₦airaland Forum

GarfieldDenny:
In fact, women's nagging is a unique way to express intimacy. Women occasionally nag a few words, one is concerned about you, two is to want to attract your attention, remind you to ignore her. A mature man should know that the beloved woman suddenly becomes nagging, which is to alert you: she is upset, she is neglected, she needs your care, your coax, your love.

That's not true

Women naggs when things are not really going as expected

Once you do the needful, women will not nagg

They are not parrots

Happy989:
I started dating my boyfriend months ago and even before we started dating we've been good friends. He is intelligent, funny, has a great personality and takes good care of me. When he asked me to be his girlfriend I was so happy, because he is such a great guy. My boyfriend is in his final year in the same university that I attend. I'm still in my second year.

There is this guy in my department who is very good looking and also intelligent. He isn't jovial and extroverted like my boyfriend, but he is cool in a very confident and attractive kind of way. We started talking recently and he told me he finds me attractive. I told him that I have a boyfriend and he didn't seem fazed and never talked about the subject of my relationship. He still complimented my body and looks from time to time even though I didn't respond to his compliments in a way that indicated that I was in support of his actions.

During this covid-19 break we began talking more often over the phone and through texts and I always found our conversations interesting. A lot of times we'd talk till midnight. He is very witty and creative with words and I always smile whenever I see his texts or receive his calls.

Few weeks ago we talked about sexual fetishes and I realized we both had similar fetishes. This made him even more interesting because I found myself able to talk about stuff I hadn't talked about with anyone before, not even my boyfriend. This guy is not like anyone I've ever met before. His views on life are very unique and original and his personality is so complex and his sexuality is very intriguing.

The problem now is that I am beginning to develop strong feelings for this guy. When he calls me on the phone I don't wish the call to end. I find myself talking to him for minutes not minding the time. He is beginning to occupy my thoughts a lot and I don't know what to do. I still love my boyfriend but there is something about this guy that just seems to draw me to him.

I don't want to do anything that will break my boyfriend's heart.

It's left for you to know if you can keep both or one

And if you are keeping one, make sure you make the right choice so that you don't look for another

Good news for them, not ours that we can no longer understand

Shenseaa:
How come. He should have enough for that

Why are you reasoning like this

Have you been following his case for you to reason that way

If only Boko Haram Idiots will attend this school and stop causing wahala for the nation

falcon01:
I don't get it.

Modified

adoreyou:
Could the present punishment for rapists according to our law be enough to deter others. What do you think should be the ideal punishment for a rapist by your standard?As for me nothing can give assurance of eradicating rapists aside life imprisonment.

Castration let them become eunuchs for life

Iwilldiesoon:
When the beating got to a point,i had to voice out and fight back in which i said some words like
"is it because of your wife"
Give me money am going back to my mums family"

The woman heard and packed out with all her kids

I felt remorse and pity for my dad,
I couldnt look at him
It was like i caused him to lose a gem

Pls NL how do i get this woman back to dady
Am in tears now cause my dad is old and not really healthy and that woman has helped a lot

Thanks

Locate the woman wherever she may be and beg her to come back home that you don't have any bad feelings about her and her children

In her presence if she cones back, apologies to dad that his happiness is your priority

If you are lucky she comes be, my dear give them a long rope and avoid visiting them

You can give them a call but avoid them and don't talk about them with any one before you will be misquoted

tuzle:
My 10 years old cousin alway makes weird sound when sleeping. Sometimes he sounds like he is in pain or talks in his dream and if u wake him up he will tell u he can't remember his dream. I want to find out if it this is a medical condition or something else, because he does this every night and it is disturbing. Also he comes from a troubled home.

