koldej: I'm sorry to disturb you sir/ma, I'm currently in a position I feel I needed a serious advise. I rounded up my service year, Nov.2020, luckily I was able to secure a job in a construction company jan.2021 although m on probation (1year). I managed to secure an half plot of land this month somewhere around Ogun state from my little savings(as a result of this I don't have any savings in my acct) my probation period will be over by dec. With little chance of being retained. I'm actually planning to rough things through to Dec. again this year so that I can do the foundation of the land(which means I will not be having any savings) with high probability of not being retained. Is it advisable to do this when m sure I will probably not be retained or I should save to invest in a business? Still below 26yrs, pls I need ur opinion and suggestions..thank you
If you want to reside at Ogun state, start a foundation of one room and parlour, which you may use as boys quarter or live in
Am saying this because it won't be difficult for you to build and your land will no longer be vacant
Kuriosmynd: Lol... exactly....and the babe came from a rich family.. she got relocation through study immediately after the wedding...and my cousin has been stranded here since
You see my point, he us stranded but have hope that one day, he will get there
Kuriosmynd: I mean how can u marry and your wife is abroad while u are in Nigeria. I don't quite understand especially for young marriage.
A cousin of mine married 3 years ago, my age mate , till today he hasn't been able to relocate to meet his wife. I mean is it possible one guy wont be servicing her steady? How do such husband handle such thought. The Lady is Nigerian and nurse in the U.S. They commhnicate with zoom. I hear of husband keeping their wife in Nigeria while hustling abroad . But the case of wife husling abroad while husband in Nigeria has no wherewithal or visa luck of going abroad is strange. You can imagine the confidence and rest of mind the wife over there will be serviced...this life ehn. You can share ur thought and experience.
If not for her status and position as a USA nurse, do you think such man can wait
He is not even bothered about who is servicing her, He is more concerned about how he will leave this country
JosWatchDog: ESUT Students Packs Feces With Bare Hands As Landlord Kept Deaf Ears To Filled Soakaway Pit (Graphic Video)
Some students of Enugu State University of Science and Technology (ESUT) who reside in one of the lodges outside the school have called their Landlord out who chose to keep deaf ears to their plea.
According to the lodge occupants, their lodge soakaway pit is filled and the landlord’s attention was drawn to the situation several times to fix the eyesore, but he chooses to show less concern.
In a video made available to jtcblog by students living in the lodge, students were seen packing feces with their bare hands as the whole compound is turned into a big mess.
The students identified the lodge as Executive Lodge Akwunanau, sighted at the school back gate in Agbani, Enugu Nigeria.
Speaking with some of the lodge occupants, they lamented that the lodge caretaker who has promised them to always report any issue when there is one said they have called the caretaker and he refused to pick up their calls, rather he sent them a message in their WhatsApp group chat insulting and calling thempr0stitutes.
The students are calling on the Enugu state government and Federal government to come and save them as their health is greatly at risk.
