Divine89: My children will be adopted, I had hope that they will return them to me one day because I have never missed any visitations, I have my own apartment and working 2 jobs I did everything with my power to prove to child service I am stable and capable of taking care of my children, I sow seed to the needy in Nigeria, have been to parenting class and anger management program hoping things will turn up fine but they don't have trust in me to have my babies back and I received the bad news about their adoption and I will have no more contact with them anymore. I am in tears, my heart is broken again and I decided to give up the fights. I am planning to relocate to a different country to start afresh, if God bless me with a husband and more children I will be grateful at least in the new country I will be able to have children and no authority will snatch them from me. I dont know if I need advice again but the reason I am writing this is too ease the pain I am feeling right now.
If really you are ready to change your attitude
You can sign and under taking for the last time to start behaving normal
As you have anger issues, it's affecting your children and your man
Eve if you relocate, you will still behave naughty . Why not talk to yourself and change it all
The problem is you and the solution is you, unless you are on drugs then let it be
I will keep this as short as possible. Please i need your help and opinions.
I gave up on love long ago, i just live my cool life, do my hussle, afford what i can, no worries over what i can't, get laid once in a while, no room for love matters as I'm very insecure due to previous bad experiences with women.
So came this babe, she's not very very beautiful and in fact not my spec but some how, we started like friends and in fact, i told her I'm not interested in any relationship. And that we should just be friends. So she agreed, but as time goes on, she opened up that she likes me but she don't want to date me, she just want a fling with me.
Note, she knows I'm smoking, because she has seen me with some few friends in the neighborhood smoking together. She seems not to have a problem with it.
We have not made love yet, and i am intentionally keeping it that way because i just want to be friends with her and even if we will date, we need time to get to know each other.
Now, i discovered that i know longer smoke outside anymore, and whenever she comes around, i dont do it too in my sitting room. If i must, i go to my bathroom, (i only smoke weed). I do this because i don't want her to be ashamed of me, (i dunno) and as for not smoking in the house, i don't want her to come to my place and my whole sitting room is all smokey.
So, could it be I'm falling in love with her or what is the reason or reasons for this new lifestyle of mine.
Should i get on a serious relationship with her? Could she be the one?
Thank you for your anticipated responses!
Love for a woman can make the most stubborn man to be as humble as a dove
I will keep this as short as possible. Please i need your help and opinions.
I gave up on love long ago, i just live my cool life, do my hussle, afford what i can, no worries over what i can't, get laid once in a while, no room for love matters as I'm very insecure due to previous bad experiences with women.
So came this babe, she's not very very beautiful and in fact not my spec but some how, we started like friends and in fact, i told her I'm not interested in any relationship. And that we should just be friends. So she agreed, but as time goes on, she opened up that she likes me but she don't want to date me, she just want a fling with me.
Note, she knows I'm smoking, because she has seen me with some few friends in the neighborhood smoking together. She seems not to have a problem with it.
We have not made love yet, and i am intentionally keeping it that way because i just want to be friends with her and even if we will date, we need time to get to know each other.
Now, i discovered that i know longer smoke outside anymore, and whenever she comes around, i dont do it too in my sitting room. If i must, i go to my bathroom, (i only smoke weed). I do this because i don't want her to be ashamed of me, (i dunno) and as for not smoking in the house, i don't want her to come to my place and my whole sitting room is all smokey.
So, could it be I'm falling in love with her or what is the reason or reasons for this new lifestyle of mine.
Should i get on a serious relationship with her? Could she be the one?
Thank you for your anticipated responses!
Love for a woman can make the most stubborn man to be as humble as a dove
eitsei: lolz...this is why ladies stay with an abusive man that is rich because he buys them flowers after knocking one of their teeth out.. of course he's a gentleman because he's spending lavishly on you
You need to wise up and also change your mind set about relationships
Slimdada: I want to know why a married Lady, whose husband is still alive,would go after a Young single man? This particular lady got married to her husband when the young man cashed out and had money, I don't know what paid the man but he had money back then but now currently he is broke they only managed to open a shop which the both of them are mismanaging, the man will come out In the morning and sell suddenly he will disappear and go drinking with the money Suddenly the wife be texting me on WhatsApp but I'm not talking to her because I'm not into married women, Because dating or having sex with a married Lady block's the future and destiny of the young man,same applies with young ladies that Go after,married men,sugar daddies etc
This same question is applicable to both sexes
Keep your woman well and she won't have the need to look else where
english1234567: I met this girl in December 2020, we started dating, she's a nice and homely girl to the extent I've seen. She stopped in secondary school and she has a son of 9 years. She's 27 years. She's not working. I'm a graduate and currently on my PhD program, I'm 37 years, not married and no child yet. I'm working and a little ok financial. The thing is I've never planned to marry a single mother and I've always wanted to marry a graduate. But the girl is pregnant. I'm so confused if I should marry her and start a family or we should just terminate the pregnancy. Cos i don't want to have a child out of wedlock. My major problem is her child cos the father did not take responsibility. The child lives with her family.
