₦airaland Forum

PATO101:
Unless your wife is a stay at home , she'll definitely have male friends like co workers, church friends and other male acquaintances.

Exactly

PATO101:
Is it considered cheating for a married woman to borrow money from her male friend without her husband's knowledge?

Any circumstances or situations that will warrant a married woman to borrow money from her male friend while living with her husband, must have been beyond she and her husband

Meaning she or they did not have any option again

Am not justifying that anyway

noble2faith:
As for me,
Father ₦60k
Mother ₦40k

What of you?

I will reverse it
Mother's spend their money into the family especially feeding

Father's spends too but can't foot all the house bills

IyaebeTheGreat:
Why are marriages having a lot of issues these days? 😢

Lack of love
Lack of attention and interest
Lack of happiness in marriage
Lack of communication
Lack of respect for each other
Lack of provision and inability to provide for the family

Lastly, what people wishes in marriage doesn't come through

DrAkpamudehe:
U are the one who needs to see a physiologist abi psychologist. Bunch of entitled brats

Mugu

Schoolguy9:
Some women have this inbuilt desire to control the people around them especially the male folks and you see it happening in the society, family and within marriages.

It baffles me because women do not desire to be interefered with in issues that concern them yet you see them justling to determine what course their brothers study, what time their husbands should come back home and whose mother comes for Omugwo first!

All these things are even worse when the man is inexperienced. For crying out loud, why is it in some women's nature to control everything that concerns men?

Women have been manipulating men from the time of Adam's

Am not justifying it but it was there before you were born

Ablemed:
I know the business she'd like to do aiidy

Ok naw
Try and make her feel your impact on it

NoToPile:
Lots of Nigerians are terrible and inconsiderate neighbors know this and know peace. It's just ways to cheat others that full some people's mind.

They can use the 2,500 you load but they can't pay when it gets to their turn abi, solution is everybody contribute the 2,500 I. E 10k for all and buy 10k units. If one person does not pay it means no loading of the prepaid, you will be in darkness for some days oo but that's the only way to cure this madness.

Even at that some won't even send they still won't pay and will prefer you all to be in darkness.

Alternatively you can get your own prepaid with your money, discuss with your landlord, if he can refund you later, some do sell it to their landlords finally when packing out.


That shared prepaid meter thing has caused so much katakata in some compounds.

Nwadu:
I moved into this compound about a year ago now.
Landlord told me that in no time we would all have our individual electricity meters.

This is a year + now and we still share the meter together ( we all use one single meter)

Now the problem is we have decided to pay #2500 each every month since we are 4 occupants of the house.

The agreement allows for one person to buy #2500 worth of electric units which carries us for one week, so that the next week another person buys, until we all have bought. Making a total of #10000 per month

I have been the one complying to this agreement as the other three persons will always come with excuses as for why they cant buy units at their own turn.

Pls what are the best ways to sort This kind of issues as I have called for meetings twice and alerted the landlord too to no avail.

You have given them the impression that you need the light more than them, so they are all looking upto you and will keep promising you to bear with them

Simply buy a Generator for yourself
let the whole building be in darkness and you will see them seat up

Dearlove2me:
The truth is right now, I feel like going somewhere for a while. I feel like I need rest. Somewhere I can forget about all my problems and breathe a fresh air.
My husband has not been honest with me since the beginning of this marriage and I doubt if this is an attitude of a man that loves

He has always been in debt even before I married him. and he wouldn't let me know what he do with the money he keeps borrowing from people. Even my friends I introduced to him, he is owning them and can't pay back.

The bad side is, he borrows and stop picking their calls not respond nicely to them.
He behalves badly to them.
I'm suspecting he's into some kind of addiction that demands money. Maybe gambling but he wouldn't tell me.
He's constantly on his phone.

He is owning loan app everywhere. To the extent that the app had to send hurrible messages to his contact's lists including his bosses, office colleagues and my relatives.
It's so embarrassing and tiring.
He has apologized several times that I should give him time to work on himself to stop an addiction, but he refused to explain what it is. Claiming that I might leave him if I know.
But he has not changed abit.
We are always hungry in this house. No baby food for my 6months old baby, no pampers and everything is total struggle. I quit my job last year but I'll soon start job search once my baby grow a little.
In this house, If I don't look for food, then, we starve, I don't look for means of getting pampers, food, wears,then my baby will suffer, because his daddy is not capable of providing anything for us. It's so annoying.

