₦airaland Forum

Maybe the elder was right in a way. You would have had a crush on her even at that young age and it lay dormant in your subconscious mind all these while. Since you were too young to distinguish love and like, you would'nt have realised it then. You've heard about childhood trauma n stuff, right? Even when somebody is too young to understand what is happening with them, they go on to bear the consequences all their life. Same way, the supressed feelings you had for her is just emerging now. I'm just curious, are you happily married? Coz the above mentioned plus the dissatisfaction (in one or more areas of your marriage) could be the cause of the repeated dreams.

beautylash:
Me I don’t know o! My mummy told me that any girl who allows a man to touch her is ashewo. I guess that makes me an ashewo – several times over. So you see, I’m too compromised to be objective on the matter. But if I must, I’d say 1. Let me explain.

One of my great loves in life is the cinema. I love the old-Hollywood ones. The ones with slick haired leading men who wake up with a cigarette in their lips, swig bourbon between perfectly timed one-liners  and have no qualms ‘back-handing’ their female support actress across the face – on screen! Damn! When men were men!

I digress. What I’m getting to is that these movies have provided me with a vast repository of wise sayings and I like to pull them out in the middle of conversations ‘cus I think they sound cool, and by association, make me look cool. I mean, how cool do you have to be to say something like "I’m big! It's the pictures that got small!" (Sunset Boulevard); or, "We'll always have Paris" (Casablanca); or, “You had me at ‘Hello’” (Jerry Maguire); or - one of my favourites and one I’ve still not found an opportunity to use – “I love the smell of Napalm in the morning!” (Colonel Kilgore in Apocalypse Now)

Again I’ve gone off on a tangent. Forgive me. Anyways, there’s a movie line that comes to mind now. It was delivered by Eddie Murphy in Harlem Nights. He was planning to do a ‘mission-impossible’ to get even with some pretty badass folks when someone questioned the sanity of his apparent suicide mission. Unperturbed, he replied: “It’s not how many people you kill; it’s who you kill.”

Now let’s adapt that to the current discussion: “It’s not how many men you sleep with; it’s who you sleep with.” Sounds nice, doesn’t it?

How (not ‘what’) do I mean? You see, some boys should never be pitied. Out of compassion for his situation, you let one sorry faced  have some, and next thing you know he’s telling everyone how he ‘hit that.’

That, my dear, is how ashewos are made: by loud mouth infantile boys who feel they must share there good fortune of seeing behind a girl’s pants with everyone who has hears and no ipod ear-plugs in them.

You can sleep with the entire IT-department and still be seeing as a virgin; but make a mistake and do anything with just one silly boy and you become an ashewo.

i dont know if that help!!

Are you always this way or is it the weather ??

ROFL @ the story

OP, don't worry about trivial issues like this at this time. Your private part could be the 100th one your doc is seeing that week/month. When you get started with that pain, you are not really going to be bothered with who's around you. And when you are done with it, you'll be so engrossed with your lil one that you'll hardly get time to think of who was there and what they saw. All the best for a safe delivery !

@ Topic

No Sir. You are not a devil. YOU ARE A DEMON !

If the quarrel is not big, I wouldn't do that. But if the guy is a violent one who gets physical and picks up a cutlass for a small disagreement, then I might do it

@OP

If your username in anyway is an indicator of your age, you better get ready to face the world, coz this is the real world! The only thing I see unreal in your problem is YOU ! For god's sake, stop inviting men you meet online over to your place  They could be serial killers/despoilers, psychopaths, ritualists (never mind, you won't understand, itz ur age)

Wait a sec, did u ask him for a BB ?

Hmmm, if she has been close to the guy (as in friends) it shouldn't take her much time to make up her mind. But if the guy is a total stranger, just an acquaintance or a friend's friend etc etc she should probably take enough and more time. But then these things vary from person to person. Some girls, inspite of being desperate deep within, just love to play hard to get!

jennykadry:
this attention seeking poster. From promoting scam in the travels section to promoting his impotent skills here in the family section.

Your wife should divorce you for the following reasons.

1. You are too difficult to comprehend.
2. Your low s/p/e/r/m count
3. You are a fraud
4. You are worth nothing .

^^How old is he?? Assuming he is an adult, I feel he is doing it deliberately to drive you nuts.
On the other hand, if he's been this way from childhood, he's got some serious behaviour issues' which has to be addressed ASAP.

Poster

Partners need to be patient for a marriage to work. Marriages are not about who wins or loses and by the time most people understand this, much damage would have happened.  A little bit of adjustment, compromise and patience could give you a lifetime of happiness and peace.  You say you are just confused in the marriage, not determined to divorce her. You have your answer there. It takes two to tango. For just a day, try to let things go her way. She will be surprised to see the change and might return the favor back. Love can do wonders.

