₦airaland Forum

yommen:
But why save for avoidable trouble? Why prepare yourself for a life of frustration?

Is his choice to decide what he wants

He knows the financial implication and his spirit is high on it

advanceDNA:
If they have 4 children what will happen??

Go back and read the post from the beginning

Then understand the cost of getting to 4 children through that medical procedure

00FFT00:
Good advice, but you sidestepped the crux of his question, which is, whether his wife is right in her behavior or not.

She is not right but women are drama queens

Ebelelivinston:
I got married to my virgin wife two years ago and she gave birth last year December which means my daughter is for months old now
Myself and my wife aren't staying in the same state, though I opened a shop for her where she's residing.Am the type that is addicted to checking my wife's phone each time I visit her.So,one day that I visited her, as usual,I went to her phone and saw a love chat on her Whatsapp with one man, like usual ,I asked her about the chat she told me everything between she and the guy.
The guy is her neighbor but he is not residing at the place where my wife is but that's the family house and he comes back every weekend.He has been disturbing my wife who is holding a baby for sex.We decided to set him up and I told my wife to invite him yesterday when he isn't aware that I'm around.Finally,he came and I caught him red-handed,but instead of attacking him,I decided to advise him.He was thankful I didn't disgrace him.My fellow nairalnders,did I act weak or right?

What you did has nothing to prevent both of them from going down to the game

First of all, you live a different place from your wife, as a young couple,

Why didn't you take your wife along
Because you are also chasing women where you are, so her presence will disturb you from going after your chics

What makes you think she has not slept with that man

Men goes after pregnant women talk more of one with a child

You wanted an unexperienced wife that's why you went for a virgin
Now when she is hot, how do you expect her to calm her nerves especially as you are not even around

I am not supporting her love chat

Same way I did not support your idea of living her to stay alone while you monitor whatever you think you want to monitor. Who tell you say you fit monitor woman?

Whatever she is selling from that shop can't feed your family in a month

So close that shop take her along and open a shop for her wherever you are settled

Better still ler her be facing child bearing till you decide where to settle down as a family man

You will keep on suspecting your wife till you breakdown

Zeal0000007:
thanks dear for your encouragement, I'm a sailor currently chasing my license hoping to get it before the year runs out, the license program is a six months course we started January to finish by July and least any company can pay as soon as u get the license is 500k upward, it's as not really being easy coping cos currently u need to be in class without working, I have not.been working.

She at the other end is a 18yrs gal, but thinks and behave like a 30yrs old woman very mature , humble and homy knowing what to do at all time, she has really been a piece of mind to me, I really suffer in my previous relationship.

Also for career , she has been learning chemist before she had misunderstanding with the woman she was staying with so had to relocate to my area where I met her at the market, so I have made an arrangements with a family friend so she could go over there and continue building herself in chemist , as soon as I'm balanced I intend setting up somewhere for her (chemist), that will be after our marriage.

You have a good plan for her, your marriage and your future

God will approve them for you

Zeal0000007:
well spoken but with a good pay one can sustain it. If u target 3 to 4 kids when ever she's pregnant u go for it , I feel I can do it, my woman has brought peace of mind to me ever I met her after terrible 7yrs in my previous toxic relationship, I see my new gal as a God sent exactly what any man could look for in a woman. Though the money is not yet there , I'm in early stage of my career no money yet, but I know it will come. I don't want to loose this gal she's a peace of mind, first time I'm feeling loved in a very long while .

For the fact that you are satisfied staying with her for the rest of your life

Pls follow your heart so that you will be satisfied for thr choice you made

In the issue of child bearing, you musnt go up to 4 children unless you love children

So now you are aware of the medical procedure that awaits you any time she is pregnant,

Start saving towards that from now and carry her along so that she too will contribute what she can

Femmyfamous4u:
Hello all, I need to know if I'm doing some things right or over reacting. My wife and I just married some months ago and we just spend here and there on stuffs. I bought food stuffs in the house and told her I will place her on 40k monthly to cover for soups and all and I expect her to add to it if it's not enough. I foot all bills- house rent, Power, and all . She earns a decent 6 figures salary also which is slightly higher than mine without the allowances I get. She expects me to still give her another allowance apart from the 49k I give her for food. Each time she buys stuff in the house she always want me to pay back in full; most times, I just pay a part of it which she always frowns and complains about. It appears she has a notion that her money is her money and mine is ours. My income is more than hers though. Do you think I should still give her personal pocket money?