If he is too playfull during the day, then attributes it to it

Reduce his playing time by committing him to reading and watching cartoons

Harddie123:
Hello everyone,am confused and I need mature advise, concerning the rape matter going on, I received the shock of my life when my cousin opened up to me that she was raped wen she was in primary one 2009/2010 and that was ten years back. The issues is that the boy that raped her was in primary 5 then bt fully grown up now and my sis is also 17. Pls I need mature advise on wat to do on this matter. Admin pls push to front page

At this stage, it's too late to make it a case but she should distance herself from that idiot of a guy

Notyamate:
There is this woman in my compound who is a widow. She moved in with her two children some months after her husband demise. Although I don't really know her story but I heard her mother-in-law (husband mother) chased her and the children out of their house in the notion that she killed her son.


Since she moved in this woman and her two children have been living from hand to mouth. Her first born, a 19 years old boy was given admission to Fuoye last year and it was a miracle he didn't missed the deadline for tuition payment. Before his admission this boy has been working as a salesboy so he was able to contribute some money towards his tuition, also with the help of his boss and some other good Samaritans.


When this boy told his father's family about his admission, they were just making promises upon promises and in the end none of them contribute a dime to his admission.


This Corona period has been hard for them as this woman couldn't go to work, she works as a food seller in a secondary school. Her 16 years old daughter wrote UTME this year. The girl has been working at a filling station to help her mother during this lockdown.


Few days ago someone told this woman that her husband's family have been selling his properties, that some days ago they sold a landed property worth 500,000 and have shared the money among themselves. And to think this woman has been sitting at home for almost three months without a kobo in her account and here are the families selling her dead husband's properties without her knowledge.


This woman is a very nice person. In fact, she's one of the nicest person I've ever met and I still don't understand why her husband's families are treating her like this.


Some of our neighbors here are trying to get a lawyer for her but she's scared these people are going to harm her children (spiritually).

She should report their cases to God and those involved will receive their punishment live on earth

suco01:
yes. If it has fault they will now convert it to the one we know which is using external condenser.

Then it doesn't worth it

Missy30:
Hello
I decided to open a new account because I don't want my identity to be out there.

I am going to be 29 this year and I can say the last time I fell in love or have butterflies in my tummies towards the opposite sex was 10yrs ago. I don't fall in love easily, I would rather spend my time at work or calculate how to make more money, yes, I love sex, I can deceive a guy into a relationship but once we have sex, all that emotional yen yen yen feelings disappear fiaamm, I have tried to go into a relationship with 2 responsible naira landers but I just don't know how to love, my heart is cold, all I want is sex,after sex, I hate the guy like shit. My parents are on my neck to get married, but I don't want to because I might frustrate that innocent guy. Yes, I was raped when I was 10,but I still had relationships with 2 guys and I felt like I was in heaven,I am way over that rape abeg, God pls help me, I just want to know how it feels to be in love again even though Bobo will be break my heart , I don't mind. Or am I suffering from a medical condition

Nothing is actually wrong with you, it's your mind set that is playing games with your head

Your rape experience is not responsible for your attitude

The major thing is you as a person

You must learn to love else you will live alone on the surface of this earth

If you don't love then you can't love your biological child talk less of your neighbours child

You are hustling to make money fine, but let it not be affecting you

You love sex and you lure a me to sex you and that's the end, in that case you must have a register to keep records of men

You being a woman makes it worst as very soon you will be lonely and fed up with life

Change your perception about men and start loving

Even if you marry, if you don't change your mind set your marriage will just be an attempted marriage

Meaning it will not survive

If you know how you brought that silly idea to your brain, take it out pls

Romangalactic:
Have you ever suspected that other Nairalanders, friends, colleagues, acquaintances, and even close family members are blindsided by the sheer strength of your personality?
If you are the kind of person who knows their own mind and doesn’t believe in following the herd, other people might find you somewhat intimidating!

Do any of these signs sound familiar? If so, you probably earn the respect of others but you will also get on the bad side of an equal number of people.

These are the signs to look out for:




Is an intimidating personality a blessing or a curse?

