₦airaland Forum

Ryda:
Kindly post the rest of the update here, not refer us to your link


Modified
When you finally accept nature as it is.
I love her confidence

Dear Nigerian women with beards there's nothing to be ashamed of.

Lol... it's very easy for you to say this seeing that it doesn't take courage to tell others to be Courageous.

When a lady uses cream, y'all line up to call her names. When she doesn't, you body shame her. If she reads your comments and become suicidal, you'd be the first to ask why people commit suicide. It'd be understandable if you're kid, OP. But if you're really an adult, then there's a problem.

advanceDNA:
Interesting case....Most trans start to date their biological gender after transitioning..meaning they were gay right from the start before transitioning ...

But this Man U mentioned transitioned into a woman and still dated women after ......meaning she/he was heterosexual from the start and is still heterosexual in a way... fantabulous.. a rare specimen

Yeah ..isn’t it obvious why I choose you? u are always doing gay advocate on nairaland like someone paid you..

Now what annoys me about the LGBT community is that they are always trying to create a box to segregate heterosexuals from anything that’s not heterosexual. as if heterosexuality isn’t a sexuality.....like a “us vs them thing....

Trans for example, go through a lot just to fit into the man-woman spectrum only for a group called LGBT to pack them under an umbrella segregating them from what they desperately want to identify with..... I’ve seen many trans interview saying they just want to be plainly men or women and not be labeled lGbTQ....

I don't know you're experiences or how many gay people you interact with to have gotten this impression, but I actually find it mind blowing that anyone would suggest gay people are the ones segregating others. That's because the most basic desire of a gay person is to be accepted in society and be treated just like any other person. This is not to invalidate your opinion. I believe what you might perceive as segregation is a just a bunch of people trying to harness the power of solidarity. These guys are tormented, jailed or even killed in some parts of the world for being different, it makes sense for them to want to stick together and do thier stuff alone. It also makes sense for them to be wary of the people that kill them. Getting a gay person in Africa to trust you as a heterosexual guy is almost as difficult as getting a wild bird to trust you. And I don't really need to explain why this is the case. What the so-called LGBTQ+ community is doing is just trying to create a safe space for themselves where they, at least, feel free. Quite frankly, I don't think recklessly letting in the same people they're running away from into thier lives would be the smartest thing to do; wouldn't you say?

Now if you notice, I said the so-called LGBTQ+ community. That's because while I use the term to avoid having to mention all the words, I do not really like to refer to gay people as a community because that puts them in a box. People should be treated as individuals regardless of the herd you think they belong to and whatever preconceived notion you might have about that herd. The activities of the gay persons in the US, for example, shouldn't define how you see the one right beside you. The herd mentality is the reason we have so much conflicts in Nigeria today, don't you think?

I did laugh when I read you say I advocate for gay people as if I'm paid. I specifically created this account to decry every form of discrimination (classism, tribalism, sexism, homophobia, etc.). So your description of what I do actually made my day (it's night here actually, lol). I only wish I could convince you to have a rethink.

advanceDNA:
Is this guy now trans?? It’s be noticed gay men like to behave feminine

It’s like there’s a very thin blurry line btw gay and transgender ....

Both are technically attracted to the same sex... it’s just transgenders adjust their outward anatomy so that they fit into a pseudo heterosexual spectrum

Woundedlamb...am I seeing this wrongly??

Yes, there are a lot effeminate gay men. This probably explains why being effeminate is associated with being gay. But the fact is, we have just as many manly gay men. And while you may not believe it, effeminate people don't just like to behave like women, they are just like that. They don't know how else to walk, sit, laugh or talk. Just like a lady being feminine without consciously making efforts to do so, an effeminate child would behave like a woman without taking any decision at any point to do so. They don't learn it; a good deal of masculinity/feminity could you considered as traits.

You can tell a child would be effeminate from a tender age. He doesn't just behave like a girl but in some cases, prefers things girls like. In Africa, his parents would always criticise him, his teachers would make fun of him, his mates would bully him, etc. and yet, he wouldn't be able to do anything about it. Any efforts made to be "manly" would normally result in an awkward behaviour. Such kids go into extreme depression and/or low self esteem. Some even get suicidal as no one ever cares to listen or try to understand (especially the gay ones). What usually happens is that when they get to a certain age, they decide they don't care anymore. And to show this, they dress up dramatically as a way of saying, "I can't hide myself anymore, I call your bluff!"

Transgendering is a different ball game. While a lot of trans are gay, there are many of them who wouldn't be considered gay prior to transitioning. The only trans I know in person transitioned into a lady and she has a girlfriend. This means she wasn't gay before transitioning.