I have dreams before I married him, but right now, I feel lost. There's no romance, no love, no affection in this marriage anymore, as I wouldn't even let him touch me because of the stress, suffer he constantly brings on us.

Money I raised to start up a business, (340k) I ended up using it to pay for his debt last two months because the people were always coming to embarrass us in the house and neighbors were coming to pleade on our behalf. I had to clear up the loan, yet he couldn't explain what he did with the money.
With that start up capital, I would have been growing by now, but here I am. Still at the zero point.

I'm really tired
I'm so confused here.
What should I do?
What would you advise?

He has a dirty live style he is hiding from you and unless you become strict with the money with you he will never tell you

Just try and focus on that little child and as time goes on you will decide if the journey in this marriage whats the stress

You are very young to start seeing shege

Ablemed:
Sincerely speaking, After my mum, my immediate elder sister (6years older than I am) happen to be the only two beings that understands and cares so much bout me that I know in this life. My elder sister happen to be someone I don't hide anything from, tell her anything that troubles me and meet her for advice and all. I remember while growing up, she use to buy me lot of things like clothes, watches, shoes, eateries and even gift me money when necessary and as she sees fit. Many times, when I was in School (Uni)she'll atimes cook for me, send me money even when I dont ask. Inshort, she's really sacrificed alot for me while growing even till when I was doing my service. The bonding I've got with her is stronger than what I can imagine, To the point that if I don't hear from her in two days I won't feel comfortable. mehn I just love her so much.

Now the thing is, I've got so many terrible mental conditions (if you've been following my thread you'll understand) that I feel it ain't safe to start a business on my own for now. My sister on the other hand is so confident, bold and in vogue, her street credibility is top notch and a jasi lady. I'm just bout starting life after NYSC and I basically don't know what to do or where to start from. the only thing coming to my mind is to open a shop for my sister and stock it up while I figure out what to do. I forgot to mention, she's seperated from her husband for some months now and she's back to Dad's house with us. Tho she's still doing one or two to get money but I just want her to be comfortable. I need y'all take or advise on this.

Its time to reward her

Just have a talk with her and find out what business will be good for both of you

Then you can go take it up from there

Obavoh:
For the past 2 weeks my wife has been seeing strange stains in her pants.

The stains are sometimes green or yellow. She is finding it difficult to hold her urine. She wets herself a little .

She is 3 months pregnant and nursing a baby. This is her 5th pregnancy we have not experienced this type of thing before.

Our midwife gave her a doxycycline and referred us to a specialist in another town. I am waiting for end of the month salary to take her.

Please doctors in the house, is there any drug I can get frOm the pharmacy to cure her?

No herbs please

Please I really need suggestions from health experts not insults. This is a mother and unborn life we are talking about .

She only wore this pant for less than 3 hours.

You mean she is a nursing mother with three months pregnancy and the fifth pregnancy

Who knows if you have busted the placenta

Mrdealer4all:
I'm 40. Currently jobless, single, no kids, no career, no degree, and depressed. Why do I feel like I totally failed in life and that there's no hope for me?

You didn't just realize that you are not making progress

What brought you to this point of stand still

Tell us all we need to know about you

40yrs is not 40 hours

truthhurts2:
A VERY CLOSE FRIEND OF MINE. She's overdue and desperate for marriage, and she used to be unlucky when it comes to finding the right partner. She just met a guy that is of age but single, this guy is not financially bouyant but she is(self employed). Both of them are desperate to get married that within a month of their meeting this guy had introduced her to most of his family if not all. This my friend is ready to give him money for business of his choice or bring him into her business so they can both be doing it together, ready to get new apartment for both of them that in short , she's going to be the breadwinner of the family if they later end up together. Now, HER FEAR... What if she get unlucky again with him? What if this guy dupe her? Is it the right thing to do for a guy that she barely know nothing of?

