₦airaland Forum

Pablo9090:
Good day my fellow Nairalanders!!!, I will be brief and precise to the situation . It all started 19yrs ago, when my father chased my mother away and married another woman , I am the first born and I already have three other siblings , now we are ten , the second wife gave birth to six and she is still pregnant. My dad was financially buoyant to cater for the family because he deals on drugs and due to high demand money flows in but in the last six years things have changed especially when he had problem with Nafdac people , he was banned from selling drugs and he switched to motor parts business which is not as lucrative as drug business. Seeing d situation of things and having known first hand experience of bboth business , I choosed the drug business, since two years now I am doing well but my father usually gives me unnecessary expenses which am not comfortable with , I cater for my younger sisters in school to him it is not enough , he wants me to sponsor my step mum children too citing that am the first born and it is my responsibility , I am really confused , am yet to start my own family and this man is here giving me headache like as if I was the one that brought my step siblings to this world , please if you are in my shoes what will you do ? Please moderators take it to the front page

This is very simple

Get married as soon as possible and start having your own children, instead is training those that are not your biological

Secondly concentrate on your own siblings and still love your steps

Lastly plan, my brother plan, if you don't plan you may end up training those children he is breeding and that's it

Your dad wants to influence you towards your steps, he will soon get old and thats when you will know how far

kanmie:
As a husband you get home and find your wife sleeping next to this. What would you do?

That means you have failed her from a very simple and natural task that you should have performed with greater satisfaction

Ginaz:
good morning everyone.

I intend to visit the sick and old at the hospital to do charity work. but I'm confused on what to buy for them. my mom said I should get them tea, do old people take eat at their old age ? lol. my mom is so funny .

pls I need Ideals and I have no glue on what to buy. abeg my nairaland family , oya give me ideals biko.

Dash them money and fruits they know what to buy with their money

[quote author=MommaD post=109437481][/quote]Your fear is not even upto the shame that you are still living with your parents despite the fact that you are married

If your dear is that, your husband will not pack in with you, then your children comfort is not a priority to you

If you know that you can afford the cost of running your home without expecting much from hubby, get an apartment, if he wants he will pack in with you

Pay, then inform him and his family, if they ask you why, tell them you needed some privacy and will still keep in touch with them

If he doesn't want to follow you, leave him, probably he has no future plans than to depend on his family

Prospertochu:
I am married with three kids 2 years and 3 months triplets , my salary is 55k i used to give my wife 20k mother 10k , 5k for rainy days and 20k for myself transportation and other expenses outside my house. My wife complained that the money was not enough I added 5k making it 25k monthly but she still demanding for more money and she has threatened to leave if I don't give her more , I had no money to give her my own mother was homeless staying in church and I couldn't stop giving her that 10k because she needed it . My wife used to fought me every single day and my uncle asked us to leave the family house hearse we were disturbing their peace and I was ready to let her go and I will be sending 25k for our triplets upkeep every month but for the sake of our kids we have settled down with 30k monthly leaving me with 15k , so far we have moved out of the family house, we are staying in a parlour and room house a brother from Canada gave us the place it is not permanent but it is better and we are very very grateful. Like I said earlier my mother was staying in church now we have a one bedroom house I have discussed with my wife for my mum to come and live with us and I will stop the 10k I was giving her and I will add it to her money making it 40k monthly she have agreed. Now that my mother is here with us she started again with the 40k is not enough to feed all of us note I dobt eat breakfast I eat lunch at work and in the evening at eat at home , she is only giving my mother foods in the evening while she and my kids eat 3 Square meal a day. I asked her why she is treating my mother so badly she said the economy is hard if she doesn't have she won't kill herself. I am sick and tired and if I have sorted things it was for the sake of our kids and now I am starting to regret. I am thinking from this month when I get my salary I will give her 30k and give my mother 10k to be cooking her own foods. It is my decision good?

This is just am embarrassment

Just don't allow her to push you to stealing

If she thinks going out of your house is the best option for her, leave her let her go

Whatever you have keep sending

Her mates are helping her husband and she is there traumatising you

ChiomaCa:
Hello everyone, I'm in need of an advice, I got married to a man 5yrs+ ago. He relocated some months after marriage to Canada, I went to meet him 2 years after. And we had a baby 10months after my arrival. Immediately I arrived his place, I noticed he flirt alot onlline, Sex chats, Video sex chats, Visit porn sites, visit Prostitue Sites, and the rest. I caught him red-handed twice and he begged and pleaded not to do such again. I forgive him and I believe maybe because of the distance we had in two years.