Sometimes, you might scare away potential friends and partners just by being yourself. On the other hand, those brave enough to stick around and get to know you will come to appreciate your intelligence, honesty, and unique perspective on the world.
Because you are willing to meet lots of new people there’s a good chance that you will find your tribe sooner or later, there are always people who are capable of keeping up with your incredible mind.

Embrace your intimidating personality!

This is absolutely true, people get intimidated when they discover that you are resilient and you have a way of remaining focused despite their troubles and distraction

Havemercylord:
Hello nairalanders!!!
No need to ask for help as the world itself needs help and no one is even willing READY to help rather to blame and make jest for ones misfortune...

I loved to experience death, as in I just want to leave you this world silently and quietly.

If I even see a sure means to get myself used for my family and generations so they can be forever wealthy till generations to come...but it might not be possible....

It's well sha

You are not allowed to fraternize with the devil

Just go close to God and he will see you through

If you need a painless death then you are afraid of the pains you would have gone into to just die

Be strong and pull yourself together

Talk to some one today and you will get relieved

suco01:
There is reason they are doing an inbuilt compressor and the reason are online aside considering weather condition.

The same way most phones brands do their battery as inbuilt.

If that's the case then they don't want another to repair them when they develop faults on the repair and maintenance services of such industry can do that

Then it's not region for Nigeria

obalolaunited:
Hi nairalander
My baby is the quiet type that doesn't disturb or cry often except those weeks of immunization. But these days she cry out from sleep and then go back to sleep this scares me alot..is this normal?

Children plays while dreaming

At times they smile while sleeping and at times they cry out while sleeping

To me the best is to sleep such a child with his stomach on the bed and he can fave left or right

It even helps them sleep longer

LawBreaker:
Is it a good idea to take a child to a motherless babies home to raise the child for you and when she is of age, you will come and take the child.

What is your reasons behind that

So if you do for the first then you may likely do for the rest

If you can't stand raising your own biological child, what's the essence of pregnanting a woman

Just give your reasons

Emmaskill:
I followed this my guy to his village to see his parents but as we reached there around 6:30pm their was many people in there compound I asked him whether they have a ceremony he said no that it is because of me. Around 11:30 pm he woke me up and told me that something will come to greet me and I should not fear, I thought that he made a mistake and I asked him something or somebody and he repeated it SOMETHING. Fear entered me immediately because I don't know anyplace there and I don't no what will come.
He is with me inside the room. Before some seconds I looked and imagine what I saw it was a very PYTON, ( snake) entering the room through door I shouted and he told me to relax. For me it was like to vainsh.
The PYTON enter and goes round him two times and came to my own Side and did the same thing and left. As it left he ran out side and gun shoot and music started. That day what I saw pass my power I no fit talk, I no fit cry.
So the next day i asked him the meaning and he told me that he is very happy that their family SHRINE has accepted me to be his wife. I did not argue with him in the village but back to the city I told him that am no longer interested and he should never come close or call my number again in life.
The problem now is that he told me that any person that their shrine have accepted can not say no or problems will follow the person. He told me to go back to their family so that they can cancel it but I don't want to go.
How do I handle This

Hahaha

In the real sense, he is supposed to tell you part of their culture

Anyway I don't believe that aspect of their gods have accepted you

He can't tell me that there are no divorced home in his kindred or community

You need clarification on this from elders of his village, may be you have to inform your parents and they can do that by taking a trip

But I hate the fact that he didn't properly tell you before hand

To me I think the python came to visit as usual and does that to strangers who came in with good heart

Ekez:
Nairalanders can you get married to a girl who cannot cook and not ready to learn.
I was discusing with one of ma female friend recently ,she said if her husband to be cannote hire a cook he should forget getting married to her.

verdict: i can never do that.

lalastilala xup

You already heard her, so it's either you get a cook or you drop her

fineboynl:
please help.