NOTE... Pressure is on this lady from her family

Your advice are needed pls...

is she going to get married due to pressure or that she has found her choice of man or because her mates have married

Well if she is desperate , after marriage let her bring her business to the table for both of them to handle

But she should be the sole signature to the business account

Incase of nonsense

Salasa:
My penni's is so small, I'm 20 years old, a male virgin, ejaculates via masturbation (only when I'm so Hot and hot and can't hold it, I'm not an addict, I've high libido) occasionally and nocturnal emissions.

Only one girl has seen my unclothedness but we never had sex, sometimes, I look at other males and see thier dangling dick but mine will always look like a 5 years old. The girl that saw mine Jokingly said it too..

When my penis is flaccid, it's around two inches or more... But when I'm aroused, I measured it, it gets very big, like 6.5-7 inches and Very hard..

But if it's flaccid, it doesn't even show in the boxers, so small. I'm always ashamed to change before someone. Please is it because I'm not sexually active?

MODIFIED-- If I become sexually active, is there a chance my penis will grow? Does sex grow the penis? I want to know, thank you.

I think your size is still ok

Just go and master the act of good romance and how to make a woman get wet through romance and quickly

That alone is all you need, the size will help you finish the job

iFlare:
When we were chatting few weeks ago, I joked about being broke with a meme sticker, she then replied with a sticker that says paste aza. Then I said "my number is my Aza" (palmpay), then another sticker from her follows, which said ₦5000 sent successfully.....which I replied with a laughing emoji.

I was shocked to receive 5k alert that day, just few minutes after the chat . I thanked her and then this week again I received 15k from her😭😭😭

I'm yet to understand this.....pls what does this mean.

Note: Her family is crazy rich.....her popsy owns filling stations and so many other businesses

She's a course mate

Its a sign of love and care from her to you

Vyvyanvyvy:
Hello guys sorry to bother you again, I have a question to ask you if you can help me with answers , my ex husband sent his brother to my shop to give me 30k for our 2 children upkeep the children he hasn't bothered to cater for 3 years since our separation. The brother has also asked me for my number because my ex has something important to tell me. I told him to call him with his phone so I can talk to him which he did and my ex asked to see the children that he will be sending his brother to pick them up every 2 weeks on satursay to spend time with him and he will be bringing them back in the evening he also added he will be giving me 30k every 2 weeks saturday. He remmaried he has a son. I told him that I don't trust him with the children because of what happened when we separated he seize our daughter and I had to report him to the human rights to get her back and I don't want to go through it again. He said we should put the past behind all he wants is to have a great relationship with his children , I told him I can't release the children to him he should go to human rights or court he cut the call and I gave back the 30k to his brother to give it back to him. He left he hasn't returned back and I want to know if I was wrong for asking him to go court or human rights for visitation because I am scared he will seize them again . please advise me

You were right asking him to go to human rights to get a well approved access to his children

That's when he will be made to commit himself to the children

But I think it's best he sees them at your own choice of area not his own choice because of lack of trust

Next time he sends money pls collect it, no matter what

Unless you are not and will not be interested in receiving anything from him

youngmoore:
Good day everyone, please the advise I need on this.My marriage is 17years now with 2kids. I stop been having sex with my wife going to 6months now and I can’t continue masturbating again.I’m having issues with my business like I’m the only provider in the house while my wife has no job or side hustling.have invested set up a business for her severally with millions of money and still nothing to talk about until I have up investing.going to two years now I insisted to look for work and she refused, she always claim or waiting her family to grant her money to start fresh business while it has not been granted till date.The problem now is she is complaining of another baby without her having any income and in my own side in having serious issues in my business.she is not ready for me to use protective like she need pregnant.
I need your advise over 6months now we don’t do anything and I don’t have sex outside.she keep complaining of having another pregnant and I call her one on one, the situations on ground now in my business and if having another pregnant she will not do anything again .i need your advise I’m tired of masturbating all time and she don’t want protective sex against pregnancy.