MummyD2020: Experience is the best teacher. But watch how people that have not even dreamt of getting married in the next 10 years and beyond will flood this place with 'myopicism' lol
MummyD2020: Experience is the best teacher. But watch how people that have not even dreamt of getting married in the next 10 years and beyond will flood this place with 'myopicism' lol
MaDaRa01: Good morning my fellow nairalanders.. I'm currently facing some emotional and psychological problems, and I don't know what to do again... Here's how it all happened, and the after effects... I'm the first born from my mom and dad, my sister came after 4 years, though she was born when I was staying with my dad cos dey disengaged for some reason, so my sister lives with my mom. I stayed with my dad most of my life not until recently I came to visit my mom (she already had another two kids for another man) Throughout my stay with dad, I only called and chat with my mom and sis and half siblings. Sometimes coming to spend a few days of Christmas with them. Recently I came back to stay for some month cos of my exams. And also to bond with my siblings. During my first three months, me and my sister have bonded to the extent that we are always together, strolling around together, sometime eating from the same plate. Anywhere you see me you'd see my sister. Her friends and others that didn't know me at first thought I was her boyfriend. It continues like that till this Monday, few days ago, she did sthing wrong that really angered me and I tried correcting her as the elder brother, I beat her up, I really beat her up, even went as far as kicking her in the stomach. You know if you are really angry you do things without thinking about the consequences. Not until I calmed down that I knew i had gone to much, ordinary scolding should have been okay. Since then she started hating me Even my other siblings stop relating well with me, I became a stranger in my mother house. But at first I thought nothing about it,i didn't even swallow my pride to apologize and make up with my sister. my mom asked about the matter I just told her to forget it that I have exams to write I don't need disturbance. Then the worse started to happen, two days later I began to feel it, more like a heartbreak that comes days after you breakup with your girlfriend. I started feeling. Lonely, depressed an physiologically unstable... It feel like I had broken up with my girlfriend of 5 years? I can't stop thinking about my sister, anytime I hear I name or even see her around the house, my heart won't be at peace. Boom!!! I started getting jealous anytime she's interacting with male friends in the neighborhood, I always feel like who are they to be talking with my sister, some how like they are snatching my girlfriend. I almost got into a fight with a guy because of this... My emotions became unstable, I don't want to see any girl Apart from my sister.. I then called my dad and just opened up to him, he called my sister and though she said nothing is wrong with us, just siblings occasional quarrel, but deep down I know it's something else and I can't explain it. One of my close friends said it's infatuation. Others said it's lust, but I don't have any sexual feeling, to her before and during this issue.
Up to the psychologist and therapist in NL. kindly advise me on what to do, if not for my exam I would have gone back, but every single day I keep spending here is only worsening it
You guys come to my aid.
lalasticlalala fp please
I. Will like you to relax your mind and think deep
You were trying to correct your sister and in the process, you beat her mad, it was not necessary
She has been your sister and you never had the opportunity to bound with her and when you saw the opportunity, you went extrem, have you forgotten that blood is thicker than water
Call her and your mom and seat them down to apologise to her in front of your mom and let her know that you love her so much as her only siblings and you will never hurt her again
Just tell her to forgive you in the presence of your mum and both of you will hug yourself
You as a senior brother, you are meant to protect her and not to give her emotional trauma
After that apology, take a stroll about and get some goodies for her and your steps and that the end of your restless mind
Next time she becomes naughty, seat her down and give her counselling
The word am sorry have solved many problems The word pride has created so much problems
4tomandchi: I and my wife have been married for 9 years now, we have 3 children Peace (7) Mark (5) and Zion (3). Our marriage has been relatively peaceful like most marriages but not devoid of little differences couples face once in a while. We live modestly and by the grace of God I provide for my family at least their basic needs.
But one thing that is becoming a real issue for me is my wife's habit of stealing money from my pocket, initially when I noticed my money was missing and confronted her she blantantlly denied it and claimed maybe I lost it outside.
Know fully well that that is not the case I decided to test I heed money under my box and she still located it when I noticed that my money was missing and confronted her with fact she denied at first but later admitted to taking it.
When I asked yesterday that what are the 3 things in life she will never? The first on her list was "I will never steal, excluding from my husband".
Her reply has kept me wondering if she will ever stop stealing, I can't leave any money in my pocket peacefully again she doesn't care whether the money is mine or not.
Please what can I do to help my wife I need your suggestions?
Stealing is stealing, the issue now is if it runs in her blood or not Report her to her parents right away and tell them that the very day you will be fed up with such attitude, you will take a decision that you will not be able to revert because you can't leave with a thief
Make that report in her presence or if on phone, put it in speaker so that she will be hearing you
There are some certain rubbish you shouldn't accept from your partner else you kids will pick it up and that alone can frustrate you yet they won't feel it
Chrisbenn: You all are aware of my moving to Lagos island, I didn't really tell people close to me because I notice something about nigerians these days they have this syndrome known as COMPULSIVE LIABILITY DISORDER in which when they see someone that looks like he's doing well not necessarily doing well persay all they start thinking of is how to get one thing or the other from the person.
So this friend of my dad called me and told me his son needed somewhere to stay for a couple of days being someone I hold really high I couldn't say no so I allowed him.
It's a month now and the guy is still here, this shouldn't be a problem naturally but let me break it down for you this guy has been chased away from 5 different places so for someone that has been chased away from 5 different places I don't need to tell you again anything about the kind of person he is.