We move on and I promise myself not to even go near his Laptop or mobile phone anymore.

I adhered to that for more than a year, which I'm still doing that till December 23 of 2021.

My daughter threw his I-watch inside water. Then I picked it up to drain for some minutes, after I drianed, I realised a message popped up , which Read " Do you enjoy me yesterday Do I book you for tomorrow again"

I was forced to check what's this. I saw hell. In short, he visited two different Prostitues in a hotel to book 30 minutes session with them for $160 and $220, I also saw other messages asking for Anal sex from these Escorts. I realised, he visited them 3rd, 1st 22nd of December. During these period, I was the one begging him for sex. He said he's not interested that he's Fixed with many activities and Shifts at work.

I was in the house hopping my husband as gone to work, not knowing he's doing something else within his short break and free time.

Immediately I saw this, I was devastated,I was mad at my self. We are very religious. Why all these for God sake, this is the 3rd time, what have I done to myself, have made a wrong choice?

I called his brother back in Nigeria and I inform and sent all what I saw to him, he called and talked to him, the next day, my husband came to me, apologize and promised not to do that again. I accept and forgive him.

Few days ago, I have been having this kind of feeling, I feel like I'm not beutiful because why will my husband prefer a Prostitue than me.

I hate myself, I think about it every minutes, whenever I see him, my mind keep breathing fast. I'm sad and I'm not happy, I don't know what to do.

I can't discuss with my parents, because they see my husband as the most religious person.

He doesn't talk much, keep friends nor drink.

I need advice dear mummy and daddy please is this a red light?

You don't have to be shocked at what you came across in him

Keep talking to him and keep advising him until he drops those dirty habits

Don't ever give up, you are beautiful and you will always be, he has been living that kind of life before your arrival and he can't stop it over night

Rachel98:
Good morning everyone. Hope we're having a wonderful week.

My Elder brother is doing well, no doubt he's the breadwinner in our family But his wife is so rude, too authoritative, she's full of pride and she looks down on people. She see everyone as her employee, she does not care if her actions or words hurts you, she's quick to slap at any slightest provocation. She's an event planner, please are event planners this rude??

She's the main reason why we barely visit our brother, despite we all live in the same city, we feel like a total stranger in our brother's house. Probably she's using "jazz" on him, I don't know But everything she does seems cool to him.

I managed to spend the weekend with them, since on friday she act like my presence irritates her. The maid prepared semo and vegetable soup, i don't eat swallow that like, so she saw me cooking noodles, she rudely said why're you not eating semo? Why are you people so selective? Then she left the kitchen. I just maintained my cool.

Yesterday she slapped her maid just because the plantain she told her to fry wasn't brown enough (maybe she wanted burnt sacrifice plantain). My elder brother calmly said honey you shouldn't have slapped her just becus of plaintain. The next she told my brother was "Defender!! go and marry her nw"

This morning, I jejely packed my belongings on my way to work, I entered my brother's car so he can drop me at the bus-stop, I just told him I won't be coming to his place anymore, once I'm done with work today I'm going home straight. And the annoying part, he would be asking me why? As if he's blind, he can't see how rude and ill-mannered his wife is.

His wife has really separated my brother from us, his own family. We don't even know what to do.

That's to show you that your brother have been enduring shit from her

You guys should distance her that's just what she wants

christistruth01:
Obi Cubana is doing damage Control

The boy is better off avoiding Cubana

Nigeria is full of Ritualists

God will give him better alteratives

Is this came way you reason that has made you to be stagnant

What's your problem, if you can't appreciate luck why not keep quiet
Get out

Giftlove11:
I was being blinded by love to the extent that my boyfriend and I took a blood covenant, that was about some years ago..

The truth is that I was so madly in love with him, and when he brought out the ideal, I thought that was the only way he will be mine forever. So I agreed with him, and we made the convenant.. We use needle to cut out blood from our thumb, and we made a vow never to live each other or make love with another person..

i've been discussing with him to end this convenant, but he always refuses. We took the convenant when i was 17yrs, and Its been 8years now, and i've loved only him. Even though i don't love him again, i'm afraid to have or make love with another person.
he say we can't end it and that we must mary each other.