Well she may not be the struggling type that wants to be serious with business that's why it's falling

Secondly she does want to be idle as home so pregnancy will keep her busy ans she will have enough excuses not to kill herself with hustling and bustling

Every woman is a smart one

Advice her to enroll in to teaching as so many schools are looking for teachers

But am sure she will dodge it,

Maybe she wants to be a full time house wife

That's their signs, having babies without planning and contributions

TMSMedia:
Armed Robbers Who Robbed Woman, Confess That Her In-Law Informed Them She Had Money (Photo)



https://igberetvnews.com/1440884/armed-robbers-robbed-woman-confess-law-informed-money-photo/

They actually sold themselves out with beard and dreadlocks

Spanishmilf:
Why does my hand shakes and heart beat fast? It’s becoming frustrating at this point. I read alot of threads and i saw some people suggesting propanol.

I already got it. I take one per day. I’m yet to see a total change. Has anyone experienced this and note.

Have stopped drinking sodas
Have reduced my salt
Still not helping
This happens alot when I'm gaming.

Honestly go to hospital and stop playing cheese with your life here

saweide:
Good moring everyone in the house please I need a medical advise to know if I need to see a doctor.

My name is segun I reside somewhere in lagos.
Please I need advise and no insult please.
I noticed that am too sexually active these days.

I operate a long distance relationship and anytime I visited my girlfriend for like 4 days I noticed I have sex with her moring afternoon and night and most times I go up to 45 minutes to an hour sex after the first come, I find It hard to come on second round and I go up to 45 minutes to an hour before she will cry for tiredness and it causes fight like she will tell me its OK but yet am not satisfied.

I do moring afternoon and night and even at midnight I don't allow her sleep, even my last relationships ladies complain too much of my longterm sexual drive and is giving me concern.

Tho my cucumber is not big is at medium size but if I handle a woman they always scream for help after my long sexual activity.

There was a time I went an hour marathon sex on my woman I nearly fainted that day because have exhausted all my energy.

Please should i see a doctor or there is a pill I can take? I shall appreciate you all for Good advise.

Thanks all.

Try and get a crazy sexmaniac like you, so that both of you will be very compatible

SANCTO:
I am married with 2 kids and the marriage has lasted for 13 years now. the issue is that I like sex too much but my wife often denies me sex. Anytime I bring the issue of sex, she will always give excuses ranging from tiredness and any other flimsy excuses. sex is just like a chore to my wife. I have tried all i could, including downloading porn movies to her phone but whenever i touch her, instead of getting aroused, she will tell me that it is tinkling her. For this 13years of marriage, my wife has never initiated sexual moves
I tried outside about 5 years ago against my wish, and till date the lady often worries me because i can perform naturally without any aid.
i am now thinking of getting a side chic who will take care of my sexual desires and leave my wife to be taking care of the home because am tired of begging for sex everytime. what is your take? insults are welcomed.

Its a good idea and be ready to exect pregnancy and make her a second wife

Men love sex the way women love children

Failure2019:
Firstly I'm 21, I make $2k a week and I live with my mum.
I've been looking at getting a BMW e36/46 for cheap for journey to school because I've been spending roughly on buses and cabs , found one I like messaged the guy with it and it's almost a done deal.
I told my mum i was gonna pick it up this weekend but she said no for the reason that it will take too much space, which is total bs we live in a mini duplex and usually have 3 cars here. 2 belongs to my mum and the other one goes to my sis.
It's really a minor issue, it's not like I need a car, but I feel like I'm being held back from making my own decisions.

If car is your desired luxury at this time of your life can you afford to maintain the car

How good working condition is the car or you want to be going to mechanic every day

Well if you can afford a car then you can afford to train yourself in school then and that means you are man enough to get your own apartment

But am believing that you want to use the car to impress others and flex

Just chill and save more so that you can have a better car for easy movement when the time comes

