitive at this stage, only an experienced poultry attendants can handle them

mathskid:
For the over years now, despite all efforts put by fathers to train up their children, by attending to all their basic needs as fathers, after becoming successful in adulthood, children always tend to do great things for their mothers than that of their fathers. Even me is a victim as well, I want do great things for my mum but I remember my dad did all he could for me, make sure that I don't become a miscreant in the society by making sure I was discipline enough but still yet I love my mum more than him.
Why is it like that? Or is it written in the Bible to favour your mother than your father when you are fully mature?




Pls push to front page, let's know our mistakes as fathers in our children's life

Nature already bonded children and mothers right from pregnancy so it continues that way

Yes, fathers are doing good to provide for their children especially the responsible ones and they get the required respects from their children

But you see those acclaimed fathers that doesn't want to be responsible and left the suffering for their mothers alone, those children will grow up loving their mother more than their father

Newguy999:
I am a guy, currently 22 years of age. For some time in the past I usually have occasional chest pains which comes and goes within 10 minutes. I thought it was as a result of my sugar intake as I consume soft drinks a lot with little or no exercises so I decided to cut down on my soft drink to no avail because I always end up going back to it.

Fast forward to sometime last month, I traveled to Europe to get a medical degree and when I got here, I started living on junk foods, KFC and McDonald’s as I could not cook. The chest pain came back one night and I decided to complain to my dad. Immediately I complained to him, I became conscious of it and I started fussing over it.

I went to google and everything I saw about pains in the chest always leads to cardiac arrest, stroke and dying. I couldn’t stop thinking about it, I was always trying to check my heartbeat every chance I get. My dad said it was due to the junk foods so I stopped junk foods and soft drinks as my cholesterol could be high. I still couldn’t shake off the horrible feeling I got whenever I checked my heartbeat.

I started having panic attacks and difficulties with breathing and always feeling tired. I eventually went for check up and my heartbeat showed a beat of 68 bpm. I got checked by a cardiologist, neurologist and an orthopedic doctor and they all said my vitals looked normal, blood pressure normal, blood oxygen level normal, blood sugar normal except for the orthopedic doctor who told me I had to fix my slouching posture.

It’s been a week after the check up but my life isn’t back to normal. I can’t keep complaining to my parents because I gave them quite a scare with my first complaint and I know they have their own life to live but I’m just scared, I live alone in my apartment here and I’m new so no friends yet.

Anytime I check my heartbeat it still feels irregular,I can’t enjoy the foods I use to love, I get scared of doing strenuous exercises like jogging because I’ve heard stories of people who collapsed while jogging, i don’t enjoy my sleep anymore as I read that most people with cardiac problems die in their sleep.

For a week now, I have been going for evening walks to keep fit and exercise and I only eat once a day. I eat 2 apples every day and I swallow a capsule of omega 3 fatty oil daily. The only protein I consume now is salmon or mackerel fish because of their heart strengthening capabilities.

I can’t focus on my studies anymore but I can’t complain because I don’t want to bother my parents anymore but I’m scared. Some nights I wake up with panic attacks and every morning I feel happy for sleeping and waking up successfully. I hate how flawed the human design is. Sometimes I get distracted but as soon as I feel any slight discomfort in my chest, I check my heartbeat and it feels irregular. There’s occasional sharp pains in my head that goes almost immediately and sometimes I feel blood throbbing through my veins in different parts of my body. Tomorrow I’ll be going out to get an apple series 6 watch so I can monitor my vitals better.

Sorry for the long read, I just had to let all of this out.

I think you need to do HPilory test, you could he having ulcer attack
You can take omiorazole and liquid antacids to calm it down for like three days

Ulcer does the same similar thing

DenreleDave:
Yes.. But the Alhaji is the main culprit... He sold the goods but na money ẹ no free release

How are we sure they are all not partners in crime

JFiveX:
Since last month I started Having a Feeling like bugs are crawling underneath my face , without any physical appearance mostly when i wash my face and at night ,

Please what could be the cause ?

It could be warm but definitely an infection

ObamaMessi:
I had this woman who we lived in thesame compound, she's Tiv by tribe. She was at her late 20s. She was always fond of me and asks of me in my absence. I never thought she was feeling something for me. Sometimes she looks straight into my eyes and make her looks softer. Her looks on me shows deep affection.This
woman bought me recharge card on my birthday, and always give me food to eat.Whatever i ask her she strive to get it for me.
To cut the long story short, she always touch me and call me to her room and just be looking at me.She shew different signs until she lurred me to hug her. She was soft and good for romance, but i never did.
The second woman was older by far, i think around 40s.Tho she did her's in a more matured way. This woman always ask who my girlfriend is. She love sitting beside me but never made eye contacts or touches. One sunday while everybody have gone to church, she cooked and fetched my own share for me. I was in the room and this woman, without knocking, forced in.

If you have got what they want give it to them

UYEMDO35:
What do you think can make a girl feel sad after sex? I really can't figure out.... According to my friend he was like after having sex with his suppose girlfriend for the first time. The girl became sad... He tried persuading her... But the girl refuse to talk.. So he had to open up to the girl that.... It was his first time of having sex in his entire life... The girl was like..... Chai...I don Bleep-up..(putting her two hands on her head).
......... She angrily left and promise to call but ever since then the girl didn't call neither did her line went through..
And he is ashame to approach her...
Please advice needed.....

Probably she didn't have orgasm and being that the guy is a first timer, she us already use to guys that knows how to do it right

sofiscatedmoron:

At whay age should a man stop bleeping his wife?
Any idea?