Am glad you did not mention that your greatest problem is her not being educated
You see that child that is living with her family, whatever little help you have, offer to him
You see that lady, she could be the one that will give you peace of mind in marriage
You see that pregnancy, you would have used a condom to prevent it and since you didn't use it accept it and go ahead with the plans of getting married
What you should be concerned about is how to help her upgrade her education
Being a single mother is not a curse, you have also made her a single mother too, if you reject her with the pregnancy
The boy can keep bearing the surname he is bearing, he will soon join you guys after marriage and that means you will be his father that he knows
My dear, tomorrow that child may be your source of joy, you can't tell
dollytino4real: children birth to my stepfather by another woman, who are they to me in Africa settings, because to me i don't see dem as my stepbrothers or step sisters I see dem as just a friend or strangers to me, pls air ur view if am right or wrong thank you, happy Sunday
The truth is, you have to see them as part of your extended families
It now depends on you whether to keep a good relationship with them or jus casual relationships with them
Nazgul: It's not the stupid questions that annoy me it's their silly spending. Even when it's obvious that the girl is clearly not into them, they keep spending the little they don't have on her.
Your assessment is wrong
They are spending just to show love and care and for entertainment
They also knows that the choice is for the woman to accept it or reject them
Serene123: Please I will need your constructive opinion on this. Been battling with this thoughts for some time now.
I engaged my girl last year. Reason why I did engage her was because I saw her intent to be with me. I have seen her gave out her cash to help get somethings for our new apartment. She has even used her cash to buy some properties she wants in the house when we get married. She has stood and defended me to her family on why she is getting married to me. She has really earned my trust and never regretted engaging her. She is one girl that every man will like to have as wife
In the course of our relationship months back, I noticed there is this guy that call her. I questioned and she said is just a friend. I have told her I am not comfortable with the call. Yes I have listened to the calls and it doesn't sound serious On 25th Dec I place a call across to her phone and she wasn't picking. She later told me reason why she didn't pick. While we were together I noticed she didn't pick cos she went out with the same guy I have been complaining about. I got to know via a pic. She has insisted nothing serious is going on. I was so angry and I needed to take her phone and check up something. We struggled with the phone and she injured her nails.. She is saying I am a woman beater and I have anger issue. She started keeping to herself and phone and was bold to tell me that this action of mine has succeeded in killing the feelings she has for me.
She has asked for time to get her mental health back and for close to two weeks now we haven't been flowing well..
I have tried to talk to her so we fix this shit but she said she needs time.
I have decided to give her the time she needs while I focus on something else. Yes, I miss her
I won't lie, is emotional for me and someone is currently trying to fill her vacuum by being all nice. I am getting closer to her, but my heart still yearn for my fiance.
I don't know if I am doing the right thing by being close to another lady. I don't know if I should belivee her that she has lost feelings for me and move on. I need your advise.
Sorry for the lengthy thread
The heart is always in need of its opposite sex, its meant not to be alone
Am glad you didn't see anything to hold against her over that guy in question
If you think you want to go on with another girl while giving her time to cool off, go ahead, even men are not faithful from the beginning of life
She definitely have other admirers but with time she will lay them off after marriage
If you think you have gotten another woman, wait and see what you will discover in her
Don't rush give yourself time
But learn to trust your woman, if you treat a woman well even without spending a kobo, she will not have any reason to cheat
prince2pac: A lot, been overthinking since way back, ways I was gonna make fam come up from the ground, a lot of stories I don't want to talk about
If you are over thinking on how to raise your father family up and you are developing BP, what happens when you get married and want to raise your family up ⁉️
Adjust yourself, person wey done die him own done end life goes on
prince2pac: I have been very sick for some months now, very sick, I exhausted all I had and there was no one to help me out, then during the Christmas giveaway I was lucky to be picked, all the money still went to my drugs. some days ago I took a 6000 loan from OKASH to get some drugs too, and with the way things are going for me, I might not meet the 14 days deadline. I don't know if anyone can help me sort this out.
Depression and anxiety have just made me mad, I have been living on amlodipine to calm my BP, I'm just 24. please someone help me with this...