I already found someone else i love, i'm planning to report him to the police or his parents if he dosn't give me a chance to go away..

*i don't kno if it will actually hurt me if i love another person.

i really want to go away from him

Police has no business with the above case

His family may not be able to do anything

I think you have to go for deliverance to places like MFM prayer City at IBAFO and open up to God, he knows you did it out of ignorance and now you don't WANT it again

Our sins are, only forgiven by God not man

Though you did not state the reasons why you guys waited this long or what really made you to stop loving him

After you have done your deliverance, call him and tell him that you have gone to do your reconciliations with God and he should do same

Make sure you don't go back to him for anything sex but you can keep casual relationship

Painandgain:
This woman is above forty na

She too she knows, that's why she said officially

Maks27:
So I had this Local dog I love very well, I feed her all the time.

She eats whenever eat. She is so fresh unless you take a close look you won't know it's a local dog.

But during the Christmas holiday I travelled, by the time I came back my precious dog doesn't stay In our apartment again, she now spends all her time at our neighbors, if I call her and my neighbors call her at the same time she will answer them first.

This dog has completely forgotten about me. Sometimes I will go pick her up there feed her and before I look again she has returned to our neighbors house.

So I ask my dad what could have happened and he told me they beat her when I travelled because she dog a hole in the backyard.
Please how do I draw my dog back to me
Please help me I don't want to loose her.

The dog still loves you and recognize you but because of the beating he received when you were not around, it's has scared him

So you have to involve everyone to love the dog and once that is done, you she will trust you guys again

Every living thing wants care and love

stampo:
Good morning fellow Nairalanders.
This is real matters that needs your advice..

A very close friend of mine has found himself in a confused state and will need best advice on how to handle a critical situation.

This guy is already planning to get married with his girlfriend later this year ...plans going on.
During the last holidays, he ran into his ex girlfriend after a long while, they exchanged number and he invited her over to have a drink then hang out somewhere.

During the course of the meeting one thing lead to another they had sex...this happened 2 months ago.

My friend just got a call from the ex girlfriend that she missed her period and she is pregnant for him..
My friend was like trying to explain to her that he is get married in few months time and has no plans for her as regards marriage.

The ex girlfriend says she is keeping the pregnancy that my friend should do what ever he feels
The issue now how can he tell his girlfriend and parents about it.

Should he stop the planning of the wedding or should he continue with the ex girlfriend ?.

Please your advice on this issue is needed.

He has already disgraced himself before his new wife to be, so he should just inform her and watch her reactions

If she can bear the pains she will go ahead with the marriage while the other lady keeps her pregnancy

Is she can't bear the pains, she may decide to walk out and he has no option than to go ahead and marry the pregnant one

He should deal with anyone that comes up

Biggcowhorn:
My name is Kalu from Imo state but I live with my parents in Lagos. I'm a 37 year old jambite. Of recent I've been having feelings for this Igbo girl I met while attending my jamb classes, she's very brilliant, she's a nerd and I also observed she's an introvert.
I've open up to her to let her know my intentions of being in a relationship with her but she says I'm too old for her and she sees me as an uncle and elderly brother.
I recently invited her to my home when my mummy Left for work but she refused coming.
Nairalanders pls advise me by telling me on the best strategy I should use and how I should convince her to accept me as her boyfriend cos I'm dying for her.
No insults please as I need only matured comments

I pity you

Lamanii22:
I always apologize first even when I'm not wrong just for peace to reign... Amongst my friends, siblings and the likes.... Now that I am married I still do it too... So I would like to know if it's a good thing or I should not apologize first sometimes....


I am not a coward or anything I just like everything and everywhere peaceful......

You can't run away from troubles, so if you realy want peace all the time even when it's not your fault, keep apologising

But don't make yourself a mumu button

OneCorner:
Stumbled on this pic on WhatsApp and I still can’t wrap my head around it
Like wth is

They should be prepared

KOPArespect:
I will try to cut the long story short... I am 29. my wife is 26

I got married in 2018 and ever since, there is hardly a week that my mother-in-law
will not come visiting without my pre informing me. I hate this as i usually result into
sleeping on the couch since i was not financially bouyant to get an apartment then...
we were staying in my fathers house.