Secondchance123:
This is my true life story
I had a job, a place to live comfortably, take care of myself, a responsible young lady, I was focus on my job, had savings, then i met a guy, courted, got engaged, planned my wedding, because he was not so financially ok, i used 80% of my savings during the cost of the wedding, resigned from my job, relocated to another state to start a new life, got to my new home and discover my husband has an anger issues, notin I do was good enough, gets angry and beat me up, throw things at me, still communicated with his ex, I tried looking for a job I didn't get, it got worst that he broke my fone and destroyed my things in anger, 3months later he told me he's not interested in the marriage anymore, he called my family and his that he wants me to leave else he will do something to me his going to regret, one day he came home, transfered my tp to me and told me I had 24hrs to leave, he helped me packed my things the next morning, went and get a cab, carried my load to the park, I thought it was a joke until I found myself in Lagos, am back at my mum's place, I have cried, asked God what I did wrong, where I went wrong, I feel I just threw away my life for nothing. I have notin to live for again, no job, no home, no money, I feel so used and abandoned, please I need help, advice, whatever will help me out of this situation, cause I just wanna sleep and not wakeup, its been toughest couple of days in my life. What do I do with myself now No friends no one understands what am going through..

Just be calm, your situation is not the worst
What if you already have children and he chased you out with them all

You will bounce back but you have to pass through this trying times with faith and hope in God

Be grateful he asked you to move out instead of your family bringing out your corpse

Just gather yourself together

brian91:
Hello guys. I tried not to create a new moniker for this and swallow the pride else i use this.
Am in my early thirties, with a good career(Network Security) else i should be relocating soon by God's grace for further knowledge. I am in a serious relationship(dated 2 years) already proposed. She's a newly graduate and tryna push a career too. Our intention and plan is to relocate together but i FEAR for my sanity and emotion as i had read so many life stories of women turning to become something different upon arrival, some imperfection she portray although i ain't perfect either. I am never for divorce else i took my time up to this age before i decide to propose.
One of it is, she is naive that i saw how guys disturb her and i be like why do you give number in the first place; secondly, she is a bit stubborn not that i can't put her in place but my fear is it's a woman world that any little thing they call the cops. All of this she had promised not to ever happen again and ask i give her second warning to prove herself. I am still scared cos have read, heard and seen how wives turned against their sweet heart to the extent of tarnishing and disrupting the husband/partner life and pursuit.
I need your further view on this, I AM LOOKING INTO DOING A PRENUP but don't know if it can be slided into our marriage document without she, her family or my family knowing about the contents?

NB: I shouldn't have said this but let me. An incident happened that she was at fault but in a way to persuade and beg, she seized my phone, locked the door at me and promise to pick a knife at herself. Although she ain't aggressive to fight me but i fear she might frustrate me to do what i detest so much.

RoyalRoy
Seun

Listen to your heart and follow his direction
Your intuition can't be wrong

Obaaderemi2:
What they're saying is that particular POS terminals meant for selling of goods like the ones in supermarkets will no longer be used to withdraw or send money. They will be used only for payment of goods.

Well detailed

OdogwuMoney6:
Can 2M be enough for a single guy to rent a house and living comfortably in Lagos?

I'm currently living with my parents and I'll be 22 by June.. I plan on moving out of their house by the end of this year or latest, early next year (so help me my creator)...

But I'd like to know or have a rough Idea of how much I should budget to live comfortably... I've place my budget at 2M for rent and other amenities or accessories. I'll be schooling at LASU and I know the price for a decent room and parlour self con is around that kind 200-250k....so guys, please help me out.

Well you already have what it takes to start

That money you have is enough to get accommodation and furnish it

The only area you may have issue is being focused with your education and career not allowing ladies to distract you from your focus

lummy247:
Please, I need advice. I went through my husband's phone and I saw a message he shared with his side chick.

In the text message, the side chick was telling him to get something for her mother. He responded that he doesn't have an idea on what to buy. The lady later suggested that He should buy Provisions for her.

They talk everyday and they exchange romantic texts everyday. They even have a pet name for each other.
My husband is a Civil Engineer and some weekends he travels for 'work', I know he has gone to see her.

This relationship with the side chick is gradually affecting my marriage. I have the fear of what will happen if she gets pregnant. For him to see her mother, it shows that they are already very close. He also sends her money. I see the transactions on his Bank App.

Please I need advice, what can I do.

