₦airaland Forum

bendaniel1616:
Good morning my people, since I became friends with my close friend wife , we do chat gist , after my relocation I've been have strange dreams with her that we are making love as husband and wife , sleeping on the same bed with her , the dreams is about 3 to 4 times now , not what I put on my mind at all , the first one I cum on my body in real life , and all the dreams look so real until I'm up , what's your advice on this pls family .

I think the more you chat with a woman In a friendly way the more you are getting use to the woman and may start having feelings

It can happen in consciously and the next this is sex that's the only thing that can crown all the gist and fun chat

If you know within you that you are lusting for her, even for once then calm yourself down over it and start driving that feelings away

But if you know that you are not lusting for her and you dint have any love feelings for her, then reduce your chat to just normal chat ans no pet names or sweet words will be type

Limit your frequency on chats or call so that you can drive that dream away

That's if you are really serious with your complain and wants to stop nonsense

If you can't help it then one day you may go down there

saysoo:
Familiarity breeds boredom. If we Africans can imbibe the values of divorce and seperation,not see it as evil or bad but as a means of happiness. We will start having a better society. First e must have a fairly good economy so that dependency will reduce. Am married for 14+yrs ane feels same at times, never seen another woman/man panty.

For 14yrs you have been faithful and your partner is doing well in supporting you

There is no way your love won't get renewed every morning simply because you didn't test what is outside

Kudos to you

EriMma1:
Hmmm... True!

Lol 😂

emmyluizzz:
Thanks

You are welcome

EriMma1:
I've been observing this for some time now. Once a couple has lived together for ten years,
the closeness between them reduces. As in.. the man no longer sits with the wife to gist or even play. Meanwhile, you'll still see the woman trying to bond and wanting her man to always be around her.

I noticed this in one couple. In fact they are pastor and Mrs. The woman always follows the man every where and wants to sit where he's sitting but the man would clearly avoid her and go out of sight completely when the tailing becomes too much and only come back when the woman is no longer in sight. Why?

No man born of a woman will try such with me, I'll blank you like you're not there.

Women, you too should wise up and stop making yourselves too available. Make yourself a bit scarce and they'll value you.

Any couple you find in this categories are actually living as flat mates and not husband and wife

Though men wants to taste what other women have out there and once they get it especially the ones that are ready to give him hot hot, the one at home becomes less relevant to him

While she is still faithful and looking forward to being with him and Stay close to him at home, he is busy avoiding her because he got a big fish outside

By the time she discovers that he is not giving her the attention she wants, she will face her directions towards the children who will never ignore her and find solace in them

By the time the man is getting old, he starts coming close to the wife, meanwhile she is already done with him but still living with him

That's when the man will become lonely while he is married to his wife

You can only harvest what you sow that's what this life will offer you

advanceDNA:
Are u women allergic to making ur own money? Any small thing.. will say you have no choice but to cheat, go into prostitution etc.

.the way out almost always involve spreading legs for men(tagging it no choice)

You have quickly condemned her for going extra miles to feed a foolish man's children while he is still alive

Why not crucify him for starving his family yet rock his world to the detriment of his family

What makes you different from him

Dainy1:
This dude was missbehaving and not providing for his family, accordingly to the wife, some days, they goes hungry why the guy spend time outside not minding what's happening at home to the kids. So, instead of sourcing a means to survive, the woman decided to have a sugar daddy who is now providing for her and her kids.
The man is heartbroken and threatening to kill the sugar daddy.

Is there any reason to justify a woman cheating in marriage?
Is the sugar daddy the main target here?
What will you advise in this situation?