The most painful part is everybody that heard that he wants to come and live with me WARNED ME STERNLY against it but mumu me I was saying to myself why are people so wicked shebi it's just to accommodate the guy for a couple of days let me be my brothers keeper. Now I understand better why it looks like people no one dey help.
I have left the house for him and went to my town where I will tell his dad he has 1 week to vacate.
So what ways can I use to evacuate him forcefully because he looks like he's not leaving
My message to everyone reading this is NEVER ABUSE ANY PRIVILEGE OR HELP YOU ARE PROVIDED WITH, DON'T BE THE REASON SOMEONE WILL STOP ASSISTING FELLOW MEN, because now it will be difficult to provide accommodation to anyone again.
I don't see why you are finding a simple challenge like this to be difficult
Simply let his dad know that your office got that accommodation for you and wants to bring in two other new staff to you pending when they will get accommodation for them
That's all you need to say, you don't need to tell them any stupid things about his attitude, they know him more that you do
Just give him date and he will call him son right before you
MeghaneMorgane: I am a young lady in my mid 20s. I don’t live with my parents. I live alone because I work in another city different from where my parents live. My problem now is immediately I get back home from work, I begin to feel lonely. Because of this, I like to close late from work just to keep my mind busy. I close early only if I have other errands to run or if I am very tired.
When I get home, I speak with my parents who try their best to keep me company. But there is still lots of time left before I go to bed. In the height of my boredom, I come to nairaland. Then I go to other blogs to read the news. I read all the news blogs I normally follow. I check out my chats on WhatsApp and Telegram. Usually there isn’t anyone chatting with me because everyone is busy with their lives. I go to Youtube which I have become tired of watching. And at some time I’m just bored to my mind. I don’t like to impose myself on anybody and so I only chat with people who come to chat with me including neighbours.
Sometimes I just want someone around that I can talk to but I’m alone by myself. Single people, how do you cope with boredom. I mean single people who are really single not the ones cohabiting or visiting their partners. Some tips will be very helpful right now.
Get a boyfriend and you guys should start dating It's another way of staying away from lonely life
Demigod22: My neighbor persuaded me to be school father to her school daughter since she finished her examination and travelled. We are both in final year, but the school daughter is in 100 level. We are living in the same lodge.
I am trying my best to provide for this girl because of exam injury, and we spent a lot of time together. She comes to my room and I stay in her room till late into the night. So recently I noticed that she gets angry whenever I have female visitors. She is even angry whenever I am nice towards other girls in the compound.
I am not in any relationship presently but I have couple of girls that we catch cruise together every now and then. Anytime a girl walk into our compound she will frown and ask me if the girl is my visitor. She is just my school daughter, and she is trying to interfere with my sex life. How can I handle this situation?
Your closeness with her, is giving her the impression that you want to date her and its just a matter of time
She fills since you have her, why bringing other girls around
So seat her down and make it clear to her that you are only watching her for her own safety and nothing attached to it
Kedoty: My brother's wife called me yesterday to report my brother, she said their daughter called her two days ago about what her dad has been doing to her.
She told her that, her dad has slept with her twice, so the mother called me to report the case that she's confused and doesn't know how to confront her husband.
The daughter said the first day he slept with her was when her mother went on night vigil in the church. The second time he left his room at the middle of the night pretend to go and urinate and went to daughter's room to sleep with her for the second time. He has threatening her not to tell anyone.
Honestly for the past 2 days I couldn't sleep, was just thinking on how to approach the situation and how to rescue the inocent girl from abusive father.
The girl is around 17 years old.
Please your urgent advice needed. ( They are in Abuja while I'm in Lagos)
That's a taboo and you have to travel down to stop that nonsense before the effects will befell on the entire family
He must cleans that girl else she will not marry and may not have children
He must do the sacrifice in his village not town where he lives
Irijosa777: I'm the last born in the family, all the members of the family had gotten married except me. I'm 32 now, just rounded up my study. I'm into farming, school works and doing catering work as well. I'm financially balance. I have not gone into a relationship before, I just ignore that aspect because I believe in the principle of "one thing at a time".