I don't know why you chose me to answer your question though.

Sirjendon:
Correct you spoken well. More blessing to your work,

Thanks sir.

backbencher:
Check my other posts on this thread, thank you

Seen. Nice. Respect.

Sad these kids have brought such misery to thier poor parents.

backbencher:
I wonder o.

No checking, no due diligence, not even allowing family to investigate.

Don't forget you criticise your fellow man for this extreme wickedness before looking for women to call out.

greenie77:
What other option(s) do you think she would have used to handle the situation?

Don't mind those guys. They're all over NL supporting aby rubbish a man does as if it adds to thier own masculinity. Maybe he was expecting the wife to wait till the end of the marriage before acting.

Wawelexy:
Lol... I like the fact that she placed the boy on his father's lap.... She was like, oya take your property....

The new bride was just dumbfounded... If I were to be the bride, I go just carry the boy and ask the pastor to continue the wedding..... After all, I don't know if that's the only child he has...... Life goes on.

But normal normal,that husband na badt guy, the Nigga just dey look them like, I no kuku kill person, na pikin I born....

But I no blame am sha, some marriage be like death sentence, those daughters of eve will be like, I have a kid for him now, he's going no where...

Any marriage that will choke u to death, my broda, never hesitate to run.... So we no go hear something like wife burst the scrotum of husband while sleeping.... Be wise

Imagine if it was a married woman trying to marry another man secretly. You guys would have dragged women to their grave on this thread. Now, it's a fellow man and not only are you shielding him from blames, you still found a way to attack the gender who is supposed to be a victim in this case. Are y'all really willing to throw away your integrity just to defend whatever a man does? Do you think it makes you any more of a man?

Sexism makes people look foolish.

Sirjendon:
This one trouser wey don wash finish, but, why dis guy kon resamble Carpenter.

Abi na only dey observe de thing

Carpentry is an honorable profession and carpenters don't look different from you and I.

Lotusgoddess:
Johny.
Please what's so difficult in this question?
Johny's father was stated clearly.

Lol... you could have just answered without trying to disparage the OP and others who couldn't get it right (assuming your answer is correct, that is). There's actually no proof Johnny is a male child. Not making such assumptions when answering questions might just be the IQ factor being checked here; you think?

suffering:
CNN reporters parade themselves as social justice warriors when they’re no less hypocritical than the next man. Good riddance.

Not really. I do not think they are parading themselves as anything. They're just doing their work as reporters. And if you're perceiving them as social justice warriors, then it means they're good at their job cause reporters work really hard to leave thier personal convictions behind while at work. That's basic reporting. It's not like they're supposed to come on screen to share what they do in thier personal lives.

tuzle:
I have a friend that I call big head sometimes, so will u call that bullying? What I am trying to say is that calling big head isn't an insult, it could even be a joke, although the child may take it as an insult. I was tall from my youth days and I have been called names like iroko, longitude and so on, will I count that as bullying? So refer to someone as big head isn't bullying to me.

I really can't believe you're actually comparing yourself and your friends with a kid with a budding sense of self. Constantly calling the kid "big head" before other kids could destroy his self esteem for life especially if that boy actually has a big head. Trust other kids to gladly adopt the appellation too.

You shouldn't lay emphasis on the words "big head", you should rather pay attention to the impact on the recipient, the context/surrounding circumstances, etc. You can't tell me there's nothing wrong with calling someone "olodo" simply because we sometimes call our friends "olodo"; that would be illogical. Kids like and need to be loved by their teachers, if that name isn't making him feel loved, just stop it. If he's not looking forward to being in school cause his teacher makes him feel like a misfit, address it. Don't joke with kids' self esteem.

Even as adults, it's extremely important to consider how our "jokes" are received before deciding whether to continue with them or not. It's not about what is bullying to you; it's definitely not about you. It's primarily about the recipients and thier vulnerabilities. Calling someone big head, skinny leg, etc. could be bullying cause most times, the only difference between jokes and insults is how they're received.

That said, I believe the guy could have just called the teacher aside to tell him or her how the child felt about it. The teacher would have probably understood and stopped calling him that without being humiliated.

Very sad.

Really, parenting is not easy. The truth is, we can tell our kids all we want (or even worse, flog them all we want), they'd still learn from our actions. How can we teach our kids to respect and be empathetic toward others if we, as adults, derive so much pleasure in bullying others too? The high rate of cyber bullying today suggests that many people still have the bullying desire in them but just can't act on it with reckless abandon anymore. There's no telling what these faceless people do or say to others when no one is watching.