I bought some yams last week here.

they look fresh and very expensive.

only for me to check them today. and find some are getting rotten. do you believe I wasted half of the yam when cutting off the spoilt parts.

how do o store them. especially the once I already peeled off.

can it be stored on freezer?

If you have constant light, boil the peeled ones and refrigerate

Then for the other ones, pls dash few out to the less privileged

Any time from March / April, you don't store yam because the water in it have dried up and can't survive the weather

Just buy one or two tubbers of yam till July/ August when the new ones will be out

I am not trying to discourage you but for him to be forty and still in this mess shows that he may remain so for the rest of his life

I wish you guys can afford to go to psychiatric hospital in Yaba and make enquiries on how and what it will take to rehabilitate him

But in the absence of that, he may commit a crime that will keep him in jail and he will be off it

falcon01:
Make him drink and drink and drink till he can drink no more Life is too short to worry about His problem.

And you think he doesn't have any problems at all

bigl:
Of course, you are right but with experience, they don't work.

My neigbour uses LG 200litre deep freezer with the so called "inbuilt condenser cooler" but she's always having issues cos not external cooling fins.

I want to believe the ones without external cooling fins (passive cooling) are not built for Nigeria. U know weather is always hot!

That's true

Leshurr:
Right from childhood my mother has always been very toxic, negative and unsupportive towards me and my elder sister. We were the only two kids she ever had with my father and their marriage packed up because he wasn't happy with the fact that she didn't bear him a son. I get the impression that she secretly resents us for being girls and that's why she treats us terribly.

I got married 7 years ago and had a daughter shortly after.. when I did the scan and we found that it's a girl, my mother drove all the way to my house and laid hands on my tummy declaring and demanding that the gender must be transformed to a boy in Jesus name. I was so upset and humiliated as she did this in the presence of my husband. Of course her prayers didn't work and I gave birth to a girl - and I've recieved little to no support from her in the raising of my daughter.

Now fast-forward to this pregnancy, from day one when I told my mother I had concieved again, she showed no enthusiasm and simply said "it better be a boy this time"..

I felt so sad and dejected, and so worried of the amount of criticism i would get from my mother.. coupled with the fear of my husband being unhappy if it turns out to be another girl.. so when it was time, I went to do the gender scan alone.. lo and behold, the doctor told me it's another girl.. my world shattered and I spent the rest of the day just driving around town crying... whilst my mother kept blowing up my phone throughout the day to find out the gender but I ignored her calls. When I got home my husband asked me the gender and I lied and said it wasn't clear. He suggested we do another scan but I kept avoiding it.

Till date I'm the only one who knows the gender and I'm due in two weeks. My mother still keeps calling pressuring me that I must deliver a boy this time.

I'm so depressed and haven't been motivated to do any baby shopping.. I just feel like I'd be felt sorry for by my friends and will be ridiculed by my mother if this child does turn out to be another girl.

You ought to be strong my dear

Your mother is a case and you have to stop giving her the audience she is getting from you and your family

You as a woman is not responsible for the gender of your child but your husband chromosomes are responsible for it

Pls relax yourself before it becomes complicated

Leave your husband to accept things the way it is and God will surely grant your heart desires

Stop expecting hope or any thing from your mother she is not a determinant factor of your life

Some women are looking for that child and going hell to get there

Be grateful to God for his pregnancies in your life

Once again, starts keeping some things away from your mother

She is not a friend to count on

uboma:
Amen.

Imagine the lies he/she cooked up just to deceive others.

That's enhhh

jaszplus12:
Here's a true story.
A man sees a lady, he tells her he wants his son to marry her. Soon the son comes and they're introduced. He likes her. She goes for national service, he meets her there, they agree to marry.
8 years gone into married life, she's unhappy.
She's not pregnant
He's not showing concern
She's trying always to seduce him enough to keep them sexually connected, he's not impressed. He blames tiredness, too much work at the office...
Despite her attempts to make more time for sex, his libido is under par!
....and hers is growing....
Then I ponder...why punish a woman when you know you don't want sex often?
When engage in marriage when you know your sexual capacity is low...
Do you think a woman should endure just because you can??
What motives has a man when he's thinking about getting married knowing this about himself
Can someone offer an insight to this??
What can and should change? Should the man improve on his libido...or woman should decrease hers?
And how can either be achieved
A marriage needs help here! The floor is open....