Regarding child, I think it is god's way of giving you time to sort out your issues before you bring in another being into this world. A child should grow up seeing his parents loving and respecting each other. Once both of you start loving and respecting each other, you'll see changes in you life, child inclusive.  All the best !

:p

yeye4live:
u cant tell me ure a guy,i doupt dat 4rm any angle,ure just one sick girl turing your boyfriend into an ATM machin, n GOD will catch u one day,your cup will b filed up

9jafetish:
I am in no means a cruel person it' just that i just happen to be an honest person.The first time i met my friend i thougt she was the most hideous girl in the world, i use to hang around her to make myself feel better ,

So you considered yourself to be ugly before you found this uglier girl? SMH

I have to agree on one thing , that friend of yours is a very very unlucky woman. Not because she is ugly, but because of a hypocrite for a friend. Why do people need enemies when they have friends like you. I have often wondered how friends could snatch each other's husbands and break homes. I wouldn't be surprised if you do that to that poor girl if she ever happens to gets herself a good looking hubby !

The woman has a job that can possibly take care of all her needs and that of the kids. She should quietly walk out of the house with the kids. If he was bold enough to do it right under her nose in their own home, with her own neice, he could have been doing much nastier things outside. Moreover a man inspite of siring 5 kids still going around impregnating young girls can never be a role model for his kids. He could end up despoiling his own daughters, for all you know.

OP
A man who is not man enough to walk up to  the woman he loves and confess his feelings may not be taken seriously, if she ever accepts him that is. Would you want to involve your sis in everything that happens between the two of you as a couple? If you say yes, go ahead and ask your sis to get involved. Else, shed those inhibitions and ask her out.

A word of caution if you ever get involved with someone : try to keep a third person as much as possible away from  your relationships. An ideal couple doesn't need a mediator. They should be able to talk and sort out t  heir problems.If they can't, they shouldn't be in a relation .

Whatever you plan to start, try to set up a telephone booth/box alongside . You could also stock calling cards, recharge cards et al.These hotels charge way too much on international calls.

Thamila?

No, 35 or 25, a 16year old is still a child in many ways.

@ Topic

Yes with a capital Y. A man who cannot accept you publicly, be it cyberspace or in real life is not worth it. Leave him and move on.

N.B: Flipside, you cannot expect a man to change his FB status or whatever immediately you start dating. The above mentioned is applicable only if you r in a serious committed relationship, as you mentioned.

OP

Well, so much for being so good! Move on, DO NOT TAKE HIM BACK INTO YOUR LIFE IF HE EVER COMES BACK. Meanwhile, take some time to enjoy your single status and wait for that wonderful man who values you and your love, not the money and the services you offer !

I repeat, DO NOT TAKE HIM BACK INTO YOUR LIFE IF HE EVER COMES BACK.I almost forgot to answer your question, he is wicked, not irresponsible.

@ OP

This situation could be a blessing if you have a good rapport with your landlord and could turn into a nightmare if otherwise. Itz upto you to decide how you want it. Goodluck !

If possible, try to have a friendly talk with him on this issue. If not, arrange a common friend to find out what caused him to think this way. You never know, maybe the wife was not very fond of you and would have tried to cause a rift between the both of you by accusing you of such an act !

^^Feel the mental issue is more appicable here as someone who was jilted and attempted suicide in December 2010 wouldn't wait for close to 7 months for the next attempt. She should've been out of the depression by now, with a change in environment with her visit to the UK and all.

Although the deceased was described as a sociable person, PUNCH METRO’s finding showed that she was neither on Facebook nor Twitter.

Ridiculous ! Many popular people, including actors and politicians are not on FB or Twitter. Does that make them any less social ?

May her soul rest in peace.

Mybe the man can call up hos parents n say he is in town for some urgent work/training and will have to be around , bu t will try to visit the folks once he is free, else will make up for this the next time he visits.

This woman has to be whipped a couple of hundred times everyday for a few years !!!

I r'ber seeing her in a movie where she played the second or third wife of a chief. As opposed to her regular cry cry roles, she was a baddie in that n I have to say she did a great job. The movie was about a chief suffering at the hands of his three wives when all the three made sure they gave him sleepless nights( n days). Does somebody know the name of that movie ??

@ OP
Totally agree with you.

rokiatu:
Some people will be poor for life.

Are saying that couples like does should not have kids?

Well sadly yes. Unless you are a sadist and want to bring into this world another being just so that he/she can be starved to death.

Godalone:
Is it a crime to be poor? I know it is not good to have kids you can not train. Do you know that they enjoy their marriage more than the rich? They shabi do that thing well well.

Parenthood comes with certain responsibility and one of them happens to be providing atleast the bare necessities to the child until they are old enough to fend for themselves. If you can't, stay away from siring just for the sake of siring.

@ OP

What does she do for a living?