Now that I'm through with my study and I have something doing, I'm planning of going into a relationship and get married at least by 2023 but I'm perceiving there's going to be a problem between me and my family.
My family is very selective, very selective... There was a time a friend started visiting me anytime I went to the village, my mother notice it and told me that the girl is not welcome in the family, she gave me her reason too, I told my Mom she is just a friend and nothing more.
Today my neice got married, I invited my crush and she came to the wedding and I introduced her to my family as my friend, when the ceremony was going on, my sister told me and I quote "this girl you brought is not acceptable, she is too old for you, "common" she is just 27 and am 32... I told my sister that we are just friends and nothing more, then she said better...
I don't want to have any issue with my family in marring a girl but I'm afriad problem might be inevitable because I won't want my family to choose who or who not to marry, I have never had issue with my family before, they love me very much and we are living happily.
One mind is telling me to follow my heart another mind is telling me don't let a woman bring issue between you and your family... Gosh! family get wahala! What is wrong in marring a girl of 27 years and I'm 32. (5years different)
I'm not ready for any family wahala... Please how do you handle this kind of issue.
You to seat them down and talk with them about your plans to get a woman and get married to
Ask them what's what's their opinion
The first question they will ask you is, so you ha e any woman you are dating.?
Just tell them that you need their support on any woman you want to introduce to them, very simple and end the talk their
Yaruk1: Pls kindly advise appropriately if you are in my my friend's shoe. She lectures in one of the newly created universities (FG) and now cola-cola has invited her for on the job training as either a field officer or a supervisor. Pls kindly lend you voice with respect to what she should do. Thank you all.
Let your friend go for FG, because of job security
Family › Re: . by frozen70(f): 5:48pm On Aug 06, 2021*. Modified: 6:29pm On Aug 06, 2021
helplesschild: good day nairalanders, I'm going to try and be brief with this, I've been an avid users of nairaland, I had to create this account because of the sensitivity of what it entails.
It happened that I've being serving an uncle of mine for the past 8 to 9 years now, and he was supposed to have settled me 4 years ago, but it appears he doesn't want to and has looked for every possible means to discredit me, hereby always painting me bad in presence of my family, that aside, I have this girl I started dating 2 years ago, we are in some serious relationship, even though I have nothing, this girl was willing to be with me, she was staying with her elder sister somewhere in Abuja, immediately her mum passed away. this elder sister had to start giving everyone in their family some kind of attitude, long story short, she chased away my girlfriend out of her home for no reason other than saying her husband is nolonger comfortable with her,(story for another day) she was stranded and due to the fact that this my uncle gave me a one room to stay in one of his houses as I am not allowed to serve him from his house, one night at almost midnight before the lockdown last year, she knocked on my door, crying with her bags, telling me her sister threw her out, I didn't ask immediately what happened because I've always known the kind of person this her sister was. I took her in with plans of reconciling both sisters.. I tried all to no avail I kept calling, days, weeks passed.. more than 3 months of trying to take her back to her elder sister failed, all she was saying that she can't come between her and her husband, I almost forgot to mention when I forced my girlfriend to stay at her gate and beg, telling her not to return that in the end I know her sister would not bear to have her sleep outside the gate.. well, she slept just outside the gate that night and Even got sick few days after from the severe mosquito bites. that was how I gave up and started living with her against everyone's wish even though my uncle must not find out as it's gonna affect my services with him.. well I can't say if he found out or not, but I'm currently in a dire situation.
long story short, babe is 4months pregnant which I discovered late, because we can't have a child just yet, she can't go back to her family with a child and I can't either, now my uncle would have the right to justify him not wanting to settle me, well I thought of abortion, but it's late. I'm very broke, no serious financial capabilities to even finance her antenatal. plus she can't continue to stay with me so as news won't get to my uncle for him to have reasons to push me away. infact we've carefully thought through this and we both agreed to give out the baby to the motherless homes or whoever that thinks he/she would take care of the child, as I heard that there is a lot of people who needs atleast a child would go through this means... she needs a place to stay and give birth. .
reach me on the mail on my signature then we can talk better if you have any say in this situation.
we are both located in Abuja and I also don't know if dropping my number here would be safe.