How can a woman decrease her libido, is she the one propelling it

Let them go their separate ways let her go for another man and let the man go out and treat himself

Sex is important on marriage as food is important to the stomach

daboy18:
Sorry I created this account because I have been following this forum as a guest. Something has been bothering me. I am a boy of 18 yers last year I travelled from ekiti to Abuja to visit my uncle it was my first time to go to Abuja , I was very excited and couldn’t wait to see the place myself because I was getting jealous of my parents and older siblings talking about the place after visiting my uncle. My uncle was aware of my arrival because he paid for my transport fare. On my way to his place we was chatting via Facebook messenger he told me that he was busy at work and he will be home late but his wife and kids are at home they will take care of me . After a long journey i
Arrive safely to his house it was around 7 in the evening , I knocked and a man came a security guy , I introduced myself but the guy refuse to allow me to go inside. He locked me out, i taught maybe I was in the wrong house but when I took my diary to check the address again and it was correct , I just don’t know why he refuse to allow me inside , I don’t know if it was his wife who told him not to , I was confuse , I was tired , hungry my last meal was 2 in the afternoon and desperately needed to use toilet my head was spinning and hurting me bad . My phone was dead low battery and I couldn’t call my uncle to inform him of what was happening , I was in tears because I didn’t know what else to do , in a big city like Abuja and the only people I knows abandon me. Because it was dark and people were not passing around , i desperately needed toilet I had to pee outside there compound and I sat there with my luggage for almost long time then the guy came again and opened the door and ask me to follow him. He took me inside the house where my uncle’s wife and another wife I didn’t know who she was were watching tv , I greeted them and his wife said why I can’t I phone her to let her know that I was outside , I explained that my battery was dead but she wasn’t interested , she then asked her maid to show me the room and the bathroom so I could have my bath. I was very angry my entire body was shaking , I wanted to ask her if I could eat first but I was shy to ask and I went and had my bath and all I could think of was foods. I taught after my bath I will go downstairs and my food will be ready of which I went downstairs to eat and my uncle was also back , I greeted him then he went to have his bath while the maid was preparing food for me , I taught it was for both of us but I was wrong, few mins later his wife told me to go sleep because I had a long tiring day I should rest. I obeyed but deep in me I was like how could this woman be this wicked , first of al she locked me outside for 2 hours and again she deprived me of food , i was in tears again I am a boy but I very emotional, I cry anytime I am pained . I went to bed angry something I never did before even taught my parents are not rich but we never sleep angry. I cried a lot that night I soaked my pillow with tears and I just couldn’t wait for sun to come so I could eat. In the morning I woke up very early but I had to wait for my cousins to wake so we could all eat together and we had a great breakfast together with both parents but what I noticed for one week I had spend with them is his wife only treated me well when my uncle was around and when is not around is hell. She wouldn’t let me eat in the same table with her kids or touched her children PlayStation games , she will keep my cousins away from me , I will be all alone but I have never told my uncle anything because I don’t want to cause problems. Till now I have also never had told my parents about what his wife did to me. My mum is a no nonsense woman if I told her she would have go all the way to Abuja to fight her so I decided to keep it to myself. The issue on ground is my mum want my 14 years old little sister to go and live with my uncle so my uncle could train her but I don’t like the idea because his wife will abuse her the same way she did with me , mine was only for a week it was hell and what about my sister who will be with them for years , I am scared that She will die of anger and I will not see her again but I don’t know how to tell my mum not to send her because if I said what happened to me there , it will cause a lot of trouble because my mum will revenge . I just don’t know what to tell her or should I let her go and wait for her to speak for herself when she will start abusing her. What should I do please