You are too young to start struggling with BP, very soon the amlodipine will no longer carry you, meaning another drug will be added
BP drugs are expensive
The best for you is to shot down whatever that is depressing you
And you will bounce back health wise
As you take your BP drugs, you can down whatever that is the triggering factor
Anyway, what is depressing you at this early age of your life ?
virginprincess: Good evening nairalanders, pls i need advise, my counsin sister who is just 22 is demanding to live alone (she wants to move out of her father's house), but her parents disagreed with her decision.
This has brought a whole lot of confusion, because she is very serious with her decision and her parents (especially her mom) is totally against it.
Pls as a sister, what advise can i give to her, should i support her or i should advise her against it? and what are the of dangers living alone as a female?
Modified: My counsin is not a prostitue, I might not entirely know the reason she wants to live alone, but i'm sure her num1 major reason is noise, she is a very calm person who loves being alone, but since they are much in the house she doesn't have such opportuity, pls she's not a hoe, my question is what are the dangers of living alone as a lady?.
Living alone at that age is as risky as anything
I don't think noise is the reason for packing out
She wants freedom but she should make sure is not the kind of freedom that will lead to doom
At her age, she is supposed to be in school and live in a hostel
A Nigerian man, Elijah Amusan, who has been residing in Germany/Italy for five years has cried out for help to return back to Nigeria.
The man who spoke in Yoruba, said he arrived Italy in 2016 and has tried without being successful on getting his papers to legally reside there. He appealed to everyone to help him return home.
"My name is Elijah Amusan. I came to Italy in 2016. I tried getting my documents since 2016 to no avail. I tried getting a lawyer as well to help me get my document, I couldn't obtain the document.
I spent four years without a job or receiving any pocket money. I have come to beg everyone in Africa and in Nigeria to please rescue me so I can come back to Nigeria."
charles009: Good people of nairaland, Everything you are about to read is not fiction but certain reality.
At the heat of this DNA wahala, a married Ex called me on 6th of Jan to notify me that her son is mine and not her husbands. I remember vividly a certain Saturday in 2015, when we argued intensely over the paternity of the child during her pregnancy. She insisted it was her boyfriends, make una fear women. She swore she was single. Our calculations showed she was ovulating while we had some encounters. She proceeded to block me on all social media platforms and 2 months later, her friend informed me of her wedding.
The issue here is that I am married with two kids and expecting another, she told me her husband lost his job early 2018 and it has been a very rough patch for her family. she says she wants a divorce.
I asked for the boys pictures and it put instant tears to my eyes. Showed a few friends and the resemblance is striking so they said. The most painful of all, he looks not properly looked after.
I am doing fairly OK now, I wouldn't wanna to see my blood suffer, if you were in my shoes how would you handle this. My wife would not want to hear of another child...
Mature advise please...
The issue of your wife not wanting to hear of another child is not something to be worried about
The most important thing to do now is to call your ex and go for a DNA test with the child
If the result is positive, then infirm the husband about it after that inform your wife
You are likely to finally take the child into your family
But if the result is negative, then end it there with her
Still inform your wife and let her know everything and why you kept her in the dark is because you wanted to be sure of the DNA test and now that is positive you want her to know and accept the child
She will feel bad but the earlier the best for you all
Dymundz: Thanks for not judging me. By God’s Grace I will start my own business this year. One of my customer has promised to give me money and I will use it for business
It's well my sister, you have gone past the worst stage, it can only get better
I don't want to blame you for the life style you are living
But I will blame you if you don't plan well for yourself
It's not your wish to be identified with such but let it be your wish to get established and plan for yourself and your children
Dymundz: I have two daughters. They are my life my everything . I am not in a stable relationship. I sleep with men for a living. I made a biggest mistake of bringing men to my house every night to sleep with me while my children were in the house and my 12 years old daughter soon to be 13 is now coping everything I do. When I counsel her she respond to me that I can’t stop her because I am doing the same thing to. I beat her badly , I rob pepper on her body to stop her but she is still getting worse and worse. I stopped bringing men to the house . I meet them in hotel now to stop my daughter from behaving badly again . But she is becoming stubborn everyday. I don’t want her to be like me . I want the best for her. I know a lot of people here will insult me but I need advice because my daughter is very important to me. I need your advice
You know what ?
Stop be harsh with her
Seay her down and counsel her about such life and promise her that you have stopped it
Take her out with her sister to an eatry or fun place and give her a treat
Be more friendly with her
Gist with her and make her feel fun hanging around you
You must take it easy with her, else you guys will grow not bonding
As for you and your partners, restrict them to a guest house and make sure it ends there
Or let one of them rent an apartment for you and keep you as a mistress
kennywagz: Hello nairalanders, I know how you felt looking at my post before opening this, but pls know one thing am not a bad person or a foolish son, I just happen to have a *** mom..