I think if you don't start now to set a standard on how to manage your incomes, you will end up giving her all you have

And she will either save hers or spend it on fashion

The two of you should have investment plans before the children starts coming

If you don't plan now, you may not be able to plan for the future

Mrlance15:
My mum is unemployed, thanks to my deadbeat dad, I'm a middle child in my family, the siblings before me aren't doing well, and the two after me are just secondary school kids, my dad never invested in us educationally and in other relevant areas he's obligated to perform, infact he bailed on us and start living on his own, he even stopped financing my education I had to drop out, so I'm a uni drop out rn, he believes taking care of your children is not his responsibility and he doesn't owe us anything, that after secondary school he has tried and doesn't owe you university or anything, he always tell us that helping us isn't his obligation that his little contribution which is primary school education is mercy enough, he made it clear we won't inherit anything from him that we should go and hustle on our own, he actually loved his first kids more, he gave them everything and neglected me and my siblings, he always lament on how he prefers his first wife to my mum and we're liabilities, this is because his first children are well to do and they send him money from time to time with a stern warning that he shouldn't feed us with the money they sent, and they told him that if he wants to keep recieving the money he should alienate himself from us (me and my siblings) so he did that, my dad is a terrible person, everything I have said is just the tip of an iceberg but I won't go into everything in detail.
My problem is everything fell on me due to my dad alienating us and my mum being unemployed, among my siblings I'm the only one doing well financially, it's not enough but I make average money from time to time with freelancing.
Feeding is on me, rent, hospital bills, my mum is indepted to many people and I work tirelessly to clear her dept gradually, this made me take loans and all, now I'm in my 20s and I haven't done anything with my life, I have no savings, no car, nothing, because everything I make goes into family upkeep, everything is on me, even my older brother rely on me for recharge card, that's how bad it is, so I'm the only one carrying everything, my problem now is since family issues won't let me invest in myself, will I be in this endless circle of redundancy and turn out to be a failure later in life? Because at my age I should have savings or move forward in life, I'm always broke because any money I get goes into family problem, I don't do anything for myself and I'm close to 30.

Sorry for being in such a terrible situation

If your mum had married a caring Batchelor, your dad would have been committed to you guys

If your mum was an independent woman who struggles without waiting for her husband, she would have been better than this

Most men who later marry second wives are less caring about them because the first wife will play her game to pay the second wife back when the man is getting older and her own children must have been established

So your dad is dancing to the tune of the first wife at the detriment of your mum and her children

Just do the one you can and leave the rest

Problem no dey finish for family matters

Voice22:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J4XZphzHH7s

Family bury their mother in grand-style by using a majestic cooking pot as côffin in Ghana.
https://www.instagram.com/p/CqcuPQ_rzlo/?igshid=ZWU2MTYxZTY=

Was her body butchered or folded into the pot 🙄🙄

Rapmoney:
It is a normal work rule for employees not to use mobile phones during work hours, except using mobile phones is part of your job description.

However, due to the fact that some employees tend to flout the rule, some employers, especially in one-man businesses, have deemed it fit to ask employees to submit their phones when they arrive work in the morning and collect back after work.

As a worker, can you work in a place where it is required that you submit your phone?

Drop your opinion.

I will submit my phone
So far it will make me to concentrate on my job and improve my productivity for a better appraisal

Davizee:
The truth is that I actually got admission last year but to there was no money to further it. What if it happens again?

Chai
May God make away from you and your family in Jesus name

Davizee:
My parents are really working hard especially my mom but I don't seem to understand why life is cruel to us. This is the uttermost reason I hate life and everything

Pls take it easy
Life is not sweeter for anyone

Just put your hope in God and trust in him

The most important thing now is for you to gain admission and you will understand why the fingers in our hands are not equal

SundayNightGist:
Omo! You sound like you're talking from experience dear. Kindly throw more light. Thanks, I'll be waiting

😂 Lol

Jb95:
I love your point of view. The problem with so called feminism movement is the direct comparison to men approach.

So women can be both weak and delicate but at the same time carry out the strongest of tasks in terms of what women by nature are designed to carryout.

The only problem with their strength comes when they try directly compare themselves to men, don't u think?