First of all you have to work on your emotions before you get your stability as a man

Seat your parents down and let them know what you pass through and because of that, you can never allow your junior sister to go their and start living with them

Tell them especially your mother that you don't want problems with what you just said and you only told them for them to be aware of what to expect

Your uncle can assist in training your sister from wherever she is, so keep your sister and let your uncle contribute to her education

If she goes there she will remain a slave and may loose her sanity because she wouldn't expect that from them

You guys have to avoid anything that will bring family misunderstanding that will last forever

Warn your mother seriously pls

gentlekay2017:
I'm not new to nairaland but I decided to join today because of my present dilemma. Kindly assist me my people, I need sound advice. I met Cynthia last year, precisely July 27 at a friend's wedding in Ibadan, Oyo State. Very beautiful, amiable and well educated. I have a serious issue against Cynthia, I am a struggling civil servant and investor. I'm presently investing my meagre salary of less than 90k monthly on a livestock feed milling and feed sales business. I'm an animal scientist by training and if well managed, feed milling business can become very prosperous in few years. I am jealously guarding the investment to the extent that I decided to deny myself of pleasures for now. The only vehicle I drive is an old model Hilux which I also use for the business. It was donated to me as near scrap by my former employer who relocated to US with his family in 2017. It was this my employer who was running the business before he sold everything and moved to US. I couldn't raise the money needed to buy some of his equipment and rent the warehouse he was using then, therefore I had to start mine from a makeshift warehouse which I'm now building up gradually. The business isn't doing badly even though it requires a huge capital which I don't have, therefore, I'm seriously bidding my time, doing cooperative, ajo and all those stuffs. My intention is to get married later this year or early next year. I am 34 going to 35 by October. I really need an understanding young lady who will grow with me. Cynthia started making frivolous financial demands since December last year. Money for her rent, hairdo, travels, new phones, birthday bash, this and that. I'm already tired about her frequent pestering and nagging each time I can't meet her demands. She works as a contract staff in a bank with very meagre salary. I tried to augment her salary but she didn't really see reason why she can't live big now. I have sat her down to explain things to her in details more than 10 times but she often come around with the same problem, money. I must confess that Cynthia is very beautiful, courteous and presentable. My mother and 3 sisters loves her so much. It's like she doesn't believe in my dreams and aspirations which I'm sure will definitely lead us to a very prosperous life in few years. I've stopped picking her calls for two weeks now, she came around to the feedmill today to ask about her offence and I didn't mince words in telling her that my goals and aspirations are so paramount to me for now and since she's not interested in it, I'm taking my time to re-access the relationship with a view to determining whether I'm going on with her or not. She left dejected without uttering a word.
I got home from work to begin to think deeply if I'm not wrong with my decision.
Please advise me, I'm confused.

You did perfectly well by telling her your mind straight away

For now you have to take a break and let the relationship fizzle out

She is beautiful and the rest, but with her demands, you can't have a savings

Beauty have never made a marriage work but being prudent and financially economic wise have made so many marriages to survive

Think of how to look for someone that will have the same dream and aspirations like you

missdivineprove:
Sending my love and hug to all those going through any emmotional challenges due to rape. May we find justice and healing.

Now, to my question.

Why is it that when a boy child (male) is rape, the parents keep quiet. The society in general wouldn't take it serious, but when a girl child (female) encountered the same thing, the whole world stand up for it?
Does it mean men are not victims of rape?
If there are, why are they not voicing out?
Does it mean women are meant to be taken serious in the case of rape than the men? And why?
Are men traumatized as well in rape cases?
Do you think the society is not being fair here?
What's your view on this?

Tyr not to compare a woman's situation to that of a man in any given circumstances

The presence and availability of money in marriages is far better than the absence

DontBullshitMe:
Women are in marriage for money.

Stop that mind set