The thing is me and my mum almost got into a fight yesterday. Now pls let me explain something to you... I understand how yall love your mother's and would do anything for her, I wish I could say the same for mine.
Anytime my parents get into a quarell my mother won't want to talk or do anything again. She goes to work and comes back late, lies down and sleeps.
It's over 5 months, she doesn't contribute anything, doesn't say anything, does not concern whether the children eat or not because of their quarrel..
I don't fight anyone but if I have a quarrel with my friends or bro, 2 days or the next sef we are talking. He will stay in the room by herself after work while we'll be in the palour eating, She will be in the room sulking.
I once came home and my junior ones told me they were talking about something and laughing and mom came out and said sheybi they are all laughing and very soon they will start crying. Like what kind of mother says that.
If you are looking for woman that curse and swear no one pass my mom. She has fought every of our neighbors, every last one of them. I can't count how many swear and cursed she has said to my father and even to we the children. My father's brothers and sisters, she has been keeping malice with themsince a month after her wedding. That's over 20 years ago. Something happend and she hates them. If you are seen with your aunt or uncle you'd be in serious trouble.
She has this toxic nature/character always wishing evil for others. If she doesn't like you and she sees you happy it's sadness for her... How can someone be like this.
Today one woman she has quarrelled with had a fight with her brother. My mother was happy, saying e don catch am, laughing and praising God. My father is sick and doesn't even have the strength. They don't talk, she stopped talking to me cause she says me and my dad are always planning what we will eat, that am now the wife abi.
I can't express how hateful I am towards this woman, my heart is full of bitterness towards her.. I can't possibly type everything that I personally go through because it would seem as if I came here just to spite my mother. No matter what, she is still my mother, I am just looking for advice.
I give the children money sometimes when they are angry and I cook the food cause she doesn't do anything. She's sees me as her enemy when you don't want to do it, we should come and be begging you. Everytime we get into a fight for very petty things I always go and beg her, you must beg else you and her are enemies she won't talk to you.. I greet her and she says next time I greet her she will swear for me. This negativity is too much, I am a very Sane person, I won't come and write all this if I ain't pained... I have a father I love and my siblings, but it's this woman now.
Pls what can I do, everyday everytime person go dey beg you for the most unreasonable and petty things, after swear and curses with bad words Don follow steadily.
Am sorry to say that your mum is vicious
It's either you people accept her government or deal with it
It's a pity your dad is weak, else you guys will join forces
In the interim, calm down and have a talk with your mother over her bad attitude, present it to her in a polite manner
She must have something to say and give reasons for her actions
I do flog him most times but yet he does the same thing.
There is a month I refused to make subscription
He senses came back
He is glued to the telly because your are always subscribing
Once you stop subscription his attention will move to other things
Get a nursery rhymes video and songs, play the video disc let him listen to it if you don't know how to handle a toddler like that, then you need to be taught on how to be a parent because the tougher one is when they get to teenagehood
I am a member of this family but just opened a new account to hide my identity.
Can I get a candid advice if it is wrong having a second wife?
I am married but somehow there is this other woman in my life that I love but can't just let go despite my efforts to keep her out of my life.
My heart always yearns for her despite the fact that I know such could hurt my wife and I won't be happy either if my wife has an affair too but I just can't move on without her in my life.
It's not a matter of being sleeping around but it's just that I love her and want to have her as a wife and I no doubt love my wife and the mother of my kids too.
I will provide details on how we got into a relationship in due course.But at a time my wife and I were separated for about 4 years which was the time I started dating this my girlfriend but please is it wrong, unusual or abnormal to love two women at the same time and have two wives?
I am just confused and indecisive.
Please,advice, especially from married men here and counsellors.
Thank you.
A man has the heart to love more than one woman to be compared with women who have only one love to give at a time
If you can't keep her as a mistress then inform your wife about getting married to her and watch her response
But be ready to deal with whatever the out come may be
Having two women has its own disadvantages
Just like dealing with two unknown angles
If you can endure what goes with it then follow your heart, but make sure you check your BP regularly
Durentt: in 2016, I was 16 year old and ND1 in fedpolybida.
I was staying with a HND student, Engr Sunny (very tall, skinny and fair), in a room of 6 and I had a bad behaviour of picking on people.
I used to take his clothes from the place he spread them to dry and then throw them far away in the gutter until he finally left the room to go off campus.
I have changed my behaviours and dont engage in things like this anymore.
but I need to apologise but I cant find him anywhere, I dont know his surname to look for him online
please what do I do?
cc Vincentjk
If really you don't have other means of connecting to him, go to God in prayers
Romance › Re: Why Do Some Married Women Go After Young Men?? by frozen70(f): 11:49am On Jan 17, 2021