A man will continue to bleep his wife until he becomes extremely weak down there

prezidob:
I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 2 years now. Honestly he's such a sweet guy and every lady's dream man. We're both course mates in the same university. We love each other and have pledged to get married after graduation. I'm a very beautiful lady as there's no day gone by without a toaster. Because of financial difficulties, I took a job in a club as a waitress and recently, secretary to my boss... combining both work. I go to meeting with my boss to plan for the organisation of the club and I do come late and sometimes I sleep over.
My boyfriend reprimanded me for late nights and I told him that he's not my father and should not try to control me. He is so jealous!!
But the truth is he doesn't hide anything from me. Throughout the lockdown he was there for me.
I don't like the work but it's the only way to get by since my parents are not helping and my boyfriend is a student too.

How do I convince him that I love him and I will not cheat on him?

He doesn't want me to do the work neither do I. But we can't help it.

Please your opinion matters a lot to me as it will help me manage my situation. I don't want to lose him.

Working in a club house, is not a job for decent and responsible people

Your case is like telling a doctor that you are a virgin but you are already attending antenatal clinic

You two options, it's either yu quit the club job for the sake of your guy or you ignore him and continue to be your boss PA

Your boss too will definitely be mad to see any guy around you

But you know what, that job may lead you to loose this guy and you may regret it at the end

So many things are going on in his mind over your activities there, no matter how innocent you want to be

You and I knows that such working environment is not a good image

The truth is that she was scammed by the guy using Alaji as a front

Getting the guy may not be easy as she thinks

Let her keep playing along with the guy until she can find his location in Ibadan then use the Army in Ibadan to arrest him

spector15:
Good morning house,please what should an employee do if your boss insults you on a work WhatsApp group� for a brief misunderstanding .thank you very much.please i need a professional opinion���

Does working for someone give them the license to insult you in Nigeria over a basic error

Understand that he is your Boss and some of them can talk to you anyhow and you are expected to remain quiet and accept it without returning the insult back

But the best way to go is, you have to stop being forward, mind your business and avoid any kind of error that will lead to open disgrace.

slimman007:
Babe, l love you dearly on this your statement.How I wish every female out there will get this into their skull.

Lol, some ladies dont understand that's why they are not getting it right

Felililicia:
This is somebody, I just accepted a month ago,
I barely know him though we met twice during the relationship. During the third one( yesterday) now he is hinting for sex, the way I replied him made him change topic and said he was joking.
Anytime we meet his joystick get visibly aroused. I need a serious man. Should I dump him.
Earlier thread
https://www.nairaland.com/6576284/did-rush-accept-guy-hope

What else does a man needs from a woman the moment you accept a relationship from him

Of course is sex, men see sex as a game and women sees sex as something not so necessary


If you wish to give him go ahead and if you don't wish just draw the line and make sure you don't ask him of any financial favour

Stewart883:
African mentality!!! For your information, anyone can get married either rich or poor. Being successful has to do with your achievement and milestones made in your life not having a job or getting married.

See let me break it down. Do u know we have alot of poor pensioners here in Nigeria who when young had a job and a happy family (wife and children)?? So what happened?? You tell me

Nigeria mentality, you didn't read my post very well because if you did, it has nothing to do with a pensioner

Enehdebby:
Can we actually say that a poor Man is successful and what do you mean when you say that someone is successful in life?

A man is successful if he is married and can afford three square meal a day, a house built by himself and his family are living there has a job that gives him steady income and is happily living with his wife and children

crackhaus:
All of those steps can be skipped – a woman can simply move in with a man she loves, live in harmony with him and raise kids together.

This is the modern way to do things, and I believe that modernists & feminists will agree with me on this.

Even a woman who is desperate for marriage can't just move in just like that without and formalities or celebration

It must be done or when she dies, it must be done before burial

simplejayy:
When a wife tells her husband " I purposely distance myself from your family"

What is she saying?

I returned from work last night and heard this Bros in the compound having heated argument with his wife.

He replied "You dey distance yourself abi.. E mean say u fit poison me"

What has distance and poison got in relation?

Experienced men and women over to you

There must be some unresolved issues between him, the wife and his family

So for the fact that the man is not fighting for her or protecting her before his family, she has decided to distance her self from the family

That doesn't mean she will poison the man

But he will be the recipient of the whole wahala

Eberex:
There is this guy, I'll call him Peter, who is dating a girl for seven months and plan on marrying her. He has done the Knocking and was known by the girl's family.

But what he wanted was for the girl to get pregnant before he go ahead with the traditional marriage rite. On the other side this guy has a side chick who he still make out time to see. As days go by, the side chick called to tell him she is pregnant. The guy went home and told his to-be-wife to leave his house. But didn't tell her what really happened or why he is asking her to leave.

The girl returned to her father's house, meanwhile she was pregnant but didn't know. Her family accepted her back, at least the guy hadn't done anything on her head.

The side chick moved in and when it was time for her to give birth, there was complications and she didn't survive it but the baby did.

After some few weeks a guy showed up and told him the child belong to him and that the mother was his girl friend, but Peter told him to go to hell. The guy insisted which prompted a DNA test. The result shower that the baby was in fact his. Peter was dumbfounded.

He went back to his first girl (whose pregnancy is almost due now) to beg her but she declined. The father told him to forget having his daughter back. The child would be raised by the family.

What do you think guys?

Is she wants to accept him and reunite with the man, it's her choice, but I bet you that she will make sure she pays the guy back

The way and manner he will do that is what I can't say