If you know that you have never pushed him to the wall in any way, just seat him down and let him know the implications of having a committed extra martial affairs

But if you have made him to starf dating outside the marriage, then you need to change some attitude of yours

Men will always want to be where their heart will find peace of mind
Especially of such a man provides enough for their family but their wives treats them in an ill mannered way

I am not justifying him having affairs outside his marriage but by default, they will behave so

Goodlady:
Her choice though. Cos some men deserve nothing but pain!

Chai 🤦‍♀️

whisper88:
Good day house, your advice and knowledge of the subject matter is highly required.

I would want to change the surname of my son, as we are the fifth generation bearing the name of someone I never knew. I want him bearing my father's native name as surname, which would in turn mean his name would be different from mine(surname wise). So please experienced people in the house, what could be the future implications of such actions?

Your warm inputs would be very appreciated, mods please help a brother.

I will advise your son bears any name from all your names

For example, if you bear ADEKOYA OLAJIDE PETER, let him bear any names from this three names

Anything short of that is not acceptable

Its easier to trace such a name rather than importing a name that you don't even bear and give to a child as surname

He too will continue with your own name for the future untill he decides too for his own family

Guest2008:
I read something kind of scary on the internet today and I'm finding it difficult to believe..

Is it true that for every successful pregnancy and delivery, you lose something in you? It could be voice, sight, hearing, sanity, body parts or any other thing...

Nothing of such pls
Just don't shout too much during labor

God will give you a Hebrew woman delivery system where they deliver with less trauma

Afodot0022:
Good day nairalanders. Its always nice to interact with you guys and get wise advice from you guys. Many people know me well and my story and also have idea about my situation and story. Anyway i have new updates for you guys and need your input and advice as usual. Irrespective to the issue between myself and my wife, we have been living seperately now since this year January. Though the kids are still with me and reason being that they have already started school this term when i seperated from my wife and dont want to change their school cos have already made payment, my intention was for them to finish this term and go to their mom for proper care as they are still young and female and needed their mom close to them. Last week i told my wife that she should be ready to accept the kids by this month end and she wasn't 100% in tune to that. I was surprised when my mom called me this morning and told me that my wife said she is going to send a lawyer to me to sign some papers agreement, i was kinda mad when i heard that and dont know what she is planning to come up with such plans. Something tell me maybe she wants us to have an agreement on the upkeep of the kids and what i will be responsible for when the kids later move to her. But i was annoyed cos for the 5 years we were married, i have been the one taking care of the financial responsibility of the home, both feeding,bills, school fees and other utilities, i have never defaulted and I just felt bad cos even though we are going to go our seperate ways, i will never neglect my kids and will always provide for their needs cos am a responsible man to the core, for her to go to this route, i felt insulted and angry at her. Presently i don't know how to handle this issue as am still upset. Now my question to experience married people both still married, seperated or divorce is that how do i go about this, should i go ahead to sign the paper the lawyer is going to bring and if i sign, what will be the outcome or repercussions paraventure i fail to meet up with the agreement stated. I really need advice from everyone cos this woman that i married have being a torn in my flesh and have decided to divorce her irrespective of anything. She has really getting to the height of it.

Since you have already made up your mind to divorce her, you just have to be with those children and if possible allow her to visit them or be with them where you guys agreed to meet as a meeting point for the children

If you should sign anything, it will be used against you because you may default by error and the worst is you don't know the content of what she is cooking

She really mean you and left for me, don't accept any letter neither should you know the content

Just be with the kids and you can get a helper to assist in running the home until you make up your mind to file for a divorce

At the court, let the judge decide what will be for you to sign and accept to sign

MaDaRa01:
My conscience is judging me.

A woman that i sometimes patronize left a kid to watch her shop. I wanted to buy rice. I ask him for the price because the price do flunctuate, which he said it is 100, no 50, no 20 naira. I shock, then the devil enter me and i said whether e no go sell 10. I told him to sell me 5cup of rice, after he measured and tied it, i gave him 100 and told him to take the remaining 50 and not to tell the woman so that she will not collect his 50 tip.

Kid was happy, i was happy, trader lose.

Now this evening, rice no let me eat, i am just thinking of going back to do restitution.

How do i go about it without the trader getting angry?

Go and confess that's all