For me, it doesn't make any sense for any woman to compare herself with a man

Nature has already designed things the way it should be

That women are stronger in some areas doesn't equal a woman to be the same equality wih a man

For the fact that a woman can't pregnant herself is enough to make us understand that they are not equal with a man

And since men are not designed to carry pregnancy, go through labour to birth a child, means that women are stronger in that area

Davizee:
That's what they told me even my pastor
He said when he was 16 he left his parents and that I should try to be catering for myself so that I won't be a burden to my parents just because my parents went to beg for food

I think your pastor is giving you wrong information about life

If your parents are beging for food, it's their problem and fault because probably they didn't work hard

So how does he want you to make a living if not Yahoo

If this can come on a white background that will be nice

But this black background makes it look uninteresting

joeeee240:
Lmaoo
So she should go ahead and get the tattoos abi

You are the one saying so

I said he should be romantic

Zeal0000007:
I and my gal are planning settling down despite genotype not matching , she's AS same with me, but because of medical technological advancements, we visited a specialist who told us that we can still marry if we so desired to be together.

Just that If we can afford the cost of going for foetus testing whenever she's pregnant so as to ascertain the genotype of the child. According to him if the test is conducted and it turns out to be AA or AS, we can keep it, but if it's SS we determate, I have spoken to my gal and we are yet a decide despite this seeming goodnews that we can still be together if we choose to, she really wanted us together same with me.
On my part, I have been in terrible and toxic relationship for the past 4years that almost claimed my life but God served from her. And this my current gal came along and she's exactly what I prayed God for, she's really like a gift to me, since she came I have had peace of mind I don't want to loose her because of genotype but thank God for this technically medical advancement , please I want to know if anyone have undergone this treatment before , what's your experience or experiences

You should have asked the Doctor the possible cost of such procedure that's where you would have started with

Then you can compare it with your income

Alternatively, you guys will can adopt a child pending when you can afford the cost of that medical procedure including all expenses and drugs

Meanwhile enjoy your relationship till you find your way out

Treassured:
Hmmm.

Lol

NewGuest1:
According to "myigboname.com", "Chiedego" means "God has written it" but according to my sources "Chineke dere" is a more proper translation.
Can someone familiar with the Igbo language verify that that name and its meaning are legitimate?

The first one translate to God has written

The second one translate to God wrote

I go with the first one

SundayNightGist:
So I went to town to sample the opinion of Nigerians on the merits of dating a financially stable woman and these are the responses I got:

1. Dating a financially stable woman is a blessing. When she says "I love you" you know it comes from the heart and not because of empty
stomach or human hair

2. When a woman on an empty stomach tells you "I love you", her own is very dangerous. It breeds the worst form of deceit and entitlement

3. I laugh. She might be financially stable and still say she loves you without meaning it. That could be due to a hundred and one reasons

4. You just know the emotions are real

5. Financially stable women and multiple partners are like 5 & 6. You're not the only one they love

6. Some men never hear "I would take you out" from their babe even by mistake

7. She go change

8. Most of the time it comes from the (starving) vagina

9. The emotions are real

10. But most of this set of people can raise shoulder

11. Omo, na real blessing

12. But they tend to misbehave

13. And she fit even give you money join


Hmmmn! How true are these responses?

If you are dating a financially stable woman, just respect yourself that's all

That word respect yourself means so many things

Islandboi:
Yes I said what I said. That thing called marriage is not for guys that are still struggling. 3 of my neighbour pikin are not going to school again as I speak. The man is even owing 7 months house rent and it’s draining him.

Landlord don come house use vex throw them outside. His wife is working as well but the money is just not enough. Love is just never enough. It’s really a tough one on them.

Note : I’m not using my neighbour predicament to laugh or anything. I’m only stating the fact and to advice young men out there not to venture into marriage when you don’t have money.

It depends on so many circumstances and situations

In your neighbor's case,

He needs money more than love to be happier in that marriage

Emilia154:
I don't know what to say,ever since I and my former bf broke up.it has been really hard for me to love again.i am in a relationship now, but I don't feel the vibes at all.anytime I and my new bf are together.i will just remember my ex all of a sudden.this my new bf is really trying for me.he is an awesome guy.he is trying to make me forget my past.but I can't.i have tried everything to forget about my ex ex but I can't.i really want to move on but I can't.if there is any advice you can give me,pls do.i will appreciate

Honestly you are the one holding yourself

You are lucky to get another friend who is proving the worth of friendship with you so enjoy this before you loose him and start regretting