In as much as I dont support what she is doing, I can't judge her because the story said that her husband doesn't provide for them but rocks out, they go hungry some days but am sure he eats while his family goes hungry

So she has no option left but to have a sugar daddy who cares for them and provide for them to feed

Well if the husband can't stand it, let him find his way out of the relationship

Hunger is not something to play with

A man who doesn't do his work, another man will do it for him

emmyluizzz:
I will be traveling to Lagos for the second time in my life but this time around I will be base there(live). the first time was just a 4days visit and I was indoors throughout

This is a decision I want to make since my stay in Owerri is not yielding any good results. I have made good savings and I want to use it to hustle in Lagos



NB. Accommodation is not a problem since I have a place already to stay for free


I need advice on the do's and don'ts

You are welcome to Lagos
A land with many opportunities

A place that will seat you up if you are slow

A place that you can choose to be usefull or useless

Lagos is not bad and yes bad people are every where

Just be wise and smart because it's a place where they will steal your phone and the ear piece will still be singing on your ear

Sxyhalima:
im dating a guy and his mother wanted to go to the priest with her son for the priest to pray over the relationship to see if it is the will of God. my boyfriend initially agreed, but when i said i diddn't feel comfortable with the situation he backed out and his mother was very unhappy with him about it.

my boyfriend insists that his mother likes me, and the prayers were just for confirmation, but i am not sure. we've been dating for about 8 months and i've suggested that i meet her this month, to clear my doubts but he says it is too soon and we should wait until late july.

should i be worried?

im in my late 20s he is in his early 30s

Why should you be worried about his mum taking him to a priest for prayer

Forget it, if God has picked you for him,
You will find favour aby where your name is mentioned on his matter

Unless you have something that you are hiding which they will find out and such can spoil show for you

Makophils:
I broke up with my girlfriend of 6 months because she asked me when was the last time I gave her money to make her hair and nails.I yelled at her when she popped the question out of the blues and things escalated quickly from there which eventually lead to our breakup. I've never been a stingy boyfriend. I have always provided for her to the best of my abilities and whenever she asked even though I must admit that she wasn't materialistic.

I lost my job last year december when my company downsized but I was fairly compensated . Since then,my ex only visited me once despite staying in the same city with me. Knowing fully well that I had no job but still going ahead to ask that insensitive question really made me angry. Earlier this year,I gave her money when she was returning to school. I also gave her money during her birthday. After we had the argument,I still went back to apologize to her but insisted that she is no longer interested.

So,I just wanted to confirm from you guys,Did I overreact when she asked that question ? Did this girl even loved me in the first place ?

I think she is a fair weather friend

What do you expect a student to reason with your unemployed status after loosing your former job

Its time you guys should understand that, the position or status some people are, have not given them the experience to understand what it means to bear with a man especially when he lost his job or when he doesn't have money at that moment

You can have a working class girl, she will understand and if possible support you
But not a student who needs money to keep her going

I don't normally blame the students because they have no experience to understand that the economy is not smiling especially on men

She has displayed that she is a fair weather friend, free her let her go and search for who will attend to her needs
You can't attend to her needs any longer because you are still finding your bearing

I can't blame her because I don't know her conditionds

Girlee:
[I'm pained!
I just want to know "how people run away from home".
I know I've got nowhere to go to and no one to run to but all I can think of right now is how I must leave this house, the negative vibes, the toxicity and hate.

My dad bought so many bags of cement, trips of sand to build his house. How much did I ask for?

I can't do what my mates are doing in the street because I just can't. If not, I just might have been one of those underaged prostitutes or thieves.
God has so much helped me because I've thought of so many crazy things to do but Christ in me won't allow it.

I want to be free abeg!
How do I run away from home?😩

You have not asked yourself if you finally gain admission, who will train you in the university, feeding and test books

Look if you have any where that you know that if you run to, you are better off there

Do yourself a favour and run to that place

There is no need asking your to stay when you are not happy staying there

Lexzeey:
Lol, alright, lemme get one first before thinking of zombifying her.

Good start

Lexzeey:
Lol have you seen the current generation of girls? They feel they know everything and trying to alter Thier behavior is equal to trying to manipulate and cage them, I no get the strength abeg

Lol
Keep searching, get one and modify that one

It may take time but it will worth it

sylve11:
The only sensible post I have read on this thread.

Op, you have to stop it.