This act continued for long that i had to react by telling my wife that she should at least always
inform me whenever her mum is coming , and each time she inform me, I usually pass the night at
a friends place and the woman eventually noticed it. One day, she came, i prostrated to greet, she
answered and started accusing me of not calling her, that she is not here to meet me, she only wants
to come and greet her daughter.

ever since that day, my everyday plan was relocating to another state, as such, i started applying for
jobs outside my state...

Good enough, i got a job in Osun State and had to relocate there with my wife. for about 1 and 7 months
now, they've been communicating on phone and i only call her to ask if they've seen my alert on every festive
periods.

The issue right now is that my wife is heavily pregnant and my business mother MIGHT not want
to come stay with us for long abandoning her business... And i am very sure my mother-in-law will want to come.
coming is not my problem, how long will she stay is my issue, what if she didnt leave after 1,2,3 months?

i am planning of sending my wife to my mum for better care, but i dont want to miss my wife too... please advice, what should i do?

You have tried

If you want to send your wife to your mum to look after, that's a good idea

Just tell your that you want her to be with your mum so that she can look after her, so far you know that your wife and your mum have a good relationship

She may tell you she prefer her mum's place, tell her that you are not financially stable and if things you can do is done by your mum, you won't feel bad about it

That her mum is free to come over and visit her their

Just stand on your ground at this first instance so that your mother inlaw will have no option than to go and greet her daughter there

Ebije1:
which kind mama be dat one?

She knows what she is doing, she has Indirectly given out the child since she can't care or provide for her

kenzysmith:
This woman know what marriage really stand for marriage is for better or worse

Yes, for better for worst and for grave

That's her business

omron:
Good morning nairalanders

A friend of mine called me 4 days ago that he received a text message from a strange number the message goes thus:

"You have been hiding and running this 2022 anywhere you are we will get you and we will shoot you and also gun you down try don't forget this word this date 10th Jan 2022...You can not hide till we get you. We will show u that to get money is not easy."

Immediately he got the message about 30 minutes after he received a WhatsApp text from another strange different number a lady sending him pictures of her trying to lure him into a business and for friendship please what should he do?

This my friend is an online business man and when I asked him he said he never had a deal with anyone involving money .

Pls.what should he do


He needs advise thanks

Your friend knows alot, ask him to open up

So that he won't be killed for a small deal amount gone wrong

Zealoy:
Hi Nlanders, theres this girl i dated for 2yrs +, she loves me so much infact am her everything even the air she breath this girl has been there for me through everything she has been my back bone shes the type of girl that understand me perfectly but the thing is that all this while i've never really showed her love infact i neglect her so much that i dont even care for her, i nag at her and called her all sort of names at any given chance, i treated her so badly and disrespect her alot, we had a fight last year December on d 20th precisely and she moved out of my house and stop calling me or pick my calls.

Ever since then ive not been myself i never really knew i loved her this much i misses her everyday even as i type this am still having tears in my eyes, i just can't stop thinking about her. Pls guys what should i do? Should i just forget about her and move on? Which honestly i dont think i can find someone else like her again in this world.
Note: she has asked me to stay away from her

You have to looks for her and apologies for being selfish to her

You have to learn to love those who loves you

But if you know that when you reconcile with her, you will continue the beast character, just let it end like this

Jackandrose:
Good day nairalanders

i've been living under the fear of having a heart problem for more than five years, but my people refused that i should go for scan probably because of fear that it might be true, and there won't be money to care/treat it..

Even me, i'm afraid to go for scan, because the moment it is comfirmed to me, i don't kno if i would be able to live with it..

i can't run nor do hard work, my pulse is always high and sometimes my breathing stop totally.. I've fainted multiple times, and i've been living under depression for so long..

Now, this symptoms is increasing on daily basis, but my people dosn't want me to go for scan.. Is like they already knows the result will turn out positive.

But what if i go for scan an the result shows that i have a heart probem, how will i be able to live with it, knowing fully very well that we don't have the money to cure it..

I don't kno what to do nairalanders, i need advice..

Those that went for HIV test a D it came out positive, have they died

You are having some health challenges and you are scared of going to the hospital because the result may be positive, what if UT comes out negative will you still doubt the result

I think the problem may be BP, and you need to be sure what is wrong with your health then live by the rules

Pls help yourself

Degunners:
You are absolutely right. I am not really addicted to alcohol, I can stay weeks without drinking. It's just that anytime I hang out and I drink beyond my control I tend to misbehave.

I am really fighting to quit alcohol entirely. I hope I get to that point.