If after adopting out the child, will you stop making love to her to avoid more pregnancy
If you adopt out this child, will you still marry her or drop her for another woman
If you can't take her to your family wherever they are to start living with them
You can look for homes that accept pregnant women ready to adopt their child, those homes are the real baby factory
inumidun2010: From a NEUTRAL POINT OF VIEW.. When you get married, you adopt a new FAMILY (by MARRIAGE) while withholding the former but the NEW FAMILY becomes your PRIMARY RESPONSIBILITY( Imagine your DAD using your school fees to pay for his brother's business). I also DISCOVER that NIGERIAN MUMS seems too CLINGY to their SONS even after MARRIAGE forgetting that THEIR SON is now SOMEONE'S HUBBY which is not APPLICABLE to FATHERS but they Dont try that with their DAUGHTER because they know that it doesn't go WELL MOST TIMES with their SON-INLAW.. I as an INDIVIDUAL won't stay UNDER THE SAME ROOF with my WIFE and MY MOTHER, but i'll make sure she gets the required attention and CARE from me.. I've attended many WEDDING CEREMONY that the PASTORS begs the MOTHER-INLAWS from both side to please allow the NEW COUPLE enjoy their MARRIAGE without INVASION of PRIVACY and they always emphasize that FATHER-INLAWS Dont do that because they are not WIRED like that...
Anfieldboss: If you are his mother, how will you feel if your son ejects you from a house he built for you and move you to a rented apartment (mini flat for that matter), just because he is getting married
Women should always remember that one day they will become mother in-laws to their son's wife.
Why not ask him why he brought this to the forum If it was something he could handle by keeping his mum, he won't bring it up
Weyrehmod: Everyone around me don't wish to help me.. I've reached out to more than 100 people (friends,family,relatives and even some people online) none was willing to help even when i knew they're capable of helping I've come to realised that there's a strong spiritual force holding me down. Everyone around me seems to be doing good why's my own so different, recently each day of my life has been so meaningless
I'm really frustrated this very moment
Check yourself and see if it's pride
Check and see if you have been disrespectful
Check and see if you can adjust some of your attitudes that can't be tolerated
DoggoneDogg: After fucking around like a wh0re & enjoying different dicks, you now want to push your responsibility to another person so that you can continue fucking around again.
Shameless hoe.
I pray nobody takes that child. You must raise that baby & if you dare do anything evil to harm that child because you can't wait to hit the streets fucking again, may that baby's soul torment you till you die a painful death.
Nonsense.
This is not necessary, anyone can be on this unwanted situation
Candidlady: As a lady I still find it hard not to do kwaya (drugs). Bad influence I guess or maybe because I saw my dad and his cliques doing it so it rub off on me
Been to rehab couple of times, currently taking a counseling class although I haven't attended for like a week...
I find myself doing it although deep down I don't wanna, but it is something I can't help
Please if anyone is going through this phase or has passed and overcome kindly share your experience to help conquer this war against drugs and alcohol
Thanks
Addiction is real and deadly
You have to bring yourself out from this slavery No one will do it for you
Itidicious: I need your advise seriously,i am an under graduate and i am so passionate about furthering my education.
After reading more on the internet i noticed that medicine and surgery is stressful and needs a lot of serious dedication to succeed, from my finding you can be expelled if you fail twice or when you are not able to meet up to the expected standard.i need to be careful because i don't just want to make a wrong decision in my life since am the one sponsoring myself..
I really needs to be sincere,for work i am a cryptocurrency trader ,i don't read chart but have join a v.i.p signal group,i make 50 k Monthly with trading ,i am also learning other digital skill ,i am also an electrician but i don't concentrate so much in that ,i only make small money with it to gather for my basic needs. I have 200 k in my account for a start.. for accommodation i live with my Aunt.
I have free accommodation,food and enough time,
please with all this is it possible to concentrate and succeed if i decide to go for medicine and surgery ? Your advice will be highly appreciated.
I think the best for you is to concentrate on getting into medical school now that you have the interest and passion
Career › Re: Business Or Building A House by frozen70(f): 4:30pm On Aug 09, 2021