Exactly 👌

ebuka10box:
thanks

You are welcome dear

ebuka10box:
Since 2021 I lost both parents,life has been good and it's also been bad. I've been the head of my family and tried every way I can in carrying my younger ones along,I've been wasteful no doubt but I've also tried the best I can in making my younger ones happy and providing their basic needs.
My younger brother lives life so carefree, he wakes up in the morning,play songs ,watches TV, eat and do nothing all day . I also have a strong feeling he has been rusticated from the university but I know he isn't a cultist but he isn't serious with academics. I've spoken to him and had quarrels countless number of times with the way he lives his life . Recently I almost beat him to pulp cause he said I'm not doing anything for them despite all I've been doing,I felt so bad . This is some1 I always tell when I get paid ,they are the first set of persons I send money whenever I get paid, nothing hurt me this year than those words.
My younger sister supports him ,they keep malice with me . It's been up to 2 weeks I went back to my place of work none has called me ,they never tell me things that happen at home while I'm away ,they even sell some properties at home. I've tried my best in carrying my younger ones along ,I recently included my bro as next of kin to my parents properties so I'll be fair to them but I've been paid back with lot of hate and im ready to play the game right now. I've complained to my mum's colleague and dad's but they pleaded with me not to abandon them . Right now I'm bent on abandoning them ,I wanna focus on my life ,my elder sister and my little nephew...these are the ones that make me happy for now ... What do I do

You know what, both of them have ganged up against you

So give them time, they will soon gang up against themselves

Meanwhile focus on the ones on your side and try your best to establish them

Dont allow any of your siblings set you back by allowing them to determine your happiness and peace

Anyone that is not loyal to you is a potential enemy to you

Be wise and be serious with your development, if you fail non of them can raise you up

So build up yourself

Lexzeey:
That's alot of work o, I'm not going to be responsible for training someone's daughter, training children to behave the way you want is hard enough, you wan come train adult, which power I get?

Training a woman to suit you as a man is not difficult, the most important thing is for her to love you and respect you

Once a man can get a desire respect from his woman, you can go tailor her to your taste

Fryx:
At least, I was able to know how much I can depend on them.

I love knowledge, and just do anything that can make me know more about anything. I am not looking for relationship, so I don’t really mind if they know or not. I just value knowledge.

By now too, I already know to just focus on myself instead of trusting a woman or depending on one for anything. Nobody taught me, I know because I took my time to learn.

Well, my advice may be off. I am not encouraging anyone to follow, it’s just something I am reflecting on. And it is not something that I will continue doing either because I don’t have any reason to anymore. Like you say, women don’t even know why they do what they did. So, it’s useless hoping on them.

It depends on what a man is hoping on in a woman

If it's useless for a man to hope on a woman, why are men still looking for women to hang on with

If you claim that you love knowledge, then upgrade your educational levels to become a lecturer where you can impact knowledge on the younger ones in school

Fryx:
Genuinely throw yourself into confusion and make her confused that your own confusion is more than hers.

She will get worried that you don’t know what you want and make the efforts to be logical.

Once she is in that stage, strike up a meaningful conversation, and you will know her for real.

It’s always work for me. Try it.

Note Please: I’m not saying you should understand women to please them. But if you are like me that like knowing the strength and weakness of those close to me so that I can know the extent to which I can trust them. I believe understanding your women will be beneficial. So that you won’t be among the gang of “fear women” after they don show you shege wey you know understand.

To be fore-warned is to be fore-harmed.

I can see that you are using reverse psychology on women

You think you are smarter

She already knows what you are doing

Dey play

Leave other men to follow their women the best way they can

What works for you may not work for another man

Women can't even understand why they do what they do
Talk less of a man trying to understand whom God created with just one rib

Lexzeey:
I am a hardworking guy, I hustle 24/7, I have no social life, few physical friends, some social media friends, I'm intelligent and I'm attracted to intelligent girls too, it's something I find attractive, and I love traveling alot, especially with a romantic partner, I want someone I can hold a meaningful conversation with that won't resort to dumb and monosyllabic responses, I don't think it's too much to ask for a girl that fits this description, my plan was to settle down in my 20s, but I'm almost 30 and unlucky with love, I've tried so many desperate things like messaging so many girls on fb, most of them don't reply, tried dating apps same news, tried setting for less, same stuff, now all I want is something serious, someone to eventually settle down with and I feel the best time to start dating her is now before I clock 30, please I am open to suggestions, what tactics do I need to employ to get a serious girlfriend quickly, all my life I've only dated twice and it's so depressing seeing people with Thier partners and I'm some lonely guy who only cares about work and video games.