I have really waste away my fortune because I would have been far far away from where I'm now.

Thanks

I hope and pray that you will be determined to reverse your ways

This will bring tears to your eyes...

A Facebook user Funmi Afolarin just posted pictures celebrating her late husband 40th birthday by adding him to the family pictures.









Lalasticlala

She wonderfully well

Stargurl20:
When will men cease from discussing sex sex sex? Is there nothing else in the union called marriage aside sex?
It's honestly so annoying that some people have to even support rape in marriage. I'm not a feminist but It's high men started thinking of more important things in marriage aside sex abeg. Ahan!

Only few men think of the domestic things in the family, 99% of them thinks of sex because it helps them to calm their nerves meanwhile, women think less of sex, especially the married ones because they have lots of home fronts waiting for them

When a man is tensed, happy or sad, he cools of with sex

I am a married woman, sex is what I think less of because of the task and challenges facing family's

Let them keep thinking of sex, me I don't think I have issues with that, they should own up to their responsibilities

Ayoshewa12:
Amen, thank you sir, God bless you as well

Am a woman and a mother, so I know what you went through

Degunners:
I made a post here which the MOD moved to the business section and since I just created this account I can't comment on it.

I just want to make something clear, I'm not lying or just made it up or trying to seek for sympathy or people to help me pay because I led myself to this stage and I will bear the brunt fully myself.

Why I find it hard to open up to my wife is because little things make her cry and I sincerely don't want her to shed tears for my sake. I will find a way even if not 100% completely honest to tell her about what's going on. I onced told her and I was able to pay off, I feel terribly ashamed to tell her I have gone back to get the loans again.

I want to appreciate those who really took time to give me some good advice. I will by God's grace pay these apps and God's willing this will be the tonic I need to be a better person.

I want to also say I didn't use the money for gambling. Let me explain how i got myself into this mess.

I do job for people and computer. I'm into Information technology, I do installations like CCTV, dstv, etc. So I do get money from clients to buy stuffs for them.

So one particular day I got like 100k to pay subscription for someone, I have this place I do go to watch ball and chill, so met some guys before you know I was into the 4th bottle.

And anytime I'm high, I spend anyhow, before I can get back to my senses almost all the money have gone. So I need to subscribe for the man and I don't have any reserve to fall back to. That's when I started borrowing form these apps. Now pandemic came business wasn't moving, I just have to keep returning to them.

Why I'm so angry with myself is there were times I will get some money, instead of me to prioritise clearing the loans, I still go back to hangout and have a good time.

I love the bad comments because I really need them. With what I make annually I should be very very comfortable but I don't have anything to show for the year I have been working since leaving school.

So I just want people to understand I am tired of trying to be solicits for help. I'm not begging.

All I'm asking for is for ways to come out of this.



God bless you all.

Once a problem is detected the next thing is the solution

You are the problem here because you just like drinking and flexing at the expense of your future

Stop drinking out rather buy those drinks in can packs and drink at home, tell your wife whatever dish you want to drink it with, she will prepare it

I have never seen a bar where they give award to the most important customer

They are there to make money while people like you are there yo waste their fortune

chukwuma0000:
My Dad is been used;

Hello everyone,

I am not the kind of person that do share my issues with people, I rather find a solution to heal the situation than allowing people's opinion that would be decisive at times and can also get you more confused to decide my next in action.

My Dad's attitude has totally changed towards his children and this is exactly what's about to tear us his children apart from him.

I don't even know where to start from.

Before I start, I want to let you know that my Dad is a good and a God fearing man even up till this moment but we his children don't really understand what's going on in our family again.

My Dad lost his wife about 12years ago and till date we have been living happily after we lost our dear mum to breast cancer.

Then, being the first son amongst my Dad's 7 children ,I was in Jss3 and about writing my Junior waec when my mum gave up the ghost.

Since I lost my mum, Dad has been taking a very good care of us to the extent of making sure he cater for our spiritual through prayers, seeing i and my elder sister through university although we also contributed enormously to our educational project and thank God today we are graduates waiting to be mobilized for Nysc.

I and my sister (graduate also) are currently working as we wait for Nysc mobilization and make sure we don't bother our Dad financially.
Still, we make sure our family don't lack little things we can afford.

It happened that there's these girls (23+) with their siblings sometimes that do visit my Dad almost every Sunday and any day they visit my siblings will leaves the sitting room we are managing to other room in isolation showing disapproval on their faces.