My point is, our kids will reflect us, thier teachers and/or their friends. Seeing that thier teachers are adults and thier friends will reflect thier own parents who are adults too, I believe it's safe to say our actions are adults shape the personalities of our kids more than anything we could ever say to them. This invariably implies that raising good kids entails being the best versions of ourselves as adults. Parenting is indeed not easy.

Omniman:
What is going on here... Fill me in

I think there was a time male phones used to mate with female phones to beget new ones. History is wonderful, my brother.

Support thier car washing business.

I'd like to think you only have to walk into a bank and request that your address be changed. Normally, one should be able to do that online but I don't think Nigerian banks have that option.

Six packs loading...

Lol... in Nigeria, when people hâte someone, they hâte everything that comes from the person regardless of whether it's a good thing or not.

The same people that always say "in a sane country..." are the ones running down every little effort made to be like the so-called sane countries. Someone somewhere will always scream "misplaced priority" for every stride, and I wonder what thier understand of prioritization is. Prioritization is about relative importance and not necessarily a mandatory order of activities. An item with lower priority which can be achieved now should not be left on hold cause a higher priority item has not been achieved except the item with lower priority is likely to eat deep into the resources meant for the higher priority item. Constant power supply may have a higher priority than the automation of our legal system but it's not necessarily a perquisite. I'm not a fan of the Malami guy but this automation is long overdue and it's a welcome change if executed properly.

ValCon888:
Some women are not responsible enough to have kids talk more of adopting one.

I hope she doesn't auction the little girl to the highest bidder.

Wow... Some of y'all will never appreciate something good.

Doubleoh7:
They were not suspended from having sex but for moaning too much and disturbing the patients' ears. You sef Imagine being in pains on the hospital bed and hearing such sounds without video rights

You don't think having sex at one's workplace should be an offense?

Viraltrends123:
So, no big deal. It's acceptable in our traditions and religion, isn't it?

Lol... what is not allowed in your traditions and religions, pleasuring oneself or using a toy? Do your traditions and religions prefer cucumber? How sure are you you've got the same religion as the person you quoted? And who says what the traditions are?

Please, it's perfectly OK if such things don't appeal to you and I. We even can argue about the morality. But don't try to cage others with "our traditions and religions".

You can boldly ask this question here cause immorality on the man's side is considered as "nothing serious". Imagine the insults you'd have been getting if you were a lady. Yet, these same people that treat men's promiscuity with kid gloves are the ones calling out girls everyday on Nairaland for sleeping with married men. Shameful.

Let's blame women for our inability to cheat too. After all, we already blame them for everything else.

Standing at the foot of the building looking up made me feel dizzy. I can't imagine what it'd feel like looking down from the tip!

Does third-party in this case mean they're independent contractors (contract employees) or employees of a third-party firm outsourced to FMN?

Independent contractors don't get all the benefits that permanent staff members get (health insurance, bonuses, upscale training, promotion, etc.). This is the same everywhere. However, in many countries, they usually get a higher pay at the end of the salary cycle (primarily cause they have to file and pay their own taxes themselves). I don't really know why that's not the case in Nigeria.

And if they're employees of a third firm outsourced to FMN, they should probably take thier protest to thier respective employers. The employers can bill FMN more and/or increase thier pay.

adebayour26:
OP, you just dey catch cruise with this girl. I sure say you no go marry her.
Unfortunately, you are gradually spoiling the girl's punna for her future husband.

We all know that when you're done having fun with her, you'd just pick up a fight with her over something small and zoooommm off.

... and pick up another who has had her own fair share of "fun" for marriage. The idea that new is better is why a man would drop a girl he's seen at her lowest to settle with one he hardly knows. Same goes for ladies. Like I've always said, if you're having "fun", just know that your future partner is probably doing same.

Ammishaddai:
Some people just come up with fairytales and expect Nairalanders to believe hook,line and sinker.

And many Nairalanders actually believe them cause they're eager to hear stories that appeal to thier bias.

crestedaguiyi:
Na people wey dey hail you still make you dey jump for any thread seeking likes with your conspiracy

Lol... he created the thread.

Wonderboy01:
Instead make dis 1 face how his team go make top 4 na person wey don big pass him club him dey jealous .....

Grey hair a** coach

You're allowing bloggers control you. Where in his statement did you hear him mention Ronaldo? So saying Messi is his candidate based on technicality implies he's jealous of Ronaldo? Was Ronaldo the only other player nominated? Bloggers just pick people's statements and make mountains out of it.

Malory:
Don't mention their names or tribe. Say no to tribalism

Nice to see someone decrying tribalism on Nairaland. I wish someone would also be bold enough to say "don't mention thier gender" when it's a about a lady (seeing that no one mentions gender when it's about a man).