I think your expectations are too high for the ones you cane across

The most important thing you should be looking for is a woman who will give you peace

Who have a good sense of direction

When you find one train her to the level of intelligence that you want

It doesn't necessarily mean her going back to school

You can train her through daily communication and accessment with her

Expose her to the kind of knowledge that you want

If you are not ready to do the above then be ready to keep searching

Blackazuma99:
Good day to everyone in this forum, please I am in desperate need of your advice.

Early 2014 she lost her dad, 2016 she lost her only brother (my uncle) and then the worst happened in 2021,i lost my father which is her husband, and since then God has been faithful, I graduated same year, my elder sister got a good job same year, we got our first family house same with other benefits.

But the problem has been my mum, she's always depressed and always thinking, thinking of my late dad, we have tried our best as the children to make her happy, especially me the first son. Please i need advice on what to do, I really don't want my mother to die of depression 😞.

You guys have tried by making her to be happy yet she is depressed

Have you ever talked to her,
to get a friend that will keep her company
A sort of a companion

If you haven't, you need to have a pep talk with her

Loneliness is one of the problems she is facing

She need a companion, let's start from that

nlfpmod:
https://thenationonlineng.net/reactions-as-customs-plans-to-ban-second-hand-clothes/

Talk is cheap
Implementation is the hardest

Okrika have been generating Revenue and no one has ever died from wearing Okrika

Even the man making this report or speech, his children are wearing Okrika bought buy his wife from the money he gave them for clothings

Okrika has come to stay and worst case scenario people will keep smuggling it into the country and still settle the customs

If this man is at the border post, he will not make this statement

Tokunbo cars were Barned, yet this same people are still buying Tokunbo cars because it's cheaper that brand new care and more affordable

May his wish not come true for Okrika head

SultanOfAbia:
They should ban that nonesense
How can you be wearing another person used clith. Do you know where they picked those clothes from?
Do you know what if the owner of the clothes has died and they sell the clothes to you and you buy.
Comot money buy original clothes
Or you wear traditional cloths

Wearing another person's used clothe is a no no from me.
That is how on of my guy bought okirika jeans and while washing it he saw blood stain inside the jeans.
He tried returning it but it didn't work
Do you know if the owner of that Jean was a victim that got shot and his jeans removed and sold as okirika second hand cloth and you gladly buy it and wear a dead man clothes walking around.
And you wonder why evil things are happening to you.

The one that shocked me till this day
I found out that girls buy okirika bra and pants.
Thunder fire all of una. Bloody disgusting species. Tueh!!!
Imagine wearing the used pant of an unknown bleeding vagina.
Angel Gabriel, what are you waiting for?

The fact that you were born and raised with Okrika clothes should be one good reason you don't just open mouth and be talking carelessly

Swear that you have never bought a T-shirt or Polo from any Okrika stand

If yes or No
then the Tunder will start from your side because your mum used it in you when you were an infant

Can't you just make your own contribution without blowing hot air

Grow up pls

yungzed360:
This is my girl. Our problems are she most times receives calls and chats with lots of guys and she lies to me alot, I've told her severally to stop and always tell me as it is, although I get angry very easily bt it would be better to digest the truth than lies cus it's hurt me a lot. So I've broken up with her many times and she sometimes swear never to come back again. But after a few days or weeks. She will come begging, calling and texting again and then I keep forgiven her.

Below is a screenshots of our most recent quarrels when she came back begging and the reason for the quarrel was she was at my house when another guy called again, and she couldnt tell the guy she was at her boyfriend's house even though the guy kept asking where she went, she only said she went out.

What exactly could be the problem?
Is it me? Is it her? I'm I too over protective or feeling insecure? Please guys what should I do?

Do you nee to be told that you are not the only one in her life

Or you want us to advice you on what you know that you should do

Follow your heart it will lead you well

Spray:
Many thanks

You are welcome dear

Spray:
My seven months baby stopped taking pap and baby's food.

She prefer eating adult food but looks like adult food not enough for her.

What should we do about this? As it affecting her physical look

Or what other enticing food will you advice?