My siblings will serve these girls food and when they are about leaving they will be served the second plates while my siblings would be looking for food to eat.

My Dad will be the one to invite them and he will be the one to pay for their transport fare.

My Dad will be the one texting and calling them on phone every single day, and he's doing all these things behind us while we watch his suspicious moves.

My Dad will be the one to put them through in their choices and decisions through calls and texts.

I and my siblings also noticed that he do make calls behind us.

My Dad will be the one to take food to them in their workplace because they work close to my Dad's shop.

The parent of these girls never asked of my siblings and he will be the one asking and catering for some of their needs.

My Dad is still carrying out his responsibilities but he gives these girls too much attention and the way thinks are going he's emotionally attached to them.

I and my siblings have respectfully called my Dad condemning the act but he's so stubborn to listen to our yearnings and stood his ground that nothing can change it.

One Sunday afternoon, one of these girls announced to one of my sisters of her decision to attend a handcraft training institute close to my house and a bit close theirs.

This my sister jokingly asked her where she would be staying for the one year training (abi she would be staying in the school hostel) my sister was shocked when one of the girls told her she will be staying with us.

Beware, this my sister is not in any way in support of my Dad's sudden attitudinal changes that have made him channel all his attention to these girls and their household.

My Dad never told us all these, even to to consult us his children, but we heard it from one of the girls.

In our two room apartment(face me I face you house).

My elder sister had to calm everyone of us down in order confront my Dad.

We are about saying our prayer and interrupted by asking him if what one of the girls said is true.

My Dad became angry, yelling and telling us that no one has the right to question his decision and it final.

And no one would stop him.

Please help us.

I don't know what to do about this situation as I have younger ones my Dad should focus on than giving all your attention to these girls and family of a mother and a father still young and alive with 11 children.

Since your dad has be stubborn and refuses to take your guys advice, just leave him but make those girls uncomfortable in your home anytime they are around

Just let them observe that you hate their presence

They will report to your dad but you have to deny doing it

Tejumola856:
I can see jealousy in you and your siblings, leave your dad, he’s old enough to know what he’s doing.

That's a wrong advice, not even with those girls that are milking him and he has lots of family responsibilities on him

Ayoshewa12:
3 years ago when I had this child... It was nothing planned.

Was it Beautiful? Shocking? Scary? I don't even know... I was fading and someone needed to be saved.

With BP of 283 at 33 weeks, I was wheeled into the theatre for an emergency c.section because of preeclampsia.

Right at that moment, I looked into my doctor's eye and affirmed to him 'I am coming out with my child' and strangely I believed it.

I have promised her to love and live for her and I intend to keep that promise till the end.

When she finally came out, she was only 1.5kg.

Was I Happy, or sad? I don't know.

I am relieved she lives.

I was tidied up and wheeled into a ward, Then a specialist was invited for her... A woman

When she saw how strong she is and the way she cries... She said she doesn't need to be in an incubator.

She ordered for her glucose test to be taken and stuff on how to care for her was discussed.

She was placed under the UV light though and during the night, she would scream and cry... While i hold her hands and cry with her

A day after I was finally able to stand, I started expressing milk for her.... Feeding with a syringe.

From 5mls... To 10mls, to 15mls and sometimes 20mls.

During those times, I was drained, I needed care, I needed home cooked food, And I needed my man to pet me and say sorry for going through this.... But I had none.

Falling into depression while pregnant was my crime.

The top of the cherry? I was broke.

So I have to accept what I am given.

I was drained, I was hopeless...

Those kinds of feelings are something I will never wish for an enemy.


On the 5th day, we were discharged by the request of my hubby... Our bills calls for that decision, almost N2m in 5 days.

That Day, they tried collecting sample of her blood for tests and I had to hold her while the doctor poke through her veins

We went home,and the next day, we tried to arrange some stuff.

That night, I kept getting calls from this unknown number but I didn't pick cos I have be warned not to touch phone or pick calls

Then, around 2pm the next day, I got a call from the hospital line... It was my baby specialist.

She was begging me to bring the baby back to the hospital

Her jaundice level was high and they are afraid for her since almost 48hours she's been taken out of the light.

That was at her naming ceremony... guests are outside, caterers doing their job...

But we have to leave...

When we got back to the hospital, they needed to get her blood sample for EBT.