As for your ex, it's not easy forgetting an ex especially the one we love

You will keep remembering him until it fades away which is not coming soon

Rosehinkle:
As a man in a relationship whether as dating couple or married. If your spouse cheating is a big deal for you and you have so much trust for your girlfriend or wife. My advice for you is check her phone ....From Facebook, Instagram, Whatsapp( whatsapp calls and archived chat), email( check ins locations on her Gmail location, lookout for credit/debit alert from/to any particular guy) or any other messenger you can find in her phone. Check call log, message box, photos and deleted photos. Check her bolt/Uber apps if she doesn't drive. Look out for any app lock vault and try to find the pass to it. In all these try as much as possible for you not to be caught while in the act. if you eventually spot any evidence, make sure is legit with enough proof before confronting your spouse else they will deny&convince you making you feel bad.
That your saint wife or girlfriend is probably f*cking someone else for years now. Especially those boyfriend that are about turning to husbands and school fees payers. But if cheating ain't a big deal for you then I think you shouldn't go through all this stress

You have just adviced men how to die untimely death

Whats about men who cheats with impunity, so their women should check their phones and sleep into coma

gfelo:
My wife is a very beautiful woman, when i mean beautiful she is beautiful, very light just like half cast, we got married in the year 2020, we have our first child sept 2021,

Immediately after marriage my wife's sister move in to stay with us, we are good, until after my wife took in she no longer take care of her appearance, i complained she never care i thought is because she was pregnant.

After delivery the same thing, i try buying her sexy clothes but she will end up giving it to her sister, telling me that she, being a married woman can not wear all those things. now this thing is affecting me seriously.

Her sister leaving with us dress very neat, and very sexy, her dresses includes bumb short and all manner of body exposure clothes, especially when am home, i don't know what to tell my wife before she will started saying am having a crush for her sister.

The problem with you is that you love beauty and good out look

She in her own side doesn't see the reason why she should be putting on those things

Pregnancy changes women so you have to adjust your taste before you mess up things by crushing on her sister

Donsgv:
I'm a young guy of 29 years old,i started masturbating since may 2012,that's 11 yrs ago i does it constantly every day,i need help i try every means to stop it but prove abortive,house i need your advice

Meaning you don't have a girl friend or you are not into any relationship

If you don't have any, try and go into a relationship that will lead you to marriage

Instead of wasting time on jacking
Use that time and make babies

Wordsfrombimpe:
Let’s discuss

Honestly there is nothing like wife material or husband material

Every one should behave well to avoid disappointments and insults in a relationship

Davizee:
In a few months time I am gonna be 19 . I am already afraid as I thought by now I will be already catering for myself but my parents are still feeding and it is making me depressed. I am presently preparing for the upcoming JAMB examination and depression isn't making me able to concentrate. I am just all by myself. Please I need help, I am the second child of my parents.

What makes you think that at 19yrs of age, you should be catering for yourself

Do you think Nigeria is USA

JUMO95:
Who has noticed the increase in single motherhood today?

What is resposible for this

Its the same rate with single dad's

Moreover, ladies of nowadays thinks pregnancy can pin a man down

And a man who is not fully prepared for fatherhood will not want to cooperate

Jb95:
Hey guys, this is a little social experiment I want to carry out.

I believe terms like 'weaker vessel' is what has birthed the rise of feminism, where women try step out of the socially constructed boundaries they feel society place on them and try to prove that they can do just about anything a man can do. Now whether that 'presumption' is true or not is a matter for another day

But we all know that whether a woman describes herself as feminist or not, they always want to feel special, and so a term such as 'delicate gender' seems to put some uniqueness in the description of a woman

So this question is going to the females: as a woman, are you comfortable with being described as
1. Weaker Vessel
2. Delicate Gender
3. Both
4. None

You are welcome to give your reasons for your answers.

They are both weaker and delicate Gender

But if you ever hear what a woman did, you will understand that they are actually the strongest

kyber:
Since I entered school have not been able to approach girls in public, it’s not that I’m shy o
If they talk to me I flow well with them and if i have something to ask or tell them I know how to talk to them especially those in my department based on assignment or for notes

But how do I approach other girls that are my spec from other department to collect their number or toast them instantly?

Please guys give me lines I want to approach girls starting from this evening

Note: am I good looking enough not to be turned down ? (Pictures below)

If every man is afraid of being turn down by a woman, by now men will never be in a relationship

So go out their and face the challenge before you ask us how to innitiat love making

Wordsfrombimpe:
When should a serious relationship lead to marriage and be introduce to family

Let's discuss

I think the relationship mode will demand for it

Especially when both parties are of marriageable age