Since she prefers adult food, give her enough of it
Then for pap add Milo and don't dissolve the Milo so that she can crunch on the milo pallets as you scoop the pap with spoon into her mouth.

Give her fruits to help her in digesting the adult food

Fanparker:
Hi house I created a thread about my distant brother that beat his girlfriend.. now there are separated.. I and other people advised the girl to flee her life cuz the beating is getting much and becoming a normal thing, truth be told I advise the girl because of her life and also her family won’t take it lightly if they find out plus my distant brother don’t see to put an end to the beating because he knows if he beat her, he’ll apologize and the girl will come back but now the case is different. The girl left finally.. my brother is not accepting reality. He cries everyday, threaten to kill himself if the girl doesn’t come back and the girl to me has moved on. He keeps on calling but the girl doesn’t pick nor return messages anymore.. My distant brother is depressed that people around are asking what’s wrong with him, he no longer associate, he cries, stay to himself and it’s getting worse. The recent event that happened is he tried to call the girl, then she picked and give her phone to a guy and some other girls to mock him that don’t he get tired of the constant begging and wailing, that the girl is not intrested and moved on.. he has since been crying and it’s becoming a worrisome issue to my mother because he stay with us . What do you think I can do as a brother to him and what can my mother do to help the situation?

I think you need to take him to a psychiatrist or psychiatric hospital for evaluation

Start from there first

dondodo:
My name is Solomon from Kogi State. A graduate of Accounting from a government University in Kogi state. Since I graduated from the university 10 years ago,I've been facing different challenges ranging from family,finance,health and so on.Luckily for me i got a good job this year and I've been thinking of settling down. Do you think it is proper for me to marry a woman at 35 or just have a baby mama? This question have been pondering my mind. Please your opinion is really needed

Can you tell me the difference between the baby mama and a wife

Can you explain the benefits of having a baby mama and a wife

Can you ask yourself why, you even have the thoughts of baby mama when you can find a wife to plan with considering the fact that at age 35yrs, you are supposed to be rounding up having kids assuming you married earlier

Anyway the best for you is to go in search of a wife and have just few kids that you can train 2/3 should be OK so far you are lucky to have mix gender

Its not how far but how well

By now I believe that you already know what you want in a woman

Rtk4:
Married women crush on me almost everywhere I find myself... I've had sex with some and was able to control myself on others. But it's really getting worse. The last one was a pretty woman whose daughter school where i teach. I can't even explain how we started but we had sex last week. Since then, anytime i enter the daughter's class to teach, I feel so guilty. Please how can i handle the advances and seduction of married women? It's too much for me.

The issue is that you have had it with more than one and you find it less expensive

But now that you want to come out of it, stop putting yourself in the light of them seeing you

You could be black, handsome and attractive to them, you could even be the one that gives them a green light
so what do you do, guard yourself

Be discipline, so that you will be able to resist them

Have a girlfriend that you love and are committed with the relationship

Most things that comes free is always difficult to drop

So the problem and solutions are within you

Some men finds it easy dating married women because they give zero problems

Ok naw now if you keep on keeping them as friends, how will you now have time to have a spinster that you will marry

Well be prepared to come out of it and that means being prepared to forgo your benefits of dating them

They may not be giving you money but their must be something that comes with it

Is it the peace of mind that they don't trouble you or the fact that you service them well

Like I said, if you mean it you will stop it

dopedan:
I have some bad habits im trying to stop like porn and masturbation, because wen im with a girl I get erect but when its time to put it in it goes flaccid , it’s quite shameful
So i need advice from people who experience this on wat to do to speed up my recovery process and get my morning wood back thanks

If you concentrate on other things, you will be too busy to remember sex, even if the urge comes up

Well you must get it solved now before you become sterile that you can't person on your woman when you marry

One bigger problem with it is that your dick will get use to your palm instead of the pussy

Am sure you don't want another man to attend to your wife in that aspect

Just convince yourself to put a final stop to it and keep a girl friend that will attend to you when the need arises

ahnie:
Nsogbu adi!
Dalu sor nne.

Imela

Ebenezer2021:
Daalu ma'am.
You're like a mother to us on this forum

Dalu, Ozigo Biko