At that point, I feel what it means to be in pain... I was in pain!


I had to hold her hand while the doctor struggled to get 5mls of blood sample.

The baby was yellow, screaming but the blood sample is needed to get a blood for her EBT


2 days later, they got a match and the EBT was successful.

We were there for over 8 days trying to fight off jaundice under UV light.

During those nights, I remember crying along with my child... I remember giving up several times, I remember promising myself to be strong, I remember telling myself that I will make it and be successful.

And I remember an old man in the late 90s climbing up the hospital stairs just to come pacify me... My cry always reaches them at night.... He said to me, 'the young shall grow'

He is right, the young are truly growing.

During those nights, Another woman told me her story... She has been married for 12 years, gets multiple pregnancies but always loses them at birth.

She gave me the best motivation of my life…'No matter what you are going through, make money because makes life easier'

She was in her 8months of pregnancy back then... I pray you get whatever you want ma'am.

3 years today and I have grown from that scared, broke-hopeless lady I used to be.

I have had another baby with VBAC which was successful.

Looking at this girl, I see someone who never gives up no matter the pain.

Giving up is never an option.

My story doesn't end here… And this took me a lot of courage to put out here.

Today is for you, Azeezah.

I thank God for giving me the courage to tell this story... I hope this gives hope to someone out there going through it all.

I pray you never give up no matter what you are going through.

And, I thank God for giving my grandma to me, she was there...Like she has always been, I love you, Grandma

And,

I hope I will be courageous to tell my story another day.

I love you, Zizy.

Happy birthday to my bubbly pack of energy.❣️

All I can say is that you are a strong woman and you have passed the worst stage of motherhood trial through child birth with that number written in your BP

You and your wonderful daughters are the testimonies of your life

You will live for them and they will continue to be the light that illuminate your happiness

God bless your family

officialmario:
Good morning Nairalanders

I want to use this medium to seek for your advice..

Me and my wife has been together since 2014, although we have not done marriage as we only did introduction, but we planned having our marriage this year, we had two kids, but I think right now I'm not comfortable living with my wife.

I am not enjoying this relationship anymore, she keeps beating me whenever there is quarrel between us, she is fond of slapping me and giving me punches, at times she makes use of wire and and broom to scatter my head.

The one that happened on Monday is really giving me much concern, she checked my phone and saw a friend I was chatting with and instead of her to ask me about the lady, the next thing she did was to slap me and she started beating me to the extent of having right hand dislocation.. It's not as if she can beat me if I decided to fight back, I don't want to raise my hand on a woman, it's a curse and I don't want to do that, this is getting out of hand and I am not living comfortable at home again, we sleep on different bed, she doesn't allow me touch her again.

She is even planning to get a room by ending of this month when she gets her salary..
I told my sister about her behavior, the advice she gave me is that I should beat the hell out of her whenever she raises her hand to beat me.

I have pleaded with my wife to let us continue the way we have been doing before but she wouldn't listen to me.

I am really confused and I don't know what to do right now..

I need your advice my great people of Nairaland.

Since you are too weak to handle your wife, I don't mean that you should beat her but there are ways of handling stubborn people

The only advice you need is for you to pack out or let her wish come through by ending of so that she can pack out

Just leave the kids for her, unless you want more problems

I don't know how you allowed it go to the stage of beating you like a kid

Even if she is the one feeding you

Lee99:
Hey Nlanders, I'll be as brief as possible. So I met my current gf mid October 2021, she's sweet and loving though very stubborn and has an I don't care attitude. I'm trying to change her and she's a work in progress.

But lately, all she talks about is having a baby, she wants to be pregnant so bad, and I'm not ready for fatherhood or the challenges with it. I like her a lot but mehn I don't understand her again, she's hellbent on this pregnancy stuff.

According to her, anything that makes her take in she's gonna keep the baby whether I like it or not, when she saw her period last time it was a huge sigh of relief from my part, now I've nutted more times in her than I care to count and I hope they were blanks because I honestly don't want to deal with it, tho if it happens that way I'll have to man up and take charge of things, I only hope she gets her period soon then I can start using protection whenever we have sex, whether she likes it or not.

Bashing is allowed but try to make small sense please.

You never see anything

Once she has made up her mind, she will definitely trick you to get pregnant

No be woman, they don't miss their targets

favy19:
no be small thing oo.good morning

